From the Daily Prophet, May 28th, 1992:
Break-in thwarted at Hogwarts-professor dead, Harry Potter attacked!-Front Page
Hogwarts and the Ministry of Magic have issued a joint statement confirming that yesterday night an unknown individual broke into the school and attempted to steal a priceless magical item in Headmaster Dumbledore's possession. The item-a rare philosopher's stone crafted by the alchemist Nicholas Flamel in the 17th century, was being held by Dumbledore following an attempted burglary in Gringotts in June of last year.
According to star Prophet reporter Rita Skeeter, Professor Quirinus Quirrell was killed during the robbery, while Boy-Who-Lived Harry Potter was attacked and injured after managing to defeat the unidentified assailant, who later died of his wounds. While Ms. Skeeter's confidential sources are always held in the highest regard, Headmaster Dumbledore and the Ministry have strenuously denied the claim, labeling them 'scurrilous and irresponsible rumor'. The conspiracy rag The Quibbler reported the break-in to be the action of He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named, who survived his death and seeks to regain his mortal form. Such preposterous rumors are not to be dwelt upon. Prophet reporters hoping for a follow-up interview were barred entry to the school by the Ministry Aurors, who were combing the property for evidence.
A classified advertisement is to be posted in the Prophet later this week advertising an opening in the Defense Against the Dark Arts position. Possible candidates for the position are Severus Snape, current potions professor and rumored ex-Death Eater, and Gilderoy Lockhart, bestselling author and winner of Witch Weekly's Most Charming Smile.
Mr. Flemel issued a follow-up press release stating his intent to destroy the stone, stating that the item is too powerful a temptation for theft and that he and his wife Perinelle are 'well-past expiration date, so might as well move on to shadier pastures'.
Story continued on Page 5
For Rita Skeeter's interview with Harry Potter, see Page 4
For the history of Nicholas Flemel and the philosopher's stone, see Page 7.
Another item of note, although one overlooked by many of the British Wizarding population in the ensuing media frenzy:
UK-Norway Treaty ratified-Page 8
The British and Norwegian Muggle governments signed and ratified a historic treaty this morning solving the long-running territorial dispute over the island of Trolheim. Located in the middle of the North Sea, the island-population 200,000, plus 80,000 trolls; Capital: Trolberg-has long been fought over by the two nations, each having staked their own claims in the 18th per the treaty, effective one month from today the island will become a semi-independent province of the United Kingdom. As part of the agreement, the uninhabited islands of Myst, R'lyeh, Lilliput and Qwghlm will be absorbed by Norway for 'oyl' speculation.
Due to Trolheim's erratic diplomatic condition, it is one of the few territories without a magical statute of secrets. Thus, its menagerie of magical beasts-in particular, its Elf, Vittra, Lindworm, Barghest and Nisse populations-have been of great interest and study by magical and Muggle zoologists. According to the Trolberg Wizard's Guild, the treaty upholds this exemption, due to the logistical nightmare of obliviating the island from 98% of the world's collective memory.
As part of the treaty, Trolheim's young witches and wizards are to receive invitations to attend Hogwarts. Dumbledore today expressed his hope that the new addition to the school student body will produce "greater house unity... these young students will be less influenced by the house rivalries of old, and thus may break the long-standing social barriers.' Dumbledore also hopes that the addition of Trondheim faculty will shed light on the island's little known magical invitations are expected to be mailed out later this week.
I hope this catches your interest. I've been in need of a new story to work on, one that takes the source materials more seriously than either the Harry Sanchez saga or the Vassago Trilogy. Which isn't to say it won't be goofy, just without the fourth-wall breaking. This piece is to be a planned crossover. If you can guess what creative property I am referring to, you get a kudos.