Now, at this exact moment, Remus has a startling realization. He was not born knowing what he realizes now, which is the typical start for those involved with Fate. If Remus had, he would have been able to avoid the hard lessons he was forced to endure. For poor Remus had only now realized a key fact of his life as he lay here. Fate was determined to keep his life balanced. Equal. To never see joy and happiness reach far enough to outweigh the dark. 'But what exactly does this mean?' you might ask. Well, we shall learn as Remus now does - by looking back on his life.
Remus was born in the year of 1969, to his loving parents Hope and Lyall Lupin. He was instantly loved and grew into a sweet and charming young boy. Life was wonderful for the three of them. Little Remus used to say, much to the joy of his parents, that every day was his best day. And it was this, Remus now thinks, that attracted Fate's attention. All was well in his life. All was well, that is, until Fate decided to get involved. Weeks before his fifth birthday, the infamous werewolf Fenrir Greyback broke into the Lupin household and attacked the young Remus. Remus survived the attack but was now a full-fledged werewolf. His parents, worried for their son's safety, removed the boy from the public and their eyes, and moved into a small home away from town. And thus began the fifth worst day of his life.
The fourth best day of Remus's life happened in 1976, during his sixth year at Hogwarts. His sixth year was the year of realizations. It was during this year that he realized Sirius's constant dates bothered him. He told himself it was just because he was concerned for his friend- he didn't want to see him hurt. However, exactly two months, five fights, and one screaming match later, Remus realized it was more than concern he was feeling for his friend. After trying to hide this newfound realization for a month, he had another realization, this one even larger: he didn't want to hide it anymore. So, after help from a glass (or two...okay three) of firewhiskey (or as Remus liked to call it 'liquid courage') Sirius too had a realization. And that is exactly how the fourth best day of Remus's life came to be- because on December 10th, 1976, Remus had his first date with Sirius.
Fate was not about to be undone, oh no. For her retaliation, we fast forward -20 years forward. And now Remus is running after Harry, fighting Death Eater after Death Eater. It's dangerous, but he takes comfort in the knowledge that Harry will soon be safe and Sirius is safe at headquarters. The two people he cares about most are going to be alright. So, he breathes easy, and his heart is light as he battles the evil before him. Until he seems him. Sirius. He was there. Fighting in the open. And as Remus fights off the final Death Eater in front of him, ready to run to Sirius, he sees her. Bellatrix. There is no reason for it, but immediately he feels dread settle in his stomach. He knows something terrible is about to happen. He wants to run forward, run to Sirius and spirit him away before anything worse can happen. He can do nothing though as he stands paralyzed. He stands there and sees the events unfold. Sirius is laughing when it happens. He is hit by Bellatrix's curse, and falls into that damn veil. Remus immediately knows he is gone; he can feel it. The absence is tangible in his soul. He grabs Harry as he runs forward, desperate to keep the last one close to him. But inside he breaks. And so, on the fourth worst day of Remus's life, he loses his best friend and first lover, after getting him back a mere two years previous. He curses Fate for her cruelty.
Fast forward a year and a half. Remus knows this day will be making the best days list, for this is the day he marries Tonks. He had laughed at James during his wedding, for his nerves and worried expressions. He had thought of him as slightly silly, for what could he have to be nervous about? Now Remus understands. He understands fully. For the third best day of his life is spent with nervous pacing, shaking hands, and frantic thoughts - until he sees her. Remus thinks, no, knows that she is the most beautiful woman he has ever seen. It is the clearest thought he has had all day. Some may have questioned his choices, marrying Tonks so quickly, especially after Sirius's still recent death. It is in this, Remus knows, that the others are clueless. After Sirius's death, Remus was broken. Shattered. Tonks has been the one who picked him up and held his broken pieces until he could himself. It seemed inevitable to him that he would fall in love with her. Still, he resisted for some time, scared of his effect on those he loved. Yet there he stood, to be joined for time and all eternity to the woman he loved. And he couldn't be any happier.
As Remus reflects on his life, he now realizes that this happy day of his was a type of payment. The reasoning behind it he is not sure of. Perhaps Fate had been remorseful. Whatever the reason, Remus now acknowledges that it was the equal side to an unfortunate event that happened during his fourth year at Hogwarts. He had been in class when the notice came. His dear mother, who always loved him despite his 'disease,' who always took every opportunity to make him smile, had suddenly fallen terribly ill. And not even two days after this dreadful news, Hope Lupin passed away, her body too weak from the sickness to fight. Remus never even had the chance to say goodbye. Remus guesses it only seems fitting that as Fate took away his mother, the strongest woman in his life, he would later find a new strong woman in his life. So, the third worst day of his life was balanced.
There is one memory from his childhood that Remus holds above all others. Until recently, it had held the spot for the number one best day of his life. This day would be September 1st, 1971. The day he boarded the Hogwarts Express for the first time. It was this glorious day (which, at this point, had already fulfilled all his dreams and wishes) that he would meet the three boys that would forever change his life. It had been the dream of his life for as long as the little eleven-year-old could remember to meet other children and have friends for the first time. Real friends. His parents weren't cruel by keeping these things from him before now – they truly loved him and were worried for his safety. They hadn't known what else to do. But all in all, it made for a very lonely Remus. Looking back now, Remus knows what young Remus didn't. He knows that within thirty minutes of entering that compartment of laughing boys, he would have found his best mates. If he said or acted strange in any way they never commented on it. They simply welcomed him in with open arms. And Remus learned to trust and love his friends. Current Remus looks upon this day with great fondness. Even knowing what Fate throws in response, he would never trade this memory or experience for anything.
Maybe it is that exact determination, determination to fight against Fate and protect that memory, that shows the love he still holds for his friends. But it may have also been ammunition against him. For what Fate delivered on that rainy October day in 1981 was truly spiteful.
The past few months had been hard, as Voldemort and his followers continued to rise in power. Suspicion and distrust had begun to set in, even amongst the marauders. Remus knew Sirius, and possibly even James, at times suspected him as a spy. He had been ashamed to realize he at times thought the same of them. He had hoped their friendship and strong bond would hold through those rough times. Then, the terrifying news. Even now, years later, it stills turns his stomach. The Potters were being hunted by Voldemort himself. James, Lily, and little Harry were in danger, and Remus was sick with worry until they went into hiding. He had thought that they would be safe, that that would be the end of it. But Fate had never been too kind to Remus. So on that Halloween night, James and Lily were struck dead by Voldemort. Upon receiving that news, Remus had fallen to the ground sick. It was almost worse to him, to know Harry had survived, as the ministry would never have let him keep the little boy. Unfortunately for Remus, Fate wasn't done yet. Because not even two hours later, it was reported that Peter was dead and Sirius was to be taken to Azkaban. Remus didn't want to believe it, but he wasn't given much choice. And that was how, within a mere twenty-four hours, Remus lost all four of his best friends. He lost his family. And he was alone, for the first time in nearly ten years, knowing full well that this was, and would forever be, one of the absolute worst days of his life. He spends the next ten years of his life with little joy, always afraid of it being ripped from him again.
As Remus mulls overs all these thoughts, he realizes one amazing day he had overlooked in his review. The best day of his life. April 16th, 1998 – the day his son was born.
Remus had been terrified when he found out. The only thing he could think was of his own lonely sad childhood, and he had known without a doubt that he would hate himself if his son had to go through what he did. If he was being honest with himself, he was scared. Full on, panic mode, hands shaking, stomach churning scared. What if he wasn't good enough, what if his bad genes had passed on? What if, what if. But when he held his son for the first time in those shaking hands, all of that fell away. All that mattered was this little boy he held, and the feelings of joy that spread throughout him, a particular experience that only comes with becoming a parent. Remus's world had changed that day. Everything in his life had realigned - with little Teddy now at the center. And Remus couldn't be any happier. He smiles now, at his remembrance of that particular memory. That smile stretches to a grin, as Remus once again realizes something. Something important, some huge: he won. And as Remus waits for his entrance to the next life, he is not sad, not weeping, for those he left behind. The last day of his life had been a happy one, for he died knowing his son and the others he loved would live on. The future of the wizarding world would be safe. Remus died happy because he died protecting those he loved.
And as he finally opened his eyes on the other side, his wife by his side, the best day of his afterlife began. For before him stood James, Sirius and Lily, smiles on their faces and tears in their eyes.
Remus had beat Fate. He had died with happiness, the joy of it outweighing the darkness. Remus smiles. He won, and Fate would never take something from him again.
AN: Just an interesting idea that popped into my head. Hope it made sense. Thanks for reading and please review! – dam chosen one