279A Year in the Life of HOA President, Bella Swan
September
Around Labor Day
FORKS VALLEY HOA FB GROUP:
EMc2-"Neighborhood Swingers Party, September 10th at Rose and my house, 1106 Poe. *whoop, whoop, cohabitation with my girl! * Show up around 7 and be ready to mingle!
MNewton-"Is this for real?"
EMc2-"You know it! See you there?"
MNewton-"Um, maybe?"
JessStanley-"I'll show mine if you show yours. 😉"
MNewton-"I'm coming!"
JessStanley-"Hopefully, me too. LOL"
RosalieHale-" SINGLES party NOT SWINGERS party!
CoolGmaCope- "Nuts!"
"Honestly, it was only a matter of time." Rose commented, patting Bella on the back. "Jane has wanted to rule the neighborhood since her and that creepy husband of hers moved in three years ago."
"Oh, he's so creepy! He just stands behind her with that weird expression on his blank face." Alice interjected, placing a plate of cut fruit on the buffet table.
"Right? And they don't act like a real couple."
"I know! No PDA, no endearments-I bet it's like kissing his sister." Rose and Alice both grimaced at the thought.
"Guys, can we focus on the fact that Jane Jackson has decided to run a smear campaign against me for the HOA Presidency."
"Overreact much?" Alice giggled at the angry face Bella made at Rose's sarcastic comment.
"Whoa, what's with the lemon face?" Bella glared at Emmett.
"This is your fault?" She accused, stabbing a finger into his muscular chest.
Ever since Emmett had started the neighborhood Facebook group, Bella had been putting out fires he'd been unintentionally starting. And Jane Jackson had honed in on each misunderstanding, making sure to post comments that only reignited whatever fire Bella had just managed to put out.
This week it had been a misunderstanding about the party they were currently setting up. Emmett had blamed autocorrect for the error, but it didn't matter how 'Singles' got replaced by 'Swingers', the mistake had set off a firestorm within their community and Jane Jackson was pouring gas on the flames.
"I said I was sorry." Bella hardened her heart as he flashed his dimples at her.
Bella swallowed her retort as the doorbell rang. Emmett squealed in excitement as he ran off to greet his first guests.
"So, Swan, looks like you'll have a little competition this year. You up for it?" Bella kept her public smile in place as Jim Banner sloshed his bourbon and seven onto Rose's immaculate deck.
"Of course. Anyone in the community is welcomed to run." Jim scoffed at her statement, clearly not believing she was okay with having competition for the position.
As the party continued, Bella walked around making small talk with her neighbors. Even though the party had been originally meant to be a singles party, because of the misunderstanding, they'd decided to rebrand the whole thing as just a community mixer. However, that didn't stop a few of the residents from still attempting to 'swing'.
"Mrs. Cope, please stop trying to give me your keys!" Jasper pleaded, rushing past the elderly woman that was intent on being his partner for the night.
"Call me Shelley, Blondie." Jasper cringed as she jingled her keys in front of his face with a lewd wink.
"Where's Dr. Green-eyes tonight?" Tanya Denali inquired over the rim of her third mango margarita. Bella usually loved talking about her handsome boyfriend, but she'd rapidly become tired of having to mark her territory to all of the single neighborhood women.
"He's working, but he should be here later."
"Sweeeet." Tanya slurred. Bella watched as she walked away to go stand with the equally inebriated, Lauren Mallory.
Bella had just dodged another offer for dinner from Felix Brannon, the attractive architect that recently moved into 1812 Cussler Court, when her newest nemesis appeared in front of her.
"Hello, Bella." Every time Jane said her name, it reminded Bella of the way Jerry Seinfeld used to greet his cantankerous and troublesome neighbor, Newman.
"Jane, are you enjoying yourself?" Bella forced herself to be polite.
"Not as much as Shelley Cope." Bella followed Jane's line of vision to where Jasper was dodging an attempted butt grab from the older woman. "Of course, can you blame her after your Vice President, made that error?" Bella took a deep breath and fingered the pearls around her neck, using the familiar action to cool her temper.
"That was a regrettable error that was immediately rectified by my volunteer assistant."
"Hmm, still it shouldn't have happened, and it has obviously caused a bit of an uproar amongst the neighbors."
"There's no uproar. I think we were able to turn a mistake into a pleasant opportunity to get everyone together."
"Oh really? I've heard several of the older neighbors' comment that this never would have happened under your grandmother's watch. And I can tell you for certain it wouldn't have happened had I been the HOA President." Jane smiled darkly before turning away to melt into the crowd of seemingly happy party goers.
Bella's temper flared. "I'm not my grandmother. And I guess you'll get your chance to see if you can do a better job after the elections in May."
"I guess we will. And since you have eight more months to screw things up, I should be a shoe-in." Bella's fake smile faltered as Jane bounced away. Jane's statement had managed to poke holes in Bella's recent personal and management change. With Edward's help, she'd started to see that perhaps she'd been running the HOA a bit like a kingdom, with her reigning as the resident monarch. She'd been so focused on living up to her grandmother's legacy that she'd ruled with an iron fist, seeing no shades of gray. She'd loosened up and look what it had gotten her. A serious contender for her job, and apparently neighbors that thought she'd let her grandmother down.
"Why the long face, beautiful?" Bella breathed out in relief as the image of Edward, still in his scrubs, moved into her view.
"Please remind me that I would not look good in prison orange." Bella pleaded, wrapping her arms around his waist and laying her head on his firm chest. She breathed in his welcoming scent and took comfort in his arms. Edward was both surprised and concerned over her sudden PDA.
He pulled her to him tightly and leaned down to speak into her ear. "I think you'd look sexy in anything. But can I ask why you're worried about prison?"
Bella sighed and pulled back to look up into his concerned green eyes. "Jane, all but told me that I suck as HOA president and that she'd do a better job." She said dejectedly and then adding, "And Tanya and Lauren want to jump your bones." Edward giggled at the very unlike Bella statement.
"Don't laugh. Both comments are true."
"Bella, look around. Everyone is having a great time." Edward pointed out to the yard where Emmett was leading a large group in the bunny hop. Neighbors of all ages were laughing as they clung to each other's waists as they snaked around Rose's back yard doing the popular children's dance. She couldn't help but smile at their antics.
"And the only person who is permitted to jump my bones, is you." Edward punctuated his statement with a deep, toe-curling kiss that left Bella clinging to his blue scrub top.
"Okay." She breathed slowly, when he released her lips.
"But I still want to gouge their eyes out."