Author's Note: Like in the Summary, I wrote this when I was around 12 to 15. I'm almost 20 now and wanted to go through and comment on this as well as give advice. This whole story feels like it was written by a different person. I want to both shake who wrote this and just hug them. Not because it's 'cringey,' I don't care about that. It's because the who wrote this is suffering so much and doesn't even realize it. So if you feel the same feel free to comment and talk to me. You deserve to be happier.
This first part is just explaining what this whole story started from.
PS (()) means it's present me speaking. I'll try not to interject too much.
In the Beginning...
Actually, I don't know how this thing started. But we're ((we being two friends)) pretty positive it began at the ending of eighth grade. Or at least that's what my friend Austin says. But I think if you want to get really specific it started in the beginning of seventh with the birth of Special. A story Abigail, another friend, and I started. It was a fantasy series with the whole shebang of vampires, werewolves, and other mythical beings. We let your mutual friend Austin in on the plot and characters. Even having him proofread some chapters and one shots we wrote. When he wasn't reading or we weren't writing stuff for the story we talked about the characters. Like they were actual, interacting people, just being silly and dorky. But when Abigail left in the middle of eighth grade I guess Austin and I still wanted to talk about Special. So we continued the whole talking about characters stuff. But we sorta needed a setting/reason why and where we talked. Then The Agency popped up. It started with just us and some Special characters but with my nerdy love for the Ninja Turtles I couldn't help but let them in on the fun. There was no real ah-ha moment in the creation of this. It's basically a just a first person role-play Austin and I came up with. But I couldn't keep this between us, it's waaaaaay too intriguing to not let other people in on it. So enjoy!
AN: This gets weird. Just know only Austin and I are the only real people self-inserted into this mess. Most other's are my OCs. The rest are teenage mutant ninja turtle or Norse Chaos Gods.
The next is more explanation.
It's The Agency
That's it, plain and simple. It's catchy and easy to remember. It's been around from basically the beginning of time, and has no foreseeable end. If you guys know what S.H.I.E.L.D. is, the Agency is about ten times that. Plus we have hundreds, heck, even thousands of "powered" individuals working here. And we aren't constricted by copyright or dimensional barriers. And the only real qualification you have to have to work at the Agency is basically being able to accept the unacceptable. You're mind has to be pretty strange to be completely fine with working side by side creatures you were told growing up didn't exist. Having something like anxiety or depression or schizophrenia highers your chances of being hired. Basically you have to be somewhat crazy. ((THE FUCK)) I bet a bunch of you guys qualify.
AN: People with Anxiety, Depression, and Schizophrenia aren't crazy. Or weird. I mentioned those things because I had severe Anxiety/depression at that time and close friends with Schizophrenia. 15 year old me didn't word that well. If you have a metal illness know you're valid and brave.
No matter what you do for the Agency you're called an Agent. You could be a doctor, or even a janitor and still be known as an Agent.
I have no idea where they get these guys. But they're all stale and boring to be around.
I mean don't get me wrong, every now and again you get that one really interesting person talk to. But other than that social agents are pretty much just plain Janes. Nothing really to set them apart from one another. Plus they usually sound monotone, which is why I'm glad our interactions are usually short and sweet. And why I could never be a social agent.
They get the odd jobs, like sorting files for missions and new recruits. Or being janitors and stuff. They may not do terribly interesting jobs, but without them the Agency couldn't survive.
So you go Social Agents.
Basically how they sound. Technical Agents make all the cool gadgets and doohickeys that all the Field Agents use. Usually if they bunk at the Agency center they get a whole lab attached to their room for science and stuff. Every geeks' dream.
AN: Never explained Field Agents but from what I remember they were what I, Austin, and basically everyone else was. People who went out and saved people and shit.
If Austin had to sum me up in five words he'd only use three. Geeky, awkward, dork. And I can't say that's too far from the truth.
Not, oh I'm so awkward it's cute. I'm actually awkward. Most of the time I don't even know how to look at people properly. So do I look at their face or somewhere else? What if I look at them for too long and think I'm staring and judging them? Then how long do I look? Should I avoid eye contact? Would they think I'm being rude and ignoring them?
((THIS is what makes me want to shake 14 year old me. The "awkwardness" I described is fucking debilitating social anxiety. It isn't healthy or normal. Please if you feel similar, talk to someone. A parent, teacher, counselor, even me. You don't have to feel this way.))
This goes through my head nearly every time I walk down the halls. It's not so much that I worry about people judging me as it is not knowing what to do in social situations. Or even better I say completely random dark things.
As an example I was in French class not to long ago when my friend had brought a drink into class. It was raspberry tea, or gatorade, or something else. Anyways the point is it was red. Someone asked her what she was drinking and I proceded to say, not so quietly I might add, "IT'S THE BLOOD OF HER ENEMIES."
I got some strange looks, obviously.
So when someone is also awkward I tend to, I don't know... Bond, or understand them better, resulting in friendship. Which is why most of my friends are awkward dorks too. ((AKA Austin))
That one "friend"
Nearly every group of friends has one. That one incredibly annoying person that no one likes. That one guy who thinks they're best friends with everyone. But in all honesty no one even counts them as an acquaintance. They just tag along every now and again.
Yeah, his name's Cody. None of us even know his last name. There's a substantial hate that boils in your soul when he speaks. Every word is like a swarm gnats in your ears. Even the slightest movement sends prickles of irritation. Not to mention he pops up at the most inconvenient times.
AN: Don't really remember this character much, to be honest.
Not only do I hold the title of being the sole female in our little group of friends. I happen to be the shortest too. I also happen to be reminded about every day. Mostly by Austin. WHO SHOULDN'T BE TALKING CRAP BECAUSE IT WAS ONLY THE SUMMER AFTER EIGHTH GRADE HE GOT TALLER THAN ME AND IT'S STILL NOT MUCH. STOP IT AUSTIN I WILL DESTROY YOU WITH ALL THE PENT UP ANGER IN MY NORMAL SIZED BODY.
AN: Why so angry short stuff? lol. I haven't gotten much taller actually. I'm like 5'5" now? Was probably 5'4" or 3" when I wrote this.
"Okay... But you can't judge me!"
That was it. I had finally cracked. Donnie had wore me down. All those pleases and endless begging had fried my brain. Not to mention it seemed impossible say no to those big red puppy dog eyes.
I just hope he doesn't think I'm a psychopath, or anymore than he already does.
"They can't be that bad... or wait..." Donnie's face suddenly shifted as if he had sudden horrible realization.
"No no no no no no!" I waved my hands mortified at the idea. "They're nothing like that! It's just, my stories aren't all rainbows and unicorns. There's death and a lot of violence." ((I was so sad, I just wanna hug 14 year old me. But writing is a great outlet.))
"Oh, okay. You had me worried there for a second." He laughed. "But I know Austin wouldn't read them if they were... like that... At least I hope he wouldn't..."
"Wow, I never knew you to be so dirty minded." I teased.
"Yeah, I think Daniel and Austin are rubbing off on me."
"No it's called being a teenager. You'll get the hang of it eventually."
"I'd rather not. Anyways... hand over the journal!" Donnie commanded, sticking out his big green, three fingered hand.
I picked up the trusty Coca-Cola notebook I got as a present. I still smile every time I see it. While most girls my age want make-up and cellphones, I ask for paper and books. And as my father likes to state, "Keep it that way." ((OMFG YOU CAN'T BE SERIOUS. THIS JUST REEKS OF REPRESSED HOMOSEXUALITY.))
"Come on, I'm about to die from anticipation."
Donnie's voice snapped me out of my memory. I swallowed hard, nervous he'd never look the same way at me again. He already knows I'm insane. But now he'll know the extent of it.
"Remember no grammar Nazis! Or-"
"If they are half as good as your art. Or half of what Austin hypes them up to be, they'll be the best stories ever made." Donnie interrupted.
Finally I reluctantly hand over the journal. "Just don't expect Edgar Allan Poe or anything. But please tell your honest opinion."
I always accept constructive criticism. It helps improve your work. Why would you deny it?
Donnie's big puppy dog eyes quickly scanned the pages for what felt like only seconds. Then looked up at me.
"Wow..." He paused. Oh god. He thinks I'm a paranoid psycho. "That's really, really good. Its so thoughtful, there's meaning in it. Symbolism... Just... wow."
What? He got all of underlying messages? He understood...
"Yeah it was bit dark but that's the elegance to it. Deep, dark, meaningful."
I almost laughed, "Yes, t-that's what I was trying to do. You got it?"
"That nature, weather, isn't sporadic and evil, it's, precise and thought out. It's humans that see it as that, we assume it is because we are sporadic and evil."
"I-I... yes..." That was exactly my idea. ((I'm gonna fucking vom))
"I didn't realize you were..."
"What? That I'm a deep thinker? That I'm not a regular shallow teenage girl that can't find meaning in crap and can't function without social media?" ((BITCH))
Donnie's eyes went big. "No, I never thought you were shallow or dependent on elec-"
I laughed, "Don it's ok, I'm only messing with you."
He sighed in relief. I handed him another story. "Now these are just stories, you don't have to worry about me giving you a test for the deeper meaning." I joked.
Donnie flashed a weary smile and happily read the rest. But something shifted in the way he looked at me. Not like how I feared he would, but like he was trying to figure out what I was thinking. He finally understood I think with meaning, I'm not a normal teenage girl.
Not like he ever thought I was.
AN: #notlikeothergirls is bullshit. Liking stereotypical feminine stuff doesn't make someone shallow. And not liking feminine stuff doesn't make you better. Women are not 2D figures. I know it might seem like it with how media represents us but its not true. Try and be friendly with that super feminine girl in class. She's probably not as bad as you think she is. She has a brain and feelings just like you.
I guess I like coffee as much as the next girl. I drink every now and again, usually when I need a quick pick-me-up in the morning.
AN: No clue where the fuck this was going.
Side note for up coming story, Xzavier and Daniel are brother and Vampires. As well as OCs of mine. Also trigger warning for a description of a physical attack.
Austin was on mission in some foreign country I've never heard of. I had no idea where the brothers or Kendrick were. I'd lost track of them and didn't feel like searching around the dorms for them. So it was just me, Daniel, and Xzavier sitting in the lounge. Daniel and I were joking with each other and Xzavier... Well Xzavier wasn't his usual self. He wasn't reading, or reading,or even reading. His face was towards the ceiling with his eyes clenched shut. Sweat beading on his forehead. Acting like the slightest movement was unbearable. Maybe he has a headache. But something definitely wasn't right. He didn't even flinch when I mentioned books.
I snapped to get his attention."Hey Xzavier, you alright?"
His lavender eyes fluttered open and shut. He picked his head up then slouched over. "Uhh... no. No... I need... I need..." He mumbled incoherently.
Then suddenly Daniel jumped over the couch and ran to his room. What in the...
Xzavier fell forward on his knees clutching his head. He groaned painfully. Then huge bat wings burst from his back ripping his shirt.
I felt my heart drop. That's when it hit me. Blood. He needs blood. My muscles coiled. I took out the ball and chain I had stashed in my pocket.
Xzavier's head snapped up towards me. Revealing completely black eyes and long needle like fangs.
Yep I'm completely screwed. Vampires in blood lust are more dangerous than an atomic bomb. Especially to humans, such as myself. So unless someone comes and saves me pretty soon I'm not going to make it out of this.
He lunged for me, I swung the chain, the metal ball making his head snap back. And forcing him to stumble backwards.
He regained his balance and pounced again. Only this time missing my swing. He slammed me into the wall, pinning me with unbearable force. He parted his lips, revealing his mouth. Which seemed to be nothing but a black gaping hole with razor-like teeth.
I turned my head and with every second my body tensed. Anticipation of the bite was nearly sickening. But instead of tearing pain I felt the pressure from his body lift.
My eyes snapped open to see Daniel. Then Xzavier on his knees with a red bag in his mouth that quickly turned clear. Daniel gave him another bag, soon it's crimson contents were gone.
Xzavier's bat wings steadily dissipated and the black from his eyes disappeared like ink going down a drain. Xzavier gasped then went into a fit of coughing. Daniel helped his slightly younger brother to his feet.
"Come on. You're alright, lets get more food into you." Daniel coaxed.
Xzavier leaned tiredly on Daniel. But turned his head around to me.
"Oh, I'm so..." He reached his hand out but stopped midway. Like he thought I'd be scared. I was shaken a little but...
"It's okay, from now on just make sure you have enough blood in your system." I chuckled.
Xzavier's face shifted to surprise. What can I say? I'm a Field Agent, crazy stuff like that happens to me all the time.
AN: All you need to know about Kendrick is that he's a werewolf.
AN: Never wrote about Donnie turning himself into a human. But yeah, that apparently happened.
"It's just a hassle, you know?"
I laughed. "Yes I know. Did you forget that you are talking to me?"
That was it, he was cutting it off. His beautiful long wavy hair. It made me sad to think about it. I don't know what it is about guys with ponytails that I like. Which is hilarious considering that I have very short hair. And not, "Oh I have a bob, it's so short," No. I have a pixie cut, parts of my head are shaved. ((That's cuz you a butch baby girl.))
I didn't want to deal with my long hair anymore so in the sixth grade I cut it. So I can completely understand Donnie's struggle. It's also why I can't say anything. Even though I love his hair.
AN: Its's hilarious that every time I described my "perfect boy" they were always super feminine. Almost like... I was in to girls... huh... (Spoiler Alert I'm a lesbian now)
The secret basement
When you're in my line of work, it's best not to question everything. It just makes life easier. Which is why no one really questions it. It being an incredibly large, foreboding, unexplained, random building. Seriously it's just there.
There's the clean, modern dormitory, the training building, the generic Agency administration office, the head honcho administration office. And then there's that. The plain square, slightly deprecated, windowless, building.
AN: Yeah, I don't remember what this was about. I just know it was a long adventure with the entire group.
Finally everything was done. Boxes were all packed, loaded up, then moved to the new apartment.
And yes our apartment. Mine, Donnie's, Austin's, and Daniel's. We all share it now. But it's not some puny hole in the wall. Austin made sure that we, but mostly him and Daniel, had the largest dorm and that it be on the top floor.
Anyways us four were gathered around the coffee table, seeing how no one wanted to set up the dining table. Daniel had ran out earlier and got us all takeout. We were joking around when I said my classic line, "Austin, you're an idiot."
"Aw, but he's my idiot." Daniel laughed. ((Austin and Daniel are (were? haven't talked to Austin in a while) bisexual and in a relationship in this universe.))
"Thanks that makes me feel amazing." Austin sarcastically moaned as rolled his eyes.
"But you know she says that with all the love and care she has." Donnie chimed in, reciting one of my other classic lines.
He gave that adorable, dorky, toothy grin. It was especially cute due to the gap in between this two front teeth, and it made melt every time. He's just... so... amazing, cute, intelligent, everything. And I couldn't deny how well that boy knew me too. From pet-peeves, to habits. I think that's mostly because we had a lot of the same ones.
"Hello? Earth to ((NAME WITHDRAWN LOL))?" Austin called.
"Oh, sorry. Must have spaced out." I blushed.
"Are you okay? You've been doing that a lot lately." Donnie tilted his head in concern. It reminded me of confused puppy. Even more so because of his big reddish, brown eyes. Those amazing colored eyes, I wished my eyes were interestingly colored like his.
Daniel turned to me, "Oh she's fi-" But on his way to pat on the shoulder he knocked over cup, spilling his soda on me. Ice and everything. AND HOLY CRAP THAT'S COLD.
I gave a girly shriek and bolted up, trying to wipe the drink of my chest. SERIOUSLY THAT'S FREEZING.
"Oh sorry! Wait hold up I got this." Daniel apologized, and before I could even reply he had me by my arm pulling me to his room. Then had me sit down in front of his mirrored desk in a blink of an eye. He closed the door with an excited slam.
"Alright first thing first, take your shirt off."
My face got flushed at the idea, "What?! No!" Geez, wait till Austin hears this.
Daniel gave an irritated sound. "You know what I mean! Besides my heart belongs to Austin."
I couldn't help but laugh. "Yeah, yeah, I know."
Daniel walked over to his closest and pulled out a big gray sweater.
"You can wear this." He offered as he threw at me.
"Oh and here's some wipeies to clean yourself. Make yourself pretty for Donnie." He added.
Then for the first time I realized this was thought out.
"Wait, you and Austin planned this!"
"Yes, don't you think it's devilishly clever?"
I couldn't deny it, the whole thing was very clever. Which made me even more angry.
"I hate you and your little boyfriend too!" I said half jokingly.
I'd known they were planning something. I even suspected that it had to do with me and Donnie, but... I don't know, maybe I that they had more common sense than that. Not to push two people into a relationship they might not be ready for. Come on, until recently Donnie wasn't even human. Not to mention all of his insecurities. And was I even ready? It terrified me to think someone could ever care for me like that. It could complicate things. ((I blamed this on my parents parents being divorced and not having an example of a healthy relationship. But in actuality I was so apprehensive because I didn't actually like boys.)) But in the same breath... I did like him... ((No you didn't dumbass))
Daniel sent me to his closest to change. I shed my sticky shirt for his huge gray sweater, that was about twenty sizes to big. It hung loosely on me and didn't even cover one of my shoulders.
"Ta-da!" I said opening the closet door.
"Alright, next thing is to do something with that nasty hair."
My hand automatically shot up to my head. Stroking my hair self consciously.
"Sorry, I was working and moving heavy things. I wasn't really concerned on the state of my hair." ((Jokes on you your hair was always greasy))
"Don't worry, I'll work my magic."
Daniel sat me down in front of his mirrored desk. Taking out a spray bottle and small flat iron. He began spraying my head with the cold water. Then quickly straightened my dirty blonde hair. Finally he pinned my bangs back with two purple bobby pins.
"Ta-da!" Exclaimed Daniel.
"I can't deny, you are amazing." I complemented.
"Now go and get swept off your feet! Austin gave Donnie a pep talk and he should be in his room. So you know."
My stomach turned. What was about to happen? I feared he turn me down. Or even worse he wouldn't, I would. I'd spaz when he got close, I'd run out, leaving him hurt forever.
"Oh! One final touch."
Daniel popped a mint in my mouth, followed by strawberry chapstick on my lips. "Perfect!"
It's funny, I don't remember walking to his room, or opening his door. All I recall is suddenly sitting on his bed. Pins and needles of anxiety poking at my skin.
"Hey." I said.
"Hey." Donnie replied back.
"Do you need any help?" I offered, noting how delicately he emptied the final box.
"Nope, I got it."
Not wanting to slip back into awkward silence again I proceeded to say, "Muggles, how stubborn." ((Oh, screw JK Rowling BTW. We don't stan transmisogynists in this house hold))
Donnie did his classic cute, toothy grin. And again, I melted. I swear I'm made out of chocolate or something.
He then said his very own classic line, "You're crazy." Following it up with, "Besides, who gave you that amazing neon power? You know conveniently right before the whole secret basement thing? "
"Oh you know just some awesome guy. But you probably wouldn't know him." I smiled.
"Speaking of which," Donnie started. "I still don't have those schematics for the lightsaber." ((I'm as lost as you are.))
"You're still wanting to do that?" I asked, sickened by the idea of Donnie handling something so dangerous. The last people tried to recreate it all died. And they were elder trained professionals. I don't think I could bare it if he got seriously injured, or worse.
"Well, yeah. It's the whole reason we went down there in the first place." Donnie noted.
"I know, it's just that..." My voice trailed off.
"Look I know the history of them. What they caused. But," He looked up like he was visualising it, "wouldn't be amazing if I could do it? Being one of the only- not to mention youngest- scientist to ever make a lightsaber."
I couldn't help but smile at his giddiness. How excited he is... his big grin...
"I know that's amazing and I know you're more than smart enough. But," I stood up, focusing on the floor. "You might get hurt. So just be extra, extra careful for me? Please?"
"You care that much?" Donnie asked standing up to meet me.
I transfixed on his face. His fair skin, pouty bottom lip, huge red puppy dog eyes, and curly brown hair. I noticed how long it was getting. He'll have to get it cut again soon. Unless he was going to grow it out again.
I snapped my mind out of the distraction. Realizing how close he was. "Of course I care. I wouldn't be able to handle it if I lost you." My voice was softened with depression.
I felt Donnie's arms wrap around me. He's so warm. Relief seeped into me. He's right here, he's fine.
"I will never leave you." He whispered nearly to himself.
Everything felt slow, almost foggy like my mind didn't comprehend every detail and I didn't realise it. That was until I felt something on my lips. It was barely there almost like a feather brushing them. Then it pressed harder, but it was still light, like it was afraid it'd break me.
It was Donnie. He was kissing me... HOLY (insert any swear word of choice here) HE'S KISSING ME. ((gag))
He pulled back. Realization struck him. "Oh. OH CR- I'm sorry!" He let go of me, turning away. Slamming his palm to his forehead."God I'm such an idiot!"
This is it, the moment of truth. Do I do what my instincts tell me and run out of the room, leaving him heartbroken? Or tell him it's okay? But I do neither.
Instead I grab his hand, he turns. I put my other hand on his cheek and I kiss him, even harder that he kissed me.
I pull back once I think he gets the idea. "I'm not leaving either."
We stood there for a while. The only sound I could hear was my heartbeat ringing in my ears.
That was until he said, "So what does this make us?"
"I guess boyfriend and girlfriend. Wow, never thought I'd be saying that." The words felt foreign in my mouth. ((CUZ YOU GAY))
"I'd never thought I'd even talk to a human growing up." Donnie noted.
"Okay, okay. You win." I laughed. "Man, how am I going to tell my parents?"
I obviously couldn't tell them who he really was. I'd probably have to lie and say I'd meet him at school. Then I wouldn't be able to tell them we were together for another six months. They'd never believe me otherwise. Ms. Take-it-slow.
"Well I know Master Splinter will approve."
I smiled. "He will?"
"Yep, and I quote 'She's a strange young girl, but very respectful of ninjutsu and of our culture. She may even be a likely student.' End quote." Donnie said trying to do his best Splinter impression.
"Really? We've only meet once." I questioned.
"Well," Donnie blushed, "I sorta mention you every time I go home or talk to him."
"Aww, how sweet."
I gave him an extra squeeze. The rest of the night was spent talking about how our friends and siblings were going to react, or joking about. But it almost seemed too good to be true. That this amazing boy, that was so much more intelligent and extraordinary than me, could ever even put up with me. Much less be with me. But hey, if he's crazy enough to want me, I won't complain.
AN: I was so in love with my best friend at the time and so fucking deep in the closet I was having tea with Mr. Tumnus the fawn.
It wasn't a total disaster. Was I a little disappointed Donnie wasn't coming? Yeah. But I was with Leo, so at least I won't want to slit my partner's throat. Now if I was with Mikey, that'd be a different story.
Unluckily though it was a scout out. Some gangsters got into their head that they were hot shots and were trying to buy nuclear bombs. You know the usual. That's the reason me and Leo are on a roof instead of popping fireworks like regular teens do on Fourth of July. It's also the reason I'M ABOUT TO SHOOT SOMEONE IN THE HEAD OUT OF UTTER BOREDNESS. And is why the following text messages exist.
SSSOOOOO FREAKING BORED
NO ONES REPLYING
Come on I'm on a scout out and have absolutely NOTHING to do...
Donnie's working on those lightsabers, Kendrick refuses to use his phone, and I'm pretty sure Daniel's with you...
OH GOD... PLEASE DON'T TELL ME THAT'S WHY YOUR NOT REPLYING
EWW I'M SICK
Nothing. No reply. Though I sorta expected that with Austin. He rarely ever replies to me. But it sucks cause we're just watching a stupid house party one of the thugs is hosting to cover up the meeting about the bombs. Then in a last stitched effort I texted Donnie.
BUT I'M BORED...
Entertain yourself I REALLY can't text right now.
BUT YOU ALREADY ARE
"There he is." Leo said, pointing to our main target.
He was some Italian guy who's name I couldn't pronounce and the guy who's actually buying the nuclear weapons. The upside was the informative he's supposed to meet here is actually an undercover agent. Sorta like a bait car, only you know, for bombs. If this was a reality show this would be when the crook is circling the bait about to do something that will throw him into jail for a long time. I can't wait till we get him, maybe he'll put on a good show and cry.
Then with creepy intuition my earpiece sang the Agency jiggle. I swear the high heads are freaking psychic.
"Yello." I answered, not bothering to be too formal.
"Has the target been spotted?" The a voice on the other end of the call asked.
"Yep, just saw him."
"Noted. Now priorities have changed. It is now a phase two."
"Phase two?" Phase one, watching. Phase two, following. "As in following him into the party? As in interacting with other people? No no no no no."
"Agent. We are well aware of your social... disabilities... ((BITCH)) But we are also aware of your treatment for it. You have been given tools to deal with it and this is a direct order. You wouldn't want to get a spot on your permanent record would you?"
I hate being such a goodie-two-shoes sometimes. "You do realize this is me you're speaking to right? Me and parties mix like... snails and salt." Don't know why that popped into my head... "Like... life and happiness." Oh, that's a good one. "Like... like-"
"You have your orders." Click.
I groaned to myself. Man, I was about to come up with another good simile too.
"I could go in alone. If you want." Leo sweetly offered.
"No, no. I couldn't leave you alone. Besides that would be against protocol. Wouldn't want to get a spot on our records would we?" Good thing Leo's a goodie-two-shoes too.
"I just don't want you to freak out is all. I mean Donnie's told how you can get-"
"Leo, I'll be fine." I hope.
He was about to jump off the building until I said, "Wait we'll stick out like a sore thumb in there."
Noting my plain black tank top and blue jean short-shorts. I spiked my short blonde and blue hair into a mohawk. ((Yes I did actually have blonde and blue hair. Might be repressed as fuck but I had cool hair)) I went to do the same to Leo's jet black hair only to have it fall right back down. ((Oh Leo's human rn by the way))
"Geez, I still can't believe that you're human now." I confessed.
"Donnie said the transformation is only a week long. After that I can decide on whether to stay with the original or change back to... this." His piercing blue eyes clouded with confusion.
It was a difficult time for him. But I could tell he didn't want to talk about it right now. Being the eldest sibling, sometimes I can just tell these things. "If you want to talk about it later we can." I offered.
"Thanks. I- Oh wait, he's going in. Looks like he has backup too."
"Great, now he has bouncers."
I joked, taking a deep breath. Pushing out the conversation that happened just a couple seconds ago.
We jumped off the roof to the roof of the building with the party boiling inside. Leo, being the freaking ninja he is, stuck the landing with a somersault. While I had to use my neon powers as a cushion so I wouldn't break and/or sprain something. So I elegantly landed with a soft tap of my foot and bright pink lights streaming behind me. Which quickly evaporated afterwards. ((Oh, Austin and I got powers eventually. They were of a video-game with a title I can't recall rn. But the main character was Native American and had smoke/fire powers))
"You know if your power wasn't so obvious you'd be a great ninja." Leo laughed before sliding down the rain shoot like a fireman's pole.
I followed soon after, some stranger giving us a weird look. I immediately shot one back and they looked away confused. The power of not giving a crap.
We slipped unnoticed through the front door. Seeing our target and his goon squad marching upstairs. We nonchalantly followed. Stopping on a landing once we got a view of the room he just slipped into. Two big hairy men standing guard on the now closed door. Leo and I leaning against the wall trying to look like normal party goers.
Our target was only in his mid twenties. I guess he still had his partying streak in him. I wonder what happened to the last mob boss that they had to put this dude in charge so soon. This would be the part in the show when the unmarked units circle in.
Then what must have been a few minutes, the all too loud drone of Italian hip-hop music assaulted our eardrums. Trying to swallow my anxiety. When a boy pulling a girl by her hand up the stairs came barging by. They gave the bouncers a moment's glance and then giggled to each other. Continuing their search for a empty room.
Eww. ((You're GAY))
It was a few minutes after that, that a guy in his earlier twenties came walking up the stairs toward us. But it was quickly realized his focus was on me. He came and leaned his arm against the wall and got uncomfortably close to me. Then started saying something in Italian. I don't speak Italian, I know some french though. I was waving my hands and shaking my head.
"Je regrette. Je ne parle pas-"
I was interrupted by the stranger pulling me up the stairs by both hands.
"Hey jerk! Wh-" I started to protest before I heard a thunk. Like flesh on flesh. He released me and stumbled backwards falling down the stars. He gave a startled look and ran off.
Realization set in. Leo just punched the freaking crap out of him. Wow.
"Umm... I... I mean... T-thank you." I stuttered.
"Come on, I wouldn't let anything happen to. You're basically my sister. And Donnie would kill me."
That is so frigging sweet. I smiled. "Thanks Leo, and you are like a brother to me."
Leo ever so slightly motioned with his head towards the pair of guards that were now staring at us. "New orders. Phase three."
I laughed. Phase three; intervene. As in, punch people. We walked over to the bouncers who looked confused, then with swift karate chops to the neck they were both out like lights. So much for the extra muscle.
We came charging in only to find the undercover agent had already had him tagged and bagged him. We went over to walk him out. He looked pissed and hot tears were rolling down cheeks. This is the part where the audience is supposed to be laughing and think, "Shouldn't have done it in the first place!"
"Who are you the police? You work for the Fertailis?" He spat with a heavy Italian accent.
I couldn't help but laugh in his face. "You wish."
AN: This one wasn't too bad. At least it's finished. I was also in therapy at this time.
"Come on lovebirds!" Mikey shouted, continuing his seemingly never ending teasing.
Rage was buzzing throughout the inside of my skull. Every muscle in my body was coiled so much I'm thought a spring would pop out. Just like winding up a toy to tightly. That's how I feel, and if he doesn't stop it I'll snap.
"Mikey just quit it." Donnie replied calmly, then went back to his paperwork.
I have no idea how Donnie manages this. Staying so collected, especially with Mikey's non-stop aggravation.
"No way dude! This is way to good to pass up."
"What is?! Making fun of us?"
I nearly yelled.
"Completely. The idea of you guys together is hilarious!" Mikey shot back.
I slammed my hands against the table Donnie and I sat at. "Shut up!" Now I was actually shouting. I stood up, my stinging hands still planted on the table.
Then to a shocked looking Mikey I continued. "You know what?! You're just jealous! You can't stand the fact of he's so much better than you! That he's so intelligent and you're not! That he has a girlfriend and you don't! You're a sad excuse for a person compared to him! That's why you're jealous, and alone! And that's a whole lot funnier than us being together! We should be laughing at YOU!"
I inhaled deeply, out of breath from screaming so much, so fast. My muscles relaxed, all of the rage built up had been released in the insults. I felt so relieved, even a bit happy. I'd let Mikey have it, gave him what he deserved.
I focused back on his face, tears brimming from his baby blue eyes. His bottom lip quivering. He quickly stood then ran to his room.
Guilt set in. Great, just great. My greatest downfall is my sharp tongue. I know how to cut. How to critically wound with words. Especially to people I know, who I care about. I can tell their weaknesses, then strike them down when I get upset. Or even when I don't mean to. I can make them hurt. Just like I hurt him. But I always regret it later.
I straightened myself taking my now tender hands off the table. I made a move to follow but Donnie grabbed my hand.
"Wait a second, let him cool down. Besides-"
"He deserved it." Austin interrupted Donnie. I completely forgot he was over there sitting in one of the recliners in the lounge. Just across from us. "Don't apologize. Especially since it's true." He finished not lifting his head from his book.
The stubborn part of me agreed. The part which felt so relieved after the outburst. However it was overpowered by guilt.
"Just leave him be for right now. He'll get over it in a few minutes."
There's no way I'm going to let him
AN: Didn't even bother finishing on a full sentence. The fuck? Basically I learned a lesson about not being a bitch I learned with my little brother IRL.
I found it on one of my self tours around the new dorm building. On the floor above the basement. One large indoor pool. It was nice and toasty in there. Contradictory to the rest of the building.
I excitedly ran up to my room and threw on the generic gray standard issued Agency swimsuit. Stopping by Donnie's lab on my way back down to mention the fact. I even invited him to come with me, but...
"I'm a little busy right now."
Of course, he's much too busy trying to figure out how the lightsabers work.
"Alright, don't kill yourself over them." I replied.
And that's pretty much how I ended up here. Elegantly moving along with the cool water. It's one of the only places where I'm not a clumsy, fumbling, awkward, mess. I move comfortably, quickly, and gracefully, without sound. My thoughts, much like what surrounds, fluid and calming.
I think I belong submerged in water.
The sharp sound of the door broke my train of thought. For a second I hoped up it was Donnie.
But no, it was Raph.
AN: I don't remember where this was going at all. Probably no where good. But isn't it funny even after I had a boyfriend in the story we kiss once then almost never interact again? LMAO
Also this was around the time I really got into the marvel movies. And in order to impress my best friend/huge fucking crush at the time I read extensively about Norse Mythology.
Mischief and Lies
Being a VIP agent has it's perks. ((Special Field Agents)) You know the better rooms, no one breathing down your neck, and what not. But it of course doesn't come free. You're given more responsibilities. And one of those happens to include training new recruits.
Not all VIP agents get stuck with newbies. I just must be special. But everyone has to take a test to decide which type of person you work best with. So I'm not too stressed about who I got.
That was of course until they told me who it was.
"Loki." The plain social agent informed me.
"Loki who? Last name?"
I didn't believe her. "Loki as in Loki, Loki? As in the Prince of Asgard? As in Loki the Frost Giant? Adopted son of Odin? Brother of Thor? The god of mischief and lies? Thee Loki?"
My head was reeling, it felt like a joke. It had to be a joke. Why would we take Loki as an Agent?
"Shouldn't he be in Asgard?"
"Shouldn't the Ninja Turtles be in New York?" The Social Agent replied.
Fair enough. ((This is so funny to me for some reason))
The door on the other side of opened, revealing a young man. He had the classic fair skin, pale green eyes, and long black hair neatly slicked back. As he walked over I realized just how tall he was. In fact he probably had Donnie beat by a inch or two. Which meant he pretty much towered over me.
"Loki, this is ((NAME REDACTED)). She'll be your new supervisor, she's in charge of you and will handle your training. If you have any question or requests from now on she'll handle them."
"This little thing?" He said, scrunching his nose.
Irritation scratched at me, "This little thing happens to be in charge you, so I wouldn't let my size matter to much." I growled.
A subtle sly grin crawled across his thin lips. As if he was amused by my sass. "I am Loki of Asgard."
"((NAME REDACTED)) of the Agency." I joked.
"Now that introductions are out of the way. Could you please lead Loki to the training center, and began his first combat assessment."
I obeyed, taking the short walk, showing Loki to the training center. Then picked a large empty room to begin.
"I don't see the reason for this. I was raised by the monster Odin. Why is this necessary?" He complained.
I agreed with him. But, "Rules are Rules. Besides we need to see where you stand battle wise. Get a feel for your abilities."
"Can I just colber you into a pulp and call it a day?" He laughed.
Yeah, not happening. "I don't think you quite understand the Agency yet."
I pounced, sending blasts of pink neon his way. While he was preoccupied by barely avoiding my attacks I swept one of my legs to his feet. Falling back I shot another neon blast to him. It hit him in the chest flinging him into the wall with a thud. Yeah, I sneak attacks aren't fair, but somebody had to teach him.
Good thing he's not human because that probably would have killed him, or at the very least seriously injured him. But he just laid there, his head and back on the ground, and legs propped up against the wall. Trying to collect himself.
"First rule of the Agency, nothing is as it seems." I smiled leaning over him.
"PUNY MORTAL!" He yelled still upside down. ((UGLH this is annoying Avengers Loki. In my defense Thor Ragnarok was far from being released and I knew Loki from Norse Mythology was nothing like this.))
"Yeah, a puny mortal that just defeated you." I chuckled. Seeing him struggle a little to get straight up, I offered help but he denied it. I knew how much his pride hurt so I left him.
When he finally managed to get up and brush off I asked if he was ready for the next round. His reply was lunging for me at full speed.
I easily dodged his punches but he decided to pull the move I did to him earlier and caused my feet to come out from underneath me. I fell, but then rolled back up straight.
He got me though, and he knew it. I could tell by his sly grin. I smiled back.
"Alright we'll end in a tie. For now."
"Had enough?" He gloated.
"I'm sorry but who knocked who down first?" I struck back.
AN: I'm actually Norse Pagan now, and worship Loki, who is nothing like the movies. Taika Waititi came the closest with Disaster Bi Loki in Ragnarok
All Hallows Eve
Yes, like most, I am a huge fan of Halloween.
AN: AGAIN no clue where this was going.
Xzavier and I were standing outside the dormitory. Just talking, enjoying the cooling weather and gray skies. When suddenly, "Is that a cat?" Xzavier asked eyes focusing in the field in front of us.
I looked, seeing a small black moving figure. I seemed to be the right shape, and size for a cat. Why is there a cat here? We're surrounded by woods.
He started for it, I suddenly remembered his affection for felines and followed. As we got closer it was indeed a cat. Long and thin, with shiny, short, black fur, and pale green eyes.
Wait... Pale green eyes... Who do I know who has pale green eyes? And black hair?
I stopped Xzavier. "We know it's you Loki."
Xzavier looked at me like I'd grown a second head. That was until the cat grew and changed into Loki.
AN: MAKE IT STOP
AN: There was a prank war far before Loki showed up just fyi
Just one of those days
I'd like to think I'm a cheerful person most of the times. More outgoing, and confident. But of course, I have my days. And it really is one of those. The days I despise.
The kind where your insecurities strike you like a brick to the face. And all you want to do is wallow in self pity. I feel the weight of my flaws. I'm aware of my stupidity and worthlessness. These days for me come far and few inbetween. When they do I usually sit there depressed for an hour then try to cheer myself up. ((That's depression you dumb bitch))
It was around ten at night when I decided to take a walk around the Agency dorm buildings.
However I was at the wallowing stage. And yes I'm aware of how self absorbed it is. Which is why I despise it so much. Plus this one had no real trigger to happen so I feel even more ridiculous. ((The trigger was clinical depression))
I want to talk to Donnie about it, but he's in his lab. I'd be even more selfish by disrupting him to make him focus on me. That and it's not like I'd get much of an response, especially if he's lost in his work. ((It's never selfish to ask for serious help))
So yes I was lying when Loki asked what was so wrong with me.
"Nothing. Just tired."
"I'm the God of mischief and lies to your people. I hope your tiny mortal mind comprehends that."
"No you're a villain in a story to my people. I hope you realize that."
He did that stupid half grin I've come to hate so fully. "Either way you're a horrible liar. Your voice changes fluency and your eyes get paler when you're distressed. There is something wrong with you."
Damn he's good. But the next part was the truth. "It's not like it concerns you anyway. Besides I know you don't care."
There goes that stupid cocky smile again. "What can I say? I am not really concerned with you."
I started to walk away but was stopped by Loki putting his arm up. "However as told by that social agent if I have any questions or requests you are suppose to handle them. So I've came with a request for you to answer my question."
I swear how did he become so smooth? Did he take lessons or something?
"Fine." I said not really believing I'm about to share my feelings. "I feel horrible about myself right now. Alright? I just want to be alone."
Loki eyes widened slightly in surprise for a second. Looking at me, questionably. I turned away bracing myself for some sarcastic or insulting response. I mean, it's Loki after all. He'll just feed on my insecurities and make me feel worse. But it never came.
Instead this did, "Well now as a superior being I command thee to stop."
I looked at him. "What?"
"Stop moping around. It's very unbecoming for you. Be happier."
Does he seriously think by him bossing me around I'll feel better? I can't help but shake my head at him.
And maybe, just barely, just slightly, grin.
"Ah ha! Is that a smile?" He gloated.
And of course at this I can't help but grin even wider. I SWEAR, HOW DID HE BECOME SO SMOOTH? I NEED TO KNOW WHERE HE'S TAKING LESSONS.
Then of course he does his stupid contagious laugh. Which sends me into a frenzy of giggling too. SERIOUSLY, WHAT IS IT?
"I hate you." I gasped between laughs.
But I couldn't denine how much better I feel. Just laughing. And after we managed to stop the cycle of laughter, he gave me look of accomplishment and slinked off. That mischievous twinkle in his pale green eyes.
He somehow made me smile when I was feeling my worst. And I can't but think about all those stories about him. How he's so evil. But he's not. If anything he needs redirection, friendship, and I'm not ashamed or unconvinced to be his friend and monitor. In fact I think I'll be just fine.
AN: Yes hun, you turn out fine and happier. If any of you guys feel like this a lot please talk to someone about it. My DMs are always open.
Ruins in Russia
Loki's first mission. And even though he won't admit it I know he's excited. I can't tell if he's lying, because let's face it, he's the king of lying. But I can tell by that excited twinkle in his pale eyes, and that extra bound in his step.
It's an information gathering mission. We just need to check some ruins in the Russian wilderness. You know to make sure there's no ancient wrath that'll destroy the Earth and what not.
Nothing really out of the ordinary.
We're honestly more of escorting a social agent to check the ruins. The Agency has probably known about ruins for centuries, but now there's supposedly a team of normal people who found out about and plan to go to check it out in the Spring.
So obviously we're going to check it out in the Winter.
Which means packing for a Russian Winter. But we're not invading, so I'm too concerned.
However I despise the cold. So put on two pairs of pants, three shirts (plus the generic Agency jacket), three pairs of socks, and thick Winter boots. Loki however is wearing his usual attire.
Sometimes I am jealous he's a frost giant.
We meet at the Agency administration office, and course Loki just had to comment.
"What's all that? You cold, little girl?"
"Piss off." I grumbled.
"You're extra feisty today. Don't like the little white beast that swallowed your torso?" He laughed .
"Loki, one more comment like that and I'll show you what this little white beast can do." I shot back.
He did that stupid sly half grin he does whenever he's amused by me. I smiled back, I guess this is now a normal thing. We say hello with insults.
"Ah, there you are." A plain social agent said walking up to us. "Once Travis, the agent who will be joining you, gets here I'll send you all on your way."
Which didn't take very long. A guy, in his early twenties, with a dirty blonde hair, big circular glasses, and a thin frame, bounded up to us. He reminded me of Milo from Atlantis. Only wearing a thick jacket.
AN: All I remember is it was an Adventure that ends in a daring escape through collapsing tunnels.
You gotta love them. How can you not? Who doesn't love to throw them down and hear that pop along with the tiny spark? Someone I don't want to be friends with.
And not only do I love to toss them onto the ground and claim to be a wizard, I love to pull pranks with them too.
I put them in them handle of toilets, in cabinets, under pillows, and etc. So when you flush the toilet, pop. Open or close the cabinet, pop. Lay your head down, pop. And whenever I feel like it, pop.
Yeah, I know, it's evil. That's why I love it.
And I've decided to target one person in particular.
He has yet to prank me, though with him being a frontrunner in the Prank War, it's just a matter of time.
And the prank isn't too mean, so nothing over the top should come in return. I just want little fun.
Perfect timing too, because Loki is actually going on his first mission without me.
I snuck into his dorm, to my surprise there was barely anything in there. Just a generic gray agency bed. No desk or anything.
AN: Unfinished again and forgotten like before.
By the way trigger warning for heavier stuff upcoming and mention of brain and body trauma.
That's all I remember thinking. It was what kept repeating in my mind. The only thing I heard.
You won't die.
You can't die.
Even as he was being lifted into the helicopter, even as I held his hand. Even running down the hall of the Agency medical wing to keep up with the stretcher.
I Only snapped out of it when I was denied access into the same room as him. It was like the ringing in my ears finally stopped. Like I was underwater for long time and I just now resurfaced.
"You can't go in." A nurse informed me.
"Medical personnel only until he's stabilized."
"You can't you this! I'm-"
"Yes, I know your relation to him. So if you want to keep that going you need to let the doctors do what they to."
"Thank you. Please keep us posted on his condition." Someone interrupted me.
Loki. He grabbed me by the arm, forcefully pulling me away from the door. I tried to twist and turn out of his grasp. My arm stung and he was much stronger than me.
I hate being so weak. I hate not being able to do anything. I hate that I could have stopped him from hitting the ground.
I squirmed even more for freedom. "LET. ME-"
"Shut your trap!" He yelled at me. "Even if you were able to do get into Donnie's room what help would you be?"
I looked at him, long strands of his raven black hair falling out of place. His pale green eyes staring harshly at me. His long, cold, skinny fingers still wrapped tightly around my wrists, held level with my face.
My eyes burned from hot tears swelling around them. He was right. I almost collapsed from the sudden release. All of my muscles had been wound so tight from anticipation of a fight. My legs turned to rubber. Loki caught me.
"W-what am I going to do?" I stuttered.
"Wait. That's all you can do." He nearly whispered.
"Donnie!" A familiar voice called.
"Leo…" I called back.
He ran me. I fell into his arms, legs still not working properly. More tears escaped my eyes.
"What happened?" Leo asked.
"We were scoping out an abandoned warehouse. There was reports of strange activity. And…" I paused. "He fell through the floor. I grabbed onto him we both fell."
"You fell too? Wait let's get you-"
"I'm fine. I didn't hit the ground near as hard as he did."
"You should still-"
"I'm fine." I choked. "I just hope Donnie is too."
He hugged me. "So do I." I nuzzled my face into his shoulder. Barely keeping back tears.
We sat down across the hall from his room. Soon nearly everyone was there. All of the brothers, Xzavier, Daniel, Kendrick. And so would Austin if it weren't for the fact he was on a mission. That and he wasn't answering my texts, as usual. Loki, however, slinked off in the meanwhile. Him and Donnie hated each other. Why should he stay around? You know besides supporting me. The only person in this place to show him kindness. To reach out in friendship, in conversation.
Don't get me wrong Austin tried to talk to him too. Though most of the time that ends in destruction.
I curled myself into a tight ball so me and Leo could share the same chair. We waited, hours on end. I was already exhausted from the mission and the emotional turmoil of the day. I must have fallen asleep, knees up to my chest, because next thing I knew I was being carried.
Only half awake, my foggy mind recognized Kendrick. Broad shoulders, silver hair. Not to mention how warm he was. I was almost completely lulled back to sleep by the comforting heat.
He stopped, careful not to drop me.
"I can take her the rest of the way to her dorm." Another voice called.
"I don't trust you enough to leave her with you alone." Kendrick rebutlied.
"Actually not an unwise decision." said the voice, getting closer.
"Donnie, definitely, wouldn't trust you."
"You could, at the very least, use some help opening doors and getting her to bed."
Kendrick continued walking, footsteps of another followed, forming some kind of silent agreement with the stranger.
My mind, disoriented with drowsiness, could barely register the fact I was being put into bed. Or the fact someone was taking off my heavy combat boots.
I drifted into a dreamless slumber.
AN: was another story after this one but I deleted it cuz I truly hated it. It wasn't interesting. Never explained what happened to Donnie afterwards or anything. I know he lived but the last time I talked about was in 2016.
Austin and I aren't that close anymore but still keep in touch.
I've since came out and been very accepted by a very not surprised Austin. I've always been fairly masculine and into more feminine individuals almost all my life. I also haven't had a panic attack since I was 17. And have my depression in check with a good support system, meds, and workout regimen.
It gets better. I know it sounds like bullshit but high school and middle school have an end. And it gets better.
I love you all.