"Those two are never apart are they?" B.J. remarks one afternoon as he watches Frank with Margaret. Looking over, Hawkeye gives a noncommittal answer before going back to his book. Curious, B.J. asks, "You sound very nonchalant about them."
Shrugging, Hawkeye answers, "Why not?"
"Is their relationship not weird to you?" B.J. asks hoping to find out if Hawkeye likes Margaret. Aside from writing his wife, he thinks matchmaking may be a good past time for the war. Realizing he is supposed to answer, Hawkeye remarks, "They've been like this since I got here."
The odd relationship is not lost on Margaret either. After about a week of Frank following her like a puppy, the nurse finally confronts him about his clinginess. With a frown, all that Frank can say is, "Louis sent me a Dear John letter."
Sorry for her friend, Margaret tells him so adding, "Do you want to talk about it?"
Nodding, the friends enter Margaret's tent. Twenty minutes later, as Frank still pours his heart out about his boyfriend, Margaret sits at her desk shuffling letters and trying to find the one she needs to hand Hawkeye. For the last month, Margaret has been badgering her old friend Donald to pretend to marry her so she can stop acting like an Army nut and get Frank out of her hair. She just needs to find the confirmation letter to give to Hawkeye in Post Op later in the day.
"What are you doing?" Frank whines needing her to pay attention to him. With a sigh, the nurse lies, "I'm debating on whether or not to set you up."
Eyes wide, Frank asks who with.
"An old friend of mine. He actually owes me a favor, but I figured you two could talk," The nurse explains.
"Is he?" Frank cautiously asks. Nodding, Margaret explains, "He just got out of a bad break up. I figured you both could talk things out together, if you want."
"Tell me about him," Frank answers causing his friend to smile. She tells him what Donald is like, and permits Frank to write him before she heads off to her shift in Post Op.
"Captain, I need a word with you for a moment," Margaret announces as professionally as possible before leading her husband somewhere private.
"Why Nurse, to what do I owe this pleasure?" Hawkeye flirts once her realizes they are behind a curtain. Rolling her eyes, Margaret takes out a letter from her coat pocket and hands it to him. Looking at it, the surgeon asks, "Who's this from?"
"Donald Penobscott. He agreed to help us. The rest is explained in the letters I gave you," Margaret replies knowing they need to get back to work. Hawkeye kisses his wife on the cheek in thanks before putting the letter in his own pocket and going to check on a patient.
Over the next few months, Donald and Frank exchange letters with Margaret as their go between. In the middle of winter while the weather is two below zero, Hawkeye and Margaret are put on duty together. Although the time is not ideal, the couple enjoys the small window of time together. What Hawkeye is against is Frank lingering around after his shift to complain about a patient. Finally, the couple hear Frank state, "'Major, Captain, I'll leave you two to carry on.'"
Margaret and Hawkeye glare at him before going back to their work. The rest of the night is filled with shelling and an ill patient. Just as soon as the pair is able to treat the soldier, the shelling stops. Relieved and a little giddy due to the newest events, the couple laughs and Hawkeye offers to share his midnight snack of canned beans. They turn to the can just in time for it to explode. When the explosion is over, Hawkeye notes that most of the beans land on Margaret's face. As they both laugh, Hawkeye uses his finger to scrape the beans off his wife's face.
"'1943. A very good year for beans'," The surgeon remarks before taking another taste. After the third time, he holds his finger up to his wife stating, "Here, try some."
Shaking her head, Margaret answers, "I tasted it already. Besides, I'd rather get cleaned up."
After cleaning up in the scrub room, the nurse goes back to her job. Finally getting off duty around 6 a.m., Margaret wearily enters her tent. Shocked by the explosion of letters littering the area, Margaret stares at Frank in shock surprised that he actually ransacked her things. She mentions keeping all of Donald's letters for him, but is appalled that the man will actually search for them. He gives her some excuse about looking for a pen when she quickly orders him out. Grumbling as she picks up the paper, Margaret never hears her husband enter. Only when the door slams does she look up.
"I thought you were going to sleep," Margaret asks as she puts the letters back in their box. Shaking his head, Hawkeye answers, "Can't sleep. I tried. What's with all the letters?"
"Frank decided to ransack my tent for private letters I kept for him."
"What are they bank statements?" Hawkeye teases. Rolling her eyes, Margaret answers, "No. They're of a personal nature."
Deciding not to delve into his wife's and Frank's relationship, the surgeon changes the subject.
"My dad asked how Donald is," Hawkeye smirks enjoying how much fun his father is having with the ruse.
"He's fine. Tell Daniel thank you for writing those letters for me. I just hope we can keep fooling people."
"Me too. As much as I hate being here, I'd hate to be here without you."
"I would, too."
The couple shares a look before Hawkeye bids her goodnight.
"You could always stay. I know a way to generate heat," Margaret offers. A smile playing from his lips, Hawkeye reluctantly shakes his head.
"The last thing I need is B.J. finding out. I already have my suspicions about Ferret Face."
Margaret merely hums in reply knowing she cannot show her hand. She hates keeping this secret from Hawkeye, but is either too loyal or too stupid a friend to betray Frank's secret. The couple says their good nights before falling asleep in their own beds.