Charles glared over at Hawkeye, "I hope you don't turn into Corporal O'Riley," he said with a disapproving tone, "our unit does not need the benefit of having a petting zoo again."
"Oh come on Charles, just 'til he's better," Hawkeye replied.
"Pierce, your heart is in the right place, but let me tell you if that bird gets in my space, he won't be staying at our place," Charles added.
Hawkeye sighed and picked the bird up in his hands, "Don't mind him, he gets cranky when anyone so much as breathes near him," Hawkeye said, looking over to Charles.
Charles stood up from his chair and walked over to Hawkeye's cot. He looked down at the bird with both worry and disgust written on his face. "Where did you find the disease-ridden thing anyway?"
"He is not disease-ridden! ...I don't think... Anyway, I found him hobbling around in the grass, he couldn't have been more than a few feet away from the mine field. So I picked him up, he didn't try and run away or nothin!"
"Hmm, I see," Charles said, kneeling down to get a closer look at the bird. It's wing was definitely messed up, as Hawkeye had said when he first brought the bird in, and there was discharge around the eyes.
"I'm no veterinarian, Pierce, but you're right, it definitely has a broken wing, but I also noticed it's eyes seem-"
"It it it. We can't keep calling it... an it."
"I think I'll call him..."
"Pierce, no! You can't name it! If you name it you'll get attached to it, and you get attached to it you'll want to keep it, and if you keep it, well it's Radar's petting zoo all over again! And let me tell you, Pierce, if you do so much as-"
"No! Not you. I'm calling him Charles!"
Charles sighed, "Where on Earth do you intend on keeping the thing! I mean you can't just let that bird prance about our tent!"
"No- no! I absolutely refuse to refer to that bird as... well, me!"
"Fine, I'll go and find a box or something to put him in," Hawkeye said, handing the bird off to Charles. "You hold onto him until I get back, m'kay?"
Charles looked down at the bird Hawkeye placed in his hands, "Pierce, do not leave me with this... disgusting little- Pierce?"
But when Charles looked back up, Hawkeye was already halfway out the door, and Charles was stuck with... well, Charles.