Re:Zero: One Punch Knight
For 6 chapters the writing format wasn't good. Chapter 7 is when the writing format improved because I took a very long break from writing this story
The beginning was rewritten
There was a wolf class threat causing trouble in the new city A. Just like always, our bald hero arrived late to the scene. Mumen rider was already on the scene. He was easily defeated, sadly. Who was the monster that knocked out Mumen rider? There was some crazy fanatical person dressed in Black KKK outfit resembling a Cultist. He had unseen hands prying out of his back reaching out for anyone who dared stop him from finding the true Pride. He was searching for someone called pride?
Cultist- "I am the messenger of love! Get in my way of finding pride, and you'l get a taste of my Faith!"
The Cultist madman destroyed the newly constructed buildings with ease. Smiley man was then defeated. Stinger was then defeated. Now more heroes were defeated at encountering the Cultist freak. But a nostalgic bald head walked the streets being unaware of what is going on. He walked past the Cultist without caring at all.
Cultist- "That smell... THAT SMELL! It was you!"
Saitama- "Hm? Me? Did you just blame me for smelling bad?"
Cultist- "You're the one. I've found you!"
The cultist was slapped onto the the ground but didn't die. The caped baldy walked away being irritated by the KKK look-alike who just blamed him for having a bad smell. The cultist laughed to himself as he fazed into the ground.
Cultist- "He has the scent of love on him. He's the one..."
That day, Saitama didn't even get a reward for defeating the Cultist. In fact, nobody received the reward because the madman wasn't arrested. But then people came to the conclusion that the cultist was defeated by King. King was confused on live Television being asked questions by news reporters. King didn't know what to say but he acted the same as always. His silent stare would give everyone the impression that it was him who defeated the crazy person who attacked the new City A. It is thought that the cultist was probably a greater threat than wolf. Saitama then turned off the TV and went to sleep because there was nothing good on TV. Genos was cleaning the restroom silently.
The blond cyborg finished his task and went to see his master who's asleep. He didn't want to disturb his master so he decided to leave quietly. But then he detected a hostile presence in the environment. He looked straight to Saitama who was being dragged away by some unseen hands into a portal. Genos wasn't going to let his master be taken away so he pulled on Saitama's legs but just ended up being pulled with his master.
For some odd reason, Saitama and Genos ended up in Lugunica. There was a wide variety of races and species of people. Demi-Humans and regular humans. in some occasions there were humans with cat ears and tail but nothing too special.
"okay... what the hell is this place?" Asked Saitama. Genos replied with, "I don't know Sensei. The recommended course of action would be to ask a citizen for directions." The way the cyborg responded disappointed the the Caped Baldy. "Oh great, now I have to ask around? Sigh."
Re:Zero: One Punch Knight
The caped Baldy, accompanied by his fellow cyborg and student to try asking people questions. Saitama's baldness and strange outfit would make him too weird to talk to, Genos was too scary to look at. In fact, the cyborg would interrogate people. Saitama had to stop Genos from trying to hurt anyone.
Saitama- "If you keep this up, people might call the cops on us."
Genos- "I doubt this culture has their own police. however, from what I have observed throughout this day, this place doesn't lack it's very own justice system. instead of police, there are imperial Knights."
Saitama- "you could have shortened that sentence. you should have said we somehow ended up in the past. But anyways, how the hell did we end up here? I was asleep just a while ago."
Genos- "Very well. while you were sleeping I was observing."
saitama felt very uncomfortable at hearing this from his student.
Genos- "all of a sudden my sensors detected a hostile presence. I saw disembodied arms reaching for you while you slept."
Genos- "I attempted to defend you, but in doing so we both ended up here."
Saitama- "oh. that sucks. Hm... I guess we should find a place to stay. hopefully we can get superhero jobs."
Genos- "Sensei, allow me to depart from you. I will find potential job positions to fill. I will meet up with you later."
Saitama- "Yeah sure thing Genos. I'll be seeing you then."
The blond Cyborg leaped from building to building leaving the scene. anyone nearby was frightened by the bouncing cyborg. Now saitama is all alone in a crowd of people observing his bald head. the Caped Baldy didn't like this one bit and catched their attention.
Saitama- "none of y'all ever seen a bald person?! don't you have better things to do than stare at me?!"
"Uhh. it's not your head. it's your outfit."
Saitama looked to the reptile person who insulted his outfit.
Saitama- "Huh? there's nothing wrong with my outfit! I'm supposed to be a hero, that's why I'm dressed like this!"
after an awkward moment of silence laughter is heard from all directions.
He walked away from the still Laughing crowd of people into a restroom of female Demi-humans. Oh the embarrassment. After being chased away by angry demi-humans, he ended up entering a restaurant meant for Demi-humans only. The Caped Baldy was told to leave many times because throwing him out was impossible. for some reason he's an unmovable object. punching the Caped baldy was also a bad idea. The baldy went to a fruit shop but his money was useless, so he was chased away. Then he finally got some action. He saved someone from getting ran over by a Dragon-Drawn Carriage, nobody cheered for him, the person he saved wasn't thankful at all. Saitama's outfit was too funny. His bald head made him look even funnier. Being tired of all of The unwanted attention he decided to leave. Everywhere he went people just stared at him, it was getting too annoying for him. Left and right he couldn't find peace. Even ugly animal people laughed at him. With no more options he decided to sit alone in an alleyway. Going back into public wasn't worth his time. his money was useless, he couldn't even read, he doesn't know where the hell he is, people laugh at him nonstop, and to top it all off, Genos is taking too long.
Saitama- "Darn it! I'm supposed to be a hero. Why the hell was I dragged into this mess? Hopefully Genos found a place where I can work. Where is that cyborg anyways?"
Three Shadows appear. A tall strong man, a skinny smug teen, and a short scrawny kid. For some reason saitama thinks Genos found him.
Saitama- "Genos? Oh... can I help you three?"
Thug 1- "Cough out everything you have."
Thug 2- "Unless you want to get hurt."
Saitama- "Hm?.. What are you guys talking about?"
Thug 3- "Give us everything you have or you can die here."
Saitama was hoping for something fun to happen but was disappointed. After being laughed at by everybody, he wanted to punch something, he didn't care if it died with one punch. Maybe people would respect him more if he showed his awesome strength. But he didn't want to teach three thugs a lesson. He wanted a strong opponent to fight. Teaching these three thugs a lesson just isn't worth his time.
Saitama- "Can you guys leave? I'm waiting for someone. I can't be distracted so buzz off would ya?"
The three thugs are offended at hearing this. This bald weirdo isn't afraid of them at all. The Caped Baldy had an expression of "I don't give a f*" type of attitude.
Thug 1- "You think you're some hot stuff? Show us what you got punk!"
The tall thug punched saitama's face. The Bald dude just stood there. The punch didn't hurt at all. If anyone got hurt, it was the tall guy who threw the punch. He feels like he broke some bones. It's like Saitama's skull is harder than metal.
Thug 2- "This guy's head is a rock! Kill him!"
The Trio of thieves were getting ready to stab the bald guy. They thought his pathetic appearance would make him a wuss. Then out of the light, Genos arrived. Like a lighting bolt falling from the sky. The ground beneath him cracked for several feet reaching to the thugs. They were frightened by the demonstration of power and the artificial limbs Genos has.
Genos- "Sensei! I have arrived!"
The three thugs stare at the blond cyborg. Genos looks very intimidating. They almost shit their pants.
Saitama- "Oh hey Genos! what took you so long?"
Genos- "I was sidetracked, helping a child find her parents. But you seem to be in trouble right now. Are those three bothering you? may I eliminate them?"
Saitama- "Go easy on em. they can't hurt a fly."
Genos- "Very well, master."
Before one of the thugs could even surrender, the three of them were knocked out in a blink of an eye.
Genos- "How did I do, Sensei?"
Saitama- "I think you went overboard. Sure, no buildings were broken, but you could have at least taught them a lesson."
Genos- "Understood. Next time I will ease the approach."
Before Saitama could complain about being hungry, a girl (Obviously Felt) seemed to be in a hurry or running away from somebody.
Felt- "Get out of my way!"
The girl runs past them, not knowing she just stepped on Saitama's shoe.
Saitama- "Hey! That's not very nice! watch where you are going, Brat!"
She stopped at hearing Saitama's insult. She goes up to Saitama's face like a punk.
Felt- "What did you say baldy? If I wasn't in a hurry I'd beat you right here!"
Saitama- "Has no one ever taught you to respect your elders?! Apologize now!"
Felt- "I'd rather eat dirt!"
A silver haired half Elf entered the scene.
Emilia- "Give back what you stole and I won't hurt you!"
Felt realized she wasted too much time arguing with the Caped Baldy. She decided to quit her pointless argument and run away. The girl jumped on to a roof of a building then on to other buildings as well. The half elf quickly followed the girl as well as Saitama.
Saitama- "Come back here you brat!"
Felt looked back at the two chasing her. An angry bald man with a strange outfit and a Silver Haired half elf.
Felt- "What an idiot. No one can catch me."
Saitama popped out of existence and reappeared in front of Felt who is on top of another building. Emilia is still far behind but was frightened at Saitama's incredible speed.
Saitama- "Now apologize or I'll spank you."
The girl pulled out a knife in self-defense. She tried attacking Saitama but her hand was stopped easily.
Saitama- "I'm tired of being the nice guy! So i'm putting my foot down!"
Saitama stomped on the roof to show that he's serious but the roof caved inwards and they both fell into a restroom for female Demihumans.
"it's the bald pervert!"
All of the Furries slap Saitama. This obviously didn't hurt him but it successfully delivered the message. All of the Furries ran out of the restroom. Just before Saitama could decide to leave the scene, The half elf arrived via gaping hole in the ceiling.
Emilia- "You stopped the theif?"
Saitama- "This brat? Uh I guess..."
Emilia- "I presume she stole something from you as well?"
Saitama- "Not really. She just stepped on my foot. That's all."
Emilia- "That's it?"
Saitama- "Yeah. That's all."
Emilia- "Well... thank you for stopping the thief."
Saitama- "Yeah, whatever..."
As Emilia searched Felt's unconscious body, the thief mustered the strength to say a few words.
Emilia- "I suppose I should heal her."
Emilia began to heal Felt with her magic.
Felt- "I can't fail..."
Saitama- "Well... This has gotten out of hand. I'll be going now."
An Imperial knight blocked Saitama's path.
Reinhard- "Why are you scaring people and destroying property?"
Saitama- "Uh... I wasn't trying to."
The Knight scans Saitama from head to toe.
Reinhard- "I won't overlook this, you're under arrest."
Saitama- "Woah! Now hold on there! I'm not a bad guy, I'm a hero!"
Reinhard- "You? A hero? Jokes will get you nowhere."
The knight then looked at Emilia.
Reinhard- "Oh? Lady Emilia? What are you doing here?"
Emilia- "I was chasing this girl. For some unknown reason she stole my insignia, then that bald man stopped her. I owe him my thanks."
Saitama- "Ya see? I'm not a bad guy! Wait a minute. Why did you have to point out my baldness?"
Reinhard- "Then why were you terrorizing Demihumans?"
Saitama- "I wasn't!"
Genos arrived at the scene via hole in the ceiling.
Genos- "Master Saitama! Why have you ran off?"
Th cyborg observed the Imperial Knight.
Genos- "Master, is he a threat?"
Saitama- "No. He's a good guy don't worry."
Felt awakes completely. She then got back on her feet. She tried to leave but a flying cat blocked her way out.
Puck- "Where is the insignia? We won't have to hurt you if you comply with us."
Felt- "Get out of the way!"
Emilia- "There's nowhere to run. Give back the insignia."
The thief was on guard and backed away from Puck and Emilia.
Felt- "I'm selling this to Elsa Granhiert, So I wont be giving it away that easily."
Reinhard was surprised to hear this. It's not a good idea to tell people who you make deals with. (Screw it, plot reasons)
Reinhard- "You're making deals with her?! You're just digging your own grave by doing that. Right after she gets what she needs, she will try to kill you."
Felt- "What? That can't be true."
Reinhard- "I'm going to have to stop this deal from happening."
Felt- "Not if I can help it."
The Thief tried escaping but her feet were frozen to the ground so she cant run away. Courtesy of Emilia.
Felt- "Huh? Let me go!"
Emilia- "Sorry but Reinhard needs you."
Saitama- "Can I go now?"
Reinhard- "No. You have to pay for property damage."
Saitama- "I have no money though."
Reinhard- "Then you're under arrest."
Genos- "Stop. You're making a mistake by arresting Master Saitama."
Reinhard- "He's your master?"
Genos- "He's the one who saved my life. I then became his student, he is incredibly powerful. His abilities would be of great help to you."
Reinhard- "Is that so? Well then... I know what can be done."
Everyone looks at Reinhard.
Reinhard- "I want to watch Saitama fight Elsa Granhiert, The Bowel Hunter. If he wins, I will forgive his charges. If he looses then I'll step in and finish her off."
Saitama- "That's it? So then, where is this person I'm going to fight anyways?"
Felt- "He's going to get killed if he fights against Elsa."
The baldy went to Felt's face.
Saitama- "Just tell me where the Owl puncher is going to be!"
Felt- "It's pronounced Bowel Hunter you idiot!"
Emilia- "I want to accompany you."
Felt and Reinhard- "What?!"
Emilia- "I want to see the person who tried to buy my insignia."
Reinhard- "Lady Emilia. Are you sure about that?"
The cat flew up to Reinhard.
Puck- "Once she sets her mind on something, there is no turning back."
Reinhard- "Very well. Little girl. Take us to the Loot house."
Felt- "I have a name! My name's Felt!"
Saitama- "Enough wasting time! Let's go already!"
Reinhard's thoughts: "I have a hard time believing this guy could be some hero."
Front of Loot House
Felt lead everyone to the front door. Saitama, Genos, Reinhard, Emilia and Puck. Felt nocked three times.
"What's the password?"
Felt- "The jig's up. I've been caught."
The front door opens up. A tall old man who appears to be too strong for someone his age peaks through the door.
Old Man Rom- "Oh, I'm sorry for the trouble she has caused all of you."
Rom stares at the Caped Baldy.
Old Man Rom- "Well uh... Come on in."
The group entered the Loot House. They all were seated and nothing else was said. Old Man Rom decided to break the silence.
Old Man Rom- "Can I offer any drinks?"
Reinhard- "Sorry no. We are waiting for the Bowel Hunter."
The caped baldy jumps off his chair.
Saitama- "This Owl hunter isn't showing up! What the hell are we waiting for?!"
"Knock, Knock, Knock"
Felt- "It's her."
Saitama gets excited. Maybe he'll get a good fight. Or maybe not. Who knows?
Felt- "Come in."
The girl opened the door to allow the Bowel Hunter inside. The Bowel Hunter is fairly attractive. (Look up her appearance) She stares at Saitama's bald head then to Emilia and Reinhard. She then enjoyed her time staring at the attractive Blond Cyborg.
Elsa Granhiert- "Oh Felt... So you've been caught. Not only is the owner of the insignia here, but an imperial knight as well? And who is that fine young man?
She pointed at Genos.
Elsa Granhiert "His limbs seem to be artificial. Fascinating."
Saitama walked up to Elsa Granhiert.
Saitama- "Yo. Are you the owl puncher?"
Elsa Granhiert- "What?"
Felt- "I said it's Bowel Hunter! You idiot!"
Elsa Granhiert- "It seems we have a comedian here."
Saitama- "I'm serious. I'm here to fight someone. If you're the Bowel Hunter, then please show me how strong you are."
Elsa Granhiert- "Oh? That's it? Well, I am starving for a little blood."
She licked her lips.
Reinhard tapped Genos Shoulder.
Reinhard- "Will he be okay? He doesn't have a weapon to fight with."
Genos- "Master Saitama doesn't need a weapon. His fists are deadlier than any sword. Just watch."
Reinhard- "You put too much faith in him. He just looks... like a regular man."
Genos- "I also thought the same way, but I was in for a surprise."
Emilia and Rom were hearing their conversation. None of them believed Genos. Saitama would probably die.
Saitama- "Why don't we go outside to fight? This building is too small. It feels crowded in here."
Elsa Granhiert- "As you wish."
Reinhard- "Wait, I must watch your fight. Wait for me, so that I may observe you."
Outside (Open field)
Saitama- "Alright. You better not disappoint me. I don't want you to hold back. Fight like you're trying to kill me."
Elsa Granhiert- "I always kill when I fight. So don't worry." (She makes a malevolent smile)
Reinhard, Emilia, Puck, Genos, Rom, and Felt stand at a safe distance away from the fight. They are the spectators. They believe Saitama is definitely going to die. But Genos knows what Saitama can do.
Emilia- "How can you be so confident in that man?"
Genos- "Master Saitama has defeated giant monsters with one punch. He'll be fine."
Felt- "You're joking!"
The Bowel Hunter appeared behind Saitama in a blink of an eye. Nobody could see her move, except for Reinhard and Genos. Saitama poofed out of existence and reappeared behind his opponent. She was surprised with the speed of the Caped Baldy, so she retreated to a safe distance.
Elsa Granhiert- "How are you so fast? I couldn't see you move at all!"
Reinhard, Emilia and the rest were impressed by Saitama's speed. Only Genos wasn't surprised, he knew Saitama can move much faster.
Saitama- "Aw man, everyone who ever asked me about my abilities always end up loosing against me. You had my hopes up. You're probably weaker than I expected."
She didn't like hearing that come from some skinny bald dude. She's now pissed off.
Elsa Granhiert- "You think I'm weak? You'll be begging for death when I'm done with you!"
The Bowel Hunter ran at super Sonic speeds around the Caped Baldy. Saitama just stood there. His opponent felt very confident in her speed. She found a perfect opening for an attack. To her surprise, Saitama then looked at her face.
Saitama- "Can I go home now?"
She retreated back again.
Bowel Hunter- "What's with this guy? Why do I feel unsafe around him?"
Reinhard- "She feels unsafe around him?"
Saitama- "If you aren't going to attack me, then I'll go to you."
Bowel Hunter- "What?!"
The bald superhero popped out of existence and reappeared behind his opponent.
She turned around to stare at a fist that didn't even make contact with her face. But she did hear something get destroyed. She looked behind her to see a crater that stretched for miles, she also took a second to look at everyone's horrified faces. Genos just stood there with a smile. He had a feeling of Deja vu.
Saitama- "Now that we are done here, can we find some food? I'm starving."
Elsa Granhiert- "Wait!"
Before saitama could leave he is stopped by her.
Elsa Granhiert "How did you become so strong?"
Saitama- "Nah, even if I tell you wouldn't believe me."
Elsa Granhiert "You fool, why wont you take me seriously?"
Saitama- "Sorry but no. Besides, I can't let this power fall into the wrong hands."
Elsa Granhiert- "You don't think I can handle it baldy?"
Saitama didn't like hearing that. He turned around and look at her all pissed off.
Saitama- "Stop mentioning my baldness!"
Genos- "You are nuisance to Master Saitama. Leave now. Or I'll incinerate you."
Genos aimed his arm at the Bowel Hunter. His hand shape shifts into a massive cannon. The sound of energy charging up frightens everyone but Saitama.
Elsa Granhiert- "I wonder what your guts look like."
The female assassin disappeared from sight with the intentions of fighting Genos. She attempted to slice open Genos Stomach but nothing happened.
Genos- "You are a bigger fool than I anticipated. I am no human. I'm a Cyborg."
Everyone doesn't know what a Cyborg is. They make confused expressions.
Genos- "I'm not surprised you don't know what a cyborg is. Let me show you."
The blond Cyborg ripped his shirt off. His artificial body is seen. The spectators of the fight stare at the horrifying cyborg.
Genos- "More than 90% of me is a machine. I have long lost my humanity... So now that you know who you're up against, do you still want to fight?"
The cyborg's machine parts begin to glow and spark off electricity and steam as he stood in a fighting stance. Even from a safe distance, Reinhard, Emilia, Puck, Rom, and Felt could feel the heat of the Cyborg's immense power.
Elsa Granhiert- "So then, if I can defeat you, then that Baldy will have to take me seriously."
Saitama- "Hey! I didn't agree to anything! And didn't I tell you to stop mentioning my baldness?!"
The fight between Genos and his opponent happened very fast. Genos wasted no time and overpowered the woman. It was at this moment she realized... she screwed up. The female assassin decided to escape from the battlefield but Genos followed her easily.
Saitama- "That's enough Genos! She learned her lesson."
The Cyborg stopped chasing her.
Genos- "Very well."
The Cyborg returned to his Master like a dog would.
Reinhard- "I have to say... both of you have far exceeded my expectations. Saitama. That's your name right?"
The baldy looked at the imperial knight to give a proper response. his face went from bland to serious.
Saitama- "Yes! What do you need of me?"
Reinhard- "Is there a way we can keep in touch?"
Saitama- "Yo, I don't swing that way."
Reinhard- "You misunderstood me."
Saitama- "Oh... Then what do you want?"
Reinhard- "How can I make sure where to find you?"
Saitama- "Well, I'm kind of homeless at the moment. I'm also hungry. It makes me jealous of Genos because he doesn't need food to survive."
Genos- "That is true, however, since there isn't a nearby recharge station, I need to use solar energy to keep functioning properly."
Puck- "Does he do photosynthesis?"
Emilia walked up to Saitama and Genos. Puck relaxed on her shoulder.
Emilia- "As a thank you, I would like to offer you a place to stay. You can temporarily stay at Roswaal's mansion."
Saitama- "Really?! Um.. I mean, sure. I'll gladly accept. That should distract me from trying to find a job, at least for a little bit."
Reinhard- "There is one more thing I want to ask of you. Would you like jobs as imperial knights?"
Saitama- "Not really."
Genos- "Sensei. This is as close as you can get to getting a hero job."
Saitama- "Is that so? Then I'll join if Genos can too."
Reinhard- "Of course he can. However you both won't be acknowledged very soon. You need to prove your selves."
Felt tried sneaking away but Rom stopped her.
Felt- "Hey what's the big idea, Old Man Rom?!"
Old Man Rom- "you don't need that anymore, now please return that Insignia to miss Emilia."
Felt- "Okay! Fine!"
Felt pulled out the Insignia from her Secret pocket. the insignia would glow for some unknown reason. Reinhard quickly took notice. He grabbed Felt's arm. this made the girl very uncomfortable.
Felt- "Get your hands off of me creep!"
Old Man Rom- "Stop right there! I don't care if you are an imperial knight! Nobody touches Felt!"
Saitama- "but didn't the old guy touch her a while ago?"
Genos- "He meant something else, Sensei."
Reinhard released his grip on Felt and backed away from the Giant.
Reinhard- "forgive me for being so sudden. but a prophecy has been fulfilled here. I cannot take this lightly."
Felt- "Prophecy? what a load of crap!"
Reinhard- "it is written on the Dragonstone. an Insignia will glow revealing the fifth candidate for the Royal selection."
Rom scratched his head
Old Man Rom- "Hmm, I might have heard something about a prophecy. but I don't remember anything about a Dragonstone, I might be too old to remember."
Felt- "I don't care what the prophecy says. I don't want to be ruler of Lugunica!"
Reinhard- "I see. Then what if I told you, that you'd be the richest person in the land? it would be much better than being a thief living in the slums. what do you think?"
Felt- "Well... No! I hate nobility and I don't care about being rich! I'm not leaving Rom behind!"
Old Man Rom- "You heard what she said. Now leave her alone."
Saitama yawned for an impressive 13 seconds straight.
Felt- "Can you shut up baldy?!"
Saitama- "I'm getting tired of this place! Laguna, was it? Everyone here always points out my baldness! Can you hurry up and give back that insignia to, Amelia?"
the small cat laughed very hard.
Puck- "He even got your name wrong Lia."
The half elf looked away from Saitama embarrassed.
Emilia- "it's not that funny, Puck."
Felt gave away the Insignia then returned to Reinhard.
Felt- "I'm not going anywhere."
Old Man Rom- "Don't make us have to say it again."
Reinhard- "Fine... I didn't want to have to do this."
Reinhard and the Giant fought each other. The giant used a massive blunt weapon to attack Reinhard but the knight was too fast. He didn't even use his own sword. The knight got up behind Rom and touched Rom's forehead. Some magic technique was used to make the giant fall unconcious. Felt backed away from them, he began to run. Reinhard then appeared behind in front of her and placed his hand on her forehead. She fell unconscious.
Reinhard- "Sorry you had to see that... What the?"
Saitama was sleeping on Genos boots. That was an awkward spot to sleep on. Emilia and Puck haven't noticed the bald man falling asleep after watching Reinhard fight Rom. They awkwardly stared at Saitama. It's like he doesn't care about what's happening.
Re:Zero: One punch Knight
If the story is still broken I'll try to rewrite some scenes again