5'Til Death Do We Part
Pairing: Kagome X Sesshoumaru
A/N: See end of chapter
Disclaimer: I do not own anything in this fanfic expect the plot...
I didn't understand how it happened or when it happened. I used to only value my life, I never considered that the life of another being was precious...that is until she came along. Being with her was like being with an unrelenting storm of love. If Rin was the one who found my heart, then she was the one who broke the chains that surrounded it. With her unrestricted smile brightening up anyone who sees it, her unrestrained mellifluous laughs, and the love she so freely gave out. By the time I noticed it, she's wormed her way through my barriers and into my heart. And at the time I was shocked, I was shocked at the fact that I didn't even seem to mind it. I remember the moment that changed my life, our life, the moment when I proposed to her.
Her beautiful face framed with her midnight blue tresses, she was bewitching. I walked over to where she stood underneath a Wisteria tree, how proper it was to propose to the one I chose under a tree of romance and a great enduring love. I laughed at her as I was suddenly engulfed with her aura, it exudes happiness and love - for me. She prodded and poked at my barriers until I finally let go and allowed her passage, our aura's danced in the moonlit area. Gasping and covering her mouth as tears fell freely down her ethereal face, she ran and hugged me.
"Sesshou...y-you, are you...?" she questioned, her legs wrapped tightly around my waist, arms on my shoulders. I found it quite cute, she basically had to climb me like a pole to reach my face. Her 5'2 height compared to my 6'3 was definitely a huge gap, not that I really minded, of course, her rage at my height and her having to jump to kiss me was one of the most amusing things one could ever see.
I laughed, of course, of course, she would find out before I actually asked. My anxiety at asking her, at this momentous milestone in our life suddenly disappeared, it was as if there was nothing to worry about. After all, I have been courting her for just over quarter of millennia. My pre-prepared lines were submerged deep into my subconscious, I don't need it to tell her what needs to be said.
"Kagome, I know that we didn't start off in the right direction...with me trying to kill you numerous times - I winked at her and she giggled - but seeing as now i'm proposing to you, something must have gone right. And I swear to the kami's above that I will keep that smile on your face, I will give you hundreds of children - I saw her blush at my declaration - and I promise to fight for you, for us so that we may never be apart. Kagome my intended mate, the key to my heart - she laughed - do you accept my proposition?" I raised a perfectly arched eyebrow.
Kagome smiled sweetly and nudged my neck using her nose, sniffing she said "Sesshou...I will never leave you alone, I accept with all my heart"
I smiled softly at her, placing a necklace that would bind us for eternity on her neck, and slipping on a diamond-encrusted promise ring on her dainty left hand.
"I trust you Kagome."
Uwu
I remember those days, the days when everything was perfect. When we had no worries when the future was still something we yearned for when Kagome was still healthy.
It started with a few headaches here and there, we thought it was just stress after all preparations did have to be made for the Human wedding and he Demon Mating ceremony. A few months later it got worse, the headaches did not recede, the pain was almost unbearable if not for local anesthetics. She would start to cough up blood and that was what terrified me, my Kagome had cancer. I should have smelled it on her months before, and maybe if I had she would still have more time with me. I immediately rushed her to my court healers, after all, there was nothing they could not heal, or so I thought. But because Kagome was only human, because she was only human-made immortal by the jewel they could not fix her, they could not purify whatever disease she carried. I tried the human healers; doctors they were called, but still, there was no hope. Even with their advanced technology and years and years of research, it seemed like they were nowhere near a cure.
I pleaded, I begged, I thrust money in their faces but still, no results. And now here I am holding her hands as I look into her defeated eyes she asks me,"Do you know how painful it is to see you fight for me, to cry for me when we both know I don't have much left," her hands slightly shaking.
At times like this where I would usually close my eyes, I don't. I want to engrave her very being into my mind, her soul has already intertwined with mine, after all, so even if she leaves her reincarnation will always find its way back home, back to me. And that thought is what scares me more, the fact that i'm already preparing for her death when she's still here, she's still beside me clinging on to life. I give in and let a small breathy gasp escape my throat, giving way for the tears to flow down my face.
"You're beautiful," he whispered to her.
She was startled. He could see it in her expression, her eyes, even in her posture, startled...astounded. Being a cancer patient made her lose her hair, her confidence, the color of her once sun-kissed skin, and although she knew that he wasn't like Inuyasha, doubts still lingered in her mind.
She smiled a quaint smile, a timid smile. A smile that reminded him of the old days when he first started courting her before letting her shaky hands firmly grasp his larger ones. He always knew what to say to make her feel like she was special.
Sighing she uttered,"I'm scared - She looked up at him - I'm scared of being forgotten, of being replaced. But you see...I think, i'm even more afraid of being happy - She closed her eyes as tears fell on her hospital gown staining it a dreary grey - because when I get too happy, something bad always happens," she laughed out,"Didn't you know Sesshou, meeting you was the highlight of my life."
The shadows of death behind her dull blue eyes seemed to grow, the ghostly presence of illness and disease tore at his very being. He knew it then, that she was living in the final moments of her life, he felt her aura wavering, thinning to the point of barely even being noticed by his senses if he were not sitting beside her.
"Do not be afraid, I will bring you back, you will not be forgotten, you will stand by my side once again,"he resolutely said, his voice wavering if only slightly at hearing her words,"But if I can only continue living, is it really living if it's without you," he managed to whisper.
She chuckled a bit wincing as pain erupted in her body,"Aren't you used to see people die as a regular occurrence Sesshou?"
"Just because i'm used to it doesn't mean it doesn't hurt," he replied,"and you aren't just anyone Kagome."His hand took hold of her cheek slowly rubbing his thumb near her eyes as the dam broke free and the tears came anew on her tired face.
Her breath hitched, her hands grew limp and her once fiery eyes were growing lifeless. The life support behind him beeped erratically as her will to live slowly left her, her mind now at ease. The doctors and nurses scattered around them trying to save her, but for them, it was as if they were the only ones left in the world.
"Promise me a place in the house of your memories," she breathed out,"I will always love you Sesshoumaru-". A single long beep was heard in the background as the love of his life died right in front of his eyes.
His heart ached, his lungs seemed to give up, his mouth dry and eyes watering.
"I love you, I love you, I love you," he droned out clutching at her body like it was his anchor in life, his tears dripping on the clinical robes she donned haunting him forever with its chemical smell. Her scent under the robes was slowly fading and he clung to the remnants of her memory imprinting them in his mind. The medical staff quickly left him to his own, letting him mourn the death of this woman.
How ironic was it that they only expressed their love verbally at the time of her death. How ironic was it that she may not have even heard. How ironic was it that she once said she would never leave him but she did. And how utterly ironic was it that he once told her he would never care but he does.
UwU
Alone in the rain, he stood... When everyone left, he broke... Alone in his grief, he cried.
Before him lies his world, his love, his life. Adorned in white, red and pink Bleeding Hearts.
How appropriate, you still openly give your love even in death.
You touched my heart you touched my soul.
You changed my life and all my goals.
And love is blind and that I knew when,
My heart was blinded by you.
To the people who don't see, they could feel. A melancholy aura weaving through rain and filling the air. Stray silver locks hovered in mid-air as he stepped towards the black mahogany casket, a glaring contrast to her pure satin white dress. Her pale skin seemingly translucent among the spider woven silk.
Black doesn't suit you, dear, it never has even in death.
He lays a bouquet of Primrose, Honeysuckle, Carnations and White Poppies under her hands and pressed a soft but lingering kiss on her lips.
I've kissed your lips and held your head.
Shared your dreams and shared your bed.
I know you well, I know your smell.
I've been addicted to you.
A grief-stricken smile showed itself on his pale aristocratic face. Cold. She feels cold, how wrong it felt on her, her who is full of everlasting love and warmth. Her who exudes ethereal beauty and smiles.
Twice in this life, you've left me, and now you finally are given no choice. I am alone, and still yearning for you even in death.
Goodbye, my lover.
Goodbye, my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me...
Under the blooming Cherry blossoms, a springtime wonder, beautiful yet fleeting. Spring, a time of new beginnings and new life. The opposite of the scene playing before him now.
Our time together was far too short, I wonder if you'll wait for me even in death.
I've seen you cry, I've seen you smile.
I've watched you sleeping for a while.
I'd be the father of your child.
I'd spend a lifetime with you.
When the tears finally ran dry, the Funeral Director asked him quietly, softly as to not anger the powerful Demon before him.
"Sir, sir...we must put her down. Her body will start to rot, it's already beyond the time we must close,"
The demon made no move as to acknowledge him. His eyes locked onto the shapely figure of his mate, his once future wife. The body that was laying in a dress of pure white, surrounded by his moko-moko. It seemed that it too was grieving if its molting fur was any indication.
I wonder if you're still as loving as you were in life, even in death.
I know your fears and you know mine.
We've had our doubts but now we're fine,
And I love you, I swear that's true.
I cannot live without you.
"I-I mean no disrespect my lord but we must move her body, it's most improper to leave her here."
Glancing at the pale and sickly man, "If you truly mean no disrespect then leave us. I care not for the constraints of time, her body will not decompose...she too is untouched by time," Sesshoumaru softly retorted.
Bowing as low as he could, the Funeral director scurried off away from the irate demon.
He sighed, his jaws tightly clenched as he asked no one in particular still gazing at her ethereal form,"Why is it that beautiful things are entwined deeply with death than life?"
It seems death perfects us. I'll live, for the both of us, until the time when we can meet once again...wait for me Kagome.
Her hair grew at a rapid pace once her soul left the human plane, and it seemed that even after months her body would not decay. She truly was 'The Eternal Miko', whether that was a cure or blessing was not something he let himself ponder upon. The pain of her death was still too raw.
I wonder if you're still as beautiful as you once were in life, even in death.
Goodbye, my lover.
Goodbye, my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me...
"Now that i'm left behind I don't know where I should go," he whispered into the passing wind, amber eyes shining with a light sheen of tears.
I'm so hollow, baby, I'm so hollow.
I'm so, I'm so, I'm so hollow.
UwU
A few days, weeks perhaps even months since Kagome passed on to the other world. I still find myself in deep thought, sometimes with tears running down my face. My heart still aches when I find those little objects or places that remind me of her, which I find everywhere it seems. But I keep going, though the pain still lingers, I'll keep living for the both of us. She'd want me to stay in this godforsaken land and move on, find another to bond my soul with. But right now I don't really see the reason for trying or for talking or for breathing, she was my reason and now I'm just done.
As I stare at her body, inside this enchanted glass dome, suspended on a bed of vines and flowers I smiled longingly at her. Wishing that it was i who should be in her place, wishing that she never died, hoping that some sort of miracle would happen and she would move...but she won't, I know. I understand that not even I nor Kagome could cheat death, but still, that hope buried deep within me lingers, holding on to what piece of my heart remains.
Human life really is just but a fleeting moment for a demon. Perhaps this is the reason why father never mated Izayoi, why demons stay clear of humans because they're afraid of the pain that comes when the human finally dies. It seems that I was worse than father...choosing a human who could never be fully mine, a woman who matched me in both power and intellect, a human I grew to love.
She probably thought I was kidding when I said I couldn't live without her, but life is worth nothing to me now, not when I've lost the one who gave me the purpose to live.
I'm not really living, merely existing...
A/N: Well...in a moment of weakness I decided to post this...Review, and Favourite...