Unbearable
To an objective observer Sarah Williams was average.
She appeared no different to most other college students. She was reasonably intelligent, regularly gaining scores in the top 20% of her classes. She was attractive, had a handful of friends and the occasional casual boyfriend. She had a reputation as a loner. She wouldn't put up with idiots and rarely smiled which coupled with an eclectic and often dark wardrobe meant she was labelled by some as goth. But the whole campus was so chock full of diversity and most young people happy to embrace these differences which made it a non-issue. To sum it up there was nothing that marked her out as anything different, she was nice but nothing special.
Unfortunately, special was something she couldn't avoid even if she wanted to.
Sarah was destined for special no matter how much she tried to evade it. No matter how hard she tried not to think it. In fact, tried to pretend that special hadn't had her pinned between a rock and a hard place for years.
For example, Sarah tried to pretend that she hadn't had an otherworldly adventure at the tender age of 15. She pretended that she hadn't wished away her brother during a teenage hissy fit and hadn't almost lost a dangerous game of cat and mouse with a strangely alluring King of the Goblins. A creature that she was certain was a fae, that which research alluded to being disturbing and seductive, cherishing games and above all the chase and downfall of their opponents.
She imagined his furious ire following her run through the Labyrinth, probably directed at any poor little thing that got in the way. She had won her brother back and refused his blatant inappropriate advances. She'd proven her will was as strong as his and thrown his offer back in his face.
He must have been livid.
But to be honest so was she. She was damn furious with him for having meddled in their lives at all. Sarah pushed away such thoughts as her wishing also being somewhat at fault. Who the hell makes wishes thinking they will come true? Well who indeed?
She could reason until the cows came home that she hadn't really meant it. Or that she hadn't really believed that magic was real and therefore nothing would come of it.
But then there was the small matter of the book, the book that started it all. She'd been a naturally fanciful child and the book was gifted to her by some relative when she was young. It had fed her eager appetite for everything whimsical, different and fantastic. Beasts and creatures, castles and nobility, oh my!
She had lived so long in a little fantasy bubble and real life was too hurtful or simply boring in comparison. Her belief was deep and simply part of who she was so that even as kids her own age grew away from childhood fantasy, it remained steadfast in her heart. As much as she hadn't thought her wish would come true, an equal piece of her believed it would. And that held power, apparently, the power to summon him.
The trouble with getting what you wish for, disappearing brothers, different worlds full of impossible happenings, creatures and adventures and even a small amount of power, is that, you get what you wish for. There was no going back after that. You can't go home again they say and having tasted the otherworldly, literally the ripe seductive fruit of those damnable goblins, home was never again the same. Rosetti had been right.
Sarah returned home triumphant, yet it felt like the least successful victory in the history of the world. Sure, she had won her brother back and their freedom, freedom to breathe that New England air, to enjoy and fulfil her potential.
But it was easier said than done. She tried to live in the 'real world', what Hoggle had called Aboveground. She tried to live a normal life. Tried her hardest to appreciate what she could, when she could, but it was hard. Nothing was the same for her, and yet everything was clearly, painfully, the same for everyone else.
For a start the colours were always off, and she was always questioning her sanity. Had it happened, had it not? Why did the world look slightly askew? Was it her eyes?
No, she could say with certainty that it was not her eyesight, not exactly. Irene had taken her to the optician not long after, after she'd complained that what she was seeing wasn't quite right. They pronounced that she had almost perfect vision and put it down to migraines, because they can create that strange visual aura that either precipitates the blinding pain or accompanies it.
And boy did she get headaches, they came out of nowhere and no pain killer she tried, and she'd tried many, nothing had touched them. Nothing helped, except lying down in a darkened room and blocking out the world completely for a while. And rather nastily peaches too, just not for long.
It was as if the world had turned on its axis and the rest of humanity hadn't batted an eyelid. Sarah saw all, everything they did not. The strange shadows that followed her at times, the small creatures that darted in and out of alleyways and dark corners, and those eyes in the park that were always watching.
And then there were the colours, they weren't right either, slightly dull or muted and occasionally fuzzy around the edges. Even bright sunlight wasn't the right shade of yellowy gold and the leaves that should have been bright green looked sickly and off.
She knew it made her bad-tempered. She'd tried to adjust her attitude upon their return; tried to be friendly with Irene and was naturally happier to be around Toby and the family in general. But this feeling of languid wrongness tended to put her on edge and the battles within herself abounded. It was tearing her apart.
And then he came, again, because her life needed more weirdness. She worked hard not to overthink the terrifying implications, but it was difficult.
To begin with it was only fleeting glimpses, so brief that she questioned if it wasn't just her paranoia that likened every rock star wannabe and hoot at twilight to that royal bastard. But there were only so many times a sighting of a barn owl on campus at proximity to herself could be brushed off as nothing more than 'freakish avian behaviour'. That was how her roommate, a major of the veterinary sciences, had described it. Sarah had admired her use of the English language, and quietly snorted to herself because really, Emma had no idea how freakish it was. It was as ever a bitter morose bit of humour, but Sarah found opportunities where she could. If you don't laugh right?
The students with elaborate wild hairdos had also increased exponentially. Their faces were almost always covered by a hand, or someone else's head but it couldn't be normal. And they tended to gravitate around her routine as well, close to her classes or trips to the library or the supermarket.
It was nothing but emotional and psychological abuse. It was amazing that she managed to get any work done, as she spent half of her time worrying about when and where he might pop up next and what kind of revenge he must assuredly be plotting. Because as surely as she hated him for everything he had done to her she was certain he must have been mortified that she'd beaten him at his own game.
After all those mind games he was apparently ready to speak to her directly rather than stalking her in the shadows. But when he first appeared before her, it wasn't because she'd done any foolish wishing. That was strictly out of bounds, she wasn't that brave, or that stupid come to think of it.
She'd been invited to a party at some sorority house on the other side of the campus. She had her reservations about it, but Emma loved those Beta whatever's and Sarah had been persuaded to accompany her.
Plans were thin that weekend, her most recent date had made his excuses and Sarah felt another potential boyfriend slip away. It wasn't particularly upsetting, but it happened with annoying frequency. She just couldn't muster the energy to really care.
Once there Emma became scarce within 5 minutes, that happened with irritating regularity too. Why did she get dragged into these things when 9 times out of 10 her friend disappeared within a few moments and Sarah was left to her own devices? That was something she was used to, but it wasn't easy to find a peaceful corner in the din that carried on merrily around her. Nor was she particularly happy to just leave instead. Her friend was in there somewhere and Sarah felt a maternal responsibility toward her and whatever silly immature behaviour might ensue. Not forgetting dangerous, she wasn't naïve and far too often people could get taken advantage of at a party.
She could just about glimpse Emma's head bobbing around as she danced on the other side of the living room, she'd check in with her later.
It was the usual high-octane level of college get togethers, far too loud and slightly nightmarish. Faked dance floor smoke billowed around as well as the occasional whiff of something more potent. The noise and all that accompanied it was too much for Sarah and again she was left to question why she had bothered. Because it makes you feel normal, the voice taunted. She grimaced, it wasn't really working. All she ever saw was the sweaty bodies, the hormones hanging heavy in the air, everyone rubbing up against each other in what she assumed to be them enjoying some sensual atmosphere, but it did zero for her.
It wasn't like she lacked for attention. She was generally approached by 1 or 2 boys and sometimes a girl at these things. But as nice they might be, she had no interest in drinking herself into oblivion only to wake up next morning in bed with some random she barely knew. Sarah was proud of her staunch belief that a party was not a good place to meet an eligible other half, it was the place to get wasted and supremely embarrassed, or worse, mortified to find you'd shared something intimate with just the kind of person you wouldn't usually touch with a barge pole. To be fair while she'd had dates with well-meaning lads she'd met around campus it just hadn't gone beyond that. Sarah was more than aware that she didn't exude enthusiasm for many things, she couldn't find it within herself when everything was such grey monotony. It took everything she had to remain focused on her studies. Unfortunately, that meant they soon got the impression that she wasn't bothered, often thinking her too closed off or that she was seeing someone else. Some boys in her dorm had dubbed her the ice queen in a shoddy attempt to explain her lack of interest in them with issues she might have instead. She knew it ought to be hurtful, but she found she cared little, even enjoying the intimidation the mantle suggested.
And so, she found herself alone again, sipping a rum and coke, lounging around on the other side of the sorority's sizeable outdoor pool. It was quieter out here, less people nearby and the ones that were, were too interested in each other's tongues to realise she was there which was a bit nauseating, but fine. The peace only lasted 5 minutes, it was shattered when she heard two usually non-threatening words that shouldn't have sent a chill through her entire body,
"Hello Sarah."
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Re-edited Feb '19