"Master, when am I going to meet my new user? It's boring being stuck in those earrings all day, and I want to see the world again!" Tikki was desperate to escape the tiny confines of her jewellery, she wasn't afraid to say so.
"Now now, Tikki… the best things come to those who wait!" No one could make hoary old cliches sound as fresh as Master Fu. "You'll get given to your destined to due course! And here's something to get excited about for later… she lives in a bakery!"
"W-What? You mean, where they make cookies? Hurray!" A very sweet-toothed Tikki began pirouetting in midair. The best thing about being a kwami? No tooth decay. "But now you've just increased my excitement level even more. Couldn't you just leave me in her bag, or something? You know, like you originally planned?"
"No, I'm afraid there have been some unexpected… complications there." growled Wang Fu, as he cursed his big mouth on public transportation. "I fear her parents will be on high alert, and check it every second for the Miraculous. And if they throw it away… I fear it may be lost forever, or even worse... Hawkmoth may get his grubby mitts on it."
"Ooh nnooo! We don't want that." wailed Tikki, extremely mindful of the powers the madman would get if he possessed both the earrings and the ring. After all, Fu never shut up about it. "We'll do it your way. In the meantime, let's hope there's no akuma emergency that needs her help, because otherwise we're, uh…"
"...We're screwed." Master Fu finished the sentence for her, as Tikki was highly averse to using 'foul' language. "Come Tikki, back into the Miraculous now. I must plan my next move with the utmost care… and that will require at least twenty-four hours of intense meditation."
"Okay, master. Good luck!" Tikki waved goodbye with one of her cute little nubs, before retreating back into her magical object.
In the meantime, Wang Fu set up his little room perfectly for a session of such massive brooding that it would even put Batman to shame.
First, he lit the scented candles.
Then, he closed the curtains.
Finally, the lights were turned off, and his CD player was turned on. What would he listen to this time to unwind? Pan-pipe Melodies? 'Dolphins During Mating Season'?
No, 'Sounds of the Brazilian Rainforest'. Nice.
Unfortunately, he was just getting to the part where the orangutangs beat their chests and the toucans squawked, before his peaceful sabbatical came to a crashing end.
You see, due to a tragic complication involving the last evil butterfly not being properly de-akumatized, the infection had now spread beyond the first victim Ivan…
...And now, there were many giant rock monsters smashing up Paris with wild abandon, including the very building Fu resided in now.
As you can imagine, it's a bit hard to reach mental nirvana or even make beans on toast with this kind of obtrusive racket all around you. The old Chinese man had no choice to emerge from his hypnotic trance, switch the lights back on, and say in a very clear distinct voice…
"Oops. We're screwed."
AUTHOR'S NOTE: Well, it looks as though this story is doing well enough for me to keep doing it. Hopefully, the kind of enthusiasm I can now muster writing this can spread to my other fics as well. Some are in dire need of updating, after all.
Remember: the more people that follow, favorite or comment on this, the quicker the updates will be! See you soon ^^