Thanos was splayed upon his throne on his ship, panting like a great purple flaccid dong that wanted to stiffen but just couldn't. His whole being was in trauma over the Vegan cult and their sudden... what? Thanos didn't know what to call the sudden shit-spew-flesh crave-spasm that they had all just exhibited. He had no idea what had just happened or who the sudden leather-clad bat-wielding society was. All he knew was that the cult wanted to upturn the balance of life and death by not only stopping humans preying upon flesh as was nature but also killing those who refused to stop consuming it. Thanos hated it when life was out of balance and they were now causing him to panic about it. Especially as somehow he had had a gauntlet in them turning into cannibals. He waited for Riddle to appear but suddenly remembered seeing his figure on the monitor hanging upside down from his cloak and being dragged along by the ship. No doubt he had burned up in the atmosphere and was dead. This made Thanos sad as Riddle always had such a calming influence on him when his panic about balance got out of hand.
He saw the head woman of the leather brigade poke her head around the doorframe.
"We're clear. Good job you have a spaceship." She exclaimed and walked over to him. "Thank you for helping to fight them. Are you alright?" She looked at the titan who was now breathing into a paper potato sack to try and calm down.
"I... can't...cope...with... such... balance... interference." He gasped through breathes as the sack puffed up and down like a scrotum on a bicycle pump. "I ...don't...understand...why...they...want...to...upset...nature..." Brenda put a tiny hand in a leather fingerless glove on top of his giant knee
"Nobody understands them. Why do you think I fight their hypocrisy? Look, you need a distraction. How do you like to relax?" Thanos was calming down now and he threw the sack aside.
"I like to read. Maybe I'll calm down in the library."
"Great!" Said Brenda as Thanos got up and towered above her. From where she stood looking up, it looked like a giant purple ball sack in a helmet was above her. The ridges in his jaw were so... distinctive. She said nothing as he strode away. She ignored the epic shit stain that had appeared in the back of his armoured gym kit. Poor guy, he had it hard having such responsibility. She followed him down a series of metal corridors until he came to the library. Here he put on a pair of glasses and climbed up a ladder. A large brownish black book with a Cthulu creature on the front had been up on top and he carried down the ladder as if it were as light as a porn magazine. He sat in his favourite armchair and opened the cover with his right hand (the gauntlet was too clumsy to deal with the delicate ancient pages)
"I found this lying around an old temple when I was searching for these" he explained and flicked the Gems of Infinity up to show her. Brenda didn't fully understand what they were but she'd ask when he felt better and had changed his pants. Thanos flicked through the book and yelled as tentacles shot out of it and started wrapping around his limbs.
"Arrrrrgghhhhhh!" He yelled as Brenda leaped forwards and tried to pull the book from his hands. The Gauntlet of Infinity lit up and threw her backwards to safety- Thanos didn't want this rational woman hurt. He wrestled the tentacles which were trying to pull him further into the book as if unbirthing him back into the womb of Cthulu. More tentacles squeezed out of the pages as an eerie green light shone in his face making his skin look the color of a fresh turd. He tried to gem the things, but they suddenly felt the power of the gauntlet and made a beeline for it. They wrapped around each finger and the wrist like evil hentai Chinese finger bondage and started pulling with all their might. Thanos roared at the thought of losing his baby and clenched his other fist around the metal glove and held on. The tentacles snaked around every part of him including his fear boner until they felt he was as secure as a Japanese shibari masochist who preferred wire instead of rope. Then they started to pull him into the book.
"Argh! Argh! Argh!" Thanos spasmed as the things failed to pull him into the book (Thanos was far too big and the tentacles didn't seem to be able to do their magical warping). He let out muffled roars as they repeatedly pulled him against the pages and his head hit the book hard so his cries of pain punctuated each bash. Thanos was now stretching himself out as far as possible and did a Mission Impossible pose across the book… but the tentacles were taking over and pulling his beefy purple arms above his head and his legs behind him so they could created a body tube like a tentacular body sized condom over his limbs. By the time they had finished he looked like a novelty purple headed anal toy with the Gauntlet hand high above his head as his free hand clutched onto it like a cock ring fit for an elephant. Fists first the appendages pulled the titan into the Black Book while he yelled to Brenda not to follow him. She cried after him as his giant boots disappeared into the book and it shut itself so that the green light died down.
Thanos felt himself fall a few inches to the floor with a bump. Everything was quiet….silent…. still…. The tentacles somehow had gone in the time it took him to pass through the pages of the tome and land in wherever the hell this was. It was green and full of garbage everywhere, looking like someone had used a library of books as toilet paper and lashed them to the floor like used rubbers full of brown cum. He gemmed a paper sack into existence and started having a panic attack into it before he started walking through the weird shit book repository.
All along the weird corridors tentacles kept snaking out of pools of what looked like diarrhea from a vegan who only eats kale and olive oil smoothies. They freaked him out, especially when they suddenly whipped him across the tushie and brought back painful childhood memories of his mother's tough love (because he had so many brothers and sisters and his family was poor his mother beat into them the harshness of the world by only giving what little food they had to the five siblings who were the last ones who had not pooped themselves from the pain of her whipping them repeatedly. This meant that the strongest would survive and grow and the weaker ones would learn about natural selection. So it was that Thanos gained his complex about population over-crowding and needing to restore the balance of life against resources so that the crap was not beaten out of innocent children. He had tried to remind Gammorrah about his brutal childhood every time she complained that Thano's training regime for her was too much to expect of an eight year old girl who wasn't a brawny Titan: she might be aching and suffering from sprained muscles and feel like a car had hit her but at least it was in pursuit of a stronger body rather than an old woman whipping her in the chance she might get a crust of bread and lacerating her backside and dirtying her pants in the process.)
Thanos rubbed his ass at the memory and felt the thick scar tissue beneath which stood out like veins on a highly pumped dong. It was when he felt a breeze around hit butthole that he realised he had somehow absentmindedly ed the hand with the gauntlet on it and for some reason a small portal like an anus to nowhere had formed in his pants. Tht was odd, he thought. It normally took massive bran power to get it to do anything and a lot of concentration which he had not just been doing (that was why he could never use the thing while on the John, because he was too busy and distracted with trying to jettison his log-like turds from his anal tract.) with great difficulty he managed to close the portal and started to worry about the safer of the Gauntlet. What if it was damaged and highly receptive to stray thoughts? What if those tentacle things tried to get it off again? If the power of the gems was compromised, he would not be able to defend it if it came to combat! He took the executive decision to hide it for safe keeping. He bent over, spat a cum-load of saliva onto the articulated fingers and began forcing it up his rectum, where he decided he'd deal with rebirthing it when he got out of this place and back to the safety of his ship. (He wasn't looking forward to that as the flared base of the gauntlet meant that pushing it out would be like trying to force an elephant through a cockring without it snapping or garrotting he mammal. He grunted and groaned with the effort of opening his anual sphincter which a
Had been well toned during his childhood tests of maternal survival. When it was finally in, he lay there exhausted and took a few moments to meditate and steel himself for whatever he would have to bash with his fists.
He continued on trying to ignore the index finger that kept lightly poking his prostate. A few weird things from under the sea appeared and he headbutted them until they disappeared. He wasn't quite quick enough with one and it duplicated so that when he had finally punched it into submission, another appeared and then another until he finally found the culprit and ripped the tentacles from the rotting spaghetti ball and all its doppelgangers vanished with it leaving piles of white dust behind. Thanos needed a pepup and something to bolster his strength seeing as he felt like he had fucked ten rounds with Mike Tyson and had only just survived. He knelt down wondering if these powerful creatures had equally medicinal value like Chinese medicine. He inhaled some of the dust. Immediately he fell backwards shaking as the knowledge of everything ever recorded about tentacles flew through his mind. He lay there stoned while his body twitched and he gasped for air. As he calmed down, he started to feel sick as his vision went into 4D (two eyes allows you to see in 3 dimensions - vertically, horizontally and out(depth). Now he could also see the fourth dimension of space which meant seeing other being in parallel worlds who were in the same places in their respective universes. ) He grimaced and got up rubbing his aching head. He yelled as the sensation of being poked in the eye hit him. While he kept them closed he felt his forehead as gently as a dominatrix conducted tickle torture with a feather om her gimp. He had a third eye! A third eye on the left side of his head. All that daedric knowledge had made him increase his 'sight' for he now saw more. But Thanos started to grow restless and agitated the more he ran his left digits over the eyelid and right ones over his smooth sode of forehead. He couldn't rest. He couldn't. It ruined everything! His yoga, his reputation, his life's work. EVERYTHING!
"WAAAAAA!" The bald purple giant bawled, punctuating every sentence by thumping his fists on the ground. "WHY?" He thumped the floor as snot dripped from his nose like precum. "WHY IS EVERYTHING ALWAYS OUT OF BALANCE? WHY CAN'T EVERYTHING BE EQUAL? WHY CAN'T IT BE IN THE MIDDLE OF MY HEAD? OR AN EXTRA EYE? THEN EVERYTHING WOULD BE FINE!" He cried and cried rolling around the floor until he accidentally rolled into a weird ornament that turned into a vase and the floor began to rumble. The sudden movement of the corridor he was lying in shut him up like a buttplug up a diarrhearic anus. He snapped out of his tantrum and tried to stand up as the corridor stopped moving. His third eye and the 4D vision made him fall over due to seeing three lots of worlds overlapping at once, so he ripped the leg off his pants and tied it like Rambo over the surplus eye, which took away the blurred overlapping vision of a school, golf course, the shit-filled library and underground Berlin sex club. He pulled himself to his feet wiping his streaming nose on his manacle and tried to walk normally along the connecting corridor. (His tantrum had dislodged the gauntlet and it was chaffing his colon.
The corridor opened onto a platform with a huge kale smoothie slick in the middle and a cloud of writhing tentacles and eyeballs hovering over it.
"I…wondered…when…you…would…find…me…Than…os. " said the thing, though he didn't seem to have a mouth. "I…am … the … Daedric …god … of …knowledge …and …I …know …you …have …something …that …I …need …give …it …to …me …and …i …will …gift …you …something …in …return." Tentacles shot out of the kale pool straight at Thanos and pulled him into the air.
"NOOOOOOOOOO!" Thanos roared and started flailing about in attempt to snap the snakey appendages.
"Hmmmm…where…is…it…" hummed Chthulu's brother. He shook Thanos hoping to dislodge the gauntlet. He hummed again and slid tentacles into every orifice. The Titan's muffled cries sounded pathetic as the appendages wriggled into him. "I…feel…it…. You…tried…to…hide…it…from…me…" they wound themselves into the glove one tentacle in each finger. Thanos felt his prostate swell as one of the gems sparked. "Why…won't…it…work…?" the fingers of the gauntlet flexed and the purple giant grunted and groaned as his dong started to rise through the hole in his pants. "I…Am…A…God…why…can't…I…work…it…?" It seemed that the magic of the Daedra was not compatible with the Gems of Infinity and he was having problems activating them. The glove twisted and gripped his prostate until suddenly light shone from his ass and Hermaeus Mora sighed climactically. "I…see…it…all… ALL! All…the…knowledge…of…your…world…EVERYTHING!" the eyes of the monster bulged and the light grew. And then…Hermeaus Mora screamed as eyes began popping into existence all over him. (He already had many because knowing so much meant he 'saw' everything and thus eyes grew accordingly to allow him to see further) "So …much…knowledge…I…see…it…all…but… not… this… much… no… I…can't… too… much…I…can't…understand…those… things… no… ship… can… sail… in…the…sky… no… only…magic…can… move…a … horseless… carriage…i…don'tunderstand…Stop…STOP!" Thanos watched as the eyes grew so much that the god now looked like a giant bubble monster. The tentacles started to retract as eyes popped into existence all over them and Thanos crashed to the ground orgasming and spraying dong juice all over the eye monster. There was a scream as it stung every inch of the gods new eyes. The last tentacle pulled out of his anus. The Titan yelled as the gauntlet was ripped out of his backside by the tentacle and went catapulting through the air into the distance of the massive kale smoothie ocean that surrounded everything in this world, a trail of diarreah following it like a turd comet (the fear and anxiety caused him to keep producing shit and the gauntlet had acted like a cork keeping it in.). There came a very muffled voice from the mound of eyes as Thanos landed on his backside and roared in pain as blood oozed into a pile of disused books.
The eyes towered up to the cloud that was normally Hermaeus Mora and each tendril was covered with them too. His mouth was covered somewhere by the ocular organs and he could barely let out a word. The purple gym instructor crawled past the mutated god while turd, blood and cum dripped from him, having seen something on a plinth up ahead and wanting to get away from this creep as soon as possible. At the stone block he pulled himself up and came face to face with another black book that seemed to have a drawing of his spaceship library on it. He picked it up to read closer as the tears fell down his face. No sooner had he looked at it then he was pulled into it by tentacles. He screamed and flailed into oblivion.
"Please sir, please! It's alright, you're safe!" Thanos opened his eyes to find himself on his back with Brenda stroking his head and trying to mop up his backside with a rug. She tried to ignore what she assumed was one hell of a fear boner sticking up like a dance pole for leprechauns. Thanos bawled like a baby and curled up in the foetal position. "Don't worry, you'll be alright…. I NEED BANDAGES SOMEONE!" she yelled out of the door. Thanos managed to gasp through his cries.
"I… lost it! I lost it! He took it from me!" Brenda looked from his dong to his dripping backside.
"Oh god someone stole your anal virginity!" she gasped.
"NO! The gauntlet…. It's gone! He stole it and lost it! AND I HAVE A THIRD EYE THAT ISN'T SIMMETRICAL ON MY HEAD!" He ripped the rag away so Brenda could see. She took in everything and her eyes bulged at the insanity of it all. The vegans could wait- this guy had serious problems.