This is set about 3 years after Last Guardian

Disclaimer: I don't own Artemis Fowl Sadly, Eion Colfer does, I do though own the plot

Chapter 1

Artemis' phone ringed from his nightstand. Picking it up Artemis says

"Phone, answer the call"

"Yes, answering the call," said Lilli Fronds voice, Smiling Artemis thought Holly will be so irritated Lili Frond is one of the many fairies Holly dislikes oh not Frond, Kelp Lilli Kelp

"Mud Boy! What did you do?" Holly's voice sounded from the screen

"Holly, what do you mean, Foaly was watching me for the past 3 years, saying that I am a mere clone while my original dead body is decomposing in my coffin, You really think that I didn't notice that some bug camera's around my house?" Artemis retorts.

"You are sure right, I have but this is not important, we just came across an interesting book" Foaly answers.

"Foaly, hopefully, this isn't story time." Artemis chuckles.

"D'ar-" Foaly starts before Commander Trouble Kelp burst through the door, snarling.

"Foaly, what is this about a mystery package we got this morning addressed to Holly, Mud boy

and me?" Trouble Kelp bawled.

"look who woke up on the wrong side of their bed" Artemis heard Holly mutter

"Well, Hello to you too Commander," Artemis says tartly.

"Ah, I see that you have made contact with the Mud Boy," the Commander scowled.

"may I say that I am 24 technically an adult" Artemis interrupts.

Boys Holly rolls her eyes as the two men continue with their posturing. She realizes they can be here all day and never go anywhere.

"No, Artemis you are actually 21" Foaly retorted

"Yes, I may be mentally 21 but I an actually 24 according to my records and my birth date. Being in Limbo might have not aged though I am still legally 24" Shot back Artemis

Sighing Holly pulled out her Neutrino, Powering it up Holly shoots a warning shot at a glass vase.

"Holly! That was my mother's vase!" Whined Foaly as it shattered and fell to the ground.

"Major, holster your weapon before I rebuke your surface visa." threatened Trouble

"Oh and Congratulations on the promotion Major," Artemis says coolly

Holstering her Neutrino, Holly apologizes

"Sorry, but we can't do anything while you guys are bickering."

A cackle sounded from the screen. Whipping around Holly sees Artemis doubled over wheezing.

" Why are you laughing, Mud Boy" Trouble glares at the screen.

"It is just.." stammers Artemis. Artemis, Stammering? That's new.

"Out with it" demanded Foaly, as Artemis finally stopped wheezing and looked up.

"Nevermind, we have more important things to discuss, I just got a package too, Butler just gave it to me after checking it, he also says hello," Artemis said ignoring the question.

"did you get a note on it?"

"yes, how did you know?" Artemis asks his eyebrow raised

"some guesses"

"It is addressed to me, Holly, No.1, Qwan, and ..." Artemis splutters,

"Out with it" Trouble growls.

"It is addressed to Mulch and Julius Root"

"Oh, of course, Mulch and Julius get mentioned and I don't"

Holly felt the emotions inside her churn, as Artemis mentions her old Commander, that she watched get blown into bits by Opal Koboi.

"Julius died a decade ago" Trouble spat still glaring at Artemis.

"Arty, who are you talking to? You have been there for about 30 minutes babbling about some people and arguing about how old you are."

Artemis' sighs and he replies

"Beckett please can you go away I am in the middle of a very important conversation, I will play with you in like 21 minutes"

"Okay, I will be waiting for you and we will finally wrestle"

"Beckett I have a conversation waiting, we will wrestle in 21 minutes "

Holly stares at Artemis, since when did Artemis play with his brothers let alone wrestle with them.

"Wait, You're joking, right? Artemis Fowl, The Great Artemis Fowl the Second, Criminal

Mastermind, wrestles with a couple of 6 years old's?" Foaly snickers from the back of the room.

"Yes, I do play with my brothers sometimes Foaly, As I am sure Barry plays with his sister and brother Sheridan and Brendan"

"How do you know my kids' names?" Foaly asked mystified,

"well, you know I have a lot of free time so why not try to hack into the LEP security system and I may have gone through some of your personal stuff," Artemis says with his famous vampire smile.

"Honestly, Foaly you're losing your touch, it was easy going through the firewalls"

Trouble was clearly mad, his face would have made Beet Root proud.

"We are getting off track! We need to find out about this book and who sent it to us."

Holly was half tempted to pull out her Neutrino again, but then an alarm went off.

"D'arvit, Myles you know I have alarms in my room," mutters Artemis raising his voice at Myles

"Paranoid, much?" Trouble whispers into Holly's ear, causing her to laugh

"Well, after all, our adventures I would probably be too, with Koboi almost killing his family, coming back from the dead and on top of that a mini Artemis by the name Myles trying to sneak into his room every day" Holly whispers back.

"wait, Myles is outside I see him walking in right now and Butler is cooking, Beckett is with Myles, Mother and Father at the spa" Artemis stated. his face paling (if his already paper white face can pale any more) Artemis started to say,

"Com-" and the reception link went silent.

"Artemis!" Holly exclaimed

Foaly started working on his computer, after several seconds Foaly muttered a colorful string of words.

"what?" Commander asked

"Artemis just disappeared into a cloud of gold dust. and then everyone else in the Fowl Manor, Including his parents that were on their way home from the spa" Foaly explains, people don't just disappear into gold dust thought Foaly.

Then Holly, Foaly, Trouble, Mulch (who was in the middle of eating Juliet's cake in the Fowl Manor), No.1 and Qwan (they were n the middle of levitating a poor elf) busted into gold dust.

A/N: What happened to Artemis and co.? What's with the gold dust? also Please review, this is my first story ever and first fanfic constructive criticism welcome. *I basically gave it away in the beginning(if you bothered reading it)