"Good morning, Agent P. We know Doofenshmirtz has supposedly retired to become a high school teacher, but we've picked up some suspicious activity from his penthouse, and worry he may be up to his old tricks. Go check on him. Monogram out."
Saluting, Perry headed towards his miniature car, kept in a garage outside his office.
While he was more than happy to vanquish all evil wherever it may lurk, Perry found himself growing confused. Dr. Doofenshmirtz had agreed to turn over a new leaf and become a teacher in order to avoid arrest. What could possibly be left for him in the life of a mad scientist, especially if it could get himself thrown in jail?
Busting through the door, the first thing he found to his right was Doofenshmirtz hiding behind a flipped table, breathing heavily.
"Oh! Perry the Platypus! Thank goodness you're here!"
Ducking, Agent P just barely managed to dodge a bright green laser shooting at him.
"CRUSH. KILL. DESTROY," A deep robotic voice echoed through the walls.
Joining Doofenshmirtz behind the table, Perry gave him an angry, questioning glare.
"I know what you're thinking, Perry the Platypus, and no, I have not returned to evil. You see, I have all these homework papers to grade every weeknight now, and it's really cutting into my time. Speaking of 'cutting', look at all these paper-cuts I keep getting."
Perry winced at the tiny red marks all over his palms and fingers.
"I know, right? So I got pretty tired of it and I made this. Behold, the Paper-Grader-Inator!"
PEW! It fired a laser elsewhere.
"CRUSH. KILL. DESTROY."
"Well, the thing is, unlike all my other '-inators', it's not really meant for any evil; I only invented it to grade papers for me. But then as soon as I turned it on, it just turned into a giant, deadly robot! Seriously, what kind of paper-grading machine is that?"
Perry shrugged in response.
PEW! Its laser hit the table, splitting it in half!
"TARGET ACQUIRED. MUST DESTROY."
"AH! IT FOUND US! RUN, PERRY THE PLATYPUS, RUN!"
Doofenshmirtz may have ran for cover, but Perry doesn't run and cower so easily. With one tip of his hat, he threw it like a boomerang at the mighty machine, and the hat easily sliced it in half! (No self-destruct button required.)
In the explosion, Perry's awesome hat landed perfectly back on his head.
"Ah..." Doofenshmirtz stepped out from the support beam he was hiding behind. "Thank you, Perry the Platypus."
Tipping his hat, the platypus closed the door to the penthouse behind him.
"Holy crap." A tall, thin blue alien watching from a distant hill lowered his hi-tech binoculars. "...I want that freaking hat."
TO BE CONTINUED...