This is a work of fan fiction using characters from the Harry Potter world, which is trademarked by J. K. Rowling. I do not claim any ownership over the world of Harry Potter. The story I tell is for entertainment only and is not part of the official story line.


Warning: AU, Fem!Harry, Not bad or good light or dark, sort of a SI.


Reading Guide:




Things have become really tense, I went back to crying a lot 'I honestly didn't mean to, but it was hard to control my emotions as a baby'. Lily still haven't spoken to me about anything of importance, sometimes when she looked at me she had that thoughtful look in her eyes. I really shouldn't have cried both of those times when she told me she didn't expect to survive, but as I said, it's really hard to control your emotions as a baby. First time I cried may have seemed like a coincidence but after the second time she became careful of what she said in front of me.

On the bright side, my eyesight improved a lot and I also spent my time working harder on developing my vocals. I slept during most of the day and woke during the night, practicing speech, 'not that it is a lot of time, because as a baby I seemed to sleep a lot. I found it alarming at first but Lily didn't appear to bother about it, so I guessed babies slept a lot normally'. I mainly practiced how to say Mama, Papa, Paddy and Moony. It's true that I didn't think of James and Lily as my parents but seeing as I came to adore and love them, I wanted them to hear their baby 'even if I am an imposter' saying mama and papa. I also tried practicing how to say Sirius and Remus at first but it turned out to be too hard for my developing vocals so I settled for practicing their nicknames instead. I of course refused to practice Peter's name.

Mr. Doory visited one day, warning Lily and James that there is a spy, and it was awful; they suspected Moony. I was sad to see that Moony's visits became less and less. 'I can understand why they would suspect him thou' Being a werewolf, the Dark faction have a lot more to offer to Moony, even if his parents were pro-light it still didn't change the fact that he is a werewolf and also he didn't have any muggleborn friends besides Lily.

Lily, James and Sirius, or at least one of them, were always there with me, if Moony and me were in the same room, they tried to be subtle about it but I think Moony noticed. The most heartbreaking thing is that he seemed aware that they suspected him to be a spy; he would get that very sad but understanding look in his eyes. And then one day he just stopped visiting.

It made me feel angry and bitter at Peter; Moony who had absolutely nothing to gain from the light and even more to lose if the light won stuck with his friends, while Peter served them up on a platter to Voldemort. 'No wonder he is a rat, a rat in soul and body' I thought in disgust.

As the time passed I grew more restless, my sleep was very light and fitful. I expected Voldemort to come blasting the house at any moment.

On a brighter note, I finally succeeded in saying Mama and Papa, Lily and James were beside themselves with happiness. I was proud of myself; they haven't smiled so genuinely for a while. Sirius looked like he was about to throw a party when I first said Paddy, he laughed uproariously, and on his next visit he gave me a black dog plushy. 'Peter is a rat. Sirius was capable of turning into a black dog, wasn't he? I wonder if James can turn into some kind of animal too.' I really wished I could hold a pen and write down what I knew before I forgot anymore, but being inside the HP universe seemed to refresh my memories of the movies but sometimes I simply felt lost.

I wondered if I called for Moony, would they let him visit at least one more time.


Peter Pettigrew thought that his friends were very idealistic. He too was once neutral but later joined the ranks of the Light along with his friends when Lily's parents were killed.

But now he wasn't too sure. Peter Pettigrew was a pureblood, he never knew much about muggles nor did he particularly care about them either. That was until he came to know Lily when she started going out with James.

Naturally as a muggleborn Lily held knowledge about muggles, and sometimes Lily would tell him about the muggle world. Some of the things he learnt were awe inspiring, especially with how much they accomplished without magic. He grew curious and started researching about them on his own sometimes. But even if some of the things he learnt about muggles were awe inspiring, other things were downright terrifying.

The Headmaster kept saying that they could live peacefully with the muggles, he wanted to one day merge the wizarding and muggle world together. But would that really work? Yes the headmaster implemented some muggle elements into the magical world, Yule became Christmas and Samhain became Halloween and many other things to try and make things more familiar to muggleborns. He was trying to make the magical world muggle friendly, but the question is; is the muggle world magical friendly? Would they accept Magicals? Peter wasn't sure at first, but the more he researched and learnt, the clearer that the answer became to him, and it was a resounding; No.

Everyone said Salazar Slytherin was an awful racist man who hated muggles and muggleborn children, but what isn't well known and what peter discovered during his research about muggles is that during the founder's time there was something called the witch trials. A lot of people were killed because they were claimed to be or suspected to be Magicals.

He actually learned this from a muggle history book. There was nothing to mention this in the history lessons at Hogwarts.

One thing led to another and soon he discovered a few alarming things; Albus Dumbledore removed many parts of the history books especially what related negatively to muggles including the witch trials, there were way too many muggles more than all the Magicals in the world counted together, maybe they could subdue and overpower one muggle easily but what about thousands of muggles, thousands of muggles with advanced weaponry that could easily flatten a city.

Maybe they could live peacefully when they defeated the dark but If and when Dumbledore finally announce the existence of the magical world to the muggles, what would happen to them then?

Siding with the Light means survival, yes, but for a short relative peace, before they are all eradicated.

And with these thoughts in mind, Peter made his choice.


Unlike the past months, today was a rather relaxed and slow day. I was sitting in Lily's lap in our living room, she was reading a children's story book for me. It was very boring at first, but I got the idea of using it to try re-learning how to talk. I tried repeating every word Lily said, she was surprised at first but now she reads the word, falls silent and wait for me to repeat it before saying it again if I didn't say it right.

We heard a knock on the front door. I heard Sirius' voice before he came in with James and the worried look on Sirius face filled me with worry.

"Hello Sirius, you are out of work early today." Greeted Lily.

"The boss sent me away today." Sirius said with a tired grin. And I could see why, he looked so exhausted I wouldn't be surprised if he fell over.

"Pippy!" James called for our house elf and ordered her to bring a light meal and a cup of tea for Sirius.

"You should stay the night here." Said Lily concern easily heard in her voice.

Sirius waved her concern away before straightening where he sat -as much as he could- "More importantly, have you heard from Peter lately?" Sirius asked.

James frowned thoughtfully, trying to remember the last time Peter came to visit. "Not really," He said slowly, he too started to look worried.

"I think he hasn't visited for a week now." I heard Lily say, I couldn't see her face as I was sitting with my back to her but I was sure she was starting to look worried too.

"I went to check up on him after work yesterday and the day before too and he wasn't home. I checked up again today but I didn't find him." Sirius worked as an auror, he spent long shifts, and sometimes they stretched into the night due to the war -it made things busy- , so it seemed worrying to them that Peter wasn't home at such a late hour.

There was a pensive silence after that, everyone seemed lost in thought. The dread that was muted today came back with a vengeance, and I started to fidget, 'I think I am going to be sick'

"Well, for now, eat then go rest. I will have Pippy ready your room. You can go check on Peter early in the morning. If you don't find him, go ask Dumbledore. Maybe Peter is doing some work for him." James said with a light smile but it was clearly faked and strained. Because why would Dumbledore ask Peter for work when he knows Peter should lay low as well?

I of course had a very good idea where Peter was, but I didn't have a way to tell them. Sirius sighed heavily. Pippy popped in with a food tray and put it in Sirius lap. He started eating and chatting with James about some lighter topics. They both tried to keep up a smile as they spoke but they both looked tense. Lily has been silent since the conversation about Peter ended. I could feel she was in deep thoughts. After a while, she picked me up and went into my room upstairs. She put me in my crib and took out her blood magic equipment.

It included a knife with some symbols engraved into it, a stone bowl and what looked like a reed pen. She picked up the knife first and cut a line across her left hand. She let her blood drip into the stone bowl as she chanted in some weird language. The blood kept dripping till it filled half the bowl and then the cut glowed softly and closed. Carefully she picked up the reed pen 'I think it is made from the same wood as her wand, they looked the same color' dipped it into the bowl and with a careful and stable hand started to write weird symbols 'runes, I think they are called' slowly as she started to write the symbols glowed a soft golden color. Slowly other symbols started to appear and glow, they are the symbols she wrote yesterday and the days before.

Lily had a determined, focused and resigned look in her eyes. Instinctively I knew she was going to finish her blood magic ritual today. I felt a deep respect for her and I stayed awake, fighting sleep to watch her as she worked. Lily worked into the early morning hours. She had to cut her hand to refill the bowl twice. She stayed in the same positions for hours, sometimes on the floor writing on it, sometimes standing writing on the wall. Slowly but surely, symbols were being written almost everywhere on the room surfaces. I really tried to stay awake but eventually my eyes fell closed.

I woke when I felt someone 'Lily' pick me up. She looked terrible; she was very pale -like chalk- and had dark bags under her eyes. She swayed slightly and slowly put me back down. She hunched her shoulder and held into the crib to balance herself, for a moment she looked about to vomit or pass out and she didn't seem about to get better. So I took a deep breath and screamed; "Paaapaaa" Lily flinched in surprise, her eyes opening wide, not just a moment passed before James and Sirius came running into the room, it looked like they just woke up. James took one look at Lily before he was quickly at her side picking her up bridal style, Sirius moved away from the door to let him pass before he went and picked me up too. Sirius took me and followed James into the Dining room. James put Lily into a chair and called Pippy ordering her to get two Blood Replenishing Potions. Sirius put me in the high chair and stood on Lily's other side at the ready, I watched as James supported Lily's head and coaxed her to drink the potions, he kept supporting her as the color, slowly, returned back to her. When he was sure she wouldn't fall over he moved away from her ,carefully, and sat in the chair beside her's. Sirius pulled took the chair on Lily's other side and moved my chair next to his own.

Food appeared in front of us and we all started to eat, I refused to let Sirius feed me but to my frustration I put more food on my front than in my mouth. I was feeling very hungry and eventually got tired of not being able to eat so I let Sirius feed me in the end 'just this once'.

After we finished eating, Sirius cast a cleaning spell at me and all the sticky baby food went away 'thank god'.

After taking the potions and eating Lily looked much better but she still looked very tired.

Finally, Sirius asked; "Did you finish the ritual?"

"Yes, it will use mine and James' sacrifice to protect Harry." Lily stated tiredly.

Sirius' lips thinned into a line.

"You don't know that. You won't die."

"We both know if anyone finds us, the dark lord will be the one coming himself." James said.

"And the chance of surviving against him is small." Lily said in resignation.

"Don't worry, no one will find you," Sirius said it confidently as he got up. "I will be going to check on Peter." And he went to his room to get ready.

James got up and picked me, balancing me on one arm before he went back to Lily and helped her get up. With his other arm supporting Lily, we made our way into their bedroom.

"Sleep Lily, I will watch over Harry while you rest." He told her, and Lily was too tired to do anything else but nod and flop into the bed. She fell asleep as soon as she touched the bed. With his free arm James pulled the covers and tucked Lily in. He moved out of the room quietly and we went downstairs to say goodbye to Sirius before he left.


Review Answers:

Luke Shadowrider

Thank you. I always thought it would be interesting to find a SI who isn't a fan of the show they get dumped into. I know my other stories don't give much hope since they haven't been updated for so long but I plan to finish this one first before I go back and continue the others so no worries about continuing. It is just I have been through some life changes and it is been a while so I don't know how to pick my other stories back up. I hope finishing this will give me the inspiration to continue them.


You're welcome :) Glad you enjoyed it.


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Thanks to those who who added my story to their favourite list; Darkjaden, Dendule95, FunestiNoctu121, Hyochi Nagara, LadyLunaTwilight, Luke Shadowrider, Pol Monte Blanc, Sticks Stones and S'mores, TaylorToons, alessia904, name-chan and skyjadeprincess