So if my dedicated readers are wondering why my major stories haven't been updated lately and why I'm indulging in all these drabbles, the answer is pretty simple.
My bosses are sadists, and I'm working six days, sixty hours a week, I am not even going to attempt working on something I care about in the state I'm in right now.
Regardless, this could be funny if I get any response to it I'll expand, eventually Drarry and whatnot. Read, review, and most of all, try to have fun.
Lord Draco Malfoy stood tall and proud in a stark white expanse that did not appear to have a floor, yet when he tapped down with his heel he could easily hear a clicking noise and feel resistance to his strike. He frowned at that, this was a bit too similar to one of Harry's legimacy pranks for comfort, but that was impossible since his one time rival, and eventual friend had been dead for fifteen years.
"Yeah, fifteen bloody boring years, do you have any idea how quickly having a single sudoku book gets old when it's the only entertainment you have for a decade and a half? Seriously, Death and his sick sense of humor..."
Eyes widening Draco spun around to see a man lounging on a bench behind him, he was wearing a very recognizable ensemble consisting of a leather bomber jacket, black slacks, and a Sex Pistols t-shirt.
Him and his damn band t-shirts.
The man laughed seeing Draco's reaction as he sat upright and pulled a strand of ebony black hair behind his ear while the other hand pushed his rectangle framed glasses up his nose, a moment later Harry Potter stood and wrapped the blonde in a hug.
"Dude you have no idea how good it is to see you, since I think honestly you're the only one of my friends who would ever take up the offer I have. Death and his games, ugh, oh, hey sorry bro, you're dead, had a good run though, you were what, a hundred and seven?"
Breaking the embrace and taking a step back Draco assessed this...hallucination and decided to nip this in the bud quickly so to speak.
"Istanbul, what happened between us in Istanbul?"
Harry raised a brow then snorted out a laugh, "You wonderfully paranoid Slytherin you. We were still partners in the ICW Special Forces, our contact was actually a snitch that sold us out and we nearly got blown up by a poorly made IED and ended up portkeying to our safe house.
"We got very very drunk, and I ended up telling you all about my absolutely fucked up childhood, which prompted you to reveal the horrors of growing up a Malfoy as well as the joys of having a Dark Lord living under your roof."
"I never told anyone about that..." Was all Draco could say mystified.
Harry rolled his eyes, "Nor did I, we're guys, we swallow our emotions because they're not anyone else's business, but like I said, we were drunk. Do you believe me now?"
Draco nodded slowly as he sat beside Harry finally asking, "What is this all about?"
Harry sighed at that as he dropped his head back on the bench while stretching out his legs out in the process, "Ok, you know about the whole Deathly Hallows thing?"
"Yes, you use to go on rants about foolish old men betting everyone's lives on children's tales when you were doing paperwork, you would often mutter about the Hallows."
Harry pursed his lips as he put his hands behind his head before continuing, "Yeah, ends up they were real and I had them all. Hermione and I figured out that I was the Master of Death and came to the rather logical conclusion that I really should not test it out. I mean seriously, ordering around an entity as old as creation? Thanks, no, bye."
"How uncharacteristically self preserving for a Gryffindor" Harry responded by simply extending a middle finger, also making it clear this very likely was his old friend and ICW partner.
"Anyway, I'm the Master of Death, and I died at the ripe old age of ninety-two, bit young for a wizard, but not bad really. I end up here at the crossroads and meet Death, who is none too pleased to have a master let me tell you."
"Then he shouldn't have made the bloody Hallows to begin with," Draco responded with a disdainful sniff, Harry nodded enthusiastically at that.
"I know right?! I mean sweet merciless Morrigan talk about creating your own problems, anyway he had an offer for me. I give up my claim on the Hallows, and he gives someone dear to me a second chance to live on in another world."
"Wait, what? What kind of deal is that?"
Harry laughed self deprecatingly as he dropped his head back again, "A loaded one lemme tell you. Basically the Many Worlds theory that Hermione would ramble on about was an actual thing. One of my friends would get a chance to live their life over again in a reality closest as he can get to ours, and he gets his Hallows back and buries them in a very deep hole."
"Why not you?" Draco asked in confusion, Harry waved the question off instantly.
"I'm not scared of what's on the other side, plus I really want to see my wife and kids again. Same went for Hermione, Ron, Neville, Luna, so on and so forth, unfortunately I can't move on until someone picks up the reset token so to speak.
"Death is such an ass...anyway I figured out of all my friends you would be the most likely to take up the mantle and live your life over again. I mean you liked Astoria and all that but it was an arranged marriage and neither of you loved each other really, and your son, no offense, is a monumental fuckup and disappointment regardless. So really, outside of your mother there isn't anyone that you're really going to miss."
Harry winced, "He's in the hot place my friend, and you're as aware as I am he earned it."
Draco sighed, not surprised in the slightest.
"I see... When I pass in this new world, would I come back to this afterlife, or the one there?"
"One way trip my friend, one of the reasons the others wouldn't take it."
It sounded, well, intriguing really. While his life had been memorable, he had not really enjoyed it, and the idea was tempting to live life over again, but the cost...
"I'd never see you again, or the others, would I?"
"Nah, but there'll be us's over there close enough where you can adapt I think, plus, in vested self interest, I really hope you take the deal because this place is sooooo boring."
Draco tilted his head to the side meeting his friends gaze evenly, "There is a caveat to all this isn't there? You know what it is too but you won't tell me, will you?"
Harry's grin was pure mischief, "All I can tell you is you will most certainly be Lucius and Narcissa Malfoy's sprog, and you'll have the ability to do a lot of good and have fun while doing it too."
Draco narrowed his eyes before letting out a sigh, "Oh why not."
Harry jumped up while pumping his fist in the air, "Brilliant! Now go have fun and cause some chaos in my name eh?"
As Draco began fading away he distinctly heard a chilling voice that sounded like cracking ice shudder through the air.
"IT WAS RATHER MEAN NOT TO TELL HIM THE WHOLE TRUTH, MY FORMER MASTER."
Harry just laughed, "Yeah, but it was funny though."
After that thought, Draco Malfoy knew nothing more.
As his consciousness returned Draco's vision was blurry and he heard a lot of crying, and damn was he cold. It took him a worrying few seconds to realize that the crying was coming from him, and that he was being held by a giant, or...oh no...seriously Harry?
"Congratulations Lady Malfoy, your child is perfectly healthy!"
Getting wrapped in a blanket and placed in what he could only guess was his mother's arms, he clearly heard her coo out, "Welcome to the world Dancia Alya Malfoy, my little princess."
Harry, you son of a bitch...
What can I say, adult Harry is a complete troll.