14The first things Hiccup noticed upon waking was the warmth of sunshine on his face, a throbbing in his shoulder, and a solid, familiar body at his side. Because of all these things, he was hesitant to open his eyes and face the day. After all he'd been through in his short life, didn't he deserve to just stay like this forever? Though the more he considered it, the more he realized…
Ouch.
The throbbing seemed to intensify as his nerves began to wake, and he furrowed his brow. Stupid arrow.
His eyes opened slowly, blinking to adjust to the brightness of the room, the sun streaking in from the hatch he had constructed to let Toothless in and out every day. The door was open and the sky outside was a beautiful blue. The dragon must already be out and about – Hiccup couldn't hear his heavy breathing. Hopefully he could get out there to join him soon enough - it would be a perfect day for a long flight.
As carefully as he could, Hiccup lifted his injured arm as high as he could from where it rested in its sling. He could only bring about a third of the way to vertical before the pain in his shoulder was too great. With a sigh, he let it fall back to the bed. Maybe no flying today then.
Hiccup then looked down at the woman next to him, her messy blonde hair covering most of her face from view. Still, he could see that Astrid looked stressed even in her sleep, her face pinched and her hand gripping his shirt tightly. Hiccup's heart hurt as he remembered the concern in her voice last night, that he might be the reason she was upset even in her sleep. He never wanted to cause her any fear, and yet… If he could have made it back to Berk last night without any intervention… but no. That wouldn't have made her happy either. She just wanted him to stop doing stupid things and almost killing himself.
As he watched her, taking in the soft lines of her face, Astrid began to shift beneath him. She made a small sleepy noise, pulling herself closer to him, and her eyes slowly slid open. She raised her head to meet his eyes, and Hiccup smiled fondly down at her.
"M'Lady." He said, his voice rough and thick with sleep.
Astrid stared at him for a minute, expressionless. Her blue eyes were searching his, though what they were looking for exactly he had no idea. So he just waited.
And waited.
After a few moments, Astrid pushed herself higher on his chest, so their mouths were only inches apart. Still he waited for her to make a move - Hiccup knew her well enough to know that this could still go either way. She furrowed her brow, still searching his eyes.
"I should hit you." She said softly, her lips turned into a scowl.
"You should." Hiccup replied, his good hand reaching through her hair to rub the back of her neck. "I didn't mean to scare you, Az." His voice was soft, thoughtful, careful.
Astrid watched him for another minute before closing the gap between their mouths, breathing him in deeply as she kissed the remainder of sleep from his brain. Lingering against him after their lips parted, she rubbed her nose against his cheek.
"You always scare me, Hiccup." Her lips ghosted against his skin as she spoke. "You scare me with your recklessness, your stupid bravery, your determination to make sure no one ever has to suffer…. Except you always seem to be the one that ends up suffering." Astrid drew back, her eyes soft. "I just wish you were even a hair as thoughtful about your own well-being as you are about everyone else."
"I'm sorry, Az, but it's an occupational hazard." He replied with a wry smile. Pulling back, Astrid scowled.
"Don't quote your father to me, Hiccup, there's a difference between a calculated risk and a reckless death wish. You're our chief now, we need you alive."
Hiccup let his head fall back to the pillow, his eyes searching the thick logs that formed the ceiling of his father's – now his, though it felt strange to think of it that way – home. Strong and sturdy, just like his father had been. When he was younger, even just a few years ago, he had thought that Stoick was so brave, reckless, impulsive, his actions always motivated by his anger and an instinctive notion to do what was right. Once he began to pick up the reins his father had left for him, he realized just how much calculation had to go into every movement, every action. The village looked to their chief for reason, they trusted him to act responsibly…
He closed his eyes and his hand unconsciously gripped Astrid tighter to him. "Astrid…" He started, swallowing thickly. "You gotta realize… I don't know what I'm doing." Astrid shifted against him, resting her chin on his chest. "All those years of rescuing dragons from Viggo and winging it…"
"But we didn't 'wing it', Hiccup." Opening his eyes to watch Astrid shift into a sitting position by his side, she ran her fingers in circles on his chest. "We strategized. For months, if need be. We drilled, practiced things over and over again. Yes, there was always a certain element of surprise, but when you tell your soldiers what to do, they know to do it. Idiots though they can sometimes be, they will follow your lead, because they trust you."
Hiccup's eyes drifted back to the ceiling. "I don't…"
"Babe, you got hurt last night because you second guessed yourself when you shouldn't have. You second guessed your team." Astrid leaned forward to press a soft kiss to his temple, similar to the way she had the night before. "You aren't used to thinking of yourself as a leader yet, Hiccup. But everyone else believes in you, in what we're doing. They wouldn't have left anyone behind."
Strangely overwhelmed by that statement, Hiccup simply reached up with his good hand and cupped Astrid's cheek. Gently guiding her back down to himself, he tried to shift to meet her halfway only for a bolt of pain to wrack through his side. He flumped back to the pillow, his hand falling to his shoulder.
"Sweet mother of Thor…" He grumbled through gritted teeth. "That bites something fierce."
Astrid laughed softly in sympathy. "My poor little chief…" She said, leaning down to rest on one elbow by his head. "I'll make it easy for you." Leaning over, she touched her lips to his in an act of devotion that spoke more than words ever could. After his mind was good and fuzzy, despite his protests, she slipped from the bed and padded to the kitchen to brew some more willow bark tea. Hiccup allowed himself to close his eyes for a moment, breathing in the remaining scent of her.
He loved Astrid beyond reason, beyond logic. She made him as crazy today as she had years before, his draw to her never waning, always growing. He couldn't believe she was willing to stand by his side, even after all the craziness, all his hairbrained schemes and misadventures. Even better, she kept him in check. He could always trust her to give him her honest opinion, to call him out when he wasn't thinking properly. He trusted her opinion above all else.
Slowly dragging himself into a sitting position, he looked around for his prosthetic. Normally he kept it right at his bedside in case he needed it quickly. Astrid knew that, she'd spent enough nights by his side to know it. And yet it wasn't there.
"Astrid? Where's my leg?" He called, wincing as he curled his body to look under the bed. "Odin help me…" The pain in his shoulder made his head spin, but he was determined. "Astrid?" He called again, sitting upright and taking a deep breath to push through the pain.
"If you think you're getting out of bed today, you're insane." He heard from the lower level.
"Oh come on, Astrid…" He groaned. "I've got things to do!"
"Don't even try, Gothi's orders."
"I'm the chief!" He exclaimed, looking around again in the hopes that maybe she'd just placed his leg out of reach. His mobility was pretty limited, but damned if he wasn't going to try.
"Tough shit! I don't care!" Her voice was heated, but there was a touch of laughter to it. Hiccup scowled.
"Hey, I thought you weren't mad at me!" Frustration and helplessness brewed in his chest, but he felt stupid arguing with air.
"Never said that!" Astrid called from below. "I'm definitely mad at you!"
Hiccup sighed, flopping back against his pillows in defeat. His shoulder stung at the action, but he refused to react in case she could hear him. "What is this mutiny..." He muttered.
"What did you say?" Astrid began walking up the stairs, carrying a large mug. Her brow was furrowed again, but he could tell it was only half-hearted.
"Nothing, my dearest." Hiccup said innocently, "Though I do think it's unfair that you're taking advantage of my disability."
"I repeat, tough shit." Sitting beside his bed, Astrid presented him with the steaming mug. Hiccup curled his nose up at it and she laughed at him. "Come on, babe, drink up and you'll feel better." She placed the mug on his side table and helped him to sit up. Despite her gentleness, he felt the pain ricochet through his body and bit back a moan.
"I really do hate this stuff." He stated as Astrid handed him the mug. Hiccup's hatred of willow bark stemmed from the days after the battle with the green death, where he was forced to drink it multiple times a day to cope with the pain in the remainder of his left leg. He had to drink it so frequently that it made him nauseous, and even smelling it would cause him to gag. Unfortunately for him, he had a particular talent for getting himself hurt, so while he hadn't needed it to that severity in a long time, he'd never fully recovered from his distaste of it.
"I know you do." Astrid replied. Still he took a sip of it to appease her, fighting the urge to shudder.
"You're really not going to let me out of bed today?" Hiccup asked, widening his eyes in a pathetic attempt to win her over.
She smiled at him softly and leaned over to kiss his brow. "Not a chance." She said. "I've already rescheduled your meetings for the day."
Hiccup rolled his eyes, but secretly he felt relieved. He felt more worn out than he would care to admit. "Would you at least bring me the papers from my desk? There are a few treaties I need to review." Astrid nodded, rising from the bed.
"Of course." She said. "Keep drinking that though." She started to make her way down the stairs again, her bare feet padding softly on the steps.
Hiccup, feeling overwhelmed at the domesticity of the moment, felt something tug at his stomach. "Astrid." He called quietly, and she paused, only her head and shoulders visible to him.
"Hm?" She looked at him curiously, searching his eyes again.
"Will you stay with me?" Hiccup asked, feeling slightly nervous in his ask. She was a busy woman, she carried a lot of responsibilities, and yet, he felt an unmistakable pull to keep her close in that moment. "At least part of today?"
Astrid's face softened and she smiled. Without responding, she descended the remaining steps and Hiccup heard her rummaging around on the lower level for a moment before she returned with a stack of papers, his sketchbook and pencils. She lay the items by his side and nestled in beside him, and, picking up one of the many documents, she began reading it without a word, a soft smile on her face.
Feeling incredibly content despite his pain, he took another long drink from the dreadful tea and placed it back on his side table, pressing a long kiss into Astrid's hair before picking up another set of papers.
Maybe there were worse ways to spend a day.
This really didn't want to be written. Fingers crossed it didn't come out forced. Comments and reviews are always appreciated.