The hardest goodbyes – Chapter 3

"Dear Mom and Dad…

How do I begin, where do I begin?"

William paused for a second before furiously scribbling a message to his parents.

"Please forgive me for writing this letter as one and not separate to each of you, it's becoming harder to concentrate and focus and perhaps a slight ulterior motive so you both have to be in the same room to read it. Be nice to think of my parents together one last time. I don't expect miracles and you two to be back together, goodness have I seen that scenario play out multiple times."

William chuckled to himself thinking back to all the times he tried to get his parents back together or in the same room without killing one another, surely in his death they had to achieve this.

Will's chuckle became a cough and with the cough came pain in his chest and his head and thus led to him dropping the journal and pen to the floor and he began to seize once more, the lights becoming black to him and losing all sense of where he was and what was happening, the last thought he had was this was it.

Again the alarms sounding on his monitors and the nurses raced to his room, the ping of the elevator came as Sonny came through with his morning coffee and routine with Will for the day, his eyes watching in slow motion the nurses and the alarm sounds, the coffee slips from his hand as quickly as the colour from his face, he is transfixed in where he stands.

A moment later he is racing to the room and sees the paddles and the nurses furiously working on Will, how much worse could this get Sonny thought, and eventually he hears a gasp and eyes fluttering open and Will is back again, but for how long?

Sonny shuffles into the room and sees the journal and pen on the floor, he picks them up and places them on the side, his hand carefully interlaces with Wills and he feels a squeeze and there are those blue eyes staring at him, like a scared child needing reassurance.

Sonny perches on the edge of the bed and with his other hand strokes Will's forehead and caresses his cheek "I'm here darling, I'm here, you're okay."

"But for how long?" Will whispers and Sonny leans and kisses him gently.

The nurses disperse after explaining to Sonny that a doctor would be by soon to discuss further options.

"What options are there, I am dying?"

"Will I am so sorry we still haven't found the journal or the formula to try and make an antidote"

"Will you hold me?"

Sonny cautiously slips his shoes off and takes his position next to Will on the bed carefully slipping his arm around the back of Will who curled into him, Will feeling calm and safe as he is in his husbands arms… ohhh boyfriend's arms he thought.


They both dozed for a while, Sonny woke first realising that his arm had gone numb and very limp, he tried to move it without success. He nudged Will who remained asleep, Sonny nudged him once more with a bit more force and there was still no response. Sonny couldn't see if Will was breathing or not, his chest wasn't rising.

OH GOD! Sonny thought, he placed two fingers against Will's jugular vein and felt a soft rhythmic pulsing and he let out the breath that he was holding inside. Instead he uses the hand to cup Wills head and raise it to release his arm and to relieve the now pins and needles he feels coursing his arm as the blood returns.

He lays Wills head back down and creeps off the bed. As he stands there is a faint whisper behind him

"Where are you going?

Sonny turns and sees Will staring at him

"My arm went dead … errr numb so I needed to wake it up but you weren't waking up… I thought…"

"You thought I was dead… I could hear you but my eyes didn't want to open" Will coughed

"Water?" Sonny asked

"Yes please." Will thought for a moment and spoke "Can I ask a favour?"

"Anything" Sonny responded.

"I was writing a letter to my parents in case I … errr for when I don't make it… it was what I was doing before I crashed. Could you help me finish it?"

Sonny came closer with the cup and straw with water and allowed Will to take several gulps before placing that on the side and picking the journal and pen and opening it to the last page catching glimpses of several previous pages the first being Arianna.

He fiercely tried to hold back the tears and took his position in the chair next to the bed and read aloud the last sentence of Will's letter

"Be nice to think of my parents together one last time. I don't expect miracles and you two to be back together, goodness have I seen that scenario play out multiple times."

Will smiles "I put a snake in their tent this one-time" Sonny's eyebrow raised and saw a glint of mischievousness echo throw Will's eyes as he relieved the memory

"So I know where Ari gets it from" Sonny chuckled

"Don't forget who her mother is, she has her fair share of mischievous deeds as well"

"There is no hope for Ari"

"She has you"

"She has us Will"

Will silently nodded before saying "so say in the note, that time I put the snake in the tent…"

They spent some time with Will dictating and Sonny scribing the letter for him, going over each paragraph to make sure it was how he wanted it.

"I will love you forever, thank you for keeping the tigers away this long… Will"

Tears roll down his face as he can't hold them back any more. Sonny closes the journal and comforts Will "I know, shhhhhh, I love you, they will be here soon."

"There is another letter I need you to help me with."

"Sure, but I think you need a break for a little bit, close your eyes, I will wake you, I promise" Sonny said hiding his own tears.

"Start it with dear grandma okay…"

To be continued