AN: A quick head's up for this. My wife and I always saw Madara and Hashirama different than I see in a lot of portrayals on this site. We saw Madara as a more tragic figure. He wanted peace with Hashirama, but his family was killed, Tobirama was an utter bastard (we see him as more of a villain honestly) and he was treated like an outcast even in the village he helped create. Combine that with the curse of Hatred I just felt sorry for him and we saw his true self as energetic, snarky, and sarcastic along with his ambition. In essence, what a Slytherin SHOULD be. Hashirama we just see as a massive and utter dork, excitable, playful, and very trusting with his friends…a lot like Naruto himself honestly. But with that in mind this story will have that Hashirama and he will be trying to fix Madara (with help from Naruto and his 'therapy jutsu')
AN2: I have no idea what pairing to use for this. I want him to be paired with a Shinobi, but I don't want to use anyone from Konoha. I'm willing to listen to any suggestion seriously unless its slash. Also, no multi or CRA.
A Shinigami's Substitution
Scowling, the Shinigami stared down at the blond mortal who had summoned him to consume half of the soul of the Kyuubi and seal the other half into a newborn child. It was always the same, some mortal got in a fight over their head and used that damned Jutsu to summon him so they could take the person they were losing to with them.
Turning to look at the Kyuubi, the Shinigami frowned, not wanting to eat a piece of the Juubi. Even he knew there would be consequences to doing so and this whole mess of the Biju rampaging was the human's fault to begin with.
As he gathered his energy a thought began to occur to him. It would likely piss off the other gods but fuck it, he was sick of this shit anyway. Clapping his hands together, there was a brilliant flash of light as the three mortals and the Kyuubi found themselves in an endless white void. "M-Minato," the redhaired woman groaned out, clutching her injuries which were still open but no longer bleeding "where are we? What did you do?"
"I don't know?!" the man was panicking and looking around before pointing at the Shinigami, "Why have you brought us here? I summoned you to seal half the Kyuubi's soul into my son!"
"I'm aware." The Shinigami scowled at the injured mortal while Kyuubi, still in chains, snickered at the man's anger, the Biju having left their rage and rampage the instant he brought them to the void and away from the Sharingan's influence. "But I am sick of being used because you mortals keep fighting opponents stronger than yourself. So, I've decided to 'change the rules'. The Kyuubi won't be sealed within your son, something else will. The kyuubi's current form will die and it will reform somewhere else with the rest of the Elemental Nations thinking it sealed within this kid. Since I didn't use your terms I won't eat your soul."
"But my son needs the power of the Kyuubi to stop the one who attacked my village!" the blonde Hokage protested.
"I'll make sure he the souls I seal in him are able to help. And mortal, I would suggest you watch yourself as you don't get to order me. Especially as you planned to defy the contract and seal part of your soul within the boy as well." The mortal paled at realizing that he knew about the planned deception. "Once I send you back you'll die." The Shinigami informed them with a shrug, unphased at the nature of the discussion "Kyuubi, I'll go ahead and let you reform in the mountains somewhere. Just try to stay out of trouble." A wave of his hand and the orange kitsune dissolved, vanishing into the ether, it's chakra returning to the elemental nations to reform within a few years.
A second wave of his hand sent the two mortals back to earth, time still being stopped in his little void. "Now who to use, who to use." The Shinigami muttered as he considered his options before a new idea struck him, "Oh, that will be entertaining." Reaching into the land of the dead, he pulled out two souls as they manifested in the void, glowing binds on their wrists. "Hashirama Senju, Madara Uchiha." he greeted the souls as they manifested.
"Shinigami Sama." Hashirama bowed his head respectfully while Madara just looked nervous, "May I ask why we are here?"
"Simple, I was summoned with the Reaper Death Seal due in part to a scheme made by this fool." The Shinigami gestured to Madara who looked affronted at the description, "But I'm tired of being treated as the garbage bin for the enemies of those who summon me, so I've changed the rules. The Kyuubi is now dead and reforming but your little cult aren't going to know about that Madara." The Shinigami smirked down at the powerful Uchiha, "No, they'll still think this child is the Kyuubi and this child is where the two of you will be sealed."
"I fail to see the issue." Madara scoffed, "I will simply ensure the child dies so I return to the afterlife and can be resurrected, trick him into passing a message on to the Akatsuki that the Kyuubi is reforming. You've delayed my plans, not thwarted them."
"Yes, about that." The Shinigami smirked as he got right in the face of the mortal soul, "If this child dies at the hands of anything related to your scheme, then your soul won't go to the afterlife, I'll eat it so you can never be revived."
"What?!" Madara gaped in outrage. Hashirama was just rolling on the ground laughing his ass off.
"You heard me Mortal." Shinigami laughed, amused at his own little game, "That means you two will have to do what you can to keep the boy alive and make him strong. You will be only able to watch until the boy is six years old and enters the academy, then you may begin speaking with him."
"What's his name?" Hashirama's soul asked, playing with the infant who gurgled eagerly.
"Naruto Uzumaki. His mother was Kushina Uzumaki, your wife's successor as Jinchuriki and her Niece." The Shinigami explained as Hashirama gaped before scooping the blond infant, babbling happy nonsense to the child he now knew was family.
"Hashirama, you're making a fool of yourself…again." Madara deadpanned.
"And you're being grumpy as always." Hashirama sniffed before going back to using a baby voice, "Isn't that right little Naruto?"
"The boy will have your elemental natures," the Shinigami interrupted before an argument could truly break out, "and the Sharingan. It is up to the both of you to help him control these gifts and to advise him. Also, just to avoid you doing anything stupid Madara, he cannot attain the eternal mangekyo. Instead, since he has you sealed inside him, his regular mangekyo won't degrade his eyes but also won't have the increased power the eternal version would have."
"It will be nice to see Konoha again." Hashirama smiled happily at the thought, "Thank you Shinigami-Sama." After a pause, the man turned to Madara, "Say thank you to the Shinigami Madara! I know you actually have some manners locked away in that thick skull of yours!"
"…Thank you Shinigami-San." Madara groused only to be slapped hard in the back of the head by Hashirama.
"Say it properly." The first Hokage chided only for Madara to punch the Senju in the face as the two began fighting. Sighing, and catching the dropped infant, the Shinigami snapped his fingers to seal both souls into the baby and then. A second flash of light put the infant back into the mortal world as he watched the two parents bleed out and an old man, the Third Hokage, find the infant. The Shinigami knew that word would spread that the boy was Jinchuriki of the Kyuubi.
"This should prove to be most entertaining." The Shinigami chuckled as he relaxed on his throne to watch the Mortal world and the game he and now set afoot.