2,119Howdy, folks, how's it going?
Here it is, in accordance to the schedule, the next update to 'Ere We Go, Pluz Ultra.
Let me just say, I am floored with the amount of positive feedback I've been getting for this silly little idea of mine. You guys rock, and I hope you will enjoy what is to come.
As always, the usual shout out to Chaos Productions, great writer and great sounding board.
I own neither Boku No Hero Academia nor Warhammer 40K.
Naw, lez get dis show on dah road, eh, ya gits?
'ERE WE GO, 'ERE WE GO, 'ERE WE GO.
/
As Yagi crossed the esteemed halls of UA, he made a valiant yet ultimately futile effort to contain a weary sigh. With the entrance exam in but a week, all his preparations for his upcoming tenure as a teacher, the making sure that he still made a good amount of public appearances while keeping a track of his timer, the saving as many lives as possible and his… side project with young Midoriya, things had been rather busy for the deflated number 1 Hero. Put bluntly, he probably looked like crap right about now, or at the least more cadaveric than he ever had.
Shaking his head bemusedly at that notion, the man kept moving forward. No rest for the weary, the saying went. Or at least something like that, he was too tired to give a shit.
It wasn't much longer after that that he found himself in the teachers' office, and luckily for him the man he'd been looking for was there as he'd hoped.
"Ah, Power Loader." He called in greeting, the hero's helmeted head turning his direction in response (did he really have to wear that thing all the time? It couldn't be good for his neck and back…). "Just the man I wanted to see."
"Something you need, All Might?" Was the inquiring reply, even as the man's evaluating stare seemed to pierce through the emaciated hero's being. "You look like shit, by the way."
"Ah… Yes, I'm aware. It's… it's been a busy time." Yagi fumbled at the blunt assessment, Power Loader nodding in understanding. "But anyway, you are the one in charge of handling the requisitions for support item usage during the exam, yes?"
"Yeah, that's what I'm doing right now. Not too big of a list this time around, honestly, a belt here, a grappling hook there… worst I got was what first appeared to be a roll of toilet paper but then turned out to be a list of the items some girl wanting to get into the support course refers to as her "babies"." The hero made air quotes a that last word. "I am fairly certain three fourths of that list would've broken the Geneva Convention…"
"Is… Is that something that happens often?" The emaciated hero asked hesitantly, suddenly a bit nervous at the reasons that had brought him here.
"Eh, there's always a couple or so crazy ones in each batch." The excavation hero replied with a shrug. "I just marked 3 or so items I deemed safe enough for her to use. If she can accept that, good, if not, she's out before the tests even begin. The crazy ones are always a pain in the ass to deal with, but oftentimes they can be the ones that can really surprise you."
"God, do I know what that is like…" Yagi breathed out with a commiserating nod, earning him a curious look from his fellow teacher as he pulled some papers from his suitcase. "Speaking of, I was wondering if you could add this to the list and process it for me?"
Taking the files he was being given, Power Loader gave them a read, and when he was done, his head rose to meet Yagi's, and if the skeletal man had to guess, there was likely an incredulously raised eyebrow beneath that helmet.
"…Are you for real?" The hero asked dryly. "I meant that comment about the girl's list as a joke, but while this may not be a tenth as much, it legitimately has me wondering. You know this kid?"
"Uh, yeah." The deflated man replied. That he hadn't been immediately told to fuck off was a boon he was gonna do his best not to waste. "I met him a few months back. Good kid, really wants to be a hero, and, well… You said it yourself, about the crazy ones."
"So you're basically just admitting he's one of those. Can you say with 100% certainty this won't cause a PR nightmare if he starts blowing things up?"
"Power Loader" The excavation hero nearly recoiled at the sudden shift in tone from the number 1 hero. The nervous awkwardness had given way to a blank serenity, a tone of voice that indicated that what was being said was not a hope, a threat, a joke or a promise, but a mere statement of fact. "As I said, I've known this kid for months. And what I can tell you, with 100% certainty, is that regardless of whether or not he enters UA, regardless of whether or not he manages to become a hero, Young Midoriya is gonna be blowing things up. It's not a matter of if, it's a matter of when. Way I see it, it might as well be in a place where we can try to contain and minimize the ensuing property damage."
…
…
"…Shit, so he's one of the good ones, uh?" The oddly helmeted hero quipped after a few moments of silent processing of the words.
"It may not sound like it the way I put it." Yagi stated, suddenly returning to the nervously awkward demeanour as if the shift had never occurred. "But even if his methods may be a bit… much, a drive like that is something that should never be wasted."
"I see…" Was the pensive reply, as the support course overseer gave the papers a more thorough look. "Well, I will be honest, I have my doubts about this. But, given such shining endorsement from the Number 1 Hero, plus the fact that all the legal mumbo jumbo seems to be all very well discriminated and written out, I guess I can let it pass, but it's your ass if anything goes wrong. Seriously though, whoever went through the trouble of filling out these attached forms must be some hard-working joe…"
On that much Yagi could agree. For such a kind, saintly housewife, Inko Midoriya sure had a downright frightening amount of knowledge of all the ins and outs of the cutthroat world of quirk regulations and policies. Then again, given how Izuku was, it made sense she'd have been forced to learn quickly…
/
A week later found the Midoriyas at the entrance of their home, Inko seeing her special little guy off on this very important day, Izuku all but shaking in giddy eagerness at what was to come.
"You've got everything, Izuku?" She inquired gently, that familiar, ever present smile on her face.
"Yah, Mah, everything's ready." The green-haired boy confirmed cheerily, patting both his backpack and fanny pack.
"Pens for the written exams?"
"In the bag. Check."
"Handkerchief?"
"In the pocket. Check."
"The bento I made?"
"Packed and eagerly anticipated. Check."
"All ordnance in working order and designed for the least amount of friendly fire possible?"
"Uuugggghh…" The boy groaned in protest, a dismayed grimace marring his face. "Feelz so wrong tah compurmise on dah dakka. It'z just a coupl'or so gizmos…"
"Izuku…" The name was called with just a slight hint of amused chastisement. "I believe Yagi-san and All Might were quite clear on that, were they not?"
"Hurgh, aye, aye, Mah, I'll stick to dah rubbah rounds," Izuku confirmed, looking like he had just swallowed a mouthful of sewage. "But if fings start goin' bad, I reserv dah roigt tah pull out dah big guns! Dat'z dah deal!"
"I suppose that's the best anyone's going to get out of this arrangement." The woman chuckled lightly. "All right then, off with you."
"Aye, Mah! Catcha later!" And with that, the green-haired boy made to turn and leave…
"Oh, and Izuku?"
"Yeah, Mah?"
"I am so proud of you." Inko said, her tone of voice shifting slightly, conveying things that even were other people to be overhearing, they would not be able to understand, her smile shifting to become a bit less indulgent amusement and a bit more something else, something melancholic. "Go out there and show them what you're made of."
For a brief few moments, her son did not reply, a certain blank confusion spreading across his features as he considered the words, blinking once, twice.
"Thanks, Mom." He ultimately said, a big, goofy grin blooming. "Dey'z nevah gun see me comin' till I'z alredy stompin' dem good!"
And with that, her boy was out the door.
Inko allowed herself a few moments to just stand there, contemplating the departure of the person that meant everything to her, on the way to take the first true step to achieve his dreams. Then she turned around and began making preparations for a special dinner for his inevitably triumphant return.
She also took the opportunity to spare a quick prayer for any poor unfortunate thing that UA would be throwing at Izuku this day. A futile gesture, but a nice one nonetheless.
/
"Oooooowwwwaaaaaa…" Izuku could not help but breathe out in awe as he stood upon the threshold of the UA Academy's entrance. The building was big as all zog, if a bit too heavy on the glass windows in his opinion, and the rows of statues of some of the greatest, toughest, dead-hardest heroes that had ever lived lined the way into it.
In the green-haired boy's mind, he could almost imagine them looking at him with taunting grins and challenging looks, daring him to try to be half as good as they had been. Joke was on them, he concluded with a wide grin (scaring some other gits into keeping a distance, not that he noticed), 'cause he was going to be twice as great!
"Out of my way, Deku." A growling voice behind him interrupted Izuku's musings, making him turn to see Katsuki standing there, glaring at him with something between extreme annoyance and murderous anger. The usual fare when it came to the blond boy.
"Oh, Hi, Katsu'! I wuz wonderin' where yoo wuz." He greeted with a happy grin. "Ready tah bust sum headz and take sum names?"
For reasons that where beyond Izuku, the friendly greeting only seemed to set off the other boy more, his red eyes (not as red as yours truly and he'd fight anyone who claimed otherwise!) narrowing and his teeth gritting, all but grinding in irritation. He looked, quite frankly, just about ready to blow.
That was something Izuku had always liked about Ol' Katsu, really. He knew how to keep things fun.
"Fuck off, Deku. Get out of my way." The explosive boy ground out, hands twitching in a way that promised that things were about to get loud.
"I dun fink I will, Ol' Katsu." Izuku replied very calmly, the faintest edge of something nasty marring his big friendly grin. "Yer not askin' niceliek, pluz dere's enuff space around fer ya to pass."
He could've sworn he heard something go boom. Probably Katsu's temper.
"You think you're fucking funny, Deku!?" Katsuki ground out, stomping forward until they were face to face, hand reaching to grab at the green-haired boy's shirt. "Bad enough that you've been shitting on all of my plans, you still think that your crazy shittery of a quirk means your anywhere near close enough to my league to be shit talking?!"
"Sumtimez I wonder'bout yer grasp on realatee, 'Splody boy." The green-haired boy replied, sounding both annoyed and genuinely confused, which in turn seemed to piss the other teen off all the more. "I'z not shittin' on anyfink, yu'ze dah one bein' a dikk roigt now!"
"FUCK YOU, DEKU!" Katsuki bellowed, spittle nearly flying out of his mouth as his rage reached near apoplectic levels. "I DON'T KNOW WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN THAT FUCKED UP MIND OF YOURS, I DON'T KNOW HOW THEY EVEN LET YOU BE HERE TODAY, BUT YOU HAD BETTER BE GODDAMN SURE THAT YOU'RE NEVER GONNA BE BETTER THAN ME!"
"OHOHOH, RILLEE?!" Izuku bellowed back, if for no other reason than that seemed to be the flow of the conversation, as he grabbed the arm grabbing him. "YA WANNA PUT YER MONEY WHER'YER MOUTH IZ, YA 'SPLODY GIT?! 'CUZ I'M DOWN! WE CAN HAZ A GO, ROIGT HERE, ROIGT NAW!"
To the green-haired boy's delight, Katsuki seemed about ready to accept the challenge, small pops beginning to crackle in his free hand…
"Uuhm, e-excuse me?"
"WHAT/WOT?!" The two boys yelled in unison, glaring in the direction the interruption had dared to come from, to see a girl, with brown hair, two bangs framing her face, and adorable rosy cheeks, taking a step back in trepidation, her eyes wide in alarm and a bit of concern.
"Y-you shouldn't fight." The girl said meekly, most likely regretting her choice of trying to separate the arguing duo.
"NONE'A YOUR BUSINESS, ROUND FACE/ YA GIT! FUCK/ZOG OFF!"
Suddenly the sole target of all the fury that had been building up, the poor girl wisely decided it was best to slowly take a few more steps back before turning around and beating a hasty retreat further into the school.
Her unwanted intervention, however, seemed to have the side effect of giving Katsuki's rage enough of an outlet that the boy calmed down, at least enough to let go of Izuku with a tsk of attempted dismissiveness.
"I guess it doesn't matter why you're here, Deku." He said, a venomous glare on his face. "Because mark my words, when the time for the practical exam comes, I will put you in your place."
And with that, the explosive blond turned slightly to the right and moved forward, shouldering past Izuku.
Good old fashion Katsu brand hot air, the green haired boy mused. Never failed to make a day interesting.
/
A short while later found Izuku seated in a massive auditorium, alongside every other student trying to gun for a place in UA's hero course. Ironically enough, seat placements had put him right next to Ol' Katsu, which he personally found hilarious in the way it made his old bud release smoke from his ears. Not that Izuku could blame him, having so many gits around and no brawlin' going on felt like such a waste…
As the green-haired boy glanced around however, sizing up which of the gits in his immediate vicinity might make for a fun scrap, all the light in the room flashed open and aimed at the podium, and the figure with an enormous grin and even more enormous, spiked tuft of blond hair, that now stood upon it.
"WHAT'S UP, LITTLE LISTENERS?!" The hero all the kids with a modicum of hero knowledge recognized as Present Mic, yelled out with that manic enthusiasm he was so well known for, putting a hand to his ear as he turned it to the audience. "EVERYBODY SAY HHEEEY!"
A few beats of sepulchral silence followed, as most of the kids present were not quite sure how to react, and pretty much all of them certainly did not want to do as asked…
"HHHHHHHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEYYYYYYYYYY!"
Quite a few people jumped in their seats at the deafening below, all heads in the room turning to the source, to find Izuku standing up from his seat, his fist raised high in the air as he stared down at the hero who, for a scant few seconds, seemed as surprised as everyone else.
Then a shit-eating grin bloomed on the man's face.
"YEEESSS! FINALLY, SOMEONE WHO GETS IT! THANK YOU!" Present Mic cheered, throwing finger guns in the kid's direction. "APPLICANT 23451, YOU ARE NOW MY FAVORITE KID IN THE ROOM!"
The enthusiastic boy grinned back in equal measure as he returned to his seat, and the suddenly in a much more genuine good mood hero proceeded to explain what was gonna be expected of them.
Ooooooohhh, they were gonna be smashin' robots, that was going to be-
"What the fuck was that, Deku?" Katsuki all but hissed from his side, snapping Izuku out of his growing excitement.
"Wot dah zog was wot?" He asked in confusion.
"Since when do you kiss ass like that?" The blond growled out.
"…Dah zog yu'ze goin' on about? Datz Present Mike!" Izuku whispered back, blinking owlishly. "I nevah miss hiz shows if ah can help it, and he just asked us tah maek sum noise! How could I sez no?!"
Katsuki made to open his mouth for a scathing retort… but then he realized that this was indeed an opportunity that Deku simply wouldn't have been able to pass up, and so he thought better of it and just turned forward again.
"-And you, the green-haired boy!"
Blinking at the sudden calling out (for who else could whoever the zog this was be talking about? He was the greenest!), Izuku turned towards another section of the auditorium, where the tall, short-haired young man who had stopped Present Mic's explanation with some overly worded question he couldn't be zogged to pay attention to stood rigidly, glasses over a stern frown.
"You and the boy beside you have been muttering for a while now." Glasses loudly proclaimed. "It's distracting! If you are not going to take this seriously-"
Oh, zog no.
"YOU SHADDUP, YA STUFFY GIT!" Izuku bellowed in outrage, making the other boy recoil at the sudden hostility. "WOT GIVES YA DAH ROIGT TAH JUDGE MAH SERIUSNEZ?! YOU'ZE DAH ONE INTERRUPTIN' WITH STOOPID KWESHTOONS!"
"What? That is not… I-Uh, but…"
The git with the glasses spent several moments making a pretty good impression of a fish, seemingly unable to process his "just" admonishment being so crassly interrupted and then getting called out in turn, much to the general amusement of the listening audience. Hell, even Katsuki was grinning in approval. Then Present Mic took pity on the guy and spoke up, settling down the crowds as he answered to the git's question, explaining how the fourth kind of robot they'd be facing offered no points and would best be avoided. Humiliated, the boy respectfully apologized for his interruption and sat back down, though not before throwing a glare in Izuku's direction, but that too quailed when the green-haired boy threw him back a glare of his own.
Typical stuffy git behaviour, he concluded. Could dish it out, but couldn't take it.
Soon after that, with some last words of encouragement from the proctoring hero, they were told to gather at their assigned test areas so they could get this show on the road, and the belligerent duo realized that they had been assigned to different areas. Probably some bullshit about preventing cooperation between friends or some such.
"Tsk, doesn't matter." Katsuki spat, scowling at Izuku. "Even if I can't kick your shit in directly, rest assured Deku, my score is gonna leave you in the dirt."
"In yer dreams, 'Splody Boy." The green-haired boy replied, calling out to the already leaving explosive blond. "Oh, and Katsu?"
"What?!" The boy barked, turning his head to glare at his most despised enemy… only to falter briefly at the grin on his face, one he recognized well.
"Have fun." Izuku said simply, crimson eyes shining with bloodthirst. "I know I will."
It was only then that it occurred to Katsuki that, now they knew they'd be up against solely robotic opponents, Deku had little reason to hold back…
It took more effort than he'd care to admit to not pick up the pace as he walked away.
/
A little while later, a group of hopeful soon to be students stood before the massive gates of one of the designated test sites, minutes before the beginning of the trial. Most of them were nervous in their own ways, and each and everyone of them tried to find outlets for that nervousness as best they could. Some turned to friendly banter with their peers, boasting about their upcoming success to reassure themselves of it. Some opted for quiet meditation, seeking to calm themselves and find their center in the upcoming ordeal. Some others took the opportunity to psych themselves up, and others still just went for good old fashioned warm up exercises.
Not giving a flying zog about any of that, Izuku simply crouched down amidst everyone else, hands in his fanny pack as he muttered to himself.
"Dat'z runnin' properly? Check… All dakka locked and loaded? Check… Hhhm, zoggin' shame I culdnt finish dat in time for dis, but dah zoggin bitz just won't stick, mebe if I-"
"Hey, you!"
Annoyed at the interruption, the green boy looked up, and didn't bother masking the exasperation he was feeling when he saw the stuffy git approaching him, although that was soon replaced by surprise as he noticed the exhaust pipes on his legs.
Did… Did this stuck up git have leg engines as a quirk? Zog, some people got all the luck, the things he could've done with something like-
"What, exactly, are you doing?!" The git demanded, ruining Izuku's moment of wonder. "Are you looking to gain some sort of unfair advantage over your competitors with whatever you're carrying in that bag? Because if so I will not hesitate to report you to the proctors."
The git's voice was seriously starting to grate on Izuku's ears, a curious thought passing through his mind, wondering how much dakka he'd have to cram down the git's throat to get him to shut up for good…
"Go away." He said, chuckling lightly to himself at the funny image as he refocused his attention on his fanny pack. "I'm busy."
"Excuse me?!" Glasses recoiled at the dismissal, all bristling indignation. "Is this a joke to you? Didn't you just hear what I-"
"Oh, I heard ya'z loud'n clear." The shorter boy interrupted, not even bothering to acknowledge the nuisance with a glance. "I just dun give a zog wot you fink. I'z 'ere tah be a hero, an' I'z gun do it fair an' square, wiff all dah toolz mah quirk helped me make. So git'off mah back and zog off, before I forget dah promise I made 'bout friendly fire."
"Friendly fire?!" The git took a cautious step back, as if finally catching on to how much of a git he was being. "Are you truly trying to-?!"
"AAAANNND START!"
"WWWWWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!"
…
…
The students stood, transfixed, trying to process what had just happened. One second, the weird green kid had been crouched down, barely paying attention to anything but glasses guy nagging, and the next he was on his feet and rushing towards the fake city while belting out a bellow that sounded almost too loud for human vocal cords, nearly bowling over a couple of other students in the way.
As one, they turned to Present Mic, whose presence in and of itself was also an unexpected turn of events, silently asking for clarification about what had just happened.
The hero, for his part, just grinned back at them.
"WELL? WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR? IF YOU REALLY WANT TO BE HEROES YOU SHOULD BE QUICKER ON THE UPTAKE, LIKE 23451 THERE. THE EXAM'S STARTED! GO! GO! GO!"
With that, the situation finally dawned on the hopeful heroes to be, and the stampede ensued.
/
On the observation room, All Might stood with his fellow teachers, his form muscular and his grin wide, waiting for things to start. The UA entrance exam… God, it felt like a lifetime ago, when he himself had been in the position of the kids on the various screens, nothing to his name but a newly acquired quirk after an entire young life without, and all the hopes and expectations that came with it…
He wondered, as he glanced over as many prospective students as he could, what would each of them have felt had they been in his specific situation. How well they'd do now that their own turn had come. And most of all he wondered-
"Scouting out for potential candidates?" Nezu suddenly inquired at his side, making the number 1 hero jump at the little critter's sneakiness.
"Ehrm, well, that is to say…" All Might fumbled, trying to remember how to form coherent sentences again. "Yes, I suppose I am."
The screening of this batch of students for a potential successor was admittedly one of the three main reasons why All Might had decided to join in watching the proceedings, even though he wasn't part of the evaluation board. Much as he hated to admit, the fact of the matter was that he simply couldn't keep this up forever. He needed to find someone to pass the mantle on to, and fast.
The second reason was to observe his colleagues at work in analysing the student candidates, in the vain hopes of glimpsing some tips and tricks for his own upcoming time as a teacher. Heavens knew he couldn't be going in blind on that one…
"Well, then," Nezu stated, in a tone that had All Might wondering if the Headmaster had read every single thought that had just gone through his mind… "Let's get this show on the road, shall we? Power Loader, give Mic the go ahead."
"Yes, sir." The excavation hero replied, pressing a button.
An instant later, All Might witnessed through the screens how most of the students fumbled as they got caught off guard by the abrupt start of the exam, and the visible amusement that caused to his colleagues.
"Eh." Snipe chuckled. "They never see it comin'."
"Oh, I don't know." The far too provocatively dressed Midnight commented, in a voice that sounded far too sultry. "At least a few of them seem eager enough to get going. Like that one there, he didn't even hesitate. I like that."
Against his better judgement, the number 1 hero turned to the screen she'd been talking about and… Oh.
There went the third reason he was here.
He gave a quick prayer for the chaos to not get too out of hand.
/
Izuku ran through the streets of the fake city, ahead of the crowd, bellowing at the top of his lungs all the while. After all, if the robots were programmed to fight them, what better way to get them to show up than to provide a target?
"WHERE YOU'ZE AT, YA ROBO GITZ?!" He taunted, looking left and right in eager anticipation of the upcoming scrap. "COME ON, I'Z GOT SUM GIZMOS HERE DAT I'D LOVE YA TAH MEET! COME HAVE A GO IF YA FINK YA GOT DAH BITZ!"
As if summoned by his words, out from a corner came a towering figure of steel standing upon a single large wheel, one limb ending in a massive metal fist, and the other in a rotating cannon that had the green-haired boy eyeing it greedily.
A 1-point bot, Izuku noted. Ah well, gotta start somewhere.
"Puny organic detected." It said in a blank, mechanical tone, its single red lens flaring as it fell upon the boy's figure and it rose its cannon arm. "Commencing extermination protocols."
"OH DAT A FACT?!" The grinning boy challenged, reaching into the fanny pack at his waist, and pulling out his trusty, lucky shoota. "EXTERMINATE DIS, DEN! WWWAAAAAGGGGHHHH!"
Izuku pulled the trigger, and his loud bellow was drowned out by the even louder deluge of ammunition that fell upon the 1-pointer, an onslaught that made even the programming that passed for its mind have a taste of the concept of surprise, making the robot recoil backwards at the sheer rate of fire that was pinging off its chassis.
A pinging noise that had the shit-eating grin fading slowly from the green-haired boy's face, as he realized that, as loud and fun as this was being, his shoota wasn't really damaging the robot any worse than putting some minor dents in it. And it seemed like the 1-pointer itself was catching on.
"Damage from puny organic's attack: Insignificant." It intoned, as it began moving forward. "Commencing retaliation protocols."
"…Nevah, evah, evah, compurmize on dah dakka." Izuku growled to himself at the travesty of the lack of effect of his rubber rounds. "THANKZ'A LOT, ALL MOIGT! Aight den, plan B it iz…"
Grumbling to himself at the injustice of it all, the aggravated boy once more reached into his fanny pack, completely unheeding of the approaching wall of steel even as it stood right next to him.
"Die, Puny organic."
The 1-pointer rose its fist and brought it smashing down on its target that was just now reacting to its presence, by swinging one of his arms, now covered in a large, unwieldy, metallic block, painted a deep red, to meet the incoming blow. A foolish last-ditch attempt at protection with a rudimentary shield from the puny organic, its programming concluded.
The blow connected with a loud clang… and the robot's arm went no further.
Confused, it tried to move the appendage, but all that resulted in was strain on its hydraulics and the keening groan of twisting metal. It was at this point that the automaton noticed the three large, scything talons of steel clenched around its forearm, tearing deep into the metal like a hot knife through butter.
"Need a hand?!" Izuku taunted cheekily.
The 1-pointer brought its cannon up in response, only to have its laser shot hit a nearby building when the boy moved his power claw, forcing its arms to smack together and diverting the attack.
"Oh, so ya scrappy gits get tah use proppah shooty fings but I can't?! How'z dat fair?!"
"Fairness is irrelevant. Please release this unit so extermination of puny organics can continue."
"Yah, no, I'z dah one doin' dah exterminatin' round here!" Letting go of the robot's arm, and before it could react, the incensed boy approached the villain-bot and dug his claw in its chest, using it to climb the metal frame until he was on top of it. The 1-pointer made to grab him, only for its arm to be restrained by the steel talons once again.
Except this time, instead of just keeping it trapped, the aspiring student swung his claw downwards, forcing the robot's fist to smash against its head. And then he did it again, and then again some more.
"QUIT HITTIN' YERSELF! QUIT HITTIN' YERSELF, YA GIT!"
Its optics damage from the blows of its own fist, the 1-pointer raised its cannon arm and frantically begun shooting, seeking to dislodge its attacker, a veritable red lightshow that went wide in every shot on account of the ruined targeting systems. Glancing down at the top of the robot he stood on, Izuku's eyes begun combing the steel chassis for another good place to wreck- oh, big shut down button, right between his feet.
Letting go of the villain bot's arm, the power claw came crashing down, ripping off that entire section of the chassis, revealing the intricate network of tubes and wiring beneath, connecting the metallic frame to the robot's processing unit. With all the finesse of a drunk rhino, the green-haired boy reached down with his free hand and ripped out a bundle of them.
The 1-pointer immediately went ramrod straight, ceasing all motion with a whirring, gravely beep.
"Ah!" The boy gloated at the success. "Not so tuff now iz'ya-"
Barely noticing that the cables in his hand were still connected to the robot's interior, Izuku was caught by surprised when a small tug upwards on his part caused the automaton's arm to lift and unleash a crimson laser beam that blew the head of an approaching 2-pointer clean off its frame.
Izuku blinked.
Then, just to make sure he wasn't seeing things, he tentatively tugged the cables forward, and sure enough, the robot advanced forward.
…Well, now.
Come to think of it, nothing in his promise said anything about using someone else's dakka, right?
A wide, manic grin bloomed on the boy's face.
"Oh, dis gun be gud…"
/
"Well, didn't see that comin'." Snipe commented, as the assembled teachers, drawn to the spectacle of the exam's first confrontation, watched the boy suddenly take off on the 1-pointer at speeds he wasn't even sure the things should be able to reach. "That looked familiar to you too, right Power Loader?"
"Yes." The excavation hero grunted, turning to All Might. "So, that's the kid, uh?"
"Yes, that's him." The number 1 hero confirmed, a weary sigh escaping his lips. It was a vain hope that the boy would've not stirred things up too much, and he knew it.
"A reckless display." Eraserhead, looking as always like he hadn't had enough sleep and as always sounding as grumpy as such a state would imply, threw in his two cents, clearly not too impressed with the kid's stunt.
"Maybe, but it certainly got the job done." Midnight allowed, before voicing her confusion. "But what exactly did he do? Who's this kid?"
At that question, the cloaked, nightmarish looking Ectoplasm picked up his personal screen pad and began running through the applicants' listings "Let's see… Ah, here he is. Izuku Midoriya. Quirk,… "The Waaagh"? Apparently it lets him manipulate machinery and build things from scrap. He put in a request for support items of his own creation during the exam."
At that, the spacesuit wearing Thirteen turned to All Might and Power Loader.
"You allowed a request to bring a gun into the exam? And you gave the okay?" They questioned, not quite in reproach, but certainly not quite comprehending their colleagues' laxness.
"The forms were all properly filled out, and it even came with a couple of annex listings of quirk laws that specified how the kid's creations were a part of his quirk. I couldn't really say no." The excavation hero said simply, sparing a hesitant All Might from pitching in, although a confused frown was marring his face as he looked at his own personal screen pad. "But this is odd…"
"What is?"
"I've been monitoring all the villain bot units. We've lost all connection with Victory Unit 37-B, the one the kid has taken. It's been completely cut off from our network. Which shouldn't have happened unless it was completely obliterated. He shouldn't have just been able to hijack the robot, it simply doesn't work like that…"
"Uh," Snipe replied intelligently. "Guess that's the "manipulate machinery" part at work? And on that note, building things from scrap? Where would he find enough of that for the amount of ammunition we've just seen him use?"
Listening in on his colleagues conversation, All Might's ever-present smile froze in place, a bead of cold sweat running down his forehead…
"Now, Young Izuku, being a hero is more than just fighting, helping the community is also important! This beach has fallen into heavy disrepair, and so it'll be your job to-"
"LOOK'AT ALL DAH LUVLY JUNK! THANKS, ALL MOIGT, I'Z GUN PUT DIS TAH GUD USE!"
…He pointedly gave no indication of having heard the question, opting instead for paying attention to what his kinda sorta maybe protégé/provider of heart attacks was going to do next.
/
Amidst all the fighting that was going on in the streets around her, Mina Ashido allowed herself a moment to breathe.
The horned, vivid-pink skinned girl knew full well that UA was the best hero school in the country for a reason, but still, this exam was a fair bit more hardcore than she had been expecting. In the distance, she could see a few bots floating helplessly in the air before some brunette did something to make them come crashing down, and closer still, someone was literally eating one of the robots, and even that weird flamboyant blond kid was putting in a surprising amount of work with those lasers.
It occurred to her that there were probably something close to a thousand applicants here today, trying their hardest to earn their place in the 40 spots available. Could she really compete with that…?
Her hand came up to smack her own cheek. What was she doing, moping and self-doubting like this? She was Mina Ashido! She was a pink can of kick ass and she was going to show it!
Heck, she even already had a decent score going, it was only a matter of wrecking a few more bots before they ran out.
With that thought in mind, the girl turned… And golden eyes upon black sclerae nearly bulged out of her head as she found herself face to face with a massive 3-pointer bot, cannons primed and aimed at her.
"Oh, shi-!"
"Puny organic detected, commencing extermi-"
"WWWWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGHHHHH!"
A green blur slammed into the robot from the side, and it took a few minutes for Mina to comprehend that yes, a 1-pointer had indeed just saved her by shoulder-checking her would be attacker. Then, before the larger machine could react, a cannon arm took aim.
"AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH! ZAP! ZAP! ZAP! ZAP'EM GOOD, SCRAPPY!"
Between laser bursts and bouts of uproarious, almost maniacal laughter, it finally registered on Mina that the green-haired guy that had rushed in ahead of all of them was riding shotgun on top of the smaller robot, manipulating it like a marionette through the cords coming from between its shoulders.
"OI, PINKY!" The guy then called out to her, jerking her out of her shock.
"Uh, yes?" She ventured lamely, but come on, give her a break! This was hardly a normal occurrence!
With a tug of his hand, the 1-pointer grabbed its larger and badly mangled counterpart's head and dragged it down to her level.
"Ya wanna krump it?" He inquired.
Mina blinked.
"…Uuuuh, what?"
"Do ya wanna finish it, or can I?" The boy asked again, a slight tinge of impatience in his tone.
Mina blinked again.
"Uh yeah. Yeah, totally. Thanks, I guess."
The girl put a hand to the robot, and watched its struggles fade into stillness as she pumped as much acid as she could, melting the head into a mess on the ground.
"Oi, dat'z a neat trik, dat iz!"
"…Thanks?" She replied uncertainly.
"You'ze welcome!" He grinned at her, not unlike a cat might grin at a mouse. "Well, den, keep'on enjoyin' dis moigty fine scrap. Zog knowz I will! NOW, RIDE, SCRAPPY, RIDE INTAH BATTLE! WAAAAAAGGH!"
With that, her rescuer's improbable vehicle surged forward, leaving Mina behind in the wake of its dust.
… What a weird guy.
/
Despite everything, All Might couldn't help but feel genuine pride. Young Izuku's… somewhat extreme penchant for violence and eagerness for battle might be showing a bit, but at least the boy wasn't letting that stop him from lending a hand to his fellow applicants that found themselves in a bind.
Sure, jury was out on whether he had actually noticed them or not before charging in guns blazing, but his fellow teachers didn't need to know that.
"Well then," Nezu suddenly stated, taking a quaint little sip from the mug of tea in his hands. "We're at the tail end of the exam. I would say it's time to finish things off with a bang. Power Loader, if you would?"
"Yes, sir." The helmeted hero grunted, pressing a big, red button on the room's main console.
Which, if All Might's recent experiences had taught him anything, was very much not a good sign…
/
Izuku honestly could not remember the last time he'd had this much fun.
Riding a robot at decidedly unsafe speeds through an increasingly more ruined facsimile of a city, turning every bot that got into his field of vision into piles of scrap, doing the occasional good deed by helping out a git that had gotten in over their heads in the fight, the noise, the property damage, the destruction!
You know, the simple pleasures, always the best ones in life.
He was in the midst of repeteadly bashing another 1-point bot against a wall however, when he finally noticed that all the other gits seemed to be running past him, in obvious panic as they tried to escape something. A second later he realized, with a blink, that it had suddenly turned darker.
…Where'd the sun go?
"Wot dah zo-oooooooooooooooowwwwwwaaa…" Turning around, Izuku's words died in his mouth as he looked up. And up. And up.
Either he really had been paying too little attention to Present Mic's explanations because of Katsu and the stuffy git, or the hero had neglected to mention that one of the robot classes they'd be facing was actually a gargantuan colossus of steel, looming over even the building around it as the ground shook with its ponderous strides.
There was really only one way the red-eyed boy could react to this.
"I WANNA KRUMP IT!"
A grin that only didn't get any wider because that would be anatomically impossible, the battle-eager boy made to push his trusty steed forward…
"H-help!"
… When he he heard the frightened call amidst all the noise, and glancing down, saw some git, who he recognized as the girl that had rudely tried to interrupt his friendly conversation with Katsu earlier, desperately trying to free her trapped leg from the rubble, directly in the path of the massive robot that didn't even seem to notice her.
Slowly, very slowly, the grin on the boy's face vanished, leaving behind an oddly blank expression.
"…Oh, zog no."
/
Not counting her earlier encounter with that very angry duo and the pangs of nausea that had been assaulting her throughout the exam, Ochako Uraraka could probably say her day hadn't been going too bad. She had been given a shot at UA, far as she could tell, she'd been doing decently well in the exam, all in all, things were looking good for her future prospects.
Of course, it was mere seconds after she had that thought that the 0-pointer decided to pop out from out of nowhere right next to her, leaving her trapped under the debris. It'd almost be fascinating how things could go sideways so quickly if she hadn't been the one things were going sideways for.
Trying very hard to keep her cool amidst the stressful situation, the brunette tried to use her quirk to get the rubble off her foot, but unfortunately, her stomach resented the effort too badly and she did not manage it. Frantically she tried to call for help, but the other applicants either didn't see her beneath the robot or didn't hear her over the cacophony it was making with every movement.
So, as she once again looked up, to see the massive metal foot slowly coming down on her, Ochako couldn't help but think that she could really use a hero right about now…
"WWWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHH!"
A burst of laser beams crashed into the metal colossus, making it briefly hesitate in its stride.
And next thing Ochako knew, a 1-pointer skidded to a stop right next to her, picked the rubble off her foot, grabbed her with surprising gentleness, and then proceeded to run back down the street.
It was only when they were at a relatively safe distance, as the 1-pointer dropped her on its back, that the brunette noticed the boy, one of the angry duo of this morning, piloting the thing.
"You ok?" He asked her, a heavy frown on his face as he looked her over.
"Y-yes." She found herself replying, once the shock of what had just happened wore off enough.
"Good." The boy said with a nod, throwing a glare in the 0-pointer's direction. "Here. Keep'er taut and steady, wuld ya?"
He handed her the cords he'd been using to move the robot, and Ochako, not quite getting it, simply did as she was told. Meanwhile, he reached his hands into his fanny pack, seemingly looking for something in there while mumbling something to himself.
"Lesse, shoota? Not shooty enuff. Choppa? Not choppy enuff… Powah Klaw? Not big enuff… Dat'z not done yet and I should relly get tah it… oh, didn't know dat was still here…"
As the boy grumbled, Ochako noticed with increasing distress that the 0-pointer was approaching surprisingly quickly for something of its bulk.
"Uuuh, excuse me?" She ventured, a heavy note of urgency in her voice.
"Yah?" The boy replied carelessly, not looking up.
"Shouldn't we be getting out of here?"
"Zog, no." The boy threw a glare at her, though it somehow felt to her that she wasn't the intended recipient. "Dis fing nearly stomped ya tah paste, put all'o uz in danger, iz causin' hooge amounts a' property damage an' iz selfishly hoggin' it all tah itself while interruptin' MAH ZOGGIN' GUD TIME! IT'Z GOIN DOWN!"
…
…
"…Oooook." The brunette ventured hesitantly. "And how are you planning on doing that…?"
"Duncha fret none." He said, a grin on his face that she supposed was meant to be reassuring. "I haz a kunnin' plan."
Then he turned back to the massive robot and bellowed at the top of his lungs.
"OOOOOIIIII! YA GIANT, WALKIN' PILE' A JUNK!"
Stopping in its stride, the 0-pointer's head tilted downwards to look at them, the six red lenses on what passed for its face flashing almost as if it actually felt insulted.
Then the boy pulled whatever he'd been looking from the fanny pack-How did a freaking rocket launcher fit in there?!
"GIT'ZOGGED!"
A salvo of six yellow rockets, dotted in checkered patterns, flew true. Two of them struck the the 0-pointer's arm, another three found their mark between the shoulder and the neck, and the final one hit it directly in the face, each one resulting in a positively deafening detonation and massive bursts of smoke and fire.
The impact was apparently so strong that, with a loud, keening, metallic groan, the colossal automaton began tilting backwards, its entire form engulfed in a chain reaction of explosions.
And as the heat wave blasted through her hair, Ochako didn't know whether she should be grateful to the boy for saving her life, or worrying about the way he was grinning as the light of the flames reflected upon his blood red eyes…
/
Katsuki had been breezing through the exam, completely annihilating every robot in the area, and going out of his way to ensure that all the damn extras around got as little as possible.
He was the best, and nobody was gonna trump his score, least of all fucking Deku!
Of course, it was at the moment that thought crossed his mind, that a sudden burst of light lit up the shadows of the buildings around, and looking behind him, a large, mushroom cloud could be seen.
The explosive blond's face briefly went slack from the shock at the sight. But that was very quickly replaced by a leer of sheer fury.
"DEKU, YOU FUCKING SHOWOFF!"
/
A sepulchral silence filled the observation room.
Glancing around himself at the slack-jawed looks of shock in his colleagues (except for All Might, who for some reason was face palming), Snipe decided to take the initiative.
"Aight', I'll be the one to say it…" The sharpshooting hero took a deep breath. "What in tarnation was that?!"
"That," Power Loader stated bluntly. "Was a kid blowing the crap out of one of our Executor class villain bots with a rocket launcher of his own creation that he somehow pulled out of a fanny pack."
"This," Nezu replied, for once sounding genuinely surprised. "Was not quite what I meant with finishing things off with a bang."
The excavation hero shrugged at that, then he turned towards Eraserhead and Vlad King, the former very awake for once and the later utterly flabbergasted, and stated what most of those present were likely thinking.
"I am so glad he's going to be your problem."
/
So.
That was a thing.
An orky enough way to ago about an entry exam, wouldn't you say?
Also, I feel the need to make one thing clear. I had absolutely no intention of bashing Iida in this chapter. But come on, did you honestly expect his by the book, rigid demeanour to mesh well with orkyness?
Yeah, didn't think so.
So, next time around, a bit of fallout, and the beginning of a new school year. Stay tuned if you want to know what's the deal with that fanny pack.
Next month, ya'll are getting an update to Through the Eternities.
Cya all then.