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The Least Bunny could Do.

If there was one thing Bunny was not, it was stupid.

But at the same time, she seemed to have inherited her mother's penchant for attracting attention from the disease of Gotham's underworld. Honestly, as she sat in the back of the police car on the way home, Bunny could not work out what had possessed that gang of thugs who'd gone to so much trouble and kidnapped her for a ransom why they had picked her.

Looking back she had no idea why she had expected them to let her go either since they hadn't said anything about that while she had been tied to an aeroplane's wheels with something tied around her mouth. At the time she had just assumed they would let her go.

Bunny wondered idly what was going to happen to the gang, but truthfully she hoped they were sent away for a long spell in prison. A very long spell. Bunny considered herself extremely lucky Batman had saved her.


As she sat in the back of the cop car, Bunny's heart went out to her rescuer. Batman was seen as a legend in the city, and indeed around the world. Indeed, Bunny had grown up hearing about the legend. She knew he had saved the city on dozens of occasions even if he was a vigilante. At the same time, he had also saved her mother.

Bunny had already been in her pre-teens when she had learnt of how her mother had stupidly dated the Penguin and faked a relationship with him in order to achieve notoriety because she'd been inspired to repeat an incident where another rogues' gallery member did something, she couldn't remember the details. But while she couldn't remember that part of her mother's story, she remembered how the Penguin, overhearing how her mother and her moronic friend Pierce had conned him, went on a rampage and ransomed Veronica before Batman saved her.

How stupid could you be?

Although she had never met the Penguin, Bunny had heard of him. She knew he had been dangerous, but surely it had occurred to her mother to not con a criminal?

The Penguin story, that time Harley Quinn had kidnapped her mother when she had gone on a rampage because of a misunderstanding at a department store only for her grandfather turning up in a tank of all things and Batman to save her, or that mess where the Mad Hatter had taken control of her mother's mind in order to brainwash Veronica into giving away millions of dollars for his retirement had made Bunny, despite being a debutante, try to avoid such chaos.

She didn't want to be brainwashed.

She didn't want to be shot at or being at the centre of terrible explosions where she could potentially be killed.

But most of all, she did not want to be kidnapped, and yet she had been.

From upfront, the conversation between the two police officers caught her attention.

"I hear the Batman was there," one of the cops, a man who looked like he was only three metres out of the entrance of a college, said.

"Batman is usually around," the second cop, a much older man, replied. "I remember when I joined up; Batman sightings were practically constant. Nowadays he's appearing less and less."

Bunny bit her lip as she remembered how Batman had saved her, although he was suddenly attacked by some kind of seizure that was clearly incredibly painful for him. Her heart had gone out for the man, the hero who had saved so many people and yet couldn't seem to help himself and stop the thugs from beating him up. With each whack from the wrench, Bunny had flinched with the impacts.

But the seizureā€¦.

Looking back Bunny realised Batman had been having a heart attack. It seemed so shocking, so unthinkable that someone who was said to have fought off dozens of fighters at a time, someone capable of swinging around Gotham's tower blocks on lines, could have a heart attack. And yet, no-one really knew for sure just how old Batman really was.

That's the reason why he hasn't been seen recently, isn't it?

"Why's that?" the younger cop asked, bringing Bunny's attention back to the cops and their conversation.

"Who knows?" the other cop shrugged, his voice suddenly indifferent as if the subject had been talked about in his presence more than once and had grown bored with the subject.

But then the younger cop spoke again. "I heard the Bat held a gun at one of the kidnappers," he said excitedly, momentarily forgetting or ignoring the kidnap victim was in the car though Bunny did not know and did not really care which.

"Don't be stupid!" the older cop snapped, his voice slightly louder than before while it took on a warning edge which was meant to clearly tell the younger cop to back off. "Batman doesn't use guns. Now drop the subject."

"But I heard them-!" the younger cop protested.

"You really believe them? A gang of thugs who tried to kidnap a young girl?" the scorn in the older cop's voice was so thick Bunny wouldn't be surprised if it could cover the city.

"But I heard them-!"

Bunny had had enough. She leaned forward fiercely. "That kidnapper lied. Don't forget, I was there. I saw everything. Batman came and saved my life. He did it all without using a gun!"

Bunny had not intended to get involved with the discussion which had quickly spiralled out of control for the two cops. At the same time, she had to carefully think through everything she had said. She had not told them about the heart attack Batman had suffered, nor had she told them about the beating he had gotten.

"Well, you would say that," the younger cop said at last after a seemingly long and awkward silence as he looked over his shoulder at where she was sitting in the back of the car, "he saved you-."

The older cop was just as tired and as annoyed by this entire stupid discussion. "That's enough!" he shouted and in the cramped space of the police car the sound echoed, and Bunny winced at the noise without him noticing. "Either shut up now or get out when I pull over!"

"You wouldn't?" the younger cop gaped at him in surprise, but Bunny didn't need to see the older man's expression to know he was deadly serious.

"Try me!"

The younger cop fell into a sullen silence; Bunny wondered if he was one of those people who hated Batman or just liked making trouble for others, but she didn't care. She tuned the two men out, uncaring whether they said anything at this point. She just wanted to get home and get into bed and just sleep. But she knew it wouldn't be that simple; her parents would drag her to the hospital and make sure she hadn't been molested by the kidnappers.

Bunny was just relieved she hadn't been touched, although it surprised her they hadn't bothered to rape her since they'd had no intention of letting her go once the ransom had been paid.

While she knew her parent's hearts were in the right place and they meant well, Bunny was not going to look forward to the battery of tests she was going to endure.

But in the meantime, she had to work out what she was going to say about her ordeal. She had no intention of telling anyone the truth; Batman had done a huge amount for the people of Gotham and his stance on not killing those who crossed him were well known, and she had too much respect for him not to blow it for him.

For the rest of her life, Bunny Vreeland would keep the secret, but at the same time when the furore died down and sightings of Batman became nonexistent until he was no longer seen again, no-one doubted what the high-society girl had to say on the matter of her kidnapping.