khr ain't mine

Feel free to write how you felt bout the fic :D

I think the references and terms used are pretty casual... I dunno. Lemme know if it is difficult to get where they're from or what they mean.

ps. Company names are misspelt on purpose, cos it ain't advertising n that this is kind of a parallel universe.(well duh, anime world)


Chapter 1

Arrival into a new world

Sawada Tsunayoshi was a rather average kid. He was a kid who saw his school as his arch nemesis having to struggle with its antics on a daily basis. His textbooks sometimes felt like they spoke latin and greek to him and japanese was hard enough, he didn't need yet another language in his life thank you very much. Math felt like it was straight up egyptian hieroglyphs with weird symbols and just like the aliens conspiracies surrounding Egypt, it was being an utter alien to him.

He was very aptly nicknamed Dame-Tsuna, a nickname he very much didn't need. He was very much capable of making his own life miserable and didn't need anyone else rubbing salt in his wounds. Case in point, he, inspite of receiving borderline atrocious grades, decided to ditch the library, ditch the class study sessions, ditch the spread out, inviting, crisp smelling, gorgeous books on his table to opt for trying out a new game on the table.

What? Homework? What on earth is that? He would personally make buying a dog, his life mission to pin it's mysterious disappearance on it!

On to more important matters...

The internet was currently crazily hyped about a game that was going to be released this day. It was a realistic virtual reality that was partnered with Gookle to provide players the most immersive world that characterized their personality. It was a fantasy sci-fi world that people could explore and thankfully, his dad's rare visits paid off this time with the old man bringing a headset and forgetting to take it back with him.

Oh well, finders keepers. He shall never know!

The brunette put on the helmet as the game booted up for the first time and he felt his visual perimeter change to that of what seemed like a character selection screen.

"Wonder what classes are available? They've been so hush hush about the whole thing. This better be good."

When he stretched his hand out, a bright light engulfed him as character suits with names on top of them swiveled around him. There was a paladin, mage, warrior, hero, archer, elf, thief...

They swiveled right past him, in fact they looked like they were passengers in a train, headless ones...

"Hey wait! I can't select any one of them like this!"

"Precisely"

A mysterious voice echoed back an answer.

Tsuna looked at the last of the characters passing by and then shifted his attention to the spirit who he supposed answered him, his face confused.

"You seem to have forgotten, but the game developers have promised to give everyone a personalized experience into this world."

"What's the point in showing those then?"

"It was to show the stereotypical characters that bogged the MMO world! We wanted to show players that they did not have to walk fixed roads! They can be whoever they wanted to be!"

"Oh..."

"...Kidding. We just wanted to show you guys all the characters you can never choose to be! It's like bringing you to a castle filled with treasure, only to send you to a hut."

"Oi!"

"Well, what do you expect?! Us developers have put hard sweat, blood and tears into this project! We're not even being melodramatic! In the years of developer hell and toilsome effort, many of our members put up a satanic idol and have started a ritual to appease their inner demons and make the computer gods have mercy on our spindly, creepily fast hands!

And then YOU people start spamming us with questions about classes! Classes! When we got the most innovative gameplay mechanism on our hands! Of all things, classes and races! Have you even noticed the smooth fps?! Your hands aren't even blocky! And you're running this beauty of a game in a toaster!

It's like casting pearls to swine! Honestly!"

"Umm... Sorry...?"

"Yes, you better be sorry! The only way we will forgive you guys for breaking our hearts is by loving this game! Love our precious widdle baby! Love it!"

Tsuna was getting increasingly weirded out by the spirits. These guys have no chill. In fact, maybe they need a break from caffeine and offices...

"...So, how do you guys personalize experiences?"

"Are you curious? Well then, we can explain. We partnered with Gookle to gain access to the player's personal data, aka your internet history and the length you spend on each site to say the least."

Tsuna paled immediately. He desperately had the urge to sign out this instance and delete everything right now.

"Nuh huh. No you don't. We've censored any method you can inform the rest of you guys and we won't let you go until we get a character for you that you can never delete! Embrace your essence, Tsunayoshi. Love thy self!"

"Let's see what you say when you're the one subjected to this!"

"Don't sweat the details kid. We have good intentions."

"Oh my gosh. Wasn't Gookle's slogan 'Don't be evil'?! Don't tell me you hacked into their database!"

"The partnership was a true one, my fluffy tuna fishie. Google's getting something out of this too. Live logging of chats and behavior tracking of the players here."

"You guys are worse than that overly attached girlfriend or any yandere in anime. Where on earth is privacy."

"Six feet under. We buried it, muhahaha!"

"I swear, it's like computer based companies want a world wide orgy..."

"We always needed a variation from www. Now, enough chit chat. I shall reveal what you are destined to be!"

Drum rolls echoed as the room grew dark with spotlights circling them.

"You... could aim for the guineas world record for the most average being in the world. You're so normal a machine learning program would treat you as its master-"

"Drop it!"

"In fact you are so mediocre in your tastes, even the more risque ones-"

"Please don't tell me you're doing this with everyone..."

"Want me to lend you some AVs kid? I'll show you a whole new world!"

"Don't ruin Disnay for me..."

"That's the path of being a true adult. Breaking all your childish dreams and wishes. We even let the AI speak the truth for the youngest of our guests."

"What truth shall you reveal, oh enlightened one?"

"Well you know, stuff life there ain't no tooth fairy picking up yo' teeth. I mean what kind of sick f*cker would even do that? A special kinda one if you ask me. Girl's got a weird ass fetish. At least she doesn't make a necklace outta it, like a war trophy."

"Sometimes I feel like the fairy tales people tell kids are pretty morbid."

"You haven't heard the last of it. Do you want to know about what happened to good ol' sleeping beauty."

"...I'll pass"

"Wise decision. Disnay and Pixor eat all kinda grime and sludge only to poop out rainbows for farts."

"Maybe you guys should cut down on the caffeine...?"

"Never! MY PRECIOUS!"

"And probably quit on binge watching movies."

"Yeah... That's never gonna happen. So our algorithm has picked you... Villager!"

"That's an NPC! Quit screwing around!"

"Man... We were surprised too. Your sheeple level is over 9000"

"I don't even know if a villager can fight! What am I even supposed to do with it?!"

"You're so whiny. Fine then, we felt it was a bit unfair, so we tried to get you a second form."

"...And what is that?"

"A multiplying whack a mole based chicken."

"...Somehow I knew it was going to end up like this."

"Hakuna Matata"

"QAQ"

"Look you look like the very chicken you can transform to. You can even say, 'This is not even my final form' when you're a villager."

"Who on earth needs that for a final form?!"

"By the way, if you get hit enough times you might multiply enough to a million."

"Won't the server crash?"

"We figured there's no one jobless enough to do that."

"Well, I'm a very busy AI. So I'll leave you to exploring your new reality."

"I hope the door doesn't slam on you on your way out"

The brunette grumbled as he felt a floating sensation as he descended downwards to the world the VR game had to offer.

The World of Farberge