It was the first day of the new school year in the Y Universe Royal Woods, Michigan and it was almost time for the students to go home. Oddly enough, Ronnie Anne and Sid were there even though they live in Great Lakes City or whatever it's called. As they were walking through the halls, they passed by a very young boy sitting down by the girls' bathroom. Ronnie Anne couldn't help but stop and look at him because of how much of a déjà vu his physical appearance gave her.
"Lincoln, is that you?!" Ronnie Anne asked, not understanding why he was wearing an unusual outfit and wondering where his dimples went.
"No." the little kid answered. "Do you know him? I haven't seen any of the episodes that you're in."
"Well, we're getting our own show in October, so you had better watch that too." added Sid.
That sales pitch was cut short when Lincoln & Clyde (I'm not calling them Clincoln McCloud. That's dumb. There shouldn't be more than one C in the last name.) stepped out of class. Lincoln was irritated that he had to go home now. This return to going to school was his first day away from Izzy, a little girl who recently moved into his house, since the day he met her.
"Huh?" Lincoln said with his attention shifted to something else. "Ronnie Anne? Sid? Prune Juice? What are you guys doing here?"
"Your name is Prune Juice?" Ronnie Anne said in confusion as she glanced at the Lincoln lookalike.
"Why is everyone always so surprised when they learn that?" he rhetorically asked.
"You're probably wondering who he is." interjected Clyde . "He's some kind of alternate baby version of Lincoln from another dimension." he explained.
"Universe!" Prune Juice angrily corrected because his big sister told him to never let anyone make that mistake.
"Right, universe. Sorry."
Wanting to give a more accurate answer, Lincoln chimed in with "You know who the Specials are, right?"
"Those weird flip-flopped versions of your sisters and parents? Yes." his girl friend replied.
"Well, the Special parents finally got their first son." finished Lincoln.
"I see. And to answer your question," Ronnie Anne said to get things back on topic. "Sid heard about the play your school's doing and wanted to audition for it."
"Are people who don't go to school here allowed to be in it?" Sid asked, planning on auditioning either way.
"If the director thinks you're good enough, she probably won't care that you don't go here." answered Clyde.
"Nice." Sid said as three kids, each wearing a LeBron James jersey, walked by her and repeated that word.
Not wanting to keep Lincoln waiting any longer, PJ changed the subject by saying "I am here because I wanted to see what school is. I was gonna go to Luan's school, but she kept saying I don't want to."
"You're not here by yourself, are you?" Lincoln asked, worried about his counterpart.
"No. Lisa brought me. She's in the bathroom." answered PJ, once again talking about his sister, not Lincoln's.
"I've lost interest in this." Sid interrupted. "I'm gonna go audition for the musical now.
"Me too!" everyone except for Clyde was surprised to hear Lincoln say that. "Niece Lillie told me that maybe if Izzy watched me give a bad performance in it, that would make her want to move out. I think that's a really stupid idea, but everything else I've tried hasn't worked, so I'm desperate. Besides, this means I'll get to stay away from Izzy for a little bit longer, which is always good news."
"Alright, you suck. Izzy's awesome! If anyone from her daycare is bad, it's Cody." Sid responded despite the fact she hadn't actually met, or even knew anything about, Cody. "Freaking Cody!"
"Yeah, about that." Lincoln butted in. "The fact you're friends with a 4-year-old you're not related to at your age is just plain wrong."
"Wow. You were there for that little adventure we had together and you don't understand why we would be friends. That's on top of the fact that me and her both work at my mom's zoo. I know I already said this, but you suck."
Lincoln wasn't going to dignify that with a response. To make that clear to her, he turned around without saying anything and began walking to where the auditions were being held, his right arm swinging back in forth to show his anger and frustration. Clyde followed behind him. He would text one of his dads about why he was staying at school late as soon as he got the chance.
Before Ronnie Anne and Sid left, Prune Juice told them he'd see them in a few minutes after Lisa was done in the bathroom and she could carry him to the auditions.
"Why does going to the bathroom take so long?"
"I don't know. Maybe humans just really like it in there." PJ's toy Pokémon said to him telepathically.
"Using diapies is so much faster. I hope I never start using the bathroom."
Sid stepped on stage and lowered the microphone down to her height, eager to begin her audition.
"Hello, my name's Sid. Stop thinking about Toy Story. When I heard about this musical, I decided to audition for it because it sounded like a good way to distract myself from my thirst for BLOOD! I would like to be one of the chicks who sings the theme song."
"You have to audition first." said Mrs. Bernardo, the director of the musical. This prompted Sid to begin singing.
LITTLE SHOP OF HORRORS!
LITTLE SHOP-A HORRORS!
"STOP!" Mrs. Bernardo screamed, not letting Sid finish. What a jerk! "Your singing is so bad, I'd rather listen to Old Town Road."
"That's not scientifically possible!" PJ's sister Lisa shouted from her seat.
"But the only person left who hasn't auditioned yet is a boy and no one else has auditioned for the role you're after. So unless he is, the part is yours."
"YES!" Sid cheered as she jumped and spun in the air.
"I'll also have to change it to just one singer instead of three like it's supposed to be, so...Yeah, I'm not happy about that."
"I know I'm supposed to get off the stage now, but I have a question. I heard there's a scene where the main character chops up a guy with an ax. Is that true?"
"Yes. He then feeds it to the giant plant because it likes eating blood."
"For real? Hhhm. Maybe I should try out for the plant instead."
"Sid!" Ronnie Anne shouted from her seat. "Get off the stage! What you're saying is the exact opposite of why you wanted to do this in the first place. They wouldn't use real blood anyway."
This got Sid off the stage and she sat down next to the others. Lincoln stood up and got on stage since it was his turn to audition now. When he began to recite his lines, Sid was surprised by which character he chose.
"He wants to be the main character? Doesn't he know that means he'll have to kiss a girl?"
"Hey, Ronnie Anne," Lisa interrupted. "I'm pretty sure I already know that the answer to this question is 'No,' but would Lincoln getting the part make you want to play the character he kisses?"
"Not at all." responded Ronnie Anne. "Me and him are just friends. I'd rather be tied to the side of a car that's driving into a volcano while I'm being shot at in my eyes with lasers and being forced to listen to dubstep remixes of Weird Al songs than kiss Lincoln."
Lincoln overheard this and it made him drop his script. He looked at his so-called friend from across the room, but she could still see the distraught in his eyes.
"I mean, I can't stand the idea of kissing you either, but I would never say it's that horrible." Lincoln said, not caring that he was saying it into the microphone.
"No, wait...It's not...I didn't mean..." Ronnie Anne had a tough time responding.
"Mrs. Bernardo, can I have a minute to go cry in the dressing room?" asked Lincoln.
"You can have 45 seconds." That was close enough for him, so Lincoln took the offer.
"What is kiss?" Prune Juice asked.
"This!" Sid responded. She grabbed Clyde by his face, puckered her lips, and kissed him. This went on for 14 seconds before she finally let him go. His jaw dropped and his eyes got wide as he touched his cheeks. "You thought your first kiss would be Lori, but it was I, Siddo!" Sid added while pointing at herself and giving herself a nickname.
"Sid, it's not okay to do that." Lisa said as Clyde ran away while calling Dr. Lopez.
"I had to demonstrate what kissing is for your brother, now didn't I?"
"I would've preferred he didn't learn yet, actually."
"So that's what kiss is." PJ said with a reaction that was late because he only now got a chance to talk. "I saw Lana do that once. Luan said it's super gross."
"Well, your Luan is massively weird." said Lincoln as he got back on the stage. "I do not at all understand why she doesn't laugh at her own jokes and ask people if they get them like the real Luan."
Lisa slowly stood up due to the shock this statement caused her. "I'm sorry. Did you just refer to Luan "April Fool's Day Ruiner" Loud as 'the real Luan?'"
"Well, she did come first." the boy in an orange shirt replied. "Sounds like she's the real one to me."
"Your sister and mine are both equally real!"
"Okay, that's it." the director interrupted. "I can't take this anymore. Someone kick her out."
A tall, muscular man sitting behind her grabbed onto Lisa and chucked her through a window. The glass of the window shattered and Lisa's glasses fell off as her face planted into the hard concrete ground. She was okay though.
Also, Lincoln got the part.
That kiss was all that was on Clyde's mind for the rest of the day. No one he talked to about it were able to help him determine how to move past it. Not his dads, not Lincoln, not even Dr. Lopez. When he went to bed that night, he kept having a nightmare, waking up from it, and then having another very similar one when he went back to sleep.
In these dreams, Clyde would go on dates with Lori (that she would never actually go on with him), but then she would slowly transform into Sid in a graphic and disturbing fashion. Clyde of course didn't know it, but these dreams were slowly implanting a special version of amnesia into his brain that would take hold on him...in the morning.