I'm reworking this one and posting more chapters.


"Bella, you better behave yourself this year."

Scoffing, I look at mom like she's certifiably fucking nuts. Every single year she drags me up to the mountains to attend the Annual Summer Swan Family Reunion, and every single year, she does something embarrassing. Her. Not me. Never me.

I'm 23 years old, and she still treats me like a child. I have and always will hate that.

"Where's dad?"

Mom and dad are divorced, but for some reason unbeknownst to me, she still attends this shindig every single year.

"I'm sure he's around here somewhere. Probably off with that hussy of his."

You know those parents who co-parent like fucking champs. Well, yeah, that's not mom and dad. They absolutely hate each other. Another reason why I haven't a clue why mom insists on coming.

"Sue's a nice lady, mom. You should try to be nice to her."

Now it's her turn to scoff, and boy, does she do it better than me. "I'm going to find your grandmother."

She walks off, leaving me to stand alone in fallen pine needles and dusty dirt. Scanning the wooded area, I look for a familiar face - one I can actually tolerate. When my eyes land on my cousin Rosalie, I quickly look away, praying to all that is holy she didn't see me.

God, if you're listening…

"Bella!"

I knew I shouldn't have stopped going to church.

Please forgive me, Father.

"Bella!"

Goddamit.

Giving in because really I have no fucking choice, I smile and wave so huge and fake. I could win an Oscar for this performance. "Rosie Posie, hi," I say as she wraps me up into a ginormous hug, suffocating me with her floral scented ass.

"It's been so long," she says, and it takes a miracle to keep my eyes from rolling to the back of my head.

It's literally been a year. I saw her last year at the Annual Summer Swan Family Reunion.

"It seems like it was just yesterday," I say, and she just giggles herself silly.

"Oh, Bella. You're a hoot. Come on. I have someone I want you to meet."

I do another scan of the woods, searching for someone - anyone - to save me from the clutches of Rosalie. Of all the people, of all the Swans, it had to be her who landed in front of me.

She stops in front of my favorite cousin Delbert. Yes, his name is Delbert. I think Aunt Mary was drunk off her ass when she popped him out, but man, is he a riot.

"Where is Edward, Del?"

He turns his head toward me, those magnifying glasses of his making his eyes bulge unnaturally, and grins. "Little Bella, you made it!"

"Hello, Delbert," I say, genuinely happy to see him.

"Del," Rosalie says, again, irritated now. "Where is Edward?"

"I don't know, Rosie Posie. Probably went to take a piss or something."

"Oh! There he is!" She grabs my arm, digging those claws in deep. It takes me stomping on her foot for her to release me. The yelp of pain is just a bonus.

"There was a bug on your shoe," I say, making Delbert laugh.

"Oh," she says, eyeing me like she doesn't believe me.

Where's the trust?

When she turns away, Delbert high fives me, but then good God am I distracted when Edward walks up. He is fucking hot. My eyes move to Rosalie and then shift to Edward before moving back to Rosalie. She smirks at my wide eyes and the drool leaking from my lips.

Rosie Posie landed herself the God of all the gods in this place we call the universe?

Who?

What?

When?

Where?

Why?

How?

"Close your mouth," Delbert stage whispers out of the corner of his mouth, and my mouth snaps shut, but when Edward's emerald green eyes crinkle, I no longer have control of any part of my body.

"Edward," Rosalie says, linking her arm through his and pulling him in close. "This is my cousin Bella. You've already met Delbert. Bella, this is Edward. My boyfriend."

Are you shitting my dick?

"Hey, what's up?" Edward says, his voice so deep and raspy, I feel a tingle in my no no square.

"The sky," I blurt, stupidly, making Delbert snort unattractively.

Edward chuckles - attractively - and gives me this look. You know the one. Where he's checking me out - down, up, then back down, and my body feels like it's about to explode. I do what any normal woman would do when getting sized up. I walk the fuck away because fuck me do I want him to fuck me with that voice. Just stick it in and sing.

"Bella!" Rosalie calls from behind me, but I ignore her, hightailing it out of there.

I search through the faces of Swans and Blacks until I find dad sitting on a log with Sue on his lap.

"Bella," dad slurs, smiling like a drunk. "You made it!"

I kiss his sweaty head and say hello to Sue then watch as Delbert parks his ass at my side, slipping a cold brew into my hand. What a fucking saint. I pop the tab and drain the entirety of its contents.

"My, my, ain't you all grown up."

"Dallas." I spit, crushing the can in my fist, imagining it's his big red-headed ass. "Fancy seeing you here," I say through clenched teeth, trying to be civil when all I want to do is throw him off a cliff.

Dallas is my perverted cousin by marriage. He's Delbert's step-brother, and I despise his ginger fucking ass. I haven't seen him in years, and distance does not make the heart grow fonder. If anything, I wish for him to be over yonder - way yonder in them woods getting eaten by a black bear.

The last time I saw him, his tongue was in my mouth, and I was trying to climb him like a tree. The only problem - he's not tall, so basically I was trying to hump a stump. Anyway, mom had walked up, screamed like a banshee and yelled at me. She yelled horrible things. Things like incest and cousin fucker and dear God, pray for her mutilated soul.

He's not even of blood relation, but that didn't stop me from wanting to find a priest to perform an exorcism on me.

Cleanse me of my sins, Father.

Dallas is staring at me, licking those thick lips of his, and I just threw up in my mouth a little. Okay, a lot.

"It'll be nice catchin' up with ya later," he says with a wink, and I throw my can at his head before grabbing Delbert and running away.

"Like eww, Del. What's he doing here?"

"Mom invited him."

Aunt Mary's going down.

"Bella!"

I have never hated my name so much in my life.

"Yes, Rose," I say, trying to be patient, but patience is nothing but a pain in my ass.

She steps in front of me, thwarting mine and Delbert's escape. Edward's right next to her, eyes on me which sends a spasm to my crotch - a pussy shock, if you will.

"Lunch is being served. I want you to sit with us."

I stare at Edward, at the scar on his eyebrow, wishing I could fuck it. Delbert shoves me with his shoulder, and I jerk out of my dirty thoughts and try to focus on Rosalie. "What?"

"Lunch, Bella. Eat with us."

"Fine, okay," I say, but what I really want is Edward to eat me.

Oh God, now I'm imagining it, and Edward's actually licking his lips like he can read my thoughts which makes me lick my lips and then he licks his again which makes me do it again.

It's a vicious fucking cycle.

"Bella! You're not even listening!"

"What?"

Geez, can't a girl fucking daydream.

"I said that you can share mine and Edward's tent tonight."

What the fuck?

Share a tent? With her and Edward? What am I missing here?

"Huh?"

"Yeah, it has two bedrooms," she says. "You and Dallas will be in the second one."

"Hold up. What? You're fucking crazy if you think I'm sharing a tent with Dallas."

"Bella," she says, all patient like she's speaking to a small child. I may be small, but I'm no child, and I'm certainly not going to get mauled by my red headed step cousin tonight. I'd rather fuck a tree. "He asked to room with you."

What the fucking holy perverted shit is going on here?

"Rosie, no way," Delbert says, my savior. "She doesn't want to."

"I thought it would be nice." She actually pouts, and I've never wanted to hit someone more than I want to hit her right now.

"You thought it would be nice?" I ask, narrowing my eyes at the stupid cunt. "What would be nice about that? I don't understand."

Edward's watching me, those green eyes of his smoldering, and I preen like a fucking peacock under his stare, but then of course Rosalie ruins the vibes by continuing to speak.

"He's nice, Bella. He likes you."

"Delbert, dear, make me a bird, so I can fly far, far away from here."

Edward chuckles, and I take a step toward him before Delbert grabs my hand and whisks me away. I stumble over rocks and pine needles and trip over branches, but my eyes never leave Edward's as he stares after me.

I think he wants to fuck me.

"You've lost it," Delbert laughs.

"What? Did I say that out loud?"

"Yes."

"Oh. Well, it's true. Did you feel that eye contact?"

He shakes his head and pulls me to a stop next to Aunt Mary.

"Bella, love, how are you?"

Placing my hands on my hips, I stare Aunt Mary down long enough for her to look confused enough to ask Delbert what's up my ass.

"I have a bone to pick with you!"

"What's wrong?"

"Dallas. You invited Dallas! Do you not remember what happened a few years ago?"

Aunt Mary giggles herself stupid. "Oh, Bella. That was so long ago. He's a nice boy."

Shaking my head, I give up. I say hello to Uncle Henri and Uncle Al, preferring this company over any others. Although, I could use a hamburger or two. I'm fucking starving.

"Here ya go, Bella. I brought you one of them weiners from the grill."

A giant sausage dog is placed in front of my face, and I scream bloody murder.

Later that night, when the air is cool and the branches sway under the moonlight, I share a log with Delbert and roast some marshmallows for s'mores. Rosalie and Edward flicker in and out across the flames, and I can't help imagining shoving Rosalie into the fire, so I can hop onto Edward's lap and ride his log. It'll be just like Splash Mountain - only wetter.

Pulling my burnt marshmallow from the flames, I grab my graham crackers and chocolate and smash it all together. After my third one, I tell Delbert I can't have another.

Dad and Sue are cutting up a rug on the makeshift dance floor while mom glares daggers at them both.

All in all, it's been an alright day.

"Let's dance," Delbert says, pulling me up and leading me to the dirt.

We two step around dad and Sue, giving them a run for their money. Mom eventually can't take another second of sitting on the sidelines, so she grabs Dallas - of all people. It's short lived when he palms her ass and she slaps the daylights out of him.

She stomps off, and he tosses me a wink, making me nearly regurgitate my s'mores.

When Rosalie walks by, chasing after Dallas, I watch the two of them really fucking confused.

He's saying something to her, and then she's saying something to him, and then he's speaking some more before she's stomping her foot like an upset mare. They walk away in the same direction. Together. In the deep, dark woods.

"Can I cut in?"

What the…

"Sure thing," Delbert says, backing away, but I squeeze the life out of his hand when he tries to leave me.

He can't leave me alone with Edward! What if I embarrass myself? What if I try to hump his leg or something?

Don't you leave me, my eyes say.

Let go of my hand, Delbert's magnified ones glare.

No!

Slowly our fingers separate as Delbert pulls further and further away, my hand remaining outstretched like I'm about to lose my long-lost love.

Don't leave me, Delbert. Don't you dare say goodbye.

"Bella."

I startle at the sound of that deep, smoky rasp, and when I look into those emerald eyes, fuck Delbert.

Delbert who?

"Yes?"

Edward pulls me into his arms, but this is no two-step. His arms wrap around my waist, and I plant mine on his chest. He's moving us all sexual and slow. He's so turning me on right now. I claw at his chest a bit, making him gasp. Instead of apologizing, I do it harder, and he's like owe, fuck, which makes me release him like a hot potatoe except he's no spud and I'm not craving any starch. What the fuck am I even going on about?

Lifting my head, I expect to find him all disgusted with me, but no, he's far from disgusted if the lust in those eyes is anything to go by. What an animal!

"Where is Rosalie?"

Who cares, Bella!

"She went to the bathroom."

With Dallas?

"Let's go find her," I say, grabbing Edward's big hand, and God, it's so big. He laces his fingers with mine, and that little devil on my shoulder is whispering fuck him, girl. Fuck him real good, and just when I'm about to listen to the little minx, we stumble into the woods and find Rosalie squatting with her pants around her ankles.

"Ayyyeeeeeee," she screeches, standing up so fast she falls on her bare ass in the dirt. I'm laughing so hard, I nearly pee my pants. Rosalie is rolling around on the ground, trying to get her pants up, but all she's accomplishing is getting dirt in her crotch and in her crack, and Edward's chuckling as he tries to pull her up.

I run away, so far away, ignoring the little devil shouting at me to fuck him, girl. Fuck him real good.

"Rosalie's right there, you idiot," I shout to no one.

I wake up to loud groans and hissed whispers, and completely horrified, I pull the blanket over my head. That should be me right now. I should be the one getting pounded on the tent floor. I should be the one crying over the bruises on my ass from sharp rocks and broken twigs, goddammit.

Closing my eyes, I imagine him on top of me, his hands in my hair as he slides his thick - yeah, there's no way it's anything but thick - cock inside of me, and when Rosalie moans Dallllllasssssss, so do I - wait, what!

Sitting up, I throw the blankets off me and crawl to the zipped opening that separates the two-room tent. And yeah, I took Rosalie up on her offer, but Dallas wasn't supposed to be here!

Slowly, oh so slowly, I unzip the zipper and peek my eyes through the opening. My eyes are deceiving me, it's the only thing that makes sense because if not, then that's Rosalie sitting on ginger cock. This can't be.

Incest, I want to yell.

Cousin fucker, I want to shout.

Save her soul, I want to pray.

But Dallas isn't blood relation, and Rosalie can fuck him all she wants - even if it is a sickening thing to watch.

So sick.

Sick.

Slowly, oh so slowly, I zip that zipper back up, cringing when I hear Dallas hissing, Yeah, right there. Ride that there cock real good, Rosie Posie. Make it come, make that there pretty cock come.

I about lose my dinner when Rosalie purrs back, oh Dallas. God, Dallas. Dallas. Dallas. DALLAS. God, you fuck like a God.

What the fuck, Rosalie? This is some Hills Have Eyes shit up in here.

Crawling from the tent, I fall onto the dirty, hard ground, scrambling to pick myself up and get the fuck away from this torture session. After dusting myself on and slipping my shoes on, I walk around the campground, refraining from patting my leg and calling Here, Edward. Come here, boy. Come to mama.

A lot of Swans and Blacks are still awake, sitting by the fires, drinking and laughing themselves stupid.

My eyes zero in on Delbert just before they spot Edward sitting next to him. I make my way over, and Delbert raises his glassy eyes. "Little Bella, hey. I thought you were asleep."

"I was," I say, glancing at Edward's godly face. "But I woke up. Had a nightmare."

More like a wakemare.

Edward pats the log next to him, and I take a seat inhaling woodsy pine and hot as fuck man. Delbert hands me a beer, and I drain it before asking for another. I don't say anything about Rosalie and - barf - Dallas, but I have suspicions that Edward knows what Rosalie's up to anyhow.

When Delbert wanders off to bed, I scoot closer to Edward, whispering, "Hi."

He looks down at me, and I grin like a maniac. He chuckles and leans closer, and I pucker my lips because oh my God, he's going to kiss me, but then he lifts a finger and rubs my cheek. "You have chocolate on your face."

What the fuck, Bella!

I slap a hand over my face, humiliated as shit right now. He's never gonna want to kiss me if I can't even keep my face clean!

"Let me see," he says, all calm, cool, and collected. Like he didn't just embarrass me.

I hold my hand tighter and shake my head. He tries to pry my hand away, but I'm freakishly strong and give him a run for his money. He laughs, using both hands to finally move it away. "It's gone," he says, touching me. "I was going to lick it clean for you."

Wait, what!

"Rosalie's getting railed by Dallas," I just blurt out like a reckless cunt before slapping a hand over my mouth again. "Oh God," I mumble. "I'm sorry." I'm not sorry. "Oh God."

Edward chuckles. "I know."

Wait, what!

"You know? You don't care that your girlfriend is fucking her cousin?"

"It's not her cousin," he says, defending the cousin fucker.

"Practically," I say, choosing to ignore that my tongue's touched his tongue once before.. "Close enough."

"She's not my girlfriend."

"But…" I run a shaky hand through my hair, trying to calm my racing heart and pulsing clit. "She said you were her boyfriend. You acted like you were her boyfriend!"

He nods, smirking. "She was trying to make you jealous."

"Why in the world would she want to make me jealous?"

He shrugs, giving me an accusing look. "Because she loves Dallas." What, like he thinks I was stealing Dallas away from her!

"Excuse me? You just said Rosalie loves Dallas."

He nods, and I stand so quickly, I nearly biff it right over the log - not Edward's.

Rosalie loves Dallas.

She loves Dallas.

Rosalie's in love with out perverted, ginger cousin Dallas!

I've never been so baffled - disgusted - in my life, but then something more important registers in my brain.

Edward is not Rosalie's boyfriend.

Edward strokes a hand up my thigh.

He's not her boyfriend.

Edward is not her boyfriend!

His hand inches higher as he looks up at me, standing above him like I'm so goddess about to get her shit rocked. "Come with me."

"Oh shit, you're so fucking sexy," Edward rasps, hefting me up into his arms and pushing my bare back and ass against rough tree bark.

I'm going to have bark burn in the morning, but who gives a fuck, am I right?

Edward's condom covered cock is rubbing against my entrance, making me squirm and wrap my legs tighter around his waist.

"Kiss me," I gasp, and he slams his mouth onto mine just as he shoves his dick all the way inside me.

I bite his tongue, and he grunts, shoving me higher up the tree as he thrusts inside me like a savage. It hurts but it doesn't and even if it really did, I want to feel him inside me for the rest of my life.

He releases my lips and bites down on my neck before licking across my breasts and sucking a nipple into his hot mouth. His hips drive faster as his lips suck harder. I thread my fingers through his thick hair, chanting fuck, fuck, fuck over and over.

When he pulls out, I growl but then he's ramming back inside me and making me scream.

Distantly, I hear what was that and was that a coyote and then get yer gun, Melvin, and the only wish I have before getting put down like a rabid animal is an orgasm by the cock of Edward.

"Fuck," Edward says, releasing my sore nipple with a sexy pop. "Do they really think you're a coyote?"

I half laugh, half moan, growling, "Don't stop! For the love of God, do not stop!"

He fucks me fast and hard, so fast and hard, I feel blood dripping down my back and into my crack, but it's worth it. So fucking worth it. "They're coming. Oh my God, they're coming," I pant, clawing at the back of his neck.

He pauses his thrusts and tightens his arms around me, shuffling us onto the other side of the tree. Flashlights beam through the woods, and the only thought I have as Edward's cock pounds into me is, are those fuckwits really hunting a coyote?

What the fuck?

"Look at that there blood there," Dallas says, and if I had a cock, it would be deflated right now.

Edward's eyes sparkle in the moonlight as he slowly pulls out and slams roughly back inside, making a noise escape my throat - like a purr but deeper.

"Wait," Dallas says, shushing everyone. "Did ya hear that?"

Edward's lips cover mine as he continues to fuck me into a tree. One hand squeezes my scraped up ass while the other finds my clit and flicks it, making me yelp into his mouth.

"I think there's a pup out there. Listen!"

Edward continues to rub my clit, and I squeeze my legs tighter, hoping I don't sound like some coyote pup looking for her lost mother. But anyway, I'm about to come all over him, and it's going to be fucking glorious.

He pumps his hips faster, rubs his finger harder, and I explode with a muffled cry into Edward's mouth.

His thrusts get sloppier, and my body shakes with the power behind his fucks, and when he finally comes, he roars into my mouth as he comes inside me.

"That ain't no pup, Dal. That there's a wolf."

These fucking people!

By the time Sunday rolls around, Rosalie is flaunting her perverted ginger all around camp. Delbert is just as shocked as I was with these turn of events.

I don't see the appeal, but love is blind as the person who said that said.

"Bella, your mom's looking for you," Dad calls, and I wave as he gets into his truck with Sue and drives off.

Arms wrap around my waist from behind, and a cheek nuzzles against my neck, making me purr like a bad kitty. "Give me your number," Edward says, nipping at the tender skin.

I hand him my phone, and he grinds his dick into my ass as he punches his number in, calling his phone before handing it back.

He turns me in his arms and kisses my lips, all soft and tender before I'm turning into a savage whore as I try to suck his soul straight from his body. He groans, and I lift a leg, trying to climb him like a tree because he is tall, but then stupid Delbert walks up, yelling, "Get a room, fuckers."

"Delbert," I groan, putting my foot back on the ground. "Go away."

"No can do, Little Bella. Mom and I are riding down with you."

"I have to get going anyway," Edward says, and I grip him harder. "I'll call you. I want to see you again." He licks his lips and arches that scarred eyebrow.

Reluctantly, I let him go when what I really want to do is push him against a tree and fuck him with my mouth.

"Okay," I say, and he kisses me one more time before walking his fine ass away from me.

I sigh, longingly, and Delbert wraps an arm around my shoulder. "Let's go find our moms, lover girl."

"Oh, Delbert. You saw him. He's so fucking hot, and he fucks like a…"

He smashes a big hand against my mouth, making me laugh.

When we get to one of the last trailers left here, Delbert pulls open the door, him and I both screaming like banshees when we catch mom sitting on Aunt Mary's face.

Mom fucker, Delbert yells.

Incest, I shriek even though it's not.

Sister fucker, Delbert screams.

Cleanse their mutilated souls, I pray, and Delbert slams the door.