(edited to add scene breaks)

"But Kim, Drakken is up to something serious! His getting rid of bendy straws was just a distraction! The Lil' Diablo toys are evil!"

Kim looked at her best friend in the whole world. Her typically laid back, supportive friend had been acting erratically lately. Well, more erratically than usual. He was stressed over a corporate takeover that was negatively affecting his beloved Bueno Nacho. She also thought that her new relationship with Eric bothered him. Since he had been totally supportive of her when she was crushing on Josh, that made no sense. Could it be that he was jealous of Eric because he suddenly now wanted to be her boyfriend? If so, then was it too much to expect that he would have said something? It had never occurred to her to date him, well, mostly because he was too 'safe'. But if he would have said something before she started dating Eric, she liked to think that she would have considered giving him a chance. Dammit, they needed to spend some time together and just talk things out, but there had been no time in the last few weeks. Was it her fault that she wanted to have a freakin' normal life for her new boyfriend and the prom and her schedule was booked solid?

"Ron, please, let me have this one night off. They are just little toys. We have GJ and the police to protect us, let them handle it tonight. Look, tomorrow is Saturday, we'll spend the whole day together and figure all this stuff out, OK?"

"All this stuff, KP?"

"Everything. You, me, what we are doing, who we are to each other. Everything. Even Bueno Nacho's getting rid of bendy straws and those stupid little robot toys. But please, Ronnie, let me be a normal girl this one night. Tomorrow I can handle 'never be normal' if I can just have this one night as a normal girl. Please?" green eyes pleaded.

"OK, sure. Tomorrow then KP," Ron turned and walked out the doors of the gym looking like she just kicked his mole rat.

She watched him leave, wanting to scream in rage at the heavens at the unfairness of it all.

"Is there a problem, Kim?" she jumped, startled as Eric came up behind her with two cups of punch.

"No, not tonight, I refuse to have problems tonight, Eric," she replied taking the offered drink. 'I need to be around more guys than just Ron to get used to how they move,' she thought, 'Ron wouldn't have startled me, I know how he moves. I mean Eric is just a guy, right? A hot, intelligent, funny, athletic guy with the deepest brown eyes...,' her thoughts derailed as she looked at her date for the prom.

Hearing a slow song starting up, he bowed with a goofy grin and murmured, "My Lady, may I have the pleasure of your company for this dance?"

"Please and thank you, kind sir," she returned his smile. Her earlier irritation was banished by his warm eyes and the grin that seemed a little familiar somehow. She put down her glass, took his hand and was swept into a fairy tale.


STD 2018—

"OK, Rufus, gather up the troops and follow after me when you can."

"'Kay!" Rufus scaled the twelve-foot wall and scampered off in search of his contact.

Ron had managed to lose the Lil' Diablo toys that had been pursuing him, his scooter wasn't exactly fast, but they were only about six inches tall and there teeny-tiny legs couldn't keep up even when they deployed tiny wheels.

Wade had really wanted him to stop at the Possible's house and talk to Kim's dad about the little toy robots because the older Possible was more knowledgeable about that technology. Ron refused because being at Kim's house tonight would be too painful because she was going to tell him tomorrow that they could only be 'ordinary' friends from now on. Plus, he knew that her father didn't exactly approve of him while he had heard from Tim and Jim that Mr. Dr. P. liked Eric.

All worries considered, he figured that the first dozen years of the "Kim" stage of his life were over and somehow, he would have to move on to the next stage in his life. He had heard that the cherry blossoms at Yamanouchi were pretty in the spring. He decided that his one last Middleton mission would be to get to Bueno Nacho headquarters as soon as possible and uncover Drakken's plot. Not necessarily stop it, without Kim, he would have no chance against Shego, but expose it to the 'proper authorities'. The usual route to get to the headquarters building would be to hop on the highway, but he knew a much shorter way by the lake that was more 'scooter-friendly' and would get him there faster.


STD 2018—

Drakken chuckled and rubbed his hands together in glee.

"Shego! Everything is going to work this time!"

"Sure Doc, just like the last dozen times...," the dark-haired mercenary snarked.

"Oh, you mock now, but just wait and be amazed." Pointing at a monitor he tapped on a keyboard and the Middleton High Prom came into view as he continued gloating, "See, Kim Possible is dancing the night away in the arms of her perfect guy, synthodrone #901. The buffoon just stopped by and tried to warn her about the Diablo toys, but she told him that she wanted to be a "normal girl" for prom night, that they could talk about it tomorrow, and he left in defeat." Switching the monitor over to the Stoppable home and then the Possible home, he gloated, "the buffoon is off crushed and probably crying in a gutter somewhere, he didn't go to his house, or her house and," the monitor changed to a view of a highway, "he hasn't been spotted heading in this direction. If he does show up tomorrow, it will be too late!"

"You mean you lost him?"

"Well, yes, but who cares if you lose a loser?"

"What about Global Justice?"

"Ha! Funny thing about them. They have gotten so used to Kim Possible discovering our plots, that the analysts whose job it was to try to track us were reassigned." The supervillain gloated.

"So when does the balloon go up?" When that got a blank look from her boss, she tried again, "You know, 'pull the trigger'? Oh for Pete's sake, Dr. D., when do the little robots stop being toys, turn into giant robots, and start taking over the world?"

"Shego, you know I'm not up on teen-speak!," checking another screen, he continued, "The final software update will be compiled and tested within the hour. I can then transmit the software update package and after another thirty minutes I can switch my global transmission link from data to power and the world will soon be mine! Except for Greenland, of course, you can have Greenland..."


STD 2018—

Kim was pressed up against Eric, her arms wrapped around his hard body, the sensual smell of leather teasing her senses. They had left the prom in time to get her home by the agreed upon 10 PM. Kim had popped into the bathroom and swapped her heels and elegant long skirt for sneakers and tight jeans, leaving the skirt and heels in her locker. He had swapped out his tux jacket for a leather one. Riding on the back of his motorcycle was the perfect end of the perfect prom date. Eric was, in her totally biased opinion, the hottest guy there; Bonnie and Brick were clearly put in their place as second-tier.

Even leaving the prom was a triumph, it was pretty early in the evening, so everyone was there to see them leave. Naturally, they had to cut along the edge of the dance floor so everyone could see Kim with her Club Banana designer jeans selected to showcase her long, muscular legs and Eric's leather biker jacket cut to highlight his lean, athletic build. Even in non-formal clothes, they clearly outclassed the other couples. The food chain might be stupid and petty, but being number one still felt good.

"Kim?" Eric's voice came over the intercom built into the motorcycle helmet he had given her to wear, "I called your parents and told them we'd be a bit late."

"Late?" Kim felt warm and drowsy, "We aren't going straight to my house?"

"We still can if you want, but I thought we could pop up to the lake to watch the moon rise over Mount Middleton. Is that OK with you? Your Dad said you didn't have to be home until eleven-thirty."

"Sounds perfect, Eric," the redhead purred, the thought of stopping at a well-known makeout place on the way home sent a sensual frisson of anticipation up her spine. This night was turning out to be better than she could have dreamed. Maybe tomorrow she would tell Ron that she was going to become a 'normal' teenage girl and just turn over the whole hero business to him and Wade. Those two, along with Rufus, could take care of saving the world...

Laying her head on Eric's muscular back, she closed her eyes, 'just for a second'.


STD 2018—

Ron came to the edge of the tree line behind the Bueno Nacho headquarters. A large dish antenna was rising up on an expanding tower and he could see the dish turn as if looking for something.

"Looks like as good a place as any to start," he said out loud and then felt foolish because Rufus was still gathering reinforcements and was not here. He used what little stealth he knew to get past two cameras, through the chain-link fence, and into a small building containing what he figured was the high power radio signal amplifiers and antenna control circuitry. Seeing a data port he plugged in his Kimmunicator.

"Wade, You're plugged into the satellite equipment thingy. Do you see anything?"

"Holy cow, Ron, I'm seeing U.S. Government Top Secret markings all over the code that is being transmitted. It's been compiled, I guessing that Drakken is loading an executable version of stolen code into something."

"Maybe those little toy robots?" Ron guessed, "is this enough to get GJ or someone out here?"

"It should be. I'll inform DOD, GJ, and Secret Service. I can't stop it remotely with this connection, it's a data monitoring port. Do you see any other ports?"

"Not that I have a Kimmunicator cable for, Wade. I see some cables that look like data cables, maybe I can pull them out and plug them in backward."

"Give it a try and then get out of there, someone is sure to notice if the data goes bad and will come out to fix it. Good luck Ron."

"OK, Wade, change the cables then run like hell works for me, I'm no hero."

Ron looked at the various cables and found three ribbon-like ones similar to the ones he had seen in Wade's computer. Pulling them out, he reversed the plugs and reconnected them. The one and only time that Wade had let him help with a computer build, he found that while you weren't supposed to be able to plug a cable in backward, it was doable, you just had to push really hard.

"Ron! The data is definitely all messed up" cheered the voice from the communicator.

"Wade, I'm going to take a quick look for a self-destruct button just in case there is one and then I am outta here."

"I don't know Ron, hurry, you might not have much time..."


STD 2018—

An entire column of status indicators changed from green to red on one of Drakken's screens.

"Dr. D.!? what are those?"

"Just a data corruption alarm, my dear Shego. Not to worry, there is so much error correction and redundancy used in the data stream that the Diablos will be able to reconstruct a correct copy of the software they need using the data they already have. It will just take a few minutes longer. Still, I'd better have someone check the transmission shed, maybe a squirrel or something is chewing on a data cable."

"I'll check it, I'm not doing anything anyway," offered Shego.

"No. You stay here. Too much high voltage in that room, we'll send some synthodrones," Drakken clicked on the window labeled 'synthodrone deployment spreadsheet'. Before he could reassign any of them, a red phone lit up.

"Eric, my boy! How's it going? I saw your performance at the prom, you were marvelous! ... At the Lake, good, good... She passed out before you had a chance to do anything? Hmm. Must have miscalculated her weight or something when I fixed the drugs for her. Sorry, my bad! Well, go ahead and service her anyway then, make sure to be a little extra rough so she will feel it when she wakes up. I want her to have no doubt as to what happened. Then come back here, it's getting close to time to 'pull the trigger on the balloon' as the young folk say." He hung up the red phone, highlighted the entries for five drones on the spreadsheet, and used a pull-down menu to select 'Transmitter Shed'."

"You're going to rape the princess?" Shego stared at the mad scientist in astonishment.

"Of course not Shego, I'm not a monster! Synthodrone 901 is going to do it. Just think of the total humiliation, not only does she fail to stop us from taking over the world, but any doctor that looks at her is going to find syntho-goop instead of semen inside her!"

Shego broke out into a hearty laugh, "Doc, you are a genius!"


STD 2018—

Eric spread a blanket down on the grass out of sight behind some shrubberies and laid a limp Kim on it. Removing her helmet, he put it back on his bike. The helmet had a drug-infused liner that provided the vapors that had rendered the young heroine into her current state of unconsciousness.

Because she wasn't supposed to be totally unconscious, only compliant, he pulled out his phone to report in and ask for instructions. After calling in, he put his phone back in his pocket, pulled off her sneakers, unbuckled her belt and was starting to tug off her jeans when he felt a strong yank on his ankle. Internal warning messages cascaded across his vision as he quickly lost all internal pressure. The pressure was lost so fast that he didn't have time to react. His syntho-goop wasn't just leaking, it was being sucked out...

"LENARD! NO! BAD LENARD! BAD! WE DON'T BITE HUMANS! SPIT OUT THE LEG!" (auto-translated from hisses and clicks)

"BUT ROACHIE! IT'S NOT A HUMAN, IT'S MORE LIKE A JELLY DONUT! COME TASTE THE FILLING!"

Rufus saw a cockroach with the mass of an elephant sucking on the leg of what he hoped was a synthodrone, its eyes closed in complete insectoid bliss. Roachie came up and the first one politely passed the leg over to it for a taste. A third came over and started sucking on the other leg after biting off the foot at the ankle.

Rufus ran over to check on Kim. She was asleep and wouldn't wake up. He knew he couldn't wait, Ron was depending on him. But he didn't want to leave her here totally undefended. Not when the deflated body of this synthodrone suggested that there were more around, in his experience, Synthodrones were like, well, roaches. He also knew that Kim would seriously freak if she woke up to find a giant cockroach watching her. Roachie was his only choice. Not a very good choice, but the only choice.

"Roachie!" squeaked the little hero, "Stay here. Guard this female. Follow us when awake. Tell others follow me."

"SWARM! FOLLOW THE RAT! HELP THE GOOD HUMAN!"

(General hissing and clicking as the dozen giant cockroaches voiced their acknowledgment.)

Rufus hopped on the lead cockroach and using a pair of feelers like reins, guided it down the path that Ron used. Within seconds, the swarm had scurried out of sight, the only evidence of their passing was crushed and trampled vegetation and the continuing sound of small trees snapping as the multi-ton bugs followed Rufus, all hoping for more of the humanoids with the tasty jelly filling.


STD 2018—

Drakken, who had been staring at his displays, suddenly broke out in a big smile, exclaiming, "Thirty-six percent of Diablos have reported back as software updated successfully and ready for power! That's outstanding Shego! Better than in my wildest dreams!"

"I don't know Doc, that seems kind of low to me..."

"Not at all, first, there are a million of the little toys scattered all over the world. I can afford to have a lot of them fail. Second, there are a few more that successfully downloaded the software but their reply signal didn't get picked up. Right now, they don't have much power. But I can fix that!"

Giving actions to his words, the mad scientist typed a single command on a console. The building lights dimmed and a deep hum was heard coming from the back of the building.

"Going to be a heck of an electric bill", his dark-haired partner teased.

"Not at all, in thirty minutes, the Diablos with the strongest connection will be able to go live and connect to the local power grid to finish charging. Within an hour even the poorest connected units will be online looking for local power. To be safe, we'll transfer to the Nebraska lair in thirty minutes. We'll run command and control from there. The authorities are bound to figure that this power broadcast is up to no good. If nothing else, the interference from the power transmission has jammed all cell phones in a fifty-mile radius." Pulling up his synthodrone spreadsheet he saw that three of the five were off-line. He highlighted another dozen of the synthodrones and sent them off to the transmission shed.

"Shego, can you go check the transmission shed, three of the synthodrones are off-line. Perhaps something larger than a squirrel is messing with the cables. I've sent more, but you'd better have a look."

"Sure thing Doc, be right back."

"And Shego?"

"Yeah?"

"Be careful, the main power busses are black, but that is an anti-corrosion coating, not insulation. For all practical purposes, they are bare wires. And do hurry back, this location is bound to get Federal guests here sooner or later."

"Gotcha Doc, any squirrels I find, I'll just toss them against the black bars going to the antenna.


STD 2018—

Kim's head pounded and she felt a bit groggy. Sitting up, she was trying to figure out why her jeans were partially off and where Eric was when she looked up and gave a little shriek of fear and surprise. There was a huge bug, a cockroach the size of a large dog looking at her. The adrenaline rush blew away her grogginess. Struggling to pull her jeans up so she could get up and run (damn designer skinny jeans!), she noticed that the monster was tilting its body to the side. Its eyes somehow grew impossibly larger and its hideous mouth quivered. Stunned, she realized that it was doing the monster bug version of her puppy dog pout! Something clicked in her mind, she knew this bug, only it used to be a little smaller...

"Roachie, is that you?" she said softly.

The definitely non-flickable bug did a little dance with its back legs making its butt wave around, it was wagging its tail! Definitely Roachie. Still disgusting though...

"Roachie, what is going on?"

Looking down where the monster that Ron had once declared "fun-sized" was staring, she saw the remains of Eric. Eric, the obvious ex-synthodrone, who was now totally drained of syntho-goop. She had been falling in love with a guy who wasn't even human! She had even kissed him! Once again, she wanted to scream at the heavens in rage. Surely a 'normal' girl would have known immediately that he wasn't a real guy, probably by the taste of his lips or something. She swore that the next guy she was interested in she was going to have Tara 'taste' him first.

Still affected by the drugs, her mind was crowded with random thoughts. Was she saved by some sort of Syntho-vampire? Why had Drakken sent a synthodrone to date her? Was this related to Ron's fears about the little toy robots? How long would it take to find Ron and go check out Drakken? Where did hottie artificial humans fall on the food chain? Roachie interrupted the jumbled thoughts bouncing around in her brain with some hisses and clicks, then took a step towards a path leading into the woods and stopped.

Putting her sneakers on and forcing her mind into mission mode, she stood up and asked, "Do you want me to follow you?"

Soon she was running full speed down what looked like a freshly cleared, smoothly packed trail. Worry that Roachie was taking her to a Ron in trouble crowded all other thoughts out of her mind.


STD 2018—

Ron had known that he was in trouble and would have run away screaming except that the synthodrones were between him and escape. Still, he had dropped three, his standard mission load for Drakken included two box knives and the ground was slippery with the syntho-goop from their slashed bodies. With the three older models down and two apparently new and improved models still going strong, he allowed himself a glimmer of hope. A dozen synthodrones joining the fray snuffed out that glimmer. The cream-poop icing on the crap cake that his life had become was the snarky voice he heard from the dark-haired woman pushing through his opponents;

"So, sidekick. Chewing on wires hoping to get some street cred to go work for Squirrel Girl now that Kimmie has kicked you to the curb to take up housekeeping with Eric?"

Motion in the tree line caught his eye. Rufus was here! Now if only he could survive the next thirty seconds... He tried to calm his mind and be ready for one good strike. Something in the way she said 'Kimmie' sent shivers down his spine. Kim was in danger! He had to break through and get to her! Could it be Eric? Nah, Eric thought Rufus was cool...

Believing that Ron staring past her was a ruse, she stepped in with a roundhouse kick. Her intended victim, at the same time, leaped in with a double whirling strike. Closing the distance took a lot of the force out of her kick, and he put a deep gash on Shego's face, slicing all the way to her cheekbone with one knife but the other just grazed her chest, slicing through her bodysuit and down into the fabric of her bra, but barely scratched her skin. Enraged, she delivered a plasma boosted uppercut knocking the boy into the shed. Following him into the shed, she lifted him up by grabbing his shirt with one hand and flaring the other hand with a short plasma flame.

"Maybe," she snarled, "you need a beauty mark to match mine. No, I think yours needs to be bigger, because that's just the kind of giving person I am," as her plasma flame burned a wide path from his chin up to the side of his head. The stench of burning hair, flesh, and bone was sweet perfume to her enraged soul, his screams music to her ears

Feeling the ground vibrate, she dropped the screaming young man and turned to see massive creatures advancing toward the shed, their hideous mouths dripping with saliva at the thought of the tasty, tasty treats in front of them. Figuring that the title of Queen of Greenland would be of no use to a dead woman, she fled.


STD 2018—

Kim was racing along the path. She had heard the snapping of trees and brush getting louder, so they were getting closer to... something big? The sound stopped and she heard Ron scream. She had heard him scream before, but this was no 'scream of courage', this was raw, primal agony. She reached inside herself and increased her speed, now desperate to get to her best friend before it was too late. Roachie picked up his pace and outran her.

She nearly stumbled and fell when she rocketed out of the tree line. Skidding to a stop, she saw that giant cockroaches had trampled down a chain-link fence and had swarmed a transmission shed, one even starting to climb the tower apparently in pursuit of a synthodrone. Most were sucking on the limbs of synthodrones and one was trying to wedge its way into a transmitter shed. She saw that one reach up and bite black bars running up the back wall.

A bright flash lit the area with the shock wave from explosion knocking her down.


Next Time on So The Drama: 2018 "feels"

"Drakken and Shego have probably already left, Wade. Find them."

"Already ahead of you there, Kim. I have most of the state covered by an experimental short range, low altitude radar network using hijacked personal Wifi routers. I've tracked them leaving the area. I think they are headed to the new lair that Drakken has in Nebraska."

"Get me a ride to Nebraska, Wade. I want to leave as soon as I get Ron to Middleton General. Call Mom and tell her I am bringing in Ron with a serious head wound. Pack a .380 for me and I need as many of the P rounds as you can get. Time for civility is over."

CREDITS

All characters are the property of the Disney Company. This is a work of fan fiction.

Authors Note: This story is the result of a short exchange with Mindless Violence Fan and is fueled by generic Twitter Rage. It was not beta or otherwise reviewed before publication. I feared my usual team of smart story writers would have me coming to my senses. :)

This is not the story I really want to work on, that story is the tale of Jim, Tim, and Thora becoming a team and Carlynn & Sigbjorn struggling with what real love is. But, Twitter Rage. Still, this story should satisfy the legal requirement that every Kim Possible fan fiction writer is required to have a version of So The Drama.