Hi Guys

I'm finally back. I have a couple of rip roarers I've been penning for a while for you. This first story is almost completely finished but because RL is so very manic (kids, hubby, work, remodelling of bungalow to house, yada, yada, yada…) don't expect me to be able to update too often – probably once a week going forward (said she, with her fingers crossed)

For those of you who know me, it's angst, angst, angst all the way (until it isn't, obviously ) and for those who don't - welcome on board…

Cheers

Sarah xx

PS R&R's make me post faster, just sayin'

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Hello from the Other side – by Adele

Hello, it's me
I was wondering if after all these years you'd like to meet
To go over everything
They say that time's supposed to heal ya
But I ain't done much healing
Hello, can you hear me?
I'm in California dreaming about who we used to be
When we were younger and free
I've forgotten how it felt
Before the world fell at our feet

There's such a difference between us
And a million miles

Hello from the other side
I must have called a thousand times
To tell you I'm sorry for everything that I've done
But when I call you never seem to be home
Hello from the outside
At least I can say that I've tried
To tell you I'm sorry for breaking your heart
But it don't matter, it clearly doesn't tear you apart
Anymore

Hello, how are you?
It's so typical of me to talk about myself, I'm sorry
I hope that you're well
Did you ever make it out of that town
Where nothing ever happened?

It's no secret that the both of us
Are running out of time

So hello from the other side (other side)
I must have called a thousand times (thousand times)
To tell you I'm sorry for everything that I've done
But when I call you never seem to be home
Hello from the outside (outside)
At least I can say that I've tried (I've tried)
To tell you I'm sorry for breaking your heart
But it don't matter, it clearly doesn't tear you apart
Anymore

Curled up on her well worn sectional, deep in the shadows that only the end of a very long day brings, the curly haired, blue eyed woman pulled her cuddly sock clad feet up and hugged her tired and faded sweat pant covered legs. A small side lamp on the battered table at the end of the sofa haloed her profile as she started to press the keys on her cell phone. Halfway through she stopped and stared at the number that was starting to build on the display. Could she do it?

How could she not. But it had been so long.

Too long.

Beyond the point of no return too long.

She deleted the numbers. Slowly. One by one. Caressing the keys as she watched the digits disappear from the display before gently laying the phone on the cushion beside her as if it were the most precious thing in the world and perhaps, just perhaps at that moment…

It was.

Pulling herself into a tiny ball her heart broke for the millionth time. Tears fell not for the first time, as she gave herself over to her pain and sobbed quietly.

For the questions that would forever go answered.

For the accusations that had torn her apart.

For the future she'd lost.

For the family who'd been left behind.

For the hurt that just refused to go away.

Just as her almost silent sobs subsided, the pitter patter of little, perfect feet and the feeling of a tiny warm body draping itself over her forced her to pull herself together.

"Mommy?" The child questioned as it squeezed her as tightly as its little arms would let it.

A tiny tug and the little scrap of humanity that loved her unconditionally was enveloped in her arms. Testament that at some level, somewhere, she'd once done something right.

"You're supposed to be asleep, Gorgeous Girl." She chastised half heartedly.

"Mhmm." Came the sleepy reply, "Bu-bu tol me to gif you a hug."

They cuddled for a while longer and Steph felt the moment when her two and a half year old daughter began to drift off "What would I ever do without you, hmm?" she asked softly as she smoothed her hands repetitively across the dark tangles that fluffed round her daughter's cherubic face.

Charlie snuggled in deeper and let out a soft contented sigh "lub you, Mama." She breathed out as she drifted off to the land of milky dreams.

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