Words cannot express how sorry I am that this site doesn't allow embedding of images, because the actual first post in this series is heavily picture-dependent. But you can see it over on my Tumblr: my screen name is the same as here — look for the first post that comes up on a search for "Farmer Delphine."

These ficlets are loosely connected but they are just as likely to meander off onto their own tangents. Unlike with my other writing, I'll welcome any Farmer Delphine prompts and suggestions; however, also unlike my other writing, these will probably stay (mostly) T-rated. Allons-y!

Off a prompt from obfan22 on Tumblr: Farmer delphine ventures to the farm run by Mrs s to collect some chickens, where she runs into this young woman, who happens to be on a break from university… And Mrs s daughter….. Can farmer delphine resist temptation?


Farmer Delphine: Enter Sarah

"So," says Delphine after they have driven a few miles in silence. The rush of air and the sound of nearly bald tires thrumming over concrete rumble through the old Dodge's open windows and make it necessary to raise her voice. "What are you studying?"

One slim shoulder shrugs. " 'm not. The school sort of gave me an invitation to the world. Social work," she adds at Delphine's sidelong glance. "I was gonna major in social work."

Delphine is momentarily nonplussed. She would not have pictured this almost ferally beautiful girl working toward such a degree. "That's… too bad," she says carefully.

They pass a mostly decomposed grayish lump in the middle of the two-lane highway. "Possum," they say at the same time, exchanging tentative smiles. Playing name that roadkill is often the only entertainment on these long empty stretches of road.

"So what's your story?"

Delphine snorts. "There's not much to tell. My family emigrated from France to come live with my aunt, my father's sister, when I was eleven. You can imagine the culture shock."

"Yeah, well, I ain't exactly from around here either, innit."

"We didn't have much choice. I learned my way around the farm, learned to love it. Went to college, earned a BS in Agricultural Science with a minor in Animal Reproduction, then came back to take over running the place."

Sarah is quiet for a while. "So you grow shit and get cows knocked up."

Delphine can't help smiling. "Sheep, but yes. That's essentially it."

"Aren't you gonna ask?"

Swerving to avoid a pothole, Delphine blinks. "Ask what?"

"Ask me why I got kicked out of school."

"I didn't think that was any of my business," she says carefully.

" 's not, but it's not exactly a secret, either."

The girl slumps against the door pillar, idly playing with her mane of shining dark chestnut hair as it swirls and dances in the breeze. Delphine is struck again by how beautiful she is, how delicate her features are in contrast with the roughness and brashness of her manner. "All right. Why did you get kicked out of school?"

A corner of that delicious mouth corrugates into a wry smile. "Slept with one of my professors. Bloody Economics 101. Birth control pills didn't work and about halfway through the semester I realized I was up the duff. Pregnant," she clarifies, somewhat unnecessarily. Delphine's heard countless versions of this story before, from classmates and girls her age who live isolated on surrounding farms.

"When I told him about it, he wanted me to get an abortion. Said he'd pay half. Couldn't afford more because his wife would get suspicious if too much money went missing. And yeah, the wife was news to me."

Rage boils in the pit of her stomach. "Putain! That fucking asshole! He — "

The wide dark eyes crinkle in amusement. "Don't worry, Blondie, I got a bit of my own back."

"Euh… how?" Delphine finds her jaw and back and shoulder muscles difficult to unclench.

"Fucked his wife's brains out. Didn't tell her who I was. Just made sure as hell that she enjoyed it, and that he caught us in what they call a, um, compromising position. Caused a bit of a ruckus. And here I am."

"Oh." She makes the turn into her farm's driveway carefully so as not to jostle the crates of chickens in the back of the truck. Slowly they scrunch along the winding gravel path. "So did you… ?"

"Get an abortion? Nah. My mum said it was up to me. Keep it or lose it, she'd back me either way."

Disconcertingly, Delphine feels a stab of envy. Had she found herself in Sarah's position, her parents would not have been nearly so sanguine. "You're… very brave."

"Stupid, maybe. I don't feel so brave."

They pull up to the mobile chicken coop she'd built for the new arrivals. Sarah helps her unload the crates from the truck. Together they release the pullets and the sole bantam rooster into the enclosure and watch with satisfaction as all the birds immediately start scratching in the grass and pecking grubs out of the several-days-old piles of horse and sheep manure.

"Well, that's done, then," says Sarah.

Delphine takes a deep breath. "You don't need to get back home right away, do you?"

That crooked, insouciant smile flashes again. "Something on your mind, Blondie?"