Being Happy With Goats.

Oneshot Warning and will never be continued. If you want to expand this into a true fic, tell me, because I would like to read it, and please give credit for idea.


A very old man relaxing in his favorite chair watched as his wife played with their children, and grandchildren. It had been a good run. His life was nearing its end, and he reminiscences about how it came to this.


It was over two hundred years ago, and the, at the time, young man was drinking at a local pub. He had traveled the world ever since he found his wife, now former wife, of two months cheating on him with a rival.

An annulment followed very quickly.

His life wasn't peaceful, with fiancees', a perverted old man, and rivals chasing him internationally. Which was why he was here. He had found a legend of people vanishing when climbing a local mountain.

He simply wanted to vanish, before...

crap the old man was now sitting next to him.

"Don't worry M'boy, I'm not here to fight, in fact I was chasing after you, to give you something, something I honestly felt you had deserved a while ago. I would've given it to you long before this, but you had been moving so well to avoid me for the last three years, I couldn't" the old man said, and slid a trio of scrolls across to the young man.

The young man, showing a level of distrust that the old man thought was hurtful, used utensils to open them to be read, then he turned toward the old man and asked, "What if I refuse?"

The old man went melancholy as he answered, "then one will be destroyed, and the other will have it's name changed to your father. And the third that has all the techniques I know sealed in it, will also be destroyed, to prevent your father from abusing them in ways I wouldn't"

The young man nodded and replied, "You do know the local legends right? If they are as true as I'm hoping, your style may die."

"Or you may spread it to people I couldn't."

The young man nodded, and finished his beer, before rolling the three scrolls up, and slipping them into his hidden weapon space.

The old man smiled, and to the youngster's shock, toppled over dead.

For an instant, he saw what looked like a human woman, with a eye of Horus tattoo, and a ankh around her neck.

The old pervert was dead, having used the last three years of his life to get the scrolls declaring the young man his heir, his mastery, and his techniques, to him.

He had a smile on his face.

The young man called an ambulance and out of what respect he had, which was admittedly little, made his funeral arrangements.

Soon after the old man's will, which was found on his person was implemented and the corpse sent back to Japan to be cremated and the ashes scattered on the land he grew up on, and had still owned, and now belongs to his heir.


The young man, after taking care of that grim business, purchased some camping supplies, and headed up Mount Ebott.

He explored it for several days, all the while knowing his pursuers were getting closer.

Then he found it, a cave with a hole... and he jumped.

The fall was easy for one of his talents, and he landed in a small field of gold flowers.

He found that, due to the pillars surrounding the area, that he was in some sort of ruin.

Walking forward he found a golden flower with a face... that took one look at him and vanished.

The flower wanted a soul, but trying to get one that radiated more power than the six other ones combined was suicide.

The man walked through the ruins with almost everyone avoiding him... except a Whimsun which for some reason decided to ride on the man's shoulder after he shared food with it.

He also talked to it, with the monster offering sympathetic words, and sounds.

He had, while taking a rest, talked about what caused him to travel, and was overheard.

The woman whom approached him, looked like a cross between a female human and a goat, and was wearing a purple robe with a strange marking on it. The marking had two wings, a circle, and three upside-down triangles.

"I'm sorry I overheard your conversation. I have an empty room you can use if you wish. Your friend there can come along.

The young man nodded as he followed the friendly, if odd looking woman.

And so it came to pass, a young man living with a goat woman. They fell into a routine, in which they would both talk in the morning after he practices for an hour, and in the afternoon she would endeavor to correct his education.

The curse came out the second day, and to his/her surprise the goat woman took it in stride, pointing out that she's a monster and is more familiar to magic than humans are.

Progress was slow, but she made some.

Then, a year later, she came.

A fourteen year old child fell into the underground, and walked through the ruins.

She was confused though. The monsters really weren't attacking. Some tried, looked behind her, then left... but there wasn't anybody there. There never was.

Toriel saved her from Flowey like normal, left her like normal, but that was all that seemed to be normal.

Monsters weren't attacking, some of the more annoying puzzles seemed to be solved.

There was an extra number on her phone, which always rang from nearby, but nobody answered.

She was close to freaking out. Even the red eyed specter that always follows her never freaked her out as much.

The specter was quite freaked out as well.

Then it happened, something that was so wrong that it couldn't be ignored... a pillar fell... right... at... her.

She fully expected to be crushed, and was bracing herself, and a crash was heard.

She looked up, and blushed. A handsome male with a pigtail had blocked the pillar.

Without strain... and one hand.

"You alright? You really didn't expect her to leave you alone here... did you?"

Yes, yes she did.

The girl nodded, which sparked a look of disappointment in his eyes, then he shoved the pillar away effortlessly.

"Well she had called me to look after you after she left, and I agreed. When I noticed you had left the room I decided to just follow and make sure you didn't get hurt."

The girl was both blushing like mad, and reeling. She had known something was wrong, as her reset button was flickering, and the other subtle clues, but this was so far beyond what she was expecting, she couldn't really handle it.

The ghost was blushing more than normal herself.

He walked her the rest of the way to Toriel's house, when a particularly stupid monster picked a fight with him, and ended up being thrown out of the room by the strange guy.

'Stupid hormones,' she thought.

The spider doughnut and cider he bought her was good though.

She was caught, like always when she tried to leave the ruins, but her determination forced her to try leaving.

She just hoped that she wouldn't get blasted upon stepping foot outside, like the last one hundred runs.

It was really getting irritating to die upon leaving the ruins.

She was so caught up in her thoughts she didn't feel a wind passing her by.


Outside a short skeleton was waiting, a Gaster Blaster waiting and ready to fire.

The door opened, and he prepared to fire, then the door closed. There were some light footprints in the snow if he looked carefully, but nobody standing there.

It wasn't important, the anomaly was going to soon leave the ruins. He wouldn't let that filthy brother killer pass, just like the last hundred times.

Then a blast of gold smashed into his blaster, just as the young girl cautiously stepped out.

"It looks like you had planed something nasty for the kid," a voice behind the skeleton said.

He turned around to see another human, an adult one.

He used his abilities as judge to gain an understanding of the new human.

-0.5 hp.

He had a migraine. His ability nearly failed. It also almost killed him.

The stats confused him more than anything else though.

Name: Ranma Saotome.

LV: Error.

Att: Error

Def: Error.

Description: Run, don't fight, Run. (EN)

For him to not be able to tell anything about him, it made him dangerous beyond belief, but at the same tine, the fact that he had one of the weakest monsters hanging around on his shoulder, meant he apparently wasn't hostile.

He would have to wait, and see.

Sans then teleported away, to observe.

He observed this... Ranma, letting the girl deal with things on her own, only stepping in if it looked like she was going to die.

It was odd, the girl wasn't fighting back except in a few circumstances, and even then she didn't get a single speck of monster dust on her, which meant she wasn't killing anything.

He did wonder why the older human wasn't interfering.

Unknown to him, she had talked to Ranma and gotten him to back off, and let her handle it, unless it looked like she was going to die.

She kept letting people live. It was if she was a different person that the one that tried to exterminate monster kind nearly two hundred times, although he prevented her from leaving the ruins... alive, for half of them.

Sans shook his head he would watch and see. He might be good at dodging, but from the way the older human got behind him... it wouldn't help too much. He probably would be dust on the wind before he knew it, so he watched from afar.

He noted how the human seemed sad that he wasn't at his post for some reason.

He watched how she waltzed through Waterfall without killing, including Undyne, whom tried to kill her more than three times, and even rehydrated her.

Then she befriended her, with the help of his brother.

He found he couldn't blame the kid for burning down the fish woman's house, after all she was simply following instructions.

Hotlands went much the same, and he noted something. Something that was originally niggling at his thoughts.

The kid somehow knew what to do to stop all the monsters from fighting. There was no hesitation at all.

It made no sense, the kid always killed.


There were resets that he never knew about. Resets where the kid was friendly, like she is now. Resets where she perhaps befriended him.

It would explained the odd hesitance she always had to start a fight with him, including the first time.

He watched her expression fall when he wasn't at his Hotlands post.

So, he decided to meet her at Mettaton's hotel, and have a meal with her.

The conversation was enlightening. How she had done a good ending befriending everyone many times, only for her to succumb to temptation.

She wanted to know, what it would feel like, to kill, to end everything, but her nerve was lost every time she met him. She just couldn't fight him, and so, she decided that it wasn't worth it, and decided to reset, and regain her happiness. It was at this point her heartbroken sobbing got to him. It was obviously genuine, which made him feel slightly a heel for continuously killing her, starting with the reset that she had intended to be a happy ending at least.

He had her in a hug, and noted from the corner of his eye that the other human was watching, but not interfering. The sympathetic look in his eyes was directed at the both of them.

And so, sans let the girl go on her quest, and he couldn't argue with the results.

The barrier broke, and the monsters were freed, and she had king Asgore to destroy her ability to reset, permanently.


Years passed, and the humans eventually allowed them to set up their own town in the surface, and some even moved into the cites.

Then came a day that did more for human monster relationships than anything else could've.

A human married a monster. The name of the human was kept secret at his request, and after explaining the situation it was agreed.

The best man was a short smiling skeleton.

The happy couple were blessed with children years later, but because they were hybrid children it didn't cause the mother to age.

But the couple were content, and frisk eventually gave up on marring Ranma as well.



Decades later Ranma was flat on his back, his daughter had beaten him, fair and square.

She was now ready to assume the role of grandmaster of his school of martial arts, and he had done it without traumatizing her, cursing her, or making her unnecessary enemies.

She even made a friendly rival in a girl about her age with a terrible sense of direction.

Unlike Ranma's rivals, his daughter's rival encouraged her to be stronger, and both benefited.

And so time passed.


The old man was shaken from his memories at the laughter and he smiled.

He looked to the side and saw what looked like a human woman, with a eye of Horus tattoo, and a ankh around her neck.

His smile slightly faded and recognizing both the figure, and realizing whom she was, asked, "It's time, isn't it?"

The woman smiled, and the old man took one last look at his family, and closed his eyes.

Ranma Saotome, former grandmaster of the Anything Goes Style of Martial Arts, Husband of the former Monster queen Toriel... died with a smile on his face.


A old woman, having finally found her quarry knocked on a door with what was once her grandmothers staff, in a small town, mostly filled with non-humans.

She was still getting used to using it as a Pogo-stick.

Opening the door was a tall goat woman, and she asked, "Is a Ranma Saotome here? If he is, can I speak to him."

"He is here, but you can't speak to him," the Goat woman replied sadly, with obvious tear tracts on her face.

"Why not?"

The monster resumed crying, as she replied, "my husband died last night."

The old woman's eyes widened and she turned her sad eyes toward the other female, "May I come in to pay my respects?"

She was let in, and noted the amount of morning monsters, and entered the room she was directed to.

The figure on the bed was covered with a sheet, and had golden flowers set on it.

He was to be cremated the next day.

"Ranma, I wish I had found you sooner, so that we could as the Americans say, bury the hatchet. I wish to apologize for my actions. Both for the kiss of death, and later after the kiss of marriage. I still think we would've made a good match, but my actions ruined it. I was so sure of my cultures and gender's superiority I refused to take into account your wants or needs. I should've tried friendship first.

I know you thought me one, but I wasn't. Stoking Akane's jealousy was a bad move, I can see that now. I would also like to apologize for my grandmother, she made the exact same mistakes I did. She died you know, shortly after Happosai did.

I was eventually let back into the tribe, but I had to start from the bottom and earn my place back. I still wonder if going back was the best choice, the tribe hasn't changed in all these years.

Mousse eventually moved on. The Tribe forced him into meditations, and forced him to think on why he was so insistent on me. It turns out one of my rivals had her mother use some pressure points on him, and when they were released, he lost much of his interest in me. He eventually married, and his son married my daughter.

Ryoga died shortly after you left. Akane had the curse pushed into her face, and killed him in his pig form, after he had gotten her pregnant. Her daughter is a nice girl, but has no sense of direction.

Your father was killed by some Yakuza. He had promised your hand in marriage to the daughter of one of their bosses, and when they came to collect, you weren't there.

Soun suffered a similar fate, but he died trying to save his middle daughter, whom infringed on one of the Yakuza territories, and was captured and put to work in a brothel.

Kasumi on the other hand was captured by a different faction... and charmed the young, but slightly older than her, boss, and eventually married him, and was kept out of the criminal elements.

That was what saved Akane from living on the streets. The Yakuza boss kept up the taxes on the property to keep his wife happy. She died later at the age of eighty-five, and never remarried.

Your mother never gave up looking. Weather to make you kill yourself, or to want to make sure you were happy was never clear. It changed every other hour it seemed like. She eventually moved in with Akane, thinking that you would be back to do your duty, and died soon after she hit seventy. I think she lost the will to live. Her husband was gone, her son intentionally missing, and Akane, barely tolerating her.

The Kuno's were eventually institutionalized, all three of them, and none of them left decedents, so that family is now dead.

Thanks for being patient and listening," Shan-Pu finished with a sad chuckle, and placed the pendant that she had brought as a gift on Ranma's still chest then left.


The next day, Ranma's ashes, as per his request, were scattered in the ruins of the underground, in front of the house he met Toriel in. In an adaptation of monster 'funeral rights'.


Hundreds of years later, Toriel was leaning back in her favorite chair her adopted daughter once named, Chairiel.

She had eventually remarried her first husband, and had a second child with him, but she never forgot her human husband, and now she was old, and nearing the end, and so she sat in her favorite chair, one that had been lovingly cared for, and watched her second pure monster child holding court. Her husband had died a week ago from old age, leaving her with her son.

"Well Toriel, are you ready?" a familiar, but long lost voice said.

It was Ranma, in his prime, standing near a human looking woman.

At the look on her face he said, "Don't look at me like that, she's just letting me help collect you, it's time."

"Time?" she asked.

"To go," he replied, and held out his hand.

She took it, and noticed that her hand was also in her prime. Several steps later, she looked back, and saw her old body turn to dust, causing a stir as her son cried in anguish.

She took several steps and laid a ghostly kiss on her child's forehead, then joined her second husband as they left to rejoin their children, grandchildren, and her first/third husband.


The end.

EN: a CHILD, true with exceptional determination, can kill everybody in the underground, with most of the bosses falling in one hit. Imagine what Ranma could do? IMO he could probably crush the monsters in his sleep should he chose, but at the same time only killed one person... that didn't STAY dead.