It took me a week and a half for me to grow a pair and invite Kurama over to my house. We talked daily - sometimes multiple times - but I noticed how sad I felt without physical touch. We needed to talk about it to allow our relationship to grow, right? If I kept that mindset, I could talk to him. I could do it. As long as I didn't remind myself we were going to talk about sex, I could do it.
Kurama was so sweet about the whole thing, too. He didn't push me to start talking when our only form of communication was our phones. When he came over, he handed me a bouquet of multicolored flowers with a reassuring smile. He only kissed my cheek before giving Ichigo attention. He gave me time to relax and ease into the scariest conversation in my life.
With Ichigo outside and dinner on its way, we sat beside each other at my table.
"I'm sorry I took so long to get up the nerve to talk about this," I said blushing.
"It's okay, Ichika. This is a difficult topic for most couples to talk about so openly."
"Yeah… It's awkward as hell, so I get it. I'm nervous I'm going to mess up what we have going for us."
"You won't," he said. "And if you can't talk about it today, that's okay. I'm content where we are if that's any consolation. I'm happy."
Tears flooded my eyes without my consent. "You're happy?"
Kurama got out of his seat and crouched beside mine. He smiled and took my hand. "Very."
I sniffled, laughing a little and wiping my eyes with my free hand. "I love you." It was quiet and watery, but I meant it. "I really do. I'm overwhelmed by it and you're being so patient and kind… I love you so damn much."
He was surprised, but his eyes lit up. Kurama kissed my hand and reached up to rest his palm against my cheek. I leaned into, making his smile grow. "I love you, too."
"That's good. That could have gone horribly wrong."
"Do you feel better?"
I leaned forward and rested my forehead against his. I closed my eyes. "That was just one thing off my chest. I'm still nervous about our next topic."
Kurama brushed my hair with his fingers. "Again, we can wait to talk about this later. There's no rush."
"I know, but… I don't want to wait." I moved my head to sit on top of his shoulder. "I… I don't want to waste any time with you… God, that sounds cheesy."
"We have time." He rubbed my back. "Why don't we talk about this later?"
"Would you… Could… I…" I sighed, sitting up and looking at Kurama, determined to get my words out. "Could you stay here tonight? Not to do anything! We could try talking about it when I have the cover of night on my side."
"Are you sure you want me to stay over?"
"Then I'll stay and we'll talk."
I let out a breath and laughed at myself. "I'm such a nervous wreck today."
"And you're adorable." Kurama kissed my forehead after he stood up to his full height. "There's nothing to worry about."
Dinner churned uncomfortably in my belly when I curled up in my bed that night. I pulled the covers up to my chin and stared at the space Kurama would eventually occupy.
Saito never had the privilege of lying in my bed with me. I didn't want him to. The only time I shared was when I had foster animals that could lie with me or when I let Ichigo up. Having a human to share my bed with was a new concept. I was excited and nervous.
My heart raced when the bathroom door opened. I peeked out from under my covers and my face burned instantly.
Kurama didn't go back to his place to get sleep clothes and all I had to offer was a pair of sweatpants, which I was miffed he fit in. So there he was in my room in my sweats that hung off his hips in a way they never did on me and his toned chest on display. He put his hair up in a loose ponytail, letting me see his arm and shoulder muscles in action. My boyfriend was sexy… and I was too chicken to do anything about it.
He climbed in next to me, facing me to find me hiding. He chuckled.
My eyes drifted to the exposed part of his shoulder my sheets didn't cover. How did a shoulder look so… appealing?
"Are you sure you're okay with this?"
I nodded, eyes snapping to his. "I trust you."
It got quiet. I wasn't sure how to start our conversation and I knew he was waiting for me to begin since they were ideas that came straight out of my head. It took me a minute to finally get something out.
"So… my list."
He smiled. "Yes. Where would you like to start?"
"Uh… I guess the weirdest one? The… fox thing."
"We're both humans. What foxes do in the mating process is something only they do. As Yoko, there was never any locking together because I spent my time with a human body."
"Okay. That makes me feel better."
"It was an interesting thought."
"I thought about a lot of things… as you saw."
"I'm glad you felt comfortable enough with me to bring it up." Kurama reached out for my hand and slipped his fingers between mine. "What's next?"
We didn't sleep much that night, me bringing up each item on my list and Kurama answering them honestly and realistically. I felt a little better about what we laid out for us, for our relationship. And I liked that we almost had a tiered list from what we were okay with attempting first to things that would require a more comfortable sexual relationship. I fell asleep comforted by our choices and Kurama's arms around me.
I woke up in the morning with my face wedged under his chin, my nose brushing against his collarbone. His arms were still around me and made it too hard to want to get out of bed.
I groaned and scooted closer to him. "I don't wanna wake up yet."
"You can stay in bed all day if you want to," he said. "I have no intention of disturbing you."
"You're not… You're not going to leave me when I fall asleep again, are you?"
"I'll stay if you wish it."
"I want you to stay." I hummed and rubbed my nose along his neck. His skin was so smooth. "I like you here… You should stay over more often."
He chuckled and shifted to his back. He raised his arms to let me snuggle against him again before circling me with one and brushing my hair with the other. "I'm sure that can be arranged."
"Mmm… I love you."
"I love you, too. Go back to sleep, Ichika."
My hand rested on his stomach a second before I slid it up to his chest where it stayed as I fell back into dreamland. Having him there made for the most relaxing way to wake up and fall asleep. I loved it. And I loved it more when he was still there a couple of hours later.
He was asleep with his head turned away from me. His hair was still perfect in its ponytail, which made me wish for hair that always looked that good.
I pulled myself up a little so I could hide my face in his neck. He shifted but didn't wake. Closing my eyes, I felt his heartbeat against my nose. His scent washed over me.
After a few minutes, I left a soft kiss on his neck and carefully climbed out of bed to take care of Ichigo. I sat the fox's breakfast on the floor when I heard my bedroom door open. I grinned at my sleepy boyfriend as he neared me.
"Sleep well?" I asked.
I wrapped my arms around him. "You're always welcome to stay over any time."
He smiled and kissed my nose. Slipping out of my arms, he went to the kitchen and started some breakfast.
"Do you want me to wash what you wore yesterday for you? I can't imagine you want to go home in dirty clothes."
"I don't mind either way. If you want to, I'm not opposed."
I poked my head into the kitchen. "Where'd you lay your things?"
"I left them folded in your guest room. I didn't want to leave them in the bathroom."
"Okay. Feel free to wear those sweats after you shower." I blushed suddenly. "Uh… and if you want clean underwear, I suggest you add them to your laundry."
He smirked, green eyes twinkling. "Already taken care of."
I blinked. I resisted the urge to look downward and scampered down the hall to get his things. He actually slept in my bed without underwear and I couldn't think about anything else except how ridiculously hot I found it. Sure, I was blushing from head to toe, but he felt comfortable enough with me, in my house, to sleep commando. Any resolve I had to wait a little longer slipped away at the thought.
With both of us planning for a day off, it made for a perfect day. We didn't leave my house. Lunch was ordered in. We didn't change out of our pajamas - yay for me. And we watched so many movies they started melting together. Kurama did take the time to show me some safe plants and flowers from Demon World and we talked about everything under the sun. I put out an array of blankets and pillows on the floor in front of my couch where we spent the majority of our day. It was perfect.
"Do you think we'll be together for a long time?" I asked.
"I would hope so. You're very special to me."
I brushed my fingers through his hair, tucking some behind his ear as I watched my movements. I smiled when his eyes drooped slightly. "Good. I like having you around… a lot."
He hummed deep in his chest and turned to plant a long kiss to my mouth.
I made a sound but fell into the kiss easily. My hand slid up his chest and neck where it settled in his hair. I clenched around the red locks as Kurama angled the kiss more to deepen it. My stomach flipped at the thought of things going further on my living room floor.
But he stopped with a few gentle kisses and a smile. He placed a hand on my thigh and kept it there, bringing his attention back to the movie.
"You can't just kiss me like that and leave me hanging," I said, looking back at the TV.
"Do you want more?" He squeezed my leg.
"I don't know… Yeah… Especially if you kiss me like that again."
"Are you sure? I won't do anything unless you give me a definitive yes."
I shrugged and slouched. I was confusing myself. I just needed to go for it. It would be the only way to get something started.
"Looking up, I watched Kurama spread his legs wide enough for me to sit between. He patted the floor to invite me over.
I timidly crawled over one leg and settled with my back against his chest. He was warm.
He wrapped his arms around me and put his chin on my shoulder. He nuzzled the side of my head.
"What do you want, Ichika?"
I shivered when his breath hit my ear. "You… but my heart is racing like I'm about to have a heart attack."
"We can start small if it helps."
"Small?" Ideas popped into my head and I sputtered. "Oh! Uh, ah… um… right here?"
"If you want."
I shivered and trembled from an overload of nervous energy.
Kurama chuckled as he kissed the side of my head. "It's cute how embarrassed you are."
"Should we-we bring up the topic more often so I get used to it? Or… should we… let it happen?"
Kurama pulled me closer. "Do you want me to take control of the situation? Do I need to initiate?"
I stared at his arms on my stomach. "If I ask you to stop… will you?"
"Every time. I will never force you into something you don't want to do." He paused, thinking about high school. "Never again."
Taking a few deep breaths and clenching my eyes shut for a few seconds, I decided.
His lips caressed my jaw. "If you don't tell me to stop, should we be worried about a little one? I didn't bring anything to prevent that from happening."
"Oh, um… I've got this thing in my arm." I poked the spot where the implant sat under the skin. "It's new, so… if I don't chicken out, we'll be okay."
"Do you trust me?"
Gracefully, Kurama repositioned me around so I was on my back staring up at him. He kissed my forehead followed by my lips. His hair tickled my neck, making me shiver from the feeling. Slowly, his lips trailed along my jaw and down my throat until he stopped. He sat up, resting his weight on one hip and holding himself up with one arm.
He smiled at me while his other hand reached over and caressed my face. "Whatever I do that you're uncomfortable with, say something."
I nodded, covering his hand with mine.
Kurama bent down and kissed me softly, reminding me that I was safe with him. Then his lips meandered to my jaw and my neck all while his hand trailed down the other side of my neck, over my collarbone, down the center of my chest, and settled at the hem of my shirt.
I exhaled a little louder when his fingertips glided against the skin of my stomach, my shirt being pulled up to reveal it. Goosebumps rose everywhere he touched.
He kissed my lips again before sitting back up to watch my reactions and his hand explore my skin.
The fact I forewent putting on a bra that morning didn't cross my mind until Kurama's fingers brushed against skin usually covered. I gasped and gripped the arm holding him up. His eyes shifted to mine, but he didn't stop. I didn't want him to.
Kurama didn't tease or play the higher his hand went. His fingers touched places I didn't know felt good, thus setting my skin on fire the longer he stimulated my skin. He didn't spend a lot of time around my chest, moving his hand back down to my stomach and to the waistband of my sleep pants.
We looked at each other. My grip tightened on his arm. I silently urged him forward. He kissed me again just as his hand slipped under the band of my underwear.
I sucked in a breath. My eyes closed and my legs spread apart without conscious thought. I didn't know Kurama watched me. I didn't even realize he stopped kissing me. All I knew was the feeling growing in my abdomen and the anchor I made with his arm.
My eyes shot open and my hips jerked when his finger slid inside me. Something akin to a moan left my lips before he pulled me into another kiss. Another finger joined the other while his thumb touched the spot that quickly sent me over the edge, back arching and hands clenching onto anything that kept me steady.
Kurama removed his hand completely and kissed me softly. His nose traced my cheek, making my whole body tingle as I came down from my high.
"Are you okay?" He kissed my cheek.
I nodded, eyes still closed and my body well aware of the soft blankets under me.
"Would you like to keep going?"
There was no hesitation as I nodded once more, finally looking at Kurama.
His hands calmly preoccupied themselves with the buttons on my nightshirt. When he undid the final button, my nerves came back tenfold at the thought of him seeing me naked with so much light coming into the living room. Instead, Kurama let the shirt fall back against my skin, leaving a couple of inches of flesh between the two parts.
His lips pressed against my throat and followed the line of flesh down to my stomach until he gripped my pants on either side of my hips. He looked at me with intense eyes. "Do you still want this?"
An overwhelming amount of emotion coursed through me as I sat up to captured his lips while nodding. I held onto his shoulders to keep me from melting onto the floor in front of him.
With his lips still attached to mine, he laid me back. He let me kiss him over and over before returning to his original task.
He didn't stare when he tossed my bottoms aside. He brought both hands to my thighs, squeezed once, and then crawled back up to my lips.
Something about Kurama crawling up to meet our lips together sent my hormones to the moon. The way he was so gentle kissing me after doing something so unbelievably sexy didn't help either.
One more kiss and he shifted up higher, leaving me to stare at his chest. I was confused by the action until he took one of my hands and placed it at the waist of his sweatpants. It clicked. I leaned up to kiss his chest to tell him I understood.
Before I could think myself nervous again, I used both hands and tugged down. I was slightly distracted by the soft sigh from Kurama's mouth, but far more aware of what I revealed. My brain couldn't compute how he was supposed to fit inside me. There was no way. No way.
Kurama noticed my pause and sat back, straddling my waist. I was veryaware of what nudged my stomach.
"We'll go at your pace, Ichika." He took my hands and squeezed them. "If you want to stop, tell me."
No matter how foreign the male physique was to me, I didn't want to stop. Yes, the way we were going to join together was strange, but I wanted it to happen. If his fingers were any indication of how it would feel, I would be okay… I hoped as I glanced down.
Kurama chuckled lightly. "Come here." He scooted back to sit between my knees, removing his pants in the process.
I sat up and let him pull me a little closer. It put me extremely close to what I was nervous about.
"Give me your hand."
My eyes widened. "W-Why?"
"If you want us to go further, I'm going to help you feel more comfortable, okay? I'm not forcing you to do this and I'll stop right now. I want you to be comfortable since you're in control. Do you want to do this or not?"
"No, I do."
He held his hand out. "Let me help you then."
Timidly, I placed my hand in his and stared into his eyes.
"Relax. There's nothing to be scared of."
I watched closely as Kurama brought my hand down. He wrapped my fingers around him before letting go of my hand completely. I was aware of the pulsing of his heart and the way he paused to ease his breathing. Unintentionally, my hand twitched, tightening around him. His breathing techniques went out the window as his eyes fluttered shut and he let out a long breath.
"I didn't…I didn't mean to-"
Kurama's laugh was light, airy. "No. It's okay. It was a good thing." He opened his eyes again. "You're supposed to do that. I want you to. Learn how I react, how it feels… Get used to it. I'll tell you went I can't take it anymore."
He leaned in to kiss my lips, causing him to shift in my hand just as I clenched it. He made a sound of surprised pleasure and laughed again. He nuzzled my head. "I may not last. My human body isn't accustomed to a woman's touch like Yoko was."
"What should I do then?" I took my hand away, my face red from the sound he made.
"Don't worry about it. From what I understand, it isn't unusual for men to lose themselves quickly the first time they sleep with a woman."
"So… should we… ya know?"
"As long as you're willing."
"You don't have to keep checking in with me, Kurama…"
He took my mouth with his sweetly. "I do. I want you to have every opportunity to stop this if you're uneasy. I love you and want you to decide where this ends."
Thinking, I looked into Kurama's eyes. Then my gaze traveled down his chest and lower still. Heat pooled in my lower abdomen at the sight of him, legs spread out to accommodate me and what I knew I wanted.
With brave movements, I got up on my knees and crawled closer, straddling his waist. I looked down at him and he gazed up at me. His hands gripped my hips while he kissed my stomach. My hands shook as I reached down to grab him again and lined my self up awkwardly. I barely sank down onto him when I had to pause. It hurt. It wasn't so bad I wanted to stop, but it didn't feel good.
"Take your time," he breathed, kissing my skin again.
I lowered myself a little more. Kurama closed his eyes again, his hands tightening on my hips. And again I moved. It already hurt less and made a low sound rise out of Kurama. That was enough to sit all the way down… just to hear the sound again mingled in with my own moan.
Wrapping my arms around his shoulders, I rested against him, getting used to the feeling of him inside me. My muscles twitched slightly, each time causing Kurama to breathe a little faster.
"Are you… Do you feel… okay?"
The strain in his voice sent my hips into a short motion, leaving both of us struggling to breathe.
"S-Sorry," I whispered, pressing my front against his to hold myself still. I wanted to stay there until we couldn't bear it any longer. "I feel… a lot."
A chuckle. One of his hands left my hip and traveled southward, touching me again. I gasped, grinding my hips against him. "Just wait," he said before capturing my mouth.
As his fingers moved against me, I moved against him. A few times I felt him barely slide out of me as I let my body move as it wanted, sounds escaping my lips in ways that would embarrass me later.
It was the moment I felt him finish and he moaned in my ear when the feeling inside me burst for a second time. His arms held me steady as I sighed and rode the feeling out until Kurama could no longer take the stimulation. He pulled out, but let me slow against his fingers.
My lips met his in a slow deep kiss once I settled on his lap. My fingers tangled in his hair and I tilted my head.
Kurama broke the kiss eventually with a low laugh. "We need to take a moment before instigating anything else. As much as I would like to repeat that again, I physically cannot go again for a moment. The curse of being a man, I suppose."
"Mmm…" I kissed him again. "I understand. My brain still needs to catch up… What… What does my soul feel like?"
"Pure… warm… like it was meant to be with me."
"Sounds… overwhelming." I ran my fingers through his hair to bring me closer to Earth.
"Maybe we should clean up."
I nodded. "Shower together?"
He smiled. "I'll smell like you."
"I don't care. I'm more interested in what could happen… again."
"All it took was one time for you to become addicted."
"Because of you."
Kurama left a light kiss on my shoulder. "Come on."
He helped me to my feet, shedding me of my sleep shirt with a long kiss, and leading me to my bathroom.
"It finally happened," Shizuru smirked.
It was a month later and New Year's Eve. Yukina invited everyone up to a temple belonging to an older woman named Genkai - someone special to the spirit detectives. I liked her. She was the perfect amount of snarky, especially toward Yusuke.
Kurama and I didn't get to see our friends much during the month because of their travel and our busyness with other less wholesome things. So Shizuru hadn't seen me since before Kurama and I slept together.
"Why do you think that?"
"Aside from your perky attitude? Kurama's aura has a bit of you mixed in. The soul transfer thing, right?"
"Guess so. Only happened the first time though. He doesn't want to eat it like Saito, so it probably became a part of him. I don't understand it."
"First time? When did it happen first and how many times has it happened since?"
"Uh, the first time was a little over a month ago… and basically every day since."
Shizuru whistled. "Damn. No wonder you two look so happy. You really found something special, huh?"
"Yeah." I looked to where Kurama was playing a strategy game with Yusuke, Genkai, and Kuwabara. "I'm really happy."
"I know. Your aura is trying to blind me."
I laughed. "Can't help it."
Botan came over with finger food for us. "What are you ladies jabbering about?"
"Kurama and Ichika had sex."
"Shizuru!" I gasped.
"What? And you didn't tell me?! When?"
"Apparently, a month ago," Shizuru answered.
Botan's mouth hung open. "A month ago?! Why didn't you say anything?!"
"I love you, Botan, but I don't go around announcing when I have sex to my friends."
"They've been busy doing it every day. They're trying to beat the libido of rabbits."
"Every day?! Oh, my…"
I shrugged. "Kurama is good looking and… and I really like him."
"And I'm sure a certain body part of his," Shizuru teased.
"Well, yeah, but I love him for him. He's amazing."
"Aw! Have you told him you love him?"
"Uh-huh. I started crying because he was being so sweet. It was after he stayed the night."
"You two just did everything in the same night."
"We didn't have sex until the next day… after lunch."
Botan took my hand. "What was it like? Where did it happen? What is Kurama like?"
"Uh… it was the best feeling in the world… living room floor… and he was sweet, caring."
"What's he got going on?" Shizuru smirked, lighting up a cigarette.
"That is something only I get to know."
"Are there any odd places you've… you know?"
"Botan… do you really want to know these things?"
"Yes… for research!"
"Are you finally making a move on the prince?"
"What!? No! I just don't think I'll be single for the rest of my existence…"
I chuckled. "Why odd places? Are you into some weird stuff?"
Shizuru crossed her arms, her smirk still in place.
"Okay. If I hear that you've told anyone anything I tell you, I will kill you. Got it?"
"All right. My personal favorite was the counter. Watching things happen is… well, it's hot and really gets things going." I blushed. "I think Kurama prefers our beds because I'm less likely to get hurt if we do something a little, uh, a little rougher. The weirdest place, but also the most thrilling, was in the library in Koenma's palace."
"You did that there!?"
"I wanted to look at more of the books about Demon World and Spirit World, so Kurama asked if we could go to the library. Koenma agreed and we went. We didn't mean for it to happen. I accidentally came across a book about soul transfers… things sorta went from there when Kurama agreed with the description of what it feels like in a moment of passion. I started it."
"Wow. I didn't expect you two to be so… adventurous."
"I don't think Kurama expected it either. Even with my list of ideas."
The three of us noticed our friends gathering over by the stairs that led up to the temple where the whole city was in view.
"As much as I'm sure you want to hear about my love life, I would like to go join my boyfriend before the fireworks start."
"Keep it PG-13," Shizuru said as I skipped over to Kurama who waited patiently for me in the distance.
I kissed him. "Hi."
"I'm here with you… with our friends."
The bridge of his nose turned a flattering pink against his pale complexion. "What were you talking about with Shizuru and Botan?"
"Don't be embarrassed, but I was talking to them about us. I didn't give them details, I promise. Botan wanted to know weird places we've… yeah."
"Women talk about anything, don't they?"
"I guess so. I couldn't resist answering them. I love talking about you. You're perfect."
Kurama pulled me into a sweet kiss. "If anyone is perfect, it's you, Ichika."
"You're so cute," I said, kissing him back.
"Hey, disgusting couple!" Yusuke shouted out. "Quit confessing your love for each other and get over here! You're gonna miss the countdown!"
Laughing, I pulled Kurama behind me to join our friends. I sat on a step and urge Kurama to do the same. He sat behind me, allowing me to settle between his knees, my head falling back against his chest. His arms circled my shoulders and I grabbed his forearms to hold him there.
Eventually, we started the countdown to midnight, our shouts getting louder as we neared the end of the year. Fireworks shot up into the sky all over the city in celebration.
I only saw a few fireworks before Kurama tilted my head back to plant a loving kiss on my mouth. He stopped long enough to whisper good wishes for the new year. I responded by bringing him back to my lips, my hand pulling him closer at the back of his head.
"You two are making me sick."
Without hesitation, I went into another kiss with a lot of tongue while flipping Yusuke off.
Kurama exited the kiss chuckling and wiping his mouth. He did the same for me and left a final peck before helping me to my feet.
The party ended there, each friend returning to their respective homes. Kurama came home with me, happy to rein in the new year in a way only we could - thanks to my coaxing.
As I went to bed that night wrapped up in Kurama's arms and my face tucked into his neck, I felt the excitement of a new year with him bubble over. I didn't know what it would bring. I just knew I couldn't wait to see. And what a year it would be.
And that's the end! This could have probably ended after Saito, but I couldn't stop writing. I don't know how often this kind of content will be in my stories, but if the story goes that way, I don't tend to shy away from it. I don't like to write it out in detail (this is as close to the details smut I see others write), but it's a part of life, so it will happen naturally. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this story! Thanks for reading it! -S. M. Graham