"Bella, you can't do this!" Edward screeched furiously, they had been going at it for ages with no sign of resolution.
"Edward we're too young; this would change everything! Everything you've worked so damn hard for! I cannot, no I will not be the reason you don't go to medical school. This is the only option!" I said calmly, as I felt the wetness of my tears soaking my cheeks.
"Who says this will change anything?" Edward asked reasonably staring into the eyes of his one and only love.
"Edward, it changes everything! Babies change things! It's my body and I will do as I see fit, I don't want to do it, but we are sixteen!" I said trying to be reasonable, the tears pouring down my face. Edward started at me, though he didn't say anything, then he just turned and left.
I had not spoken to Edward in three days, the longest we have ever gone without speaking or seeing each other since we meet and became best friends ten years ago.
Today was the day I was going to the clinic to sort out the little problem that lay in my belly. I didn't want to do this, but what choice did I have? My resolve to the situation lay in the fact Edward and I are only sixteen and juniors in high school! There was no way we could have a baby…. Right? As I walked towards the clinic from my car I began to doubt everything. I loved Edward more than anything and this thing inside of me was made in love and celebration of our one-year anniversary of being official, could I really kill something that is part Edward?
I walked into the clinic, the stark white walls of planned parenthood, the smell of bleach and the fluorescent lights made every part of me shake with fear. I signed in and turned to take a seat, looking around I saw women of varying ages and sizes, some looking about ready to pop and others who looked exactly the way I felt. Nervous. I tried not to stare at the heavily rounded young women siting with I assume her partner, but something drew me in. They were talking animatedly about something, smiles plastered on their faces and his hand sprawled across her abdomen. I realised then that I wanted to be her, only it was Edwards hand on my swelling belly that I wanted. I realised then that I could not kill the baby that rested snug inside me, because if I did I would be killing not only a part of me, but I would kill a part of Edward too.
I stood up, vindicated in my resolve that I could not do this, just as they called my name.
"Miss Swan? Would you like to come through now?" the nurse questioned, smiling at me. I didn't say anything as I walked passed her and out the front door of the clinic. I needed to see Edward. I needed to tell him I loved him, but most of all I needed to tell him how much I wanted this thing growing inside me.
I drove like a woman on a mission, not fast enough to break any speed limits knowing that my father the chief of police would rip me a new one if I did, but also something had kick started the mother bear in me and I knew I needed to protect my little bean.
I arrived at Edwards house after a while, his black Volvo was in the drive way and I could hear the piano as I parked. It wasn't until I got out of the car did I hear the anger and sadness in the piece of beautiful music being played. I walked up the front steps and in the house, that, for the last ten years has been my second home.
"Edward?" I called, not wanting to startle him. As I walked into the room that housed the grand piano and saw my love, the tears ran down my face. His beautiful green eyes had lost their spark and were hollow, the skin dark and sunken in, his beautiful bronze hair was sticking in all sorts of directions. But the worst part was the empty bottle of bourbon adorning the beautiful black grand piano. Something in the pit of my stomach told me I should leave, but I couldn't. Not when he was like this.
I walked towards him, the music stopped and he looked up. The pain that shone through his eyes broke my heart. I had done this to him. My selfishness had done this to him.
"Edward?" I asked quietly, he looked directly at me and growled.
"Come to gloat, have you?" he spat angrily.
"No- I.." I stammered trying to start, to tell him that I wanted this, that I wanted our bean, that I wanted the little Edward Junior growing inside of me.
"It's done I presume?" he chuckled unemotionally, "Of course it is, why else would you be here other than to gloat that you killed our baby?" he stated. I took another step closer to him but he growled in response.
"Don't you dare touch me! You filthy bitch!" He screeched, I stepped back away from him, my heart cursing my choice to not talk with him properly three days ago.
"Edward listen… please!" I demanded, he stopped what he was doing and stalked towards me, his finger pointed accusingly. Scared of this side of the man I loved, I wrapped my arms protectively around my waist.
"What lies are you going to spew now Bella?" he sang in anger. His eyes darting down to look at my hands and where they rested. "Are you here to tell me that everything will be alright? That... That we are only sixteen that this isn't part of the plan? Well you know what?" His voice flickered between longing and anger and sadness, "I hate you Isabella Marie Swan! Get out of my house and get out of my life, just like our dead baby, you are dead to me!" He screeched as he reached for an empty bottle of bourbon to throw. He threw the bottle and it flew past my head before shattering on the floor.
"I love you Edward, I couldn't do it" I yell as I turn and run for the door, as much as my love for Edward demanded me stay and fix things, my protective instincts screamed at me to run. I left the house and got in my car without looking back, I sped to meadow that was Edward my safe haven, the tears falling furiously down my cheeks. I turned off the car and walked the rest of the way to the meadow. Once I reached the open field I collapsed in a pile of mess. What had I done? The tears continued to fall and the sky changed from blue to black as night came. I didn't move, not even after the ran started. I lay in a foetal position, protecting the only thing I could. Our baby. Slowly I felt my eyes close and I fell asleep in the cold.
I woke in agony, sweat poured down my face. At first, I was disorientated, before the events of the previous day crashed down upon me and before another round of pain hit. The pain felt like I was being torn apart from the inside, I couldn't move but I could scream. I felt something trickle down between my legs as another stabbing pain tore me in half, I screamed in agony as reality set in. I put my hands on my belly and cried. The contractions continued as my body worked to remove my little bean. I couldn't move as the pain ripped my entire body in half. Eventually, I passed out. I was a failure. I was a failure as a girlfriend. I was a failure as women. But most of all I was a failure as a mother.
End of Chapterone…