3Emma was laying on her couch flipping through channels when her cell phone rang. She picked it up, smiling when she saw who the caller was. "Hey Regina."
"Heeeey"
Emma's smiled grew as she took in the tone of Regina's voice. "You're high, aren't you?"
"Yuppers. What you doing?"
"Nothing. Just sitting here watching TV."
"Come on over. Henry's out with friends and I have the house to myself."
"I'll be over in a bit," Emma said before hanging up, happy over this turn of events. She had nothing else to do until tonight, so why not get blazed with her best friend. She put on her boots and grabbed a box of Cheeze-Its before setting off
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I keep feeling like I'm forgetting something, Emma thought as she stood in the 'smoke den' (their name for Regina's weed room), staring at a poster of a group of gnomes and mushrooms with limbs and faces marching through the forest. She wracked her brain trying to remember what it was, but all she could focus on were the images in front of her.
"Did you say something?" Regina asked, pulling herself up from one of the bean bag chairs.
"I think we're forgetting something. Something important."
"Maybe," Regina replied as she sipped her glass of water. She sauntered over to her friend, frowning in surprise as the blonde began massaging her cheeks. "What yeah doing?" she said through giggles.
"You have really soft skin," she said as she traced Regina's face with her fingertips. Her fingers ran over Regina's forehead and nose before settling over the scar above her lip. "I've always liked this. It makes you look badass."
Regina grunted and frowned over that, as always disliking when her scar was brought up. "You know I don't like my scar."
"But's a part of you. It's beautiful," Emma said breathlessly as she leaned in and planted a soft kiss over Regina's scar.
Reina looked at Emma, surprised by what had just happened. "You know I've killed people for dong less to me."
"Maybe once upon a time. But now you'd never hurt me," Emma simply said.
"Probably not," Regina said, looking into Emma's eyes. "You're unbelievably sexy."
The two women started leaning in to one another, before pulling back as they heard Henry's voice calling from outside. "Shit. The Kid's gonna find us and see everything," Emma exclaimed, waving her arm towards the table loaded with smoking supplies.
"I told you, no one can come in here. Just sit tight," Regina assured her before disappearing in a puff of purple smoke and reappearing in the upstairs bathroom. She swore under her breath (she had meant to end up in her bedroom) as she went to the upstairs landing. "Henry!"
"Where were you?" Henry asked as he came to the bottom of the stairs. "I've been yelling for the last ten minutes."
"I fell asleep upstairs," she replied, hoping he wouldn't see through her lie. "What's up?"
"We're supposed to go over to Grandma and Grandpa's for dinner, remember?"
"Right, of course."
"Have you heard from Ma? She was supposed to meet us here and then we'd all go over together. But I haven't heard from her all day," Henry asked.
"Oh, right. I spoke to Emma earlier and she said she'll be here in a little bit. I'm not ready yet, so why don't you go to your grandparents now, and when Emma gets here we'll come over."
"Okay," Henry slowly said, feeling something wasn't quite right. "I'll see you two there."
"I love you!" Regina called out.
"Love you too," Henry quickly called out as he went to the front door.
Regina waited until Henry had left the mansion before poofing to the den, where she was met with an unexpected sight. Emma, for some unknown reason, had decided to take off her pants. She was half hanging off the couch, her cute panty clad ass up in the air. "Where are your pants?" Regina asked, not even trying to hide that she was staring at the blonde's impressively toned butt.
"I um, I thought this was more comfortable," Emma replied as she wiggled around like a snake.
"You have to get dressed. Henry said we have to go over for dinner at your parents."
"Oh no!" Emma cried out as she slid off the couch and stood up. "That's what I was trying to remember."
"I forgot too. So let's get moving," Regina told her.
"No."
"Yes."
"No."
"Yes."
"No, we can't," Emma insisted. "We can't have dinner with them. They'll know we're stoned. And Henry. He can't see his mothers like this. What are we going to-"
She was cut off as Regina pressed her lips to hers in a long lingering kiss that instantly relaxed Emma. Emma sighed as the two of them made out for several moments before Regina reluctantly pulled back. "Okay," Regina said as she rested her forehead against Emma's. "First, you need to put on your pants. And second, we can do this. I'm a queen and you're the savior. We're the two baddest assed bitches this town has ever seen. We've defeated snow queens and giants and dragons. We can certainly get through one dinner with your parents while stoned. Okay?"
"Okay," Emma said as she looked over at the smoking table. "It might help it we smoked again before going over."
Before Regina could even process how bad of an idea that was she nodded vigorously in agreement. "Yes, that might help. But we have to be quick.
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"I don't think I can move," Emma said dreamily.
"Me neither, but we have to," Regina replied as she forced herself off the couch and pulled Emma up with her.
"This was a bad idea," Emma said as she struggled to put on her jeans, almost falling over in the process. "A very very bad idea."
"Don't worry, we can do this," Regina said, trying to suppress her giggling. "Come on, we have to go. I'll magic us there."
Emma stood in front of Regina before catching their reflections in the mirror. "Crap, our eyes are completely bloodshot. Do you have any Visine?"
"Have you just met me?" Regina asked as she waved her palm in front of Emma's face before repeating the action in front of her own. "There, all better."
Emma looked herself over in the mirror, seeing that her face now looked like it normally did. "Cool. You have to teach me that."
"All in do time."
"Do time," Emma said with a giggle. Regina started giggling along, which turned into a full on laughing fit.
"Okay, okay, okay," Regina said as they got ahold of themselves. "Lets do this. One, two."
"Five!" Emma yelled as they disappeared from the den. They looked around, seeing they weren't in front of the loft. "Where are we?"
Regina looked around, seeing they were at least three houses from where they needed to be. "Crap, I overshot it. Least we're on the right street. Come on, lets go."
The two ladies leaned on one another as they stumbled down the street, both unsure if their legs would carry them to their destination. "When Henry was a toddler," Regina giggled. "He would stumble around when he was really tired. He looked like a tiny drunk man."
The two women laughed at that mental image before finally making it to the loft. "Okay, deep breaths, deep breaths," Emma said as they both deeply breathed in and out. They forced themselves to appear as if nothing was up as Emma rang the doorbell, which was answered by Snow a few moments later.
"Hi," she replied, frowning as the two women burst into hysterical laughter. "What's so funny?"
"Nothing, just something from earlier," Regina replied, waving her hand around.
"Hi Mom," Emma said as she kicked her mother's cheek. "How are you? What's for dinner?"
"Cheesy chicken," Snow said, feeling something wasn't quite right with the two of them.
The three of them stepped inside as Regina spotted Henry playing with Neal. "Baby!" Regina cried out as she went over to the pair. "Hi there," she said as she picked up the infant. "You're such a cute baby. Yes you are. Yes you are."
"Mom?" Henry asked questionably. While his mother didn't dislike his uncle, she was never this affectionate towards him.
"Don't worry, you're still the cutest baby ever," Regina said, tousling her son's hair while making faces and laughing as Neal laughed right along with her.
As Snow took in this strange sight Emma made her way over to the coffee table. "Oh my god, I'm starving. What are these?"
"Mini quiches," Snow said as she watched her daughter rapid fire consume the appetizers. "You know we're eating in a few minutes."
"So good," Emma moaned as she ate a few more quiches and then started in on the chips and dip.
"Okay, next person who brings the garbage out has to remember to make sure the lids are on tight," David said as he entered the apartment. "Something got into the cans and got garbage all over-" He paused as he took in the bewildering sight before him. Snow and Henry were looking on in confusion as Regina enthusiastically played peek a boo with his son, while Emma was hunched over the chips and dip eating as if she'd never have food again. "What's going on?"
Just then the kitchen timer went off. Snow went to check on dinner, with David following her. "What's up with Emma and Regina?"
"I have no idea," Snow replied as she took the chicken out of the oven. "They've been like this since they arrived."
"You think they went to the rabbit hole before coming here?" Charming asked as he helped his wife put everything on the dining table.
"Henry said he spoke to Regina just before he came here. She told him Emma was meeting her at her place, and then they were going to come here together. It's possible they stopped there on their way over.
"Maybe," David said as he looked at the two women.
"Least they're in good spirits," Mary Margaret stated, watching Regina play 'got your nose' with Neal. "Okay everyone! Dinner!"
"All right!" Emma yelled as she raced to the table and eagerly sat down. Regina handed Neal off to David, who put him in his high chair as everyone sat down and started serving themselves.
"What is this?" Regina enthusiastically asked as she put four pieces of chicken on her plate.
"Cheesy chicken. Baked chicken breast folded over and stuffed with cheese," Snow answered as Regina took a large helping of mashed potatoes and steamed broccoli and covered everything with lots of vinaigrette salad dressing.
"I love your chicken," Emma exclaimed as her parents and son watched her take five pieces, an extremely large helping of potatoes and broccoli, and dolloped sour cream on everything. "Oh my god, this is so good," she moaned as she vigorously dug into her chicken. "So good."
"You're really hungry Ma," Henry exclaimed as he started in on his dinner (he only had one piece of chicken since his mothers took so much for themselves.)
"Starving," Emma thickly replied as she swallowed.
"Emma, don't talk with your mouth full," Snow gently stated.
"Okay Mom," Emma replied, sounding like a teenager.
"This is delicious Mrs. Charming," Regina said, giggling over what she had said.
The three sober ones in the room each shared a look of confusion at the two women's antics before David cleared his throat. "Regina, a few people have mentioned that the lights on the cinema sigh aren't that bright at night. They might need to be replaced with brighter bulbs."
"I'll get on that. Cause I'm Regina and I'm the mayor and I keep this town running," she stated in an exaggerated bossy voice.
"Oh my god, that's hilarious," Emma said as she and Regina laughed. "You're so funny."
"Okay, what's up with you two?" Snow asked.
"Nothing," Regina and Emma answered at the same time, sounding like chastised children.
"You guys have been acting weird since you got here," Henry stated.
"Did you have a drink before you came over?" David asked.
"Yup, that's what it is," Emma quickly said. "Regina had some cider and she asked if I wanted some and we had a couple glasses."
"Yes, that's what happened," Regina replied as she looked at her son. "Henry, I'm sorry you had to see your mothers like this."
"It's okay," he replied. "It's not that big of a deal. At least you guys are happy."
"Yes we are," Regina said as she put her hand over Emma's and the two of them shared what could easily be described as a look two lovesick teenagers would share.
The Charmings and Henry looked at the women, not sure what exactly was happening. Luckily Neal chose that moment to throw his sippy cup to the ground, which broke the tension. David quickly cleaned up the mess as Henry began telling everyone about a project he was working on in school. Both his mothers nodded along to what he was saying as they vigorously ate their diner, both of them moaning over how good the food tasted.
After diner Henry suggested they all watch a movie together. They all got comfortable in the living room and started the film. As the action on the screen unfolded David glanced over at Regina and Emma on the couch, seeing his daughter leaning against Regina while the brunette wrapped her arms around her. He did a slight double take, surprised by the level of intimacy between them, but decided not to comment.
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"That was fun," Regina exclaimed as she opened the door to the mansion.
"Sure," Henry said as he and his mothers walked in. He looked at the two of them, wanting to inquire about their behavior, before deciding to just let it go for now. "Okay, I'm going to go to my room."
"Alright," Emma said as she hugged him. "I love you."
"Love you to," Henry hastily replied as he pulled back before Regina engulfed him in a hug.
"I love you my little prince."
"Okay, I know you love me," he said as he pulled back. "I'll see you tomorrow.
The two women waited until their son was in his room before scurrying to the smoke den. "Oh my god, I can't believe we got away with that," Emma said with a grin, feeling like a teenager who just avoided being caught doing wrong.
"Yes, but we'll have to be more careful in the future," Regina replied. "I doubt we can pass off just being drunk a second time."
"Yeah," Emma said as she plopped onto the couch, Regina sitting next to her. "You know, I couldn't stop looking at you during the movie."
"I'm well aware dear," Regina said softly, brushing a strand of Emma's hair behind her ear.
"I wish we had been alone, without my parents and Henry there."
"We're alone now," Regina said simply.
Before either of them could contemplate the gravity of their actions Emma pushed Regina down and leaned over her, their lips connecting in a passionate kiss. They sighed in content as they made out as enthusiastically as teenagers.
As always, reviews are greatly appreciated.