Whumptober Collection

Day 6: Betrayed

This was my first idea for a Voltron fic, actually. The song, for anyone who doesn't recognize it, is What About Us by P!nk.

This one feels much more whump-y than the last. Enjoy all the emotional pain and heartache.

Summary: An Earth song stirs up Allura's feelings and memories regarding Lotor.

Pairings: Allura x Lotor

Related Entries: none

Allura enjoyed Earth's music. Currently confined to the 'hospital' to recover after Voltron's latest battle, and with forced periods of no visitors so that she could rest, the Altean princess had quickly discovered that the musical channels on the 'TV' were a good way to alleviate boredom. She liked to spend her forced rest periods leaning back against a mound of pillows, eyes closed and mind drifting as all sorts of styles of Earth music played. She hadn't expected to ever have any trouble with the music.

"We are searchlights, we can see in the dark

We are rockets, pointed up at the stars

We are billions of beautiful hearts

And you sold us down the river too far"

Stars? That piqued her interest. She hadn't heard Earth music that sang of space yet. Sitting up a little, Allura turned her focus to the lyrics.

"What about us?

What about all the times you said you had the answers?

What about us?

What about all the broken happy ever afters?

What about us?

What about all the plans that ended in disaster?

What about love? What about trust?

What about us?"

So this wasn't a song about space after all. This was another song of broken hearts. Earth music had a strangely heavy focus on the topic of love. Allura felt her heart twinge as the lyrics really sank in. Realizing her attention had drifted away from the music, she shook herself out of the heart-wrenching memories of Lotor and focused back on the music.

"–re willin', we came when you called

But man, you fooled us, enough is enough, oh"

Without realizing what she was doing, Allura snatched up the remote control and hit the button to turn the TV off. Trembling lightly, she set the remote aside and leaned back against her pillows, closing her eyes as tears tried to leak from the corners. Whatever that song had been, it struck too close to home. One hand clenched around the fabric the sheet that covered her as she tried not think about Lotor.

Lotor, who had claimed to have answers.

Lotor, who had called on the Paladins' help and (eventually) gotten their willing help.

Lotor, who had broken the happy ever afters that she had begun to picture.

And even now, she still occasionally pictured them. Sometimes she dreamed of Lotor's reappearance and his genuine regret for the things that he had done. This wasn't fair. He had lied to her, used her and her people, betrayed her, and yet her heart still ached for him whenever she remembered the times he had spent as an ally of Voltron. How could Allura still feel this way for someone she should, someone she did, hate? How could there still be any scrap of positive emotions left for Lotor?

It was confusing and it hurt and now she was cursing at the Earth song for bringing up things she had tried so hard to forget as she rolled over to bury her face in a pillow, muffling the sobs that began to wrench their way out of her.

I feel like I write emotional pain better than physical. Or maybe it's just that I think emotional has more of an impact? Who knows. Anyway... I hope your heart is in pieces but I also hope you enjoyed this.