"You know, your Hat tried to put me in Slytherin," said Haibara apropos of nothing, because she clearly had a radar for when Conan was actually trying to work on something for once.

She was sitting among a small forest of books in the little alcove at the window, as was quickly becoming her customary spot; he wasn't sure if the Tower made her feel claustrophobic somehow, or if Haibara just enjoyed casting a looming shadow over everyone that much.

"First off – in case you didn't notice, Hogwarts is your school too now," he pointed out, with an added unfortunately under his breath. "So you turned the Sorting Hat down?"

"No, I tricked everyone into hearing Ravenclaw so that I could barge into this Common Room of yours without reason," she answered in a deadpan that suggested she'd heard every word he said; he'd meant her to, anyway. "Of course I turned it down. Don't be daft, Edogawa-kun."

That... wasn't something he'd necessarily put past her, but something in her tone made him look up anyway. "What, green looks terrible on you or something? I didn't figure you as one of those who'd buy into House stereotypes."

"I don't know, Hattori-kun seems to embody Gryffindor's perfectly well," Haibara observed critically.

He snorted at that; Hattori was a great friend, he really was, but some things couldn't be argued with. "Says the Ravenclaw who does Mastery-level work for fun," he retorted on principle anyway, which earned him a missile of conjured feathers that was barely started deflected by the chain of Eihwaz runes twining across the parchment in front of him.

Conan glared balefully at the mostly-failed ward and resisted the urge to bang his head on the table. Ancient Runes, especially in defensive uses, had always been more Ran's thing than his, and he was seriously considering signing up for some other subject in third year if (Merlin forbid) it really came to that again.

He really, really hoped it didn't.

"Do you think it's too early to start turning these in for extra credit?" Haibara asked with every ounce of overachieving nonchalance, so much that he almost didn't catch it when she continued. "And besides, wanting to finish my parents' research at all costs is basically what got me – got us – into this mess in the first place, so..."

Conan gave up; his forehead hit the table with a reverberating thunk. "I knew I should've just stuck with Gryffindor again," he grumbled.

"Beware the perils of ambition," said Haibara sagely, patting his shoulder without sympathy before sauntering off, probably to find Mitsuhiko and the others and impart more wisdom about Wingardium Leviosa than a bunch of first years really ought to know in the first week of classes.

At least he only had his OWLs, although how he was going to go from halfway-to-NEWTs to... whatever it was that first years (even a half-blood with prior exposure to magic) could do, he had seriously no idea.

Conan muffled his groan against the cool surface of the table, and wondered if Professor Kobayashi would take him seriously if he warned her that someone in her class already held a double mastery in Charms and Potions to start with. Or let him test out of her class, failing that.

Probably not, on either count.

It was already shaping up to be a fun year. Conan had no idea how he was going to survive it.


END


before anyone asks: this is just for the AU lolz and will not be expanded on.

(anyway mitsuhiko's also in ravenclaw but i figure the others for gryffs or puffs probably)