Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters; they belong to Fox and the other respective owners of the show New Girl. With that out of the way, enjoy the story and check the Author's Note at the end of the fic for any more notes!
Most of the nighttime questions that Winston Bishop has are unmerited in addition to borderline ludicrous, but Aly must give her boyfriend merit on this one, as it could actually be considered a decent question for once.
"Hey, Aly?" Winston whispers into the night, flicking on the lamp he keeps by his bedside for those nights when he gets absolutely petrified regarding the darkness surrounding him.
"Hmmm?" Aly practically groans, having been in the middle of deep sleep before Winston's voice so rudely snapped her out of her dream of their future together. "What is it, Winston?" the female police officer inquires, opening her eyes and blinking rapidly in order to get them adjusted to the light streaming from the lamp.
"I thought of another question I had!" Winston nearly shouts, turning over to face Aly, his eyes lit up in excitement as they do every time he comes up with another one of his nighttime inquiries he seems to get nearly every time Aly sleeps over at the loft.
"And it couldn't wait until sometime after…." Aly pauses here to look at the clock before finishing her statement. "2:49 A.M.?" she continues, fixing Winston with a pointed glare, knowing that the two of them have an early and full day of police duties in the morning.
"Nope! It's been puzzling me, and I think it's one you may know off the top of your head!" Winston continues to grin, looking his partner in her eyes as Aly buries her head in her pillow.
"Fine. Get it over with where I can go back to sleep, puzzler," Aly mumbles, her voice muffled almost entirely by the pillow.
She sincerely hopes that this question does not turn into the nearly three hour debate she and Winston had one night two months ago about whether or not the song "I Just Can't Wait to Be King" was intended to say that Simba just wanted Mufasa to hurry up and die where the young Prince could become King of the Pride Lands. Such an idea had truly terrified Winston Bishop as he realized that the theories on the internet could be true, and it had taken all of Aly's strength and persuasion skills to get her boyfriend to believe that Simba did not intend on it to be a song to try and get his father murdered.
After what seems like an eternity to Aly- an eternity she could have been sleeping, keep in mind- Winston reveals his question.
"Is it illegal for a cop to grab another cop's gun?" the star basketball player inquires, totally serious about his question as he looks down on his beautiful girlfriend who desperately just wants to go back to sleep before they have to wake back up at 7 A.M. to be at the station no later than 8:30. "'Cause I've been thinkin' a lot about that since becomin' a cop, and now that we're partners and in a relationship I've been curious about what would happen if we accidentally grabbed each other's guns before we left the loft in the morning," he continues to ramble on, and Aly absolutely loves his passion for trying to solve every question that pops into his head.
The only thing that the female Los Angeles police officer does not understand is why these questions come to Winston only at night when they have a busy day at work that same morning. If she didn't know any better, Aly would go so far as to suggest that the stress of the looming job keeps Winston up at night to where he comes up with all of these bizarre scenarios to keep his mind off of the potential cases they could have the next day. Of course, she would never admit such thoughts to him, because Winnie the Bish is absolutely in a river of denial when it comes to his slight fears surrounding their police work. The rest of the loft is already incredibly paranoid that something is going to happen to their cat-loving, puzzle master of a friend as is without knowing that some days Winston himself harbors fears surrounding some of the more difficult cases such as homicide.
"Huh," Aly exclaims, rolling onto her back where she can stare at the ceiling, making Winston follow her move where he starts staring upwards as well. "I guess I never thought of that, Winston," she admits, positively stumped on this particular question of Winston's.
Most of them she could answer relatively easily, such as the Lion King themed one or what Ferguson must be thinking of all of the change that has come to the loft lately. Speaking of said feline, he is currently lounging on his rather expensive bed situated on the other side of the room, grooming his cheeks with the tenacity of a man trying to quickly shave before a date.
"How did you ever think of that question, Winston?"
"Well, you know that morning two weeks ago when we woke up super late because the power went out and our alarms didn't go off? The one where you asked me to grab you gun holster for you since you forgot it on my desk? Well, turns out, my gun holster was on the desk, too, but I realized how identical they look without our ID badges on them. So, I may or may not have picked up both guns to try and figure out which one was yours, but they both look almost identical, too!"
Well, that explains it. No wonder it had taken Winston nearly fifteen minutes to come back out of the bedroom that morning. At the time, Aly had assumed that her boyfriend was giving his daily salutations to Ferguson while telling the tom cat to behave while Winston and Aly were at the station. (And yes, he does do that every morning without fail.)
Aly thinks long and hard about the question Winston asked, her own mind becoming puzzled over the scenario and agreeing that he does make a good point.
"I don't know, Winston," Aly scoffs, a confused look on her face as she turns to face her boyfriend, their foreheads pressed together as Winston begins to stroke his large hands over her pale wrist. "I know it's illegal for a civilian to grab a cop's gun, but I have no clue whatsoever as to what the rule or law is on if another cop touches a cop's gun. Huh. Good one. You stumped me," she continues, closing her brown eyes as Winston moves his hands to cup her face instead of her wrist.
"Well, yeah! I knew that part. Man, the legal system is really jacked up sometimes, Aly!" Winston starts to shout again, but when Aly asks him to quiet down, the ex-pro basketball player silences himself to hardly a whisper. "So, what would you do if I accidentally did switch our guns that morning?" he asks, also confused by his own hypothetical question and hoping that Aly wouldn't get too mad at him if he did, in fact, make that mistake two weeks ago.
"I guess since neither of us know the law, Winston, I can't do anything about it," Aly admits, a yawn overtaking her voice as she tries to slip back into sleep before the day begins in a few hours. "Besides, we don't even know if it's illegal or not," she trails off, sleep already starting to try and pull Officer Nelson back into its grasp.
"You mean you wouldn't arrest me?" Winston jokes, cocking his eyebrow while smiling, not knowing that Aly's eyes are already closed.
"Are you into that sort of thing, Bishop?" Aly sleepily mumbles, and it is then that Winston realizes that he doesn't need to pester his girlfriend with any more questions where they can both get some amount of sleep before their frantic day at the station.
"Good night, Aly," he sweetly whispers, dropping a kiss to the crown of her head before slipping down in the bed beside her, one arm slung around her waist as the other moves to turn off the bedside lamp.
No, they didn't quite come to a valid conclusion on this nighttime inquiry, but Officer Winston Bishop knows that he will be able to come up with many more questions to keep his and Aly's minds as sharp as ever. (At least, that is the reason Winston tells himself as to why he asks a bunch of weird questions at such irregular times of the night.)
Author's Note: And there it is! My first New Girl story! I am actually on the last four episodes of Season Six, and I knew I just had to write this! Winston and Aly have such a cute and sweet relationship built on trust and dependability! I love them so much, even though Schmidt and Cece are my definite OTP of the whole show. Anyway, this fic was inspired by a conversation my sister and I had last Saturday while listening to Ava Max's new song 'Sweet But Psycho' on the way to my college's production of the musical 'Be More Chill'. My sister looked at me in total seriousness and asked "Is it illegal for a cop to grab another cop's gun?" To which I then responded "These are the questions that keep me up at night." Thus, this fic was born! Madison, this one is for you; thanks for inadvertently inspiring me with that random question! I hope you all enjoyed this story; reviews are always greatly appreciated. Have an amazing day, afternoon, or night, my dear readers!