"Mother of God." You can count on one hand the number of times you've seen Cyrus Beene speechless, but this is one of them. Realization floods your body.
"You didn't know." Silence. "He tells you everything."
"Didn't tell me this." Cyrus looks defeated with this admission. You can only think of one reason why he wouldn't bother to tell his best friend this major part of his life.
"Because it didn't matter enough." With this, you need to leave. You have to leave before Cyrus, one of your oldest and most trusted friend, or anyone else can see you cry in humiliation. Humiliation that what you truly believed was life-long, deep love was so disposable to him. Humiliation that you, the mistress, had been cheated on and hadn't even realized it. Humiliation that to him, you are the same as Mellie. Humiliation that you had dreamt about your life together while he was in bed with another woman.
Cyrus tries to stop you but you shrug him off. Nothing he can say will change anything. Deep down, you know he really does love you like a daughter, but right now you need to process this alone, like you've always done.
Your back is to the door, but you know it opens. You know he stands there. It's like this sixth sense you have. Hearing, taste, touch, sight, smell, Fitz.
"Liv." You can tell by the tone of his voice that he's infuriated. Damn him! What right does he have to be mad at you for confronting him about the problem he asked you to handle? You stand resolute at the door, still set on leaving. You won't dignify his temper with a response. Your hand grabs the doorknob.
"You think it didn't matter enough?" HIs voice still holds a twinge of anger, but now desperation has joined in. "It mattered too much! I couldn't tell Cyrus because the moment I did, the stakes were raised higher than they already were. Olivia, we were tempting fate as it was, being together while we were on the campaign, while I was married! But as long as it was just our secret, we were safe. It was ours to protect, ours to cherish. It made us stronger. I couldn't tell Cy because I was afraid I would lose you. And losing you? Olivia, that would kill me. I wouldn't survive. I only make it through my day because I know that when I go to bed at night I'll see your face. I'll see our future, our home, our children." By now, he's come across the room to you. You feel him at your back, his breath hot on your neck. He grabs your waist and turns you to face him. You can't bring yourself to look at him. You're conflicted, unable to reconcile what he's telling you with what you know about Amanda Tanner.
"Olivia. Look at me." He gently pulls your chin up to allow him to look you straight in the eye. In his eyes, you see tears just starting to tip over the edge of his lashes. It scares you. You've only seen his tears once, just after his father's funeral. "If you never believe another word that leaves my mouth, you have to know this. I am in love with you. You are the love of my life. You matter enough. Never doubt that." His voice ends in a whisper, but the message is clear. You know your eyes are filled now too, matching his. You know that on the other side of that door are dignitaries and press and politicians and his wife, but in this moment, it's just Fitz and Liv. That's it. You bring your hand up to his face and softly brush away the tears that have strewn across his cheeks.
You look him in the eye and whisper, "We are enough." You grab your purse, walk to the door. "Good night, Mr. President."
You can feel his eyes on you as you exit the Oval and you smile as you hear him repeat to himself, "We are enough."