Category: Alternate Universe/Out of Character/Extremely Over The Top
Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author-mama4dukes. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.
This story was originally published by mama4dukes on Tricky Raven on December 12, 2015.
The Rabbit Meets the Magic Stick
And now our story comes to an end…
"I can't believe that the theme for homecoming this year is 'Back to the 80's'," Jake said.
"I can't believe we joined the dance committee again." Paul shook his head in disbelief. It was his idea, not Jake's, to join it. He still had no idea what he had been thinking at the time.
"Yeah, but you're the idiot who actually suggested the glittery stars this time. How could you do that to us?"
"I had to contribute something!"
"So, you had to pick the most tedious project from the last dance we went to?"
Paul shrugged his shoulders. "I thought it was a good idea." He finished cutting out the first star and punched a hole at the top for the string. "At least we know how to make them."
"True. They're still a pain in the neck, though." Jake thought of the four hundred ninety-eight stars they had left to do. "Why did you tell them we knew how to make them?"
"Because we do." Paulsighed,and glumly said, "I can't believe Bella didn't join the Dance Committee with us."
"Well, she didn't like it when we did it in 1987."
"And the Dance Committee meets at the same time as the Yoga Club."
"Why the hell aren't we in the Yoga Club? Our imprints are in tight yoga pants in the downward dog position as we speak, and here we are cutting out cardboard stars."
"The hell if I know. I thought for sure they'd do the Dance Committee." Jake grinned. "We can always ask our imprints to show us what they learned later."
Paul gave his friend a pat on the back. "Yeah, now that's more like it." He grinned at Jake. "And we can join the Yoga Club after this dance."
"And? There are dudes who do yoga. My dad goes to the yoga class at the tribal gym with my mom." His head snapped up at Jake. "Wait a second! Your dad teaches the yoga class that my parents are in."
"Yeah, at least that's what my dad told me."
"Huh, you learn something new everyday."
"You're not kidding about that," Paul agreed.
Two months ago, before he had been sent back to the past, Paul would never have imagined that he would be sitting in a gym cutting out cardboard stars and discussing life with Jacob Black, of all people. Back then, his life had been bleak, and he had absolutely no prospects in his life. He had basically been living his life day-to-day, hour-by-hour even, and had never looked forward to the next day nor had he ever imagined his life ever improving. But improve it did. One trip to the past changed his future completely, and now he couldn't wait to wake up in the morning and see what adventures the day brought.
Since waking up to his new life, his life has been happy and filled to the brim with activities. Just last month, his grandmother had taken Jake and him to Seattle to film an ad campaign for BellaPop's new skin care line geared towards teen and young adult males. The ads began running last week and sales were flying through the roof, making Jake and Paul instant celebrities. They got absolutely no sympathy from Bella, who simply told him, "Now, you know how I feel."
When he asked Aunt Molly why they didn't choose Quil to be spokesmodel, she replied, "Honey, I love my grandson with all my heart, but the boy didn't inherit any of my good looks. Clearly, Isabella inherited all of the Swan family genes. Now, Jacob and you, on the other hand, have that classic, clean-cut look that girls love. I knew you'd drive sales through the roof."
A few minutes later, Bella snuck up on him from behind and gave him a kiss, ending Paul's flashback of the last few weeks.
"What are you doing here? Yoga isn't done yet, is it?"
"I decided to have some sympathy for you and help you with the stars."
"Thanks." She set a box in front of him. "What's this?"
Paul carefully peeled the tape off of the box and looked inside. He smiled as soon as he saw what it was. "Jake, Bella saved us. Look! She brought us glittery, cardboard stars, and they're pre-strung."
"Cool. Where did you get these?"
"Amazon. Thirty dollars for a box of five hundred. My dad ordered them using his Prime account. He claimed that you two had no idea what you were getting yourselves into by suggesting glittery stars."
"Oh, thank Taha Aki." Jake sighed with relief.
"Taha Aki? No way, this one is all on Chief…I mean Dr. Swan," Paul said.
"I'll help you hang the stars up. There's a catch, though," Bella informed them.
"Apparently some of the dads are performing their Thriller routine at the school dance."
"We're going to be the laughing stocks of the school!" Paul cried.
"Who cares? It makes them happy. Besides, what other kids can say they have such awesome dads?"
"This is true. I suppose it's minor compared to the way things could have been."
Bella smiled at her friends. It was true. All their lives had improved a hundred fold since returning from their trip to 1987.
"Hey, we're done now. Let's go for a drive and grab some dinner out; otherwise, I'll be forced into eating Tofu Casserole for dinner."
"Great idea. You drive, Jake. I hate driving."
"Awesome, my Rabbit is still purring like new. I still have no idea who fixed it up, by the way."
"I still think it was a vampire. Who the heck sprays sparkly, red paint on a car?"
"So, what if it was a vampire? He did a good deed. Besides, I have a soft spot in my heart for this car," Bella said. "If it weren't for the Rabbit and the Magic Stick, the three of us wouldn't be friends."
So Bella, Jake, and Paul hopped into the sparkly, red, re-vamped Rabbit and took off on their next adventure together. For the rest of the their lives, the three friends would always bring peace, happiness, and balance to their little world in the Olympic Peninsula. After all, that's why the spirits put them there.
Just one last thing…
Knock! Knock! Knock!
Jasper Whitlock ignored the constant pounding on the front door. He didn't want to see anyone. He didn't want to talk to anyone. He just wanted to be left alone in his pit of depression so he could…
Crash! Boom!The sound of the front door being kicked in interrupted his thoughts. When he looked up to see who broke down the door, he was given a swift slap across the cheek by one Charlotte Whitlock.
"Ow! What was that for?"
"Stop wallowing in your self-pity. The twit wasn't even your mate!"
"Yeah, but I loved her."
"You didn't love her, she knew exactly how to manipulate your emotions so you thought you loved her," Peter informed him. "Now, come on, let's go."
"I can't go anywhere. I have no control. I nearly drained Edward's human girlfriend. She had to be changed because of me."
Peter tapped his chin with his finger and did some thinking. "Yeah, it wasn't you. It was Edward's bloodlust that made you lose control. Besides, Edward needed to change the girl or the Volturi would have come down hard on all of you for consorting with a human. What the hell was Edward doing messing around with a human girl anyway?"
"He wanted a mate. Actually, this was his second attempt at dabbling with a human. The first girl was the heiress of SwanPro Beauty Products and the BellaPop line. She had just moved to a town called Forks, Washington on the Olympic Peninsula."
"Yeah, I know the place. Quaint little town. Char and I had some business to take care of there in 1987."
"We moved there over the summer because Alice saw in a vision that Edward's mate would be moving to Forks at the end of the summer. Alice predicted that Isabella Swan would be a meek and subservient girl, depressed about a boy she had dated in Arizona when she started at Forks High School.
"Yep, just the way the little egomaniac likes them," Peter remarked angrily.
Jasper nodded his head in agreement. "Edward would pick up the pieces and she would fall hopelessly in love with him. She would also supply Alice with a plethora of BellaPop products for free. So, we packed our bags and relocated to Forks so Edward could meet her, but once the girl got there, she wanted nothing to do with him. In fact, she was completely repulsed by him, which was a first. She wasn't meek or subservient, but rather mischievous and snarky with absolutely no reservations about speaking her feelings. Anyway, something happened in the cosmos to change Alice's visionbecause Isabella Swan picked up a new boyfriend almost as soon as she arrived in Forks. In fact, Alice caught them making out in a supply closet at the high school on the first day of school. Edward, in a desperate attempt to win over the BellaPop girl, cut the brake lines on some poor kid's van."
"Why would he place a human boy in danger?" Charlotte asked angrily.
"Alice told him that the van would careen towards Bella. Edward would save her by inserting himself between the van and the girl. The girl would then be eternally grateful, and her father would thank Edward on his knees for saving his daughter's life. It didn't work out that way, however, because at the very last second, Bella's boyfriend pushed her to safety and Edward ended up saving the boyfriend instead of the girl."
Peter and Charlotte clutched their stomachs and cackled with laughter.
Jasper continued his story. "So, we all moved quickly from Forks to Medina, Washington. We started attending the high school there. That's where Edward met Emma, who was all broken up about some boy who had dumped her. Emma and Edward became inseparable in no time. A couple of weeks later, we had a birthday party for her, and she got a paper cut while unwrapping one of her birthday presents. Ironically, it was the new BellaPop eyeshadow palette she was opening. She started bleeding, I smelled the blood, started feeding from her, and Carlisle had to change her. When she woke up from her change there was a commercial on TV for BellaPopBoy and she started screaming that her life was ruined because, apparently, the boy who dumped her was one of the spokesmodels for BellaPopBoy, and she would never be able to win him back now that she was a vampire. Ironically, the BellaPopBoy is Bella Swan's new boyfriend."
"Oh, him," Charlotte gushed. "Is he BellaPopBoy Naughty or Nice?"
"BellaPopBoy Naughty. He's actually a very nice kid named Paul," Jasper replied before concluding his story, "Anyway, Alice told me that she would never forgive me for hurting her best friend, and Rose said that she would never forgive me for not draining her completely. That's it. That's what happened. Alice wants a divorce."
"I don't know what you're moping about, Jasper. All of this worked out in your favor. You didn't like the Cullens anyway," Peter reminded him.
"So, chin up, buckaroo! Let me tell you about our next great adventure."
"Alright, what do you propose we do?"
"First, we're going to fix your front door."
"Second, we're going to wait here for Emmett and Rose. They'll be here tonight because neither of them can stand Emma."
"Third, the six of us are going on a grand adventure to Italy."
"What kind of an adventure?"
"We're going to Italy to save your mate."
"Yep, your mate. She's a hot, sexy thing, too. She's human, but knows about vampires."
"Alrighty!" Jasper hopped right up to his feet. "When do I get to meet her?"
"Right after we take out the Volturi."
Jasper cracked his knuckles, nodded his head, and said, "We can take them."
"That's the Major I know," Peter affirmed encouragingly, giving his friend a pat on the back.
A few days later, after the Volturi were mysteriously wiped out, Major Jasper Whitlock married his sexy Italian mate Gianna and ruled the vampire world with Peter, Charlotte, Emmett, and Rose by his side for the rest of eternity.
With the demise of the Volturi, balance was brought back to the supernatural world. Wolves and vampires alike lived in peace forever and ever.
...and they all lived happily, ever after.
NOTE FROM MAMA4DUKES: Thank you for joining me on this journey to the past and back to the future. Out of all of my stories, this particular one holds a special place in my heart. In July 2015, I had the pleasure of visiting Forks and La Push with two of my sons. While I loved the quaint, little town and all it had to offer in terms of outdoor adventures (we got to go hiking and whitewater rafting there), I was struck by how reduced circumstances were in both towns. After researching some of the history of the area and talking to the residents of both Forks and La Push, I became aware of how the decline of the timber industry greatly affected the once thriving area.
Another thing I learned during my visit is about how the Quileutes are a kind, loving, and caring people. An older woman in La Push commented on how refreshing it was to see two brothers getting along so well. My two boys were bundled up in their rain jackets and running around on First Beach in the pouring rain. She mentioned how most teens seem engrossed in their electronic gadgets rather than in the simple pleasures of life. We got to talking some more and I learned that she was widowed. I told her how sorry I was, but she told me that I shouldn't be sorry for her. She had an entire community that was her family. She was proud of how Quileutes supported each other and made sure that no one went without. Soon, we parted ways, but she truly left an impression on me. She had such a positive outlook on life and I realized that I can take a page out of her book and simply appreciate what I had been blessed with instead of always wanting more.
Meanwhile, I had a tale to write. I began the story prior to leaving for our tour of the Pacific Northwest, and during our visit to Forks, I ended up scrapping everything and re-starting it. I turned my original one-shot into a long, multi-chapter story in which my three heroes gradually developed hope and became empowered enough to change their own dismal circumstances with the knowledge that they had family and friends who loved them. Of course, the story eventually became The Rabbit Meets The Magic Stick.
Now, to my readers, I didn't want to end the story, but I had to so I will be adding outtakes to it. Chapter 31 marks the end of the story, but I will be tacking outtakes onto the end of the story. I already have two outtakes ready so make sure you hit subscribe so you receive alerts.
Thank you so much for joining me for The Rabbit Meets the Magic Stick.