Disclaimer:

This story is Tenhawks, I own nothing. I don't know why Tenhawk only posted 2 chapters of this story on FFN, but that how it is. I managed to find a copy of this story on wayback machine of his personal website (fanfiction tenhawkpresents com), which is dead now, with a bit more than 2 chapters, and decided to post it here, because I like it, and I don't want it to disappear. If Tenhawk doesn't like that I reposted his story, he should contact me and I will take it down. If anyone has a copy of this story that has more chapters, please contact me, I would like to read them.

Story:


Salem Massachusetts.

The Explosion that rocked the small estate outside Salem would likely have gone entirely unnoticed had it been even slightly smaller. The fact that it threw debris up into the air almost three thousand feet, however, and rained it down on the town of Salem put an end to any hope the Governing Board had of keeping it quiet from the locals.

Luckily, they were tolerant of such things in Salem, having learned a long time ago that it was best to ignore the unusual as much as possible. The last time they'd really paid attention to the small estate had been in Sixteen Ninety Three, and they'd paid a price for trying to draw the Institute into their petty games of morality, religion, and politics.

Even so, the damage control was difficult, as the local media started looking for the cause of the explosion and source of the raining debris, locals began expounding on old legends and things best left quiet, and the Institute found itself rather tightly pressed and actually unable to put their normal level of enthusiasm into repairs and such.

Additionally, the explosion was proving... difficult to... well, stop.


"Good Lord, Arthur, what were they mixing in there?" Stephen Smythe muttered, eyeing the gout of flame that was still coming from the Alchemical Laboratories.

"I have my doubts we'll ever entirely know, Stephen," Arthur Fitzpatrick sighed, rubbing his long beard as he subtly shook his head. "I suppose we should move on to new business, however."

Stephen rolled his eyes.

Only Arthur could speak casually of new business while a third of the institute's grounds was covering in what basically amounted to lava, and choking black smoke continued to pour into the sky. He supposed that being a hundred and twenty years old had a generally calming effect on the man.

"Very well," He sighed, "I suppose that the most pressing is new students. The explosion has destroyed much of our Freshman facilities, including the Dorms."

"Yes, I know, Stephen." Arthur sighed, "I believe I have a solution, however."

"Oh?" Stephen asked, idly, his mind trying to identify where they would build new facilities.

"Until we get this under control, rebuilding is... of course... out of the question," Arthur said thoughtfully, "And I'm reliably informed that it will be at least six months before we can shut down the eruptions."

Stephen groaned.

"Six months? Sir, that's intolerable."

"I quite agree, however reality often is." Arthur said in kind. "What I have proposed, and the Board has accepted, is that we offer new students placement overseas for the next year."

"Oh, Sir, you know that's not going to go over well with the parents. Too many of their families left Europe specifically to keep their children from growing up with that bunch of lunatics."

Arthur glared at him crossly, but Stephen merely stared back unapologetically until the old man sighed.

"Yes, well, be that as it may I think we can convince them. It is only for a year, after all, and it's good for a child to be exposed to other cultures."

"Bog Rot." Stephen opined.

"Your opinion is, of course, noted. However, the proposal has been voted on and passed." Arthur told him, "We'll divide up the new names and make the presentations to the parents. If they refuse, well there is the option of home schooling."

"Five gets you ten that's what most do."

"Do I look like easy money, Stephen?"


Stephen Smythe sighed as he looked over the lists, casually dividing up the names and trying to determine who would go where, at least in theory. In practice it was futile, but there would be some who would accept.

He eyed the lists carefully, noting which families could afford proper home schooling, and shifted those names lower on the list. The offer would still be made, of course, but they were far less likely to accept. He bit his lower lip when one of those names crossed his attention, however, and hesitated.

This family could certainly afford home schooling, and in fact he was surprised they had submitted their daughter to the lists to begin with. That said, getting one of THEM out of the country... there were some people who'd worship him for that alone, and the family as a whole tended to be very close... who knew? They might all leave for a while.

He moved that name far up on the list.

It was wishful thinking, he supposed, but he needed what bright spots he could find.

He chuckled softly to himself then looked over the rest of the names. No standouts that he could see, not after THEM... but two names did catch his eye. Not because of the names, but rather the location.

'Oh Lord, we have two possible students growing up in Sunnydale?' He stared, "Good God."

He reached for the intercom, "Sam, could you come in here please?"

A moment later Samantha Hennessy strode into the room, her tailored suit formed impeccably to her body, and she nodded, "Yes Sir?"

"I need you to get a recruiter out to Sunnydale immediately."

"Sunnydale?" Her eyes bugged.

"Yes, I'm afraid we just picked up a couple names there," He sighed, "Just showed up on the roles recently, I assume, or we'd have sent someone out there long ago."

"Uh... Yes Sir. The names?"

"Alexander Harris and Willow Rosenberg."


Westfield New Jersey, 0001 Cemetery Lane.

The recruiter winced as he looked at the house, shivering at even the *thought* of going inside the grounds. Everyone in the Community new full well to steer clear of the Addams', it was an unwritten rule so widely known that it had actually been written down. He steeled himself and pushed open the gate, steadily making his way up the lane to the house.

Once there he mentally reviewed the thirty eight poisonous or otherwise deadly species of fauna and flora living in their front yard and made a silent note to have the rest of the area combed by members of The Force who specialized in mystical cleanup. He didn't expect that they'd find anything, the Addams were many things but clumsy was not one of them, but it wouldn't do for many of the examples he'd spotted in the fifteen foot walk to make their way into normal New Jersey.

He stopped at the door and sighed, again steeling himself, then pressed the bell.

A scream greeted his efforts and he grimaced.

Footsteps were heard a moment later, and the door swung slowly open.

"Youuuuuuuu Rannnnnnnng?" A seven foot tall monstrosity demanded in a long drawn out groan, looking down at him with a calmly detached appearance.

The recruiter forced himself not to run.

'It's not a Golem, it's not a Golem, it's not a golem,' He told himself, hoping it was true. Again he had to remind himself that the Addams' weren't actually evil. Far from it, in truth. They were, in fact, one of the most well-known mainstays against Evil in the new World. The problem was that only someone who access to their full files, and a Bureau Seer, would ever believe it.

"Yes, Recruiter Henri to see Mr. and Mrs. Addams."

The Golem... 'Not a golem. NOT a golem...' just stepped back and turned away, apparently expecting to be followed. Simon Henri took a deep breath and did as he was bade.


Sunnydale, California.

Elizabeth Berkley shuddered. She truly hated being the Junior Recruiter assigned to Los Angeles. Whenever there was some little bit of nastiness that involved one of the Institutes students SHE had to be the one sent to handle it. The entire damned state was a loony bin, in her opinion, what with the demons and hellmouth burning so brightly.

It probably had to do with the geological activity of the area, or so most people believed. Geomancy was an ancient practice, almost entirely lost today, but the power in many of those old monoliths was proof enough in its potency. Much of the state was a power sink of one type or another, such that even the normal types were affected.

One didn't have to look much further than Hollywood or San Francisco for that.

She sighed and determined to get on with it, however, and came to her first stop.

The residence of one Alexander Harris.

She looked up at the number by the door, confirming it, and knocked.

After a long wait the door opened and she found herself looking down at a young boy of ten years.

"Yes?" He asked.

"Are your parents home, Alexander?"

The boy stared at her for a long time, then nodded. "Mom's here."

"May I speak to her?"

"I guess."

The boy backed into the house, shrugged, and left the door open. "She's in the kitchen."

Elizabeth sighed and stepped over the threshold, noting the total absence of any protective wards or even the most basic level of protections that even normal households enjoyed.

'Perhaps they just moved in,' she thought, then instantly recognized that wasn't the case as the place looked far too... well, 'lived in' was being charitable. She shook her head, put the thoughts out of her mind, and made her way into the kitchen.

"Mom! There's a lady here to see you!"

Elizabeth's expression soured involuntarily as she noted the open bottle on the table and the smell of liquor floating up from the woman inside. 'Oh lord, I hate these calls.'

"Who're you?" The woman asked, with just a barely detectable slur.

"I'm Elizabeth Berkley, with the Salem Institute..."

That threw a shot of steel into the woman's spine almost instantly as she froze in place and the room became very quiet.

"Mom? What's wrong?" The boy asked.

"Quiet for a moment, Alexander," Jessica Lavelle said softly as she focused on the woman in her kitchen. "What are you doing here?"

"Alexander's name has come up on our roles and..."

"He's... He's one?"

"A Wizard? Yes, of course." Elizabeth said, sounding confused.

"I didn't think... I'm not, you see... My family didn't take it well..."

"Ah." Elizabeth sighed, beginning to get the picture. Some of the older families were still mired in the Old World, unfortunately, "I suppose they called you a Squib among other names?"

Jessica sighed, but nodded as she looked at her bottle.

The Recruiter shook her head and examined her notebook, "Yes, unfortunately that doesn't surprise me. Your husband, he's the same?"

"Yes."

"The Harris family and the Lavelles, unsurprising I suppose." Elizabeth sighed yet again. "Both originate from Ireland, your lines are not the oldest in America of course, but they are still as close to aristocrats as we tend to get. A lot of familiar inertia gets built up there, I'm afraid."

"But... Alexander is?"

"On our lists, yes." Elizabeth smiled slightly, getting a better feel for the situation. Perhaps it wasn't entirely unsalvageable after all. "He would have been enrolled in the Institute for next year, however..."

"Would have?" Jessica paled, "Why? What's wrong with him?"

"Absolutely nothing, I'm sure. No, the problem is a slight accident in the Alchemical Laboratories has left the Institute unable to handle a Freshman year in the next session," Elizabeth sighed, "For that reason we're offering support with home schooling..."

"But we can't teach him... we... we just *can't*..."

"Yes, we're aware, the other option is overseas schooling," Elizabeth suggested. "We've contacted several respected institutions, including your families traditional alma mater in Scotland, if you wish we can arrange a one year scholarship there while we work out other options closer to home."

"Scholarship? We can't afford much..." Jessica said, "Our families..."

"In this case I believe that we can arrange tuition and transport. That covers room and board, though Alexander will require any of his own spending money."

"I... I can convince Tony of that..." Jessica said, a stray gleam of hope in her eyes.

"Excellent. I'll leave you to it, then, please... contact us as soon as you make your decision," Elizabeth paused, "Uh, you DO know how to contact us, don't you?"

"Yes, yes of course."

"Excellent," She said again. "Well I have another stop to make, then I can get clear of this town."

The Recruiter made her exit quickly, not noting the confusion on Jessica's face as she spoke her parting words. Confusion quickly passed though as she turned to Alexander, who was looking at her with curiosity burning in his eyes.

"What was that about, mom?"

"That..." Jessica swallowed, trying to moisten her mouth, "That was someone who wants to offer you a place in a special school."

"What kind?"

"Remember the stories I told you about magic?"

"The bedtime stories?" Alexander grinned, "Course!"

"That kind of school."

"C'mon mom," The boy laughed, "Those were made up!"

Jessica shook her head. "No, they were real."

Alexander frowned, "But... they can't be real. They're about *magic*!"

"I swear to you, I didn't make them up."

Alexander thought about it for a long moment, then brightened suddenly. "Cool! Wait till I tell Willow and Jessie!"

Jessica smiled, "I think you might have a hard time convincing them until you get your wand and learn some spells, and you won't be allowed to do magic outside of school for a few years anyway."

"Aw... that sucks." The boy pouted, then frowned, "Wait... if I go to this school..."

His face scrunched up as he thought it through, then suddenly dropped as it clicked. "What about Jessie and Willow!?"

"Alex... they can't go..."

"Then I don't wanna go either!"

"Alex..."

"No! I wanna stay with Jessie and Willow..."

"Alexander Levalle Harris!" Jessica snapped, quieting him, "This is a very big deal, and it's important for you. Jessie and Willow will be here in the summers, but this chance won't come around again. You ARE going to go."

"I don't wanna!" Alexander yelled back, "I don't wanna and you can't make me!"

"Alex...!" Jessica said, reaching out as Xander broke free and ran out the back door.

She sighed, shaking her head. Nothing was ever easy, it seemed.


New Jersey.

"Ah! Lurch, dear boy, who was it at the door?"

"Guest." The huge man groaned out as Simon came up behind him. "Recruiter..."

"Oh? For what?" The man in the purple suit asked with a grin as he pulled the cigar from his mouth, "Have the Dodgers come to their senses and realized what they missed out on in Fester?"

Simon paused, then shook his head, "Uh no... I'm here about... umm... Wednesday?"

"I didn't know she played baseball?" The man frowned, confused.

"I don't think he's with the Dodgers, dear." a woman in a form fitting black dress glided to the man's side. "Why don't we let the man speak, shall we chéri?"

"Tish! That's French!"

Simon just stared as the man grabbed the woman's arm and began kissing it obsessively.

"Later, dear Gomez..."

"Huh? Oh, right!" Gomez Addams said, eyes snapping to Simon again, "Now, what was this about?"

"I'm with the Salem Institute," Simon began, "Your daughter's name turned up on our roles recently and..."

"But of course she did," Mortisha said simply, "We submitted her name years ago."

"Uh... yes, well you see there's a problem."

"Problem? With Wednesday?" Gomez frowned, "Don't be absurd."

"No, with the Institute, actually. You see there was an explosion and..."

"Say no more, how much to you need!?" Gomez asked, producing a checkbook from thin air. "Five million?"

"Uh..."

"Ten!"

"No, you see..."

"You drive a hard bargain, Sir... Twenty it is!" Gomez said, scrawling out numbers on the check.

"Sir, no, that's not the issue...!"

"Then what is it? Speak up, man!" Gomez said, exasperated.

"The repairs will take time, money isn't an issue, however we don't have room to accommodate a freshman class this year." Simon sighed, "We've discussed options with the board, and are willing to help with home schooling..."

"We can manage, I'm sure," Mortisha said, frowning, "But poor Wednesday was so looking forward to meeting other children."

"Well, there is another possibility," Simon said tentatively. "The Institute has contacted several schools overseas and is prepared to offer placement with them, for the first year at least. Possibly more."

"Send our little girl overseas!? Nonsense, wouldn't think of it!" Gomez countered.

"Dear, she did so want to play with other children."

Gomez frowned, "Well yes, I know, but..."

"It's not the hardship you might think, Mr. Addams," Simon offered, "She would return each holiday, and all summer of course... Even at the Institute most children don't come home more than that."

"He's right, dear."

Gomez frowned thoughtfully, "Well we'll talk to Wednesday about it and let you know."

"That would be perfect, Sir."


Sunnydale.

Alexander 'Xander' Harris bolted from his home and ran through the backyards and driveways to the one place he knew someone would listen to him. He didn't want to live his friends, couldn't his mother get that? What was so special about some dumb magic school anyway? It was probably all some stupid joke, people always played stupid jokes on him and his friends.

They didn't do it *twice*, but there was always some new moron who thought they were soft and weak and unable to look out for themselves. Xander had learned the hard way how to deal with Bullies, at least the way that worked for him. He wasn't big enough to fight them, so he took the beatings when he had to, but he didn't forget.

Don't get mad, his dad had told him once while he was sober. Get even.

Still, this didn't sound like a joke. His mom sounded serious.

Xander ran up to the Rosenberg house a minute later, frowning as he heard yelling from inside.

'No one yells at Willow...'

He approached cautiously, the yelling getting louder and louder, then suddenly the door flew open and he was surprised to see the lady from earlier get pushed out hard by Mr. Rosenberg.

"And stay out of my home you... you... charlatan! I won't have your apostasy in my home! Come here to corrupt my daughter! Get out! Get out of here I say!"

The woman huffed, gathering herself up, and turned on her heel. Xander watched as she strode away, blinking in surprise. Mr. Rosenberg never got that angry at anyone.

He was almost afraid to approach so he watched from the corner of the house as the woman looked around briefly, then drew out a stick and muttered something before vanishing in a crack that sounded like a gunshot from the movies. Xander's eyes widened in shock as he took it in.

'Magic IS real!'

He swallowed, sneaking around back, and climbed the tree to Willow's room. Her dad was really angry, so he knew she'd be up there. He tapped on the window and she opened it almost instantly.

"Hey." She said, subdued.

"Hey. You ok?"

"Yeah," She said, "Dad's really mad."

"Yeah, I saw him toss the magic lady out." Xander said, shrugging. "I guess you're not going to that school, huh?"

Willow's eyes widened, "How did you know about that?"

"She came to my place first," Xander said glumly, "Mom is excited, she says I have to go."

"What? You can't! Magic doesn't exist!"

"I just watched that lady vanish right off the street, Wills... and my Mom says it does." Xander told her.

"That's impossible," Willow told him with supreme confidence.

Xander just shrugged, "Between reality and my own eyes, I'm gonna go with my eyes, Wills."

"But... but... you *can't* believe in magic!" Willow blurted, "It's... it's... stupid!"

"Hey," Xander forced a grin, "This is me we're talking about."


New Jersey.

"Scotland?" The young witch asked laconically. "I'm to go to Scotland?"

"Only if you really want to," Gomez said hurriedly, assuring her. "You're an Addams, we can arrange a tutor and..."

"Scotland will do. It's a good school, correct?" Wednesday asked, one eyebrow raising as she looked at her mother.

"One of the best," Mortisha said after some thought, "Though it IS in Europe, and they have... different ways than here in America."

"Oh?"

"More steeped in the old traditions, less willing to see that not everything different is bad." The woman sighed. "I'm afraid that they would look very crossly on Lurch and Thing there."

To someone who didn't know her, Wednesday's expression didn't change, but her family noted the frown the instant it crossed her face and even the normally ebullient Gomez sighed and settled deeper into his chair.

"The Old World Addams' don't involve themselves much with the Wizards and their type," Gomez said tiredly. "We're not welcome with them, and to be honest we're fine with that."

"I see."

"You don't have to go, dear," Mortisha said, "this decision is entirely yours."

"I want to go." the young girl said calmly. "It feels... right."

The two elder Addams' exchanged concerned looks, but there was nothing left to say after that. Their daughter had made up her mind, and that... well, was that.


Sunnydale, 2 Weeks to end of Summer Vacation.

Xander shifted nervously, eyeing the man who'd been sent to pick him up with some trepidation.

"No need to be worried, Alex," His mother smiled at him. "You'll do fine."

"He'd better." Tony grumbled, thinking about the couple thousand dollars he'd put up for spending money for the boy.

"Now dear, don't be like that." Jessica said mildly, but shooting her husband an arched glare.

Tony sighed, his head nodded, and he turned to his Son. "Now listen to me, boy. I know a few things about what I'm going to tell you here."

Xander nodded, eyes wide as his father leaned over.

"Lots of kids in that school are probably gonna give you crap about being..." Tony frowned, looking over at the school representative from Salem. "What do they call it over there?"

"I believe you're looking for the term 'Muggle-born'," The man said smoothly.

"Yeah, right. That." Tony turned back to his son, "I know you've been reading those books we got you from Salem, right?"

Xander nodded, "Yes sir."

Tony half smirked, shaking his head at the comment as he leaned in to whisper, "And less I miss my guess you got your redheaded friend to help you learn 'em, right?"

Xander nodded again.

"Ok, now listen close boy." Tony said sternly, "You don't start no trouble with anyone, but don't you roll over for any of em either. You remember what I told you about bullies, right?"

Xander nodded, "I remember."

"You're no fighter, boy, but you don't need to be to take on a Bully. So you remember what I said and you'll do fine." Tony said gruffly. "Long as you don't act stupid in class and get kicked out."

"Tony!"

"What?"

Jessica shook her head, shoving her husband out of the way, "You'll be fine, Alex. Now listen you Mr. Graden, try not to get in any trouble, and do your best. Ok?"

"Ok mom." Xander said, sighing as he thought about the goodbyes he'd already exchanged with his best friends. Things were moving so fast, and he felt pretty lost.

"Ok, now go along."

The representative of the Salem Institute smiled at him as Xander nodded and turned in his direction.

"Come along, Alexander. Next stop, Salem."


New Jersey.

"Ready to go, dear?"

"Yes Mother."

"Fabulous," Gomez said, clapping his hands. "We'll run you up there ourselves. It's been ages since we've seen Salem."

"Hmmm... The witch burning museum was quite amusing," Mortisha conceded, "But I was terribly disappointed with all the false advertising."

"Yes well, it's not easy to get ghosts to haunt restaurants, I suppose," Gomez shrugged.

"Perhaps, but you'd think that the Hotel would know better."

"Come now, darling, forgive and forget... we'll try another place this time, alright?"

"Yes, of course, dear... Merci."

"Tish! That's French!"


Salem.

The tugging sensation in his gut let go and Xander stumbled, almost falling before Grading caught him, and he blinked to find himself somewhere other than his home.

"Whoa."

"Careful there," Thomas Grading said with a calm smile. "Port keys can take some getting used to. You alright?"

Xander nodded, swallowing as he looked at what appeared to be a thirty foot tall volcano in the middle of school grounds. "Uh..."

"Oh, that." Grading sighed, "Yes, well, suffice to say that freshmen should always be monitored while playing in the alchemical labs."

"Students did THAT?" Xander stared, wide eyed, between the volcano and the man.

"Yes, unfortunately."

"Wow. I've never done anything THAT destructive before."

"I should hope not," Grading chuckled, "Very few students get a chance to blow up their school."

"A fonder dream I have never had." Xander replied with a grin.

Tom laughed, "Maybe it's better we're shipping you out to Hogwarts."

"What kind of name is that anyway?" Xander asked, humor still lacing his voice.

"Oh, I think you'll find that the Old World wizards are full of strange names and terms." Grading said, sighing now. "They're really quite backward, at least by our standards of culture. Don't underestimate them for it, however, their magical science is just as advanced as anything we've developed, and they're even more comfortable with it."

"Oh yeah?"

"Yes... this way please," Grading said, guiding Xander away from the volcano, "They isolate themselves from the normal world, what they call 'muggles', and are entirely immersed in magic. We tend to mix a great deal more here, and generally have far fewer laws on the subject... well, far fewer laws in general really..."

"Why's that?"

"Well, American witches and wizards mostly came over here to get away from the Old World way of doing things... and not very many came over, really, all things considered..." Tom said, steering his charge to the dormitories. "There was so much room here that a few hundred wizarding families could really spread out and only interact when they chose to. We didn't really HAVE a government until almost the Second World War, and only created what we have now in self-defense."

"Huh?"

"Let's just say that the war was a little more complicated than you probably learned and leave it at that," Tom sighed, "The European theatre was a terrible mess, entire wizarding communities were caught in the crossfire... and to make matters worse, the whole Grindlewald affair actually set off a fair portion of the war..."

"The uh... what?"

"Oh dear," Tom sighed, "You have a great deal to learn about the history of the magical world, but I'm afraid we don't have much time for it now. I'll make certain you get some reference books on it."

"Okay." Xander said, unenthused by the prospect.

It wasn't that he didn't want to know, but reading was a pain. Still, the magic books were sometimes kinda cool, with moving pictures and the like. He brightened up, there might be moving pictures of the war, and he'd always been interested in World War Two. If there was other stuff going on he'd never heard about, well he wanted to know about it.

"Here we are," Tom said, "You'll be staying here until we gather the other students, then we'll send you all on together."

Xander looked at the dormitory and his eyes widened. From the outside it had looked fairly common, but inside it was huge and filled with posters and bookshelves and all kinds of things.

"Feel free to peruse the books, you can pick any of the rooms as you're the first here. Just drop your things off and the room will automatically recognize it as yours." Tom told him, "I'll have a history of Hogwarts sent to you... please, look it over... you don't want to be completely unprepared... particularly concerning their House System."

"Huh?"

"Hogwarts divides its students up into groups according to their... defining motivations," Tom said, considering his words. "Courage, Loyalty, Intelligence, and... well, Ruthlessness I suppose."

Xander recognized the word quickly enough and frowned, "Funny thing to have kids try to be."

"Yes well, the Old World is set in its ways, and Hogwarts has been around for a long time. It's very much the magical world's version of Oxford, complete with some rather odd traditions, but a very high standard of academic excellence." Tom replied. "We don't use the house system here, of course."

Xander nodded, thinking about it. Where would he wind up, he wondered? He liked to think he was brave, and he was pretty sure he was loyal... ok, he probably wasn't going to win any points for brains. Ruthless, well... he had to be honest, he could be that if he had to be. Didn't like it though, so he didn't know what the school would make of that.

"I'll leave you be then," Tom told him, heading out.

Xander nodded, said bye, then went to find a room.


Ok, the books WERE really cool, Xander had to admit.

The 'A History of Hogwarts' was *huge*, and filled with some of the dullest stuff he'd ever imagined, but at the same time it had pages and pages of all kinds of cool stuff. Wizards sure were funny looking in Europe, Xander decided after only a few chapters.

And what was with the names?

Man, if he'd been named like any of those guys he'd have spent his entire scholastic life with his head in a toilet. When he thought of how easy it was to give someone a stupid nickname in Sunnydale, then looked at names like 'Dumbledore' and Slytherin... well, he was just real glad he was named Alexander. Xander wasn't so bad as far as nicknames went.

'Probably shouldn't mention that though,' He thought, 'they might not know how stupid their names are.'

The house system was kinda cool, once he went through it. Gryffindor got the brave kids, Hufflepuff got the loyal ones, Ravenclaw got all the nerds, and Slytherin... well, there he wasn't sure. There was something wrong about the stuff printed about Slytherin, something that didn't read exactly true.

Xander wasn't a big reader, but he could read between the lines pretty easy. Lots of people didn't like Slytherin's, that was for sure. Still, from what he could tell there was nothing wrong with them on paper. The key traits weren't ruthlessness, as Tom had said, but the willingness to see a goal through to the end, even if you had to get a little dirty to do it.

Ok, maybe that was ruthless, but there was nothing wrong it that in Xander's opinion. Just kinda dangerous, since it didn't leave any guidelines for what your goal was supposed to be. Lots of room for pricks to make everyone look bad there.

He put it aside, having found out what he wanted to know, and sighed as he settled into his temporary room.

He was long way from home, he realized, and it felt pretty scary.

Maybe if he didn't like it, he could go back to Sunnydale... and Willow and Jessie.

He kinda wished Willow's dad had let her come, but then Jessie would be alone and that would suck too. He took a breath, forcing himself not to feel too bad.

Better he feel bad than Jessie or Willow, Xander was used to it. He could take it. As long as he knew his friends had each other, he could keep on moving forward.


It was two days later, and Xander was getting bored with reading about magic and not being able to try anything. Honestly, his interest had waned by the first night, but he'd kept reading cause he knew Willow would probably kill to be in his position.

The sound of a car outside attracted his attention, however, and he eagerly headed to the door to see who it was. The car was a classic, no doubt. Xander knew a bit about cars from his Uncle Rory, though Rory preferred slightly newer vehicles. This one was a thirties Rolls Royce, Xander thought, maybe even older, and probably was worth more than just about... well, anything he could think of.

It came to a stop and Xander gulped as the driver got out, towering over the vehicle as he stared, looking for all the world like Frankenstein's Monster.

"Whoa." He muttered.

The large guy walked around, opening the door for those in back, and one by one they climbed out. The woman was pretty, he figured, dressed in something that Xander just knew his mom would find outrageous, and looked like a vampire or something out of the story books. Xander thought about the fact that vampires were real and did a quickly glance upward.

'Ok, sun really IS shining... probably not a vampire.' Xander thought, frowning slightly. 'Too bad.'

A man in a suit was next, practically bouncing on his feet as he looked around and took a deep breath.

"Tish! Smell that!"

"Yes dear," The vampire lady smiled, "Sulfur and brimstone. The students here do good work."

'Ok, they're a little weird.' Xander thought, listening to the conversation as the final occupant exited the vehicle.

This one was a girl about his age or so, dressed similarly to her mother, and looking distinctly unimpressed with... well anything.

"So this is Salem," She said quietly, making Xander strain to hear her. "It looks... *nice*"

The man sighed, "Yes indeed, it's sad how far things have fallen. Why I remember grandpapa's stories about running around town, making random accusations of witchcraft, just for fun."

"Do you suppose I could find someone to burn at the stake?" the girl asked.

Xander paled slightly. 'She's kidding right?'

"Now dear, they're still a little touchy about that here," The woman said calmly. "Best you wait until you've got a few years in before you try anything as advanced as a stake burning anyway."

The girl *almost* seemed to pout, "But we did it last year at home."

"Yes, smashing time that." The man grinned, then frowned, "Too bad she got away."

"Yes, some people are rather more wiry than you expect, aren't they?" The woman said fatalistically.

'They're completely nuts.' Xander thought, stunned as the group walked towards him. ' They have to be, right'

"Look, Wednesday Darling, a playmate for you!" The woman said, drawing the girl's attention to Xander.

"He looks... bright." The girl said flatly.

Xander frowned, looking down at the Hawaiian shirt he wore, "I like bright colors, ok?"

"Excellent, my boy," The man grinned, "Nothing wrong with a good splash of color now and then, makes your enemies blink before you slide the knife in."

"Darling, manners." The woman said chidingly.

"Oh right, what WAS I thinking of," The man shook his head, promptly offering his hand to Xander. "Gomez Addams at your service. This vison of beauty next to me is my wife Mortisha..."

"Cara-mia..." The woman smiled.

"Tish... that sounded like French!" Gomez blurted before snapping his hand away from Xander, who was reaching to accept the shake, and grabbing his wife's arm and kissing it enthusiastically.

Xander's mouth gaped open as he tried to determine if he was being set up for a joke or something, but the woman just sighed with a smile and pushed her husband away.

"Later darling."

"Oh. Right, yes of course," Gomez straightened himself out and looked back to Xander, grabbing his still outstretched hand, and pumping it almost violently. "This is our daughter Wednesday, and our butler Lurch."

The big Frankenstein guy moaned, sending a shiver down Xander's back.

"Uh... Xander." He said, staring up at the big guy.

"What?" Gomez blinked, looking between Xander and Mortisha, "Was that his name, or is he speaking some other language?"

Xander shook his head, "Xander Harris, that's my name. Sorry."

"Fantastic!" Gomez cried out, "Good to know, old chum! It gets confusing when people don't know each other's names or languages."

"Uh... yeah."

"Are you here for school?" Wednesday asked suddenly, peering at him intently.

"Uh... yeah. I guess. I mean, they're not taking students here they tell me, but I'm being sent over to Hogwarts or something like that."

"Oh good show! So is little Wednesday here," Gomez grinned, "I'm sure you'll get along fabulously."

"Uh..."

"Tell me," Wednesday looked at him, "Do you know how to play ritual sacrifice?"

Xander swallowed, "Do you know how creeped out you're making me?"

"I say, man, there's no need to be rude." Gomez frowned.

"Rude? She's talking about ritual sacrifice!" Xander blurted, "I'm no expert, but most of the books I've read say that's a bad thing."

"They what!?" Gomez growled, "What kind of school IS this place? Why I have a mind to..."

"Dear..." Mortisha laid a calming hand on his shoulder, "be calm. You know that many people can't wrap their minds around how we Addams' are."

"That's no excuse!"

While Gomez raged, apparently just as passionate in anger as he was in greeting, and Mortisha worked to calm him, Wednesday moved closer to Xander.

"Do I really creep you out?"

Xander looked at her, then just nodded.

She tilted her head slightly to one side, "Is that really a bad thing?"

"I'll let you know when I figure out if you're going to try and cut my heart out with a dagger." Xander grinned in response.

She sniffed, "Certainly not. I'm saving that for my wedding night."

Xander stared, his ten year old mind trying to wrap itself around that... and failing miserably. Finally he just shook his head and lifted his hand to chest level.

"Just so you know," He said, "Creep factor just went from here..."

He moved his hand up over his head, "To here."

The girl looked at him oddly, but didn't have time to reply before Xander shoved his hands in his pocket and went on.

"But I'll be damned if I can decide if it's cause of the dagger and heart thing, or the wedding night thing."


Orientation week, as the instructors liked to call it, came and went quickly. There had been around thirty or so American, Canadian, and some Mexican students who'd shown up, each being briefed on the schools they were being sent to.

From what Xander could figure, they'd gone to a lot of trouble to make sure that each student went to a school where they at least spoke the same language. Which was good, in his opinion, to say the least. Some of the Canadians were sent to Beauxbatons in France, and a random handful from the group spoke German well enough to attend Durmstrang. The Spanish speaking were being sent to the Order of the Sun in South America.

A few others were being shipped to smaller schools, and then those like Xander himself were being sent to Hogwarts School for witchcraft and wizardry.

Hogwarts, name notwithstanding, apparently had a fair reputation in the community from what Xander could tell. He wasn't sure he liked the sound of that, cause him and school? Well, not a great mix in the past, and he saw no reason why that would change here. Still, it was all very exciting, and he found himself getting more and more eager to see the place in person.

Wednesday Addams, on the other hand, seemed terminally bored. Which didn't surprise Xander as much as it should have since she'd literally scared off every other student who showed up, and a couple of the teachers.

He'd tried to make her laugh with his patented Willow Perk-Uppers, which went down like a lead balloon. He hadn't fallen on his face that hard since he tried being friendly with Cordelia in kindergarten, yet there was still something about the girl that kept him trying.

'I'm just a glutton for punishment I guess.' He thought glumly.

Today was the big day, though. They were going to portkey across the Atlantic Ocean to Great Britain, and spend some time in a place called Diagon Alley before catching a train to Hogwarts. It was kinda scary, really, and Xander found himself chewing nervously on his lip.

"It'll be fine."

He looked to one side, the monotone voice almost but not quite startling him.

"Huh?"

Wednesday Addams looked at him for a moment, "You don't have to be scared. I've read all about portkeys, they're perfectly safe."

"Actually I was thinking about being in Britain," Xander admitted, "never thought of anything going wrong with the portkey... until now, thanks so very much."

He smirked at her, waggling his eyebrows.

Another pratfall.

He sighed slightly as her expression remained entirely unamused, the dark look she shot him probably intended to inflict bodily harm. "Sheesh, Wednesday, you need to rent a sense of humor."

"So do you."

Xander sighed again, then stopped and did a double take, glaring at her suspiciously. "Was that a joke?"

She gave him an even look, then turned away.

"It was! Short, dark, and scary made a joke!" Xander grinned, "I'm gonna get you giggling yet, girl!"

"I doubt it."

"Children! Gather round your designated areas!"

Xander filed the odd gleam in Wednesday's eyes as a potential chink in her demeanor, and vowed to make a project of exploiting and expanding that look. The two of them made their way over to the Hogwarts group and the professor who had been assigned to them.

"Alright everyone," He said, checking the old wind up timepiece on his wrist, "forty seconds, children. Everyone touch the key."

Xander looked at the beach ball everyone was grasping at and raised his eyebrow slightly, but did as he was told. The countdown started from ten, and everyone was touching it well before the key activated, and Xander again felt the tug in his guts as the world went lopsided on him.

As the world came back the children went down in a heap as one tripped and fell into another, toppling the group like dominos until only Wednesday and the Professor were left standing. The dark girl looked down at them, one eyebrow raised as Xander looked up at her.

"Is it comfortable down there?" She asked dryly.

Xander shook his head and extended his hand, "Cut out the sarcasm and help me up would ya, man I'm dizzy."

She sighed and took his head, bracing herself to help him up, but Xander just grinned and suddenly put his full weight into pulling her forward and off her feet. She toppled to the ground in a heap beside him, and looked over as he climbed to his feet and brushed himself off.

"Comfy huh?" He asked, smirking at her.

Wednesday Addams stared evenly up at the boy who'd suckered her, then calmly extended her own hand. He smirked, but perhaps surprisingly took it and lifted her to her feet.

"Of course you realize," She said, standing even with him, "This means war."

Xander felt a shiver run down his spine, but kept the grin on his face. "Whatever you say, Daffy."

Wednesday took a deep breath, her nostrils flaring slightly as she let it out through her nose, then she turned her back on Xander and rejoined the group who were now staring at the two of them with an odd mixture of fear, awe, and childish skittishness. Given that the same mix was present on the Professors face, Wednesday felt that about the only person in the entire group worth knowing was at her back.

The professor shook himself, and nodded down the street. "Alright, wands first, then familiars and school books."


Ollivander's Fine Wands was, well Xander had to say it... to himself at least, it was a hole in the wall shop. It looked like an old second hand bookstore he had been dragged to by Willow back in Sunnydale, and smelled surprisingly the same.

The old man, Ollivander, Xander presumed, was waiting for them when they came in the door and nodded to the professor.

"The little ones from America," He said more than asked. "Well, well... let's get on with it then."

He singled out the closest kid, a boy named Thomas Hardy, and within mere moments Xander found himself ducking for cover as sparks, flames, and what looked like lightning was erupting through the shop and blowing out shelves all over the place.

"Holy!" He muttered, hiding behind a corner.

Only the Professor and Wednesday Addams had remained unmoved as the experimentation went on, and for a while Xander stared at them in shock, but it slowly came to him that it wasn't as dangerous as he'd thought and he crept out to join them.

Ollivander quickly located the wand for Thomas, and moved on to another, plucking a girl named Joy from where she was hiding behind his counter. Her trials in finding a wand took a little longer, but were thankfully less spectacular. One by one the children found their wands, then Ollivander turned to Xander and frowned.

"Hmmm..." He said, checking a list. "Harris you say?"

"Uh... I didn't actually, but yeah." Xander muttered.

The old man ignored him, "try this. Holly, twelve inches, dragon heartstring core."

Xander took the wand, eyeing it for a moment, then flicked it.

He jumped as a force blew out the shelves for three rows, sending hundreds of wands flying down the aisles.

"Sorry!" he yelped.

"No matter, no matter. Here, Thirteen Inches, Vine Wood, with a Unicorn Hair core." Ollivander said absently, handing another to Xander.

Xander accepted it, swallowed, and then flicked it as he'd been told. This time there was a fizzle and pretty much nothing came out.

"Hmmm... not quite. Very well, try this..."

Xander accepted the stick from the man and flicked it, sending a shower of sparks across the room that threatened to light the place on fire. Ollivander extinguished the flames with a casual flick of his own wand and frowned deeply.

"Most troublesome."

"Uh... I can probably get by and," Xander started.

"Nonsense. No one has ever left my shop without a wand properly suited to them," Ollivander said sternly, handing him another one.

Several more times Xander practically destroyed the shop, until he was becoming as jaded about it as Ollivander seemed to be. Finally the shopkeeper pulled out a wand that had been polished to a deep reddish tint and handed it to him.

"Willow, fourteen inches, dragon heart string core." He said calmly.

Xander flicked the wand and was surprised to see a shimmering of lights come out that seemed to match what the other successful matches had been. He smiled, turning to Ollivander, but was surprised when the shopkeeper frowned.

"Not quite right." Ollivander said, looking perplexed.

"It feels good to me."

"No, there's something wrong."

"Uh... ok."

So they went through it again, and again, until everyone was quite tired of the whole thing, and still they found nothing. Ollivander sighed, shaking his head as he looked through the stores that were scattered all over the place. He finally went back to the Willow wand and drew it back out again.

"A second time," He said, handing it to Xander.

Xander frowned, but nodded and flicked the wand to the same results as before.

Ollivander looked downright put out by the results, but finally nodded, "That is the best match of any wand I have in the shop."

"We'll take it," The Professor said tiredly. "Wednesday, your turn."

"Very Well."

"Wednesday... Addams?" Ollivander looked up, his eyes widening as he visibly swallowed.

"That's correct."

For a moment Xander actually thought the old man was going to bolt or try to refuse service to the girl, but he finally shook himself loose of the effect her name had and nodded.

One wand after another left the disaster area that had been a reasonably neat shop in no less of a mess as it would have been impossible to make things worse after Xander's excursion through the wands, yet none of the sticks seemed to do well for the Addams scion.

Finally Ollivander frowned deeply and took a deep breath, drawing out a wand from the bottom tier under his counter. He handed it to Wednesday, it's black surface reflecting very little light as she accepted it.

"Ebony, eleven inches, Dragon heartstring core." Ollivander said with trepidation. "Very rare, not many wands use ebony..."

"I'll take it."

"I believe you should try it at least once, young lady," He said sternly.

"I don't need to." She told him, looking up at him. "This is my wand."


Xander had spent a great deal of his school life practicing the fine art of driving teachers to distraction, and knew the look intimately. Their chaperon of the moment had that look, in spades. He hustled them out of Ollivander's, and across to the pet shop as fast as he could, clearly trying not to look at Wednesday as the girl caressed the smooth surface of her wand with an intent look on her face.

Ollivander had the look of man due a major heart attack at any time as well, but Xander just chalked it up to a successful morning so far and eyed the pet shop with some anticipation.

He'd never been allowed a pet, though he'd always wanted one, and now he was not only getting one but he was going to be permitted to take it to CLASS with him. Magic school really had some perks.

Inside they found the place filled with animals of all types, and a few Xander had only imagined previously.

"Please, children. Owls, cats, or rats are preferred."

The children made their way through the shop, picking out the animals of their choice, but Xander found himself gravitating toward another section where a young pup was looking up at him as if expecting him to say something.

"Please Miss Addams, Owls, cats, or rats." The professor said in the background.

"I think not." Wednesday said tonelessly as she went to the counter with a raven on her shoulder. "I'll take him, please."

"Such a polite young lady," The woman behind the counter smiled, ringing it up. "And who might you be?"

"Wednesday Addams."

The woman went pale, hand shaking as she took the coins offered, and watched the young girl leave. Xander turned his attention back to the pup who was jumping up at him from inside the caged box.

He made a decision in a snap, and scooped the pup up. If Wednesday could get away with a raven, he was going to get a dog.

"Mr. Harris!"

"He's the one I want." Xander said, not giving the teacher a chance to continue. He presented himself at the counter, noticing the woman was still staring after Wednesday. "Ma'am? Ma'am, I'd like this one please."

"Huh? Oh yes, certainly." She said, numbly taking the money from him.

Xander went immediately outside to wait the rest while the frazzled professor tried to keep the rest in line. He found Wednesday waiting patiently by the curb, the large raven cawing softly on her shoulder.

"Nice." He said, nodding to the bird, "You know, everyone seems to know you."

"They know the Addams'." Wednesday corrected.

"Famous family?"

She *almost* seemed to smile for a moment, then shook her head slightly, "Infamous."

Xander frowned, thinking hard. "Isn't that the same thing?"

"Not exactly."

"Oh. Ok." Xander shrugged, holding up the puppy he'd gotten. "I gotta name him, what do you think?"

Wednesday looked over at the puppy and raised an eyebrow. "Fenrir."

"Huh?"

"Fenrir." She said with an odd twinkle. "He should get along well with Odin."

"Who's Odin?"

"This," Wednesday said, gesturing to the raven, "Is Odin."

"Ah." Xander nodded, frowning, "You're naming your bird after the Norse God?"

"You know mythology?"

"I know comic books." Xander grinned.

Wednesday sighed, rolled her eyes, and then settled in silently to wait. Xander shrugged, knowing that he'd scored another hit even if she wouldn't admit it, and settled in beside her as he held up the pup. "Fenrir, huh? That's cool. You like?"

The pup yipped once and licked his nose.


The American hoodlums had been cleared out of her shop finally, leaving the shopkeeper to sit in semi-stunned silence as her assistant came back in.

"Gee Corsa, you don't look so good."

"There's an Addams attending Hogwarts," She said as the young man went about cleaning the place up.

"A who?"

"Never mind," She sighed, "You wouldn't understand anyway. Kids these days."

"Hey! Who bought the Dire Wolf cub?"

"What?" The shopkeeper frowned, looking over.

"The dire wolf cub, he's gone, who bought him?"

A look of horror slowly passed over the shopkeeper's face as she thought desperately back. "Oh my, I don't know."


Books were next, but there were no explosions, extreme confusion, or name dropping there so things went by fairly quickly as they were all outfitted properly for school, and then were quickly shooed along by the professor escorting them.

School robes were the last stop for the day, and they each got two, though Xander scowled through the fitting constantly, hating the idea of wearing a dress to school. Only the assurance that everyone wore them made him give in finally, though he was still pretty unhappy about it.

When they were done there they were herded back to their rooms to get everything in order for the next day when they would catch the train to Hogwarts to officially begin their scholastic experience.


Platform 9 and 3/4. Xander shook his head at the silliness of it, though he had to admit that the hidden entrance was cool. Still, anyone who reads comic books like he did could figure out that it's just downright stupid to have something supposedly 'secret' this much out in the open. He watched as two people walked through the illusion, vanishing from sight, and let his eyes rove around.

'Yeah. Thought so.' He watched as two people, non-magical types he presumed, stared in shock, then quickly moved away. There was no way to hide something that blatant in a place this wide open, Xander would be surprised if it hadn't been reported to the press so many times by now that they were getting bored of it all.

Oh, sure, they'd never believe it, but still... why take stupid chances any...

Xander's eyes narrowed as he watched a man step up to the two witnesses and wave a wand at them. 'Did he just...?'

"Children... get ready now."

Xander shook his head, focusing back on the group then.

"Wait for people to look at the incoming train, then run through," The Salem Professor said, nodding to the wall.

Xander took a breath, then frowned as he saw a young boy wander right between them and the wall.

"Hold... wait for him to move on."

The boy wasn't moving though, he was looking around in confusion at the signs and finally he approached a uniformed guard. Xander sidled closer, trying to listen in.

"Pardon me, Sir, but can you direct me to platform 9 and three quarters?"

The guard looked at the boy like he was nuts, and Xander groaned. He glanced to one side, then the other, and was surprised to find Wednesday right there.

"We should prevent him from attracting any more attention," The dark girl said tonelessly, "Otherwise the guard will be obliviated, and there's no reason for it."

"Right." Xander said, moving forward as he put on a cheery smile. "Hey bro, what are you doing? Making a pest of yourself?"

The boy looked confused, but the guard just shook his head, "Here now, push off, the two of you."

"I... but..."

"Come on, bro, back to the group." Xander said, pulling the other boy along.

"Shut up." Wednesday hissed as they came along side, "The guard has no idea what you're talking about."

The boy looked almost pathetically happy to have been found by someone who did. "You... uh... are?"

"A group going to platform 9 and three quarters." Wednesday replied tonelessly.

"Good work you two," The Salem Professor smiled, "Sorry son, didn't know you were going to Hogwarts."

"That's alright Sir."

Xander found that their little group had grown by almost a full factor of two, with the addition of two red headed adults, four boys, and one girl.

"These are the Weasley's," The Professor said, "Now, shall we move through before our little group crowds out the station."

"Yes Sir."

"Alexander, Wednesday, why don't you go first with young..."

"Harry Sir." The boy answered. "Harry Potter."

"B... b... bloody hell."

Everyone turned to look at the youngest of the red headed boys, and Xander blinked to realize that they were all staring in shock. He looked over at the other boy, but didn't see anything physical that might have triggered the response. Well, not other than a scar on his forehead, so he assumed it was the name.

"Gee, I seem to be surrounded by celebrities lately," He quipped dryly, earning him an intense stare from Wednesday. Of course, since everything she did was intense, he wasn't worried about it.

"Continue it on the other side, go on! Now, no one's looking."

"You too Ron, go ahead and show them the way." The older woman said.

The youngest boy nodded and pushed a cart on ahead, heading right for the wall with Harry jogging after him. Xander matched his pace to Wednesday, who was walking with a dignified stride that nevertheless covered the ground almost as fast. The two ahead of them vanished into the stone wall, and they followed. Xander flinched hard just before walking into it, but quickly opened his eyes as bright light erupted around him and he found himself on a crowded platform with all sorts of weirdness rushing around.

"Clear the way!"

The call came from behind, causing he and Wednesday to split smoothly as the two middle redheads came roaring through, riding their carts like race cars. Behind them the rest of the group streamed after. Xander and Wednesday waited beside Harry and Ron as the others assembled.

"Are you really... Harry Potter?" Ron asked, his tone filled with awe.

"Uh, yeah I guess so." Harry seemed slightly perturbed by question.

"Brilliant!" Ron enthused, "That's fantastic! And you're going to Hogwarts, first year right?"

Harry nodded.

"Absolutely brilliant." The redhead grinned widely.

"Nice to meet you, Harry." Xander said, nodding. "I'm Xander, this is Wednesday."

"Hi," Harry said, nodding to each.

The Addams scion merely inclined her head in return.

"Those are funny names," Ron blinked.

Xander and Wednesday looked at each other, then at him, and actually spoke as one.

"Says who?"

They looked at each other sharply again, then back to Ron and Harry who were staring at them.

"Cor, do you two do that a lot? Fred and George do it all the time, but they're twins."

"Don't know, we just met." Xander grinned, looking at Harry, "So, you're famous I take it."

"Yeah, it seems so." Harry said, rubbing the back of his head self-consciously.

"Of course he is! He's Harry Pot-!" Ron blurted, only to be cut off when Harry slapped a hand over his mouth.

"Not so loud, please!" Potter begged, "I don't want to be stared at."

Ron's eyes bulged, but he nodded in agreement.

"Well, someone's learned quick how to quiet my Ron down," The older woman, presumably Ron's mother, said as she approached.

"Sorry, ma'am, but I..."

"Please, thing nothing of it." The woman said with a smile, "We all want to do that to Ron from time to time. I'm Molly Weasely."

"Hey!" Ron growled, trying to summon what dignity he could.

"Pleased to meet you ma'am." Harry said.

Molly turned to look at Wednesday and Xander, "Such quick thinking children, helping Harry out like that. And you are?"

"Xander Harris, Ma'am."

"Wednesday Addams."

Molly was nodding politely to Xander when Wednesday introduced herself, then paused, almost choking as she stared. "A... Addams you say?"

Wednesday raised a single eyebrow, but didn't repeat herself.

"Oh my. Oh my." Molly stammered, pulling back.

"Are you ok, mum?" Ron frowned.

"I... Uh, yes I'm fine. Well, have a good year Ron. Harry, it was a pleasure to meet you." Molly said, eyes never leaving Wednesday as she retreated to where he Husband was talking animatedly with the American Wizard. The children watched as she hissed something to him, his eyes bugged out, and he stared over at them. They hissed back and forth, then spoke softly to the Salem Professor, then stared some more.

"Blimey. Mum never reacted like that, even to Harry here." Ron blurted, staring at Wednesday. "Who are you?"

"I believe I already said." Wednesday said tonelessly, idly rubbing her Raven's beak as he cawed softly.

"Yeah, but I mean, I don't get it?"

"Somehow that doesn't surprise me," The dark young girl said before walking back to the American group.

Xander glanced her way, then to where Harry and Ron were standing, and made a quick decision. "I'll see you guys around school, maybe on the train."

Then he followed after her.

"Weird." Ron said, shaking his head.

Harry raised an eyebrow, looking around the platform at the various oddities he could see, then looked back at Ron.

"What?"

Harry just chuckled.


On the train the group filled up two compartments under the supervision of their Professor, who then nodded to them.

"I'll be taking my leave now. Behave yourselves."

"You're leaving us alone?"

"All children go to Hogwarts from this point on their own," He smiled. "Don't worry, you'll be fine. Just listen to the Prefects and Professors, study hard, and behave yourselves."

They nodded and watched as he left. Xander glanced over at Wednesday, who was seated by the window with the raven on her shoulder. He followed her eyes to where their professor stepped off the train and then with a jerking motion, they were moving.

"I guess it's really happening," he said, feeling a little nervous.

Wednesday just looked at him like he had said the stupidest thing imaginable, shook her head, and looked back out the window. Xander chuckled softly, "Man, it's like dealing with the Anti-Willow."

That comment earned him another sharp look, though with a hint of curiosity rather than exasperation this time. It did not, however, earn him any words. Xander took the hint and joined in a conversation going on next to him between a girl from Colorado and a boy from Texas.

Some time into the trip the door slid open to reveal a young girl with curly hair.

"Hullo," She said, looking around, "Has anyone here seen a frog?"

The kids looked at each other, then back at her and shook their heads.

"Oh drat." She muttered, "Neville lost his somewhere and can't remember where."

"Well I suppose if he could remember where it wouldn't be lost," Wednesday offered dryly.

Xander snickered, quickly looking away.

The girl looked narrowly at them both, but apparently didn't feel like responding. "Well if you do find it, could let us know? It's important, really."

"I could ask Odin to look," Wednesday offered with a gleam in her eyes, "I suspect that he's feeling a little... famished at the moment."

"Odin? Who's..." The girl trailed off, staring at the raven, and paled as she backpedaled, realizing what the 'famished' comment meant. "Urr, no that's quite alright. We'll find him our way, thank you!"

As the girl retreated, Xander sighed and turned to Wednesday, "That was mean, you know that right?"

Wednesday merely shrugged.

Xander shook his head, "I'm going to go see if I can help, I'll let her know you were joking."

"Was I?"

"That's what I'm going to tell her anyway."

"Ah," Wednesday said, tilting her head to one side as Xander left. She looked at the raven, "Odin, please, find the frog."

The bird cawed once, cocking its own head.

"No, don't eat him. Yet anyway."

The bird cawed again and fluttered off, out into the halls as Wednesday crossed her legs and produced a large leather-bound book from her luggage. Everyone in the compartment stared at her until she looked up, matching their gaze. After that, they others quickly found other things to occupy their time.

In the narrow corridors of the train Xander quickly caught up with the curly haired girl, "Hey, sorry about that. Wednesday has a strange sense of humor."

"I can tell."

"She seems alright though," Xander grinned, offering his hand. "Xander Harris."

"Hermione Granger." The girl returned, shaking his hand.

"Cool. Good to meet you, you need a hand finding that frog?"

"Thanks, that would be very nice."

They moved together through the train, poking around where a frog might hide and asking if anyone had seen it with little luck. After a bit they made their way into a nearly empty compartment.

"Excuse me, but have you two seen a frog by any chance?" Hermione asked.

"Hey!" Xander grinned, "Ron, Harry. How's the trip so far?"

"We're goof..." Ron said through mouthfuls of food.

"Snacks? How come I didn't see any snacks!?" Xander instantly complained.

"Were you blind? We past the cart three times."

"Well you had me sticking my head in any corner a frog might hide, how was I supposed to see it?"

"You can have some if you like," Harry offered, smiling.

"You sure?"

"Of course."

"Thanks... what are these anyway?" Xander asked, looking over the pile, hoping for something he recognized.

"Oh hey, are you doing magic?" Hermione focused on Ron, who had his wand out. "May I join you?"

Xander looked over from where he had half a chocolate frog in his mouth, "I tough yuf anted oo ind the rog?"

She didn't even bother looking at him, focusing instead on where Ron was tapping his pet rat with his wand and telling it something about the color yellow. "Well, that's not much of a spell, is it?"

"I'd like to see you do better!" Ron instantly challenged her.

"Well, I've only tried some small spells, but they've all worked perfectly for me," She replied, glancing over at Harry's glasses. "Like this... Oculus Reparo!"

There was a small flash and Harry's jury rigged repairs vanished from his glasses, instantly repairing the scratched lenses and cracked frame.

All three boys stared, impressed.

"That was brilliant!"

"Thank you..."

"Oh, I'm Hermione." She said, glaring at Xander, "Since someone forgot to introduce me."

"Sowwy." Xander shrugged, trying a jelly bean looking thing, then instantly gagging.

"What? What's wrong?"

"Who in the name of all that's holy would make a crazy glue flavored jelly bean!?"

"Those are berty bott's every flavored beans," Ron said, "when they say 'every'..."

"They mean *every*," Xander said, trying to spit the taste out of his mouth. "Gah!"

"I have a better question," Hermione said from where she sat, "How do you know what crazy glue tastes like? I mean, I've heard of eating glue but isn't that a little... strange?"

"What's crazy glue?" Ron asked, confused.

"Don't ask." Xander shook his head, "Let's just say it was a stupid dare, and I regretted it very, very, quickly. I had a piece of popsicle stick stuck to my tooth for three days."

Hermione smothered a laugh as Harry chuckled, but Ron just looked confused.

"What's a popsicle stick?"

Before Xander would answer the door to the compartment slid open again, this time to admit a slim blond boy and two boys that Xander instantly pegged as 'goons'.

"So," The blond announced loudly, "I hear that Harry Potter is on this train, is that true? Are you him?"

Xander glanced toward Harry, who just nodded.

"Well," The blond smiled, arms wide in greeting. "I thought I'd offer to help you out, show you how to avoid making the wrong sort of friends..."

The flick of his eyes to include the rest of the compartment left them with a good idea of who he considered the wrong sort.

"Sod off, Malfoy!" Ron growled.

"Red hair, hand me down robes... must be a Weasely." Malfoy sneered. "Really, I'm surprised any of your lot can even afford to go to Hogwarts."

Ron surged up, but Harry was already between him and Malfoy.

"I think I can tell who the wrong type of friends are on my own, Malfoy." Harry said in a low, serious tone.

The two groups glared at each other for a moment, only to be suddenly interrupted by a loud cawing sound as a black blur flew in and landed on Malfoy's head.

"What is it!? Get it off! Get it off!" The blond screamed, shocked.

Odin, easily riding out the bucking of the boy, tossed his head in the air and catapulted a frog across the room to where it landed in Xander's surprised hands. It cawed again, then cocked its head to one side and looked down at the blond head below, pecking at Malfoy three times before retreating to the frame above the door just before one of the goons pounded the slim boy over the head with a bag full of books.

Xander winced as Malfoy went down in a heap, "That had to hurt."

"Oy!" Ron roared, "Bloody brilliant! Whose bird is that?"

Xander shook his head, not answering as he looked up at the bird with a smirk on his face. "Wednesday, you ol softy."

He turned to Hermione, handing her the frog. "This belongs to your friend, I think?"

"Huh? Right..." She said, accepting it, but her focus was on Harry. "Are you really Harry Potter?"

He sighed, but nodded and pushed his hair back, showing the scar on his forehead.

"Amazing." She whispered, then smiled brilliantly, "I'm so very pleased to meet you."

"Likewise." Harry smiled.

Meanwhile, Draco Malfoy was being helped to his feet, wavering unsteadily as he glared up at the raven above him.

"Vile creature! I'll show you..." He muttered, drawing his wand.

"Don't."

The quiet voice startled them all as Draco froze, finding a wand at his throat, attached as it was to a hand and arm that had somehow snaked between his two goons. They parted instantly to reveal a small girl with a blank expression on her face as she looked at him with intense eyes.

"Who are you?"

She didn't answer, merely extended her other arm for the Raven to land on, then backed out of the compartment. Once she was clear she just turned her back on him and walked away.

"Hey! You can't just ignore me!" Draco started to charge out after her, wand in hand.

Xander cut him off, tripping him out into the hallway, leaving him sprawled up against the far wall in a heap. Then Xander stepped on the blond boy as he followed Wednesday, only glancing back to wave goodbye to the others.

"See you in school, guys."

Ron just grinned, his face threatening to split as Draco sputtered and struggled with his two friends as they 'helped' him to his feet.

"Bloody brilliant." The redhead simply said, his voice filled with awe.


"You didn't have to do that."

Xander glanced to one side, noting that Wednesday wasn't actually looking at him as she spoke, but figured it was directed his way anyway. "Do what?"

"Trip him. I could have handled it."

"I'm sure you could," Xander grinned.

"Then why help me?"

Xander shrugged, "Oddly enough, I find I kinda like you."

The dark girl looked over at Xander, eyes intensely searching his face for a moment, then she looked away and that was the end of the conversation. Xander waited for some response for a little while, then gave up on it. 'Definitely the Anti-Willow.'

He tried not to let it bother him, since he didn't really care whether she was grateful or thanked him, or even was mad at him for what he'd done. He'd heard all the responses since meeting Willow in kindergarten, from hug to slap. Being ignored was a new one, he had to admit, but what the hell, she'd had her Raven find the frog and it hadn't even eaten the little critter. Given it a heart attack, sure, but not eaten.

Similarly she'd stepped in to help Harry when he was lost, not to mention the security guy who was probably closer to some kind of magical brainwashing that Xander really wanted to think about. 'That's wrong isn't it? I mean, they just mess with people's heads? That IS wrong... I think?'

He was getting headache thinking about that, actually. He wasn't used to great moral questions and honestly didn't know the answer. All the comic books he read said that messing with people's heads was really bad stuff though, and he didn't think Professor X would condone it just cause someone saw something he probably didn't even believe.

At just barely eleven years of age, though, Xander already knew that the world was more complicated than that. He knew that drinking was bad, but his parents did it... a lot. In fact, he'd seen adults do a lot of stuff that was supposed to be pretty bad, enough that Xander wasn't really sure that his comics had been telling him the truth all along.

He sighed slightly, but said nothing else as he absently played with Fenrir while the Hogwarts Express rolled on.


The end of their journey was in the shadow of an imposing castle that brought Xander up short the second he saw it, and he wasn't the only one. Several students caused minor accidents as they stared in shock, nearly getting run over in the process. It was like something out of a fantasy movie, the good kind not the historical crap, with all the trimmings.

He was shocked out of his stupor by a rumbling voice echoing past him, "Firs' Years this way!"

He looked up, eyes widening, then looked up even further as a huge man came stomping in his direction, and Xander started looking around for escape paths just in case.

"Hagrid!"

The familiar voice of Harry Potter and the obviously eager tone calmed Xander down some, as he recognized that the other boy was certainly not afraid of the imposing figure.

"'Ello 'Arry," Hagrid beamed, and right then Xander forgot his fear. This wasn't a man who was going to hurt kids, that was pretty obvious.

Xander moved forward, nodding to Harry, "Hey dude, who's your friend?"

"Dude?" Ron blinked, looking around, "Who's dude?"

Hermione sighed, rolling her eyes, but Harry just grinned, "Xander, this is Hagrid. Hagrid, these are my friends, Xander, Hermione, and Ron."

"Ello everyone, are you ready to go to Hogwarts then?" Hagrid beamed.

They all nodded as the first years slowly gathered around, and were shown to a series of boats that would apparently be taking them across the lake to the castle. With the usual amount of trouble that came with guiding children, Hagrid got his charges where he needed them to go and within just a few minutes was hustling them into the school.

They were standing there, waiting for this 'sorting' ceremony everyone kept talking about, and generally getting impatient, antsy, and nervous in the process when someone screamed, several other's gasped, and Xander turned to find his eyes widening at the sight of several ghosts floating through the far wall, apparently discussing giving someone, or something, a second chance.

The ghosts seemed to notice that they were being watched and paused in front of the assembled students.

"Ah, first years I suppose?"

"Yes Sir."

Everyone, Xander included, turned and gaped at how calmly Wednesday was as the ghosts looked at her.

"About to be sorted?"

"I believe so."

"Good, good," The ghost, who looked like a friar nodded, "Hope to see you in Hufflepuff, young lady. That was my old house you know."

Wednesday didn't change her expression as she gazed up at him, "That's unlikely, Sir."

"Oh?" The Ghost grinned widely, "And why do you say that?"

"I've read the requirements, I don't believe I will be placed there."

"And where you do you expect to be placed?"

The girl shrugged very slightly, "Not Gryffindor either, I expect. So Ravenclaw or Slytherin is my best guess."

The ghosts looked at each other, exchanging more in the glances than anyone could see, then the friar turned back. "I expect we'll find out how right you are shortly, young lady."

The Friar looked back to the others and nodded, "We'll be seeing you around."

As the ghosts floated off Xander noticed everyone shifting away from Wednesday and made a point to move a little closer. "You sure know how to get some extra elbow room."

"I was feeling a little crowded," She deadpanned in response.

"This way children, form a line," A Professor introduced as McGonagall said sternly, appearing practically from nowhere, hustling them into the Great Hall.

As everyone was oohing and aweing at the fantastic night sky above them, Xander heard Hermione speak up.

"It's not real, you know."

"Huh?" Harry blinked, looking at her.

"It's enchanted to look like the sky," She proclaimed, obviously eager to doll out the tidbit of knowledge. Xander almost chuckled at the satisfied look, bordering on true smugness, that crossed her face.

"How do you know that?" Ron practically demanded, his voice just short of an actual challenge.

"I read all about it in Hogwarts, A History."

"Ah," Xander sighed happily, "There's my fix of Willowy goodness. Been missing that."

Harry, Ron, and Hermione looked over at him, obviously confused.

"Nevermind," Xander said, just smiling easily.

"Right." Ron shook his head.

The redhead was about to say something else, but was interrupted when the Professor brought out an old hat and set it on a chair. They looked on in confusion, and almost everyone jumped as the hat began to SING.

Oh, you may not think I'm pretty,

But don't judge on what you see,

I'll eat myself if you can find

A smarter hat than me.

You can keep your bowlers black,

Your top hats sleek and tall,

For I'm the Hogwarts Sorting Hat

And I can top them all.

There's nothing hidden in your head

The Sorting Hat can't see,

So try me on and I will tell you

Where you ought to be.

You might belong in Gryffindor,

Where dwell the brave at heart,

Their daring, nerve and chivalry

Set Gryffindors apart;

You might belong in Hufflepuff,

Where they are just and loyal,

Those patient Hufflepuffs are true

And unafraid of toil;

Or yet in wise old Ravenclaw,

If you've a steady mind,

Where those of wit and learning,

Will always find their kind;

Or perhaps in Slytherin

You'll make your real friends,

Those cunning folk use any means

To achieve their ends.

So put me on! Don't be afraid!

And don't get in a flap!

You're in safe hands (though I have none)

For I'm a Thinking Cap!

Some of the kids hesitantly applauded when it finished, then the professor began calling out names, starting with.

"Addams, Wednesday!"

Xander watched as the dark girl stepped calmly forward and had the hat placed in her head. He seemed to consider for a long time, then finally let out a call.

"Ravenclaw!"

Wednesday set the hat aside and glanced down at the table of her house, then back at Xander for a moment. Finally she nodded to him and walked calmly to the applauding students. Xander clapped too, but he was more interested in the look on the Professor's face as she watched Wednesday nervously the whole time.

One kid after another was called up, then dispatched quickly to one house or another, then after some time it the call was...

"Harris, Alexander!"

Xander swallowed and walked up to the seat, knowing by this point that he just had to put the hat on, so he did. As soon as it was down over his head it began to mumble.

"Hmm... interesting. Very interesting, boy. You're one of the tougher ones to place, I'd say. You've got heart, loyal to a fault. The Hufflepuffs would gladly have you, no question. There's courage here too, though your chivalry is a little rusty..." The hat chuckled at its own joke, just confusing Xander, "Your courage isn't blind, but it's more than enough to stand up to the requirements of a Gryffindor. The best I can say for your mind is that you might survive in Ravenclaw, though I expect you'd wish you hadn't. Still... The only answer I can see is..."

"Slytherin!" The hat yelled out after its long deliberation, and Xander rose up.

He looked around then found the table with green colors and made his way over to it. Some of the table applauded, some were more stoic. Xander suddenly had a bad feeling in his gut as he looked at the adult standing behind the table, glaring at him as he approached.

'Oh man. This is gonna SUCK.' He suddenly realized, having an urge then to turn and rush back, demanding another try with the hat.

Instead he just sat down and tried to make himself invisible as the sorting continued. His sinking feeling continued when the Blond kid he'd tripped on the train was sent instantly over to the Slytherin table, along with his two goons. School was looking to be about as good as it ever did he realized with a sigh, only half paying attention to the sorting until Harry was at the chair with the hat on his head.

There was another long pause as the hat considered, apparently having the same problems with Harry as he had with Xander. Finally, though, the hat let out a roar of "Gryffindor!"

The Red and Gold table erupted then, with kids cheering and yelling 'We got Potter! We Got Potter!'. Xander winced, and could hear the grumbling around his table. 'Harry's got some fans at least.'

Ron and Hermione were also in Gryffindor Xander noted when it was all done, and he found himself sitting across the room from pretty much everyone he personally knew, and beside at least one person he'd found reason to dislike. 'Oh joyous day.'

When the sorting was done the oldest man Xander had ever seen just clapped his hands and suddenly the tables were covered in foods of types Xander had only imagined, and he actually stared for several long moments as everyone else tucked in and began to eat.

He shook it off quickly, grabbing some food of his own, and was well into his meal when a ghostly figure floated into view, apparently sizing up the Slytherin first years. Everyone shied away from him, but Xander had seen Wednesday speak to them earlier and just nodded to the rather gory spectacle as it passed by.

"Hey man, how's it going?"

The ghost paused to look at him closely, leaning in as the two students on either side of Xander shifted away in a hurry. Xander leaned back, frowning, "Uh. No offense, but I'm eating here dude, and the Baron Harkonnen look is kinda freak worthy."

The growl the ghost let out sent a shiver down his back, but Xander stubbornly refused to back down and finally the ghost moved on.

"Doesn't talk much, does he?"

"That was the Bloody Baron!" A student next to him hissed, "No one talks back to the Baron, he's just here to look intimidating."

Xander glanced around and noticed that the other tables all had ghosts floating around them and they seemed to be involved in conversation. He filed the information away and just shrugged, "If he doesn't want me to talk to him, he can tell me himself."

The boy looked at him like he was nuts, but Xander had long since determined that he was in a completely different world and the worst thing he could do right now is look like a pushover. He glanced longingly over at the Ravenclaw table, only to find Wednesday looking back at him, her own position just as isolated as his was. At the Gryffindor table, things were different. Harry and Ron were talking and laughing, and the group was generally enjoying themselves as everyone wrapped up their meal.

As the dishes vanished to wherever they were sent, and Xander made a silent plea to whatever Gods were watching that he wouldn't have to wash the damn things, the oldest guy on the planet stood up and cleared his throat.

Xander listened half-heartedly as he went on with the standard sounding rules that he'd expect, stay out of the forest, behave, yadda, yadda, yadda. When the mention of 'painful death' came up Xander stiffened to attention, focusing on the old man. 'What was that? Third floor?'

While he was still trying to figure it out, however, the Headmaster had moved on.

"And now, before we go to bed, let's all sing the school song!"

Xander frowned, watching as the Headmaster tapped his wand and shot out a ribbon that formed into words.

"Everyone pick your favorite tune!"

Xander found himself compelled to sing along as the whole school roared, the words spilling from him on automatic as his eyes flicked about. Everyone was singing, and not one was using the same tune as far as he could tell. The result was a deafening roar that slowly began to peter out as the faster tunes finished.

Finally it was just two Gryffindor twins, Xander recognized as Ron's brothers, singing in a slow funeral march tune. When they finished people applauded, the Headmaster loudest of all.

"Ah music," Dumbledore said, wiping his eyes. "Truly, a magic beyond what we do here."

Xander was ignoring him mostly, eyes on the twins as a smiled played around his lips. Those two were gonna be fun, he was willing to bet.

"Alright, off to bed with you."


He was led to the Slytherin rooms by the Prefects, two tall seventh year students who looked rather dark and dreary in his opinion. They stopped at a painting of a pinch faced woman in English riding gear, staring haughtily out at them as she demanded, "Password?"

"Draconic Fury."

The portrait swing open and Xander and the others got their first view of the Slytherin Common room. It was large, with two fireplaces providing head. Green tapestries covered the walls, and Xander had to admit that the place looked pretty comfortable. Despite the heat from the fireplaces, though, it felt cold as he moved through it. There was just something, cool about the room. Not cool in the good way either, but Xander couldn't decide if it was in a bad way so he let it go.

"Well, well," A sneering voice surprised him, making his turn around to see the boy he'd tripped standing behind him. "Look what we have here."

Xander's heart slammed in his chest, and his stomach tied up in knots. He knew that there was no way he could take the three of them, and those two goons seemed glued to blondie's sides. He sighed, "Draco, right? We have a problem, I suppose?"

"That's Draco *Malfoy* to you," The boy sneered, "And I don't have any problems, but you do. You helped that Gryffindor scum earlier."

"No, I kept you from going after Wednesday Addams, who is in Ravenclaw." Xander corrected, trying not to let his voice pitch upwards from fear. "She is a friend, and I don't know you."

"You should have stayed out of it!" Malfoy snapped, stepping closer.

"You should keep your temper under control," Xander countered, "From what I read, jumping into fights without looking is a *Gryffindor* trait, isn't it?"

Malfoy jerked back like he'd been slapped, frowning as he eyed Xander coldly for a moment. Finally he shrugged, "Fine. I'll give you another chance."

Xander just barely kept from rolling his eyes at the snotty generosity he was being offered. Out loud he just nodded, "Thank you, I'll give you one too."

Then he turned and walked away from the boy, who was tilting between turning purple and blue, apparently too incensed to respond. That was fine with Xander and he joined the group that was being shown to their rooms.

The rooms were in a sub-floor below the common room, no windows, but well-appointed enough to be comfortable just the same. Green seemed to be the color of the day, with white and silver as the preferred accents. Xander tested his bed and found it was more than he was used to, and he had a little hope that maybe... just maybe it wasn't going to suck as much as he thought it was.

He laid down, honestly dog tired, and closed his eyes. In short order he found himself fighting desperately to ward off the wave of homesickness that washed over him as he thought of Willow and Jesse, back home in Sunnydale.


Classes started off quickly the next morning, with some seriously interesting subjects from Xander's point of view. Charms, Transfigurations, it was all high grade superhero stuff in his mind and for once he was actually cracking the books.

A lot of the novelty wore off pretty quick once he realized that the stuff they were teaching amounted to little more than children's games, and could be done by most stage magicians. Of course stage magicians did it by sleight of hand and trickery, Xander supposed, at least that's what they said.

It did make him wonder.

Charms was pretty interesting, even if the guy who taught it put him in mind of a teacher he'd once had called Snyder. Ok, Flitwick was nicer, and probably a lot better looking, but still the resemblance was there. Still, the Prof aside, charms was cool cause it basically let someone put all kinds of spells on normal objects, letting them do some cool things. Xander could already see some interesting possibilities there, but he was going to need to get ahold of his comic collection in order to review and consider them.

The problem was, however, that it was damned HARD to make them stupid things work.

Swish and flick. Right. Xander was only eleven years old, but he could make SO many off color jokes about swish and flick that he was really happy no one back home could see him trying to do simple charms right now. The ability to completely unchange anything to do with the object would NOT make up for the humiliation he'd get from Larry, or the sneers from Cordy.

Still, if he could pull it off, well... It had possibilities to be sure.

Transfigurations was something else that was kinda cool, though it interested him slightly less. Changing one thing into another was good in a pinch, but honestly if he wanted a flower he could go pick one, he didn't have to turn a piece of paper into it. Certainly he couldn't think of any good reason to turn a match into a needle, not that he was ABLE to turn a match into a needle, but the point was still there.

The week progressed much like that, and Xander was pretty relieved to find that no one seemed to have a huge lead on him or anyone else. Hermione was, pretty clearly, a Willow-smart witch, and she was going to build a lead on him to be sure, but for the moment just about everyone was within sight of his own starting position.

Many of his classes were conducted with Gryffindor, interestingly enough, since most of Slytherin seemed to despise the 'kitty cats', and it was pretty clear that the cats didn't much care for the snakes. That made those classes the next thing to unbearable if one was stupid enough to be caught between the active combatants in the two sided turf war.

Xander made it a point not to sit anywhere near Draco and his Cronies, or the 'Potter Crew'.

After classes, though, was when things got pretty bad. Slytherin was a house divided, and Xander wondered if it was the same in the others. To the outside, Slytherin stood fairly tightly united it was true, but Xander thought that was because most of the school seemed to hate them and that made them tighten ranks.

From the inside, though, it was clear that there were schisms so deep someone could fall into them and be lost forever.

Xander nearly did just that on his second day.


"Mudblood scum..."

Xander didn't know what the first word meant, but the second word and tone filled it in nicely as he stepped up into the Slytherin common room and found himself once again staring at Draco and his goon squad, this time bullying a Slytherin boy.

"I don't know HOW you could possibly have been sorted into this house," Draco sneered as the boy crawled back, bleeding from his nose as the Draco and the two larger boys loomed over him.

"Probably cause the hat put him here," Xander said sarcastically from where he was leaning on a door frame.

Draco spun on him, eyes widening, "Stay out of this!"

"You've had your fun, leave him alone." Xander said, again fighting the urge to shake as he always did when dealing with kids who could beat him to a pulp. "What'd he do anyway?"

"He was in my way," Draco smirked.

"Next time you'll probably have less trouble if you ask him to move," Xander noted, surprised by his own calm.

Draco and the other two turned on him, leaving the other boy alone. "I see you didn't take my advice to heart. Standing up for this sort of scum is a sure way to take his place."

"Yeah well, I've done that before," Xander muttered under his breath.

Of course, he didn't even *know* the other kid, and that was a bit unusual. Normally he wouldn't put himself in this position for just anyone. Getting the crap beat out of him for a stranger was gonna suck.

There was no changing Draco's focus now, though, and Xander tensed as the two monoliths moved to flank him.

"Alright! That's enough!" The four of them jumped as the Slytherin Prefect moved in, breaking up the conflict with a glare in Xander's direction. "We don't fight each other."

"Tell that to Drac and his goon squad," Xander retorted.

"You don't know how things work here, so I'm going to let that go," The older boy growled, "But we are Slytherin, no one else gives a damn about us, so we sure as hell don't fight each other."

Xander glanced pointedly over at the boy Draco had been bullying, who was getting to his feet and wiping his nose clean.

"If he wants to survive here, he'll toughen up fast."

That was the only answer he got out it.


As rough as it was for him, Xander didn't see where it was much better for Wednesday. He didn't have many classes with the Ravenclaw's, so he didn't have a clue how she was doing there, but whenever he saw her around she seemed as alone as he was.

He made a point of checking up with her every day, at least once or twice, but didn't really get much information from her when he did. Still, she didn't ignore him entirely as she did pretty much everyone other than professors, and they soon were to be found sitting near one another when they had time. By the third day, ironically Wednesday, Xander was talking to her about his experiences in class and out.

On Thursday, she finally said something back.

He was talking about the fractions he'd seen in his own house, and the level of crap Draco and a few others put out when she looked over at him and simply said, "Why don't you put a stop to it?"

Xander looked at her sharply, "Have you seen the two gargoyles he has with him? Even if Drac was the kinda guy who could take a hint, he won't with those two bookends. I'm starting to think I should have stayed home. School wasn't always easy there, but at least I didn't have to worry about being killed in my sleep."

Wednesday shrugged, "It seems to me that he's not being very Slytherin."

"Yeah, you get that too?" Xander frowned, thinking to what he'd read, "There's not very many that are, you know. Is it the same in your house?"

"No. Everyone is very interested in learning," She said in response, "At least..."

"What?"

"They're close minded," Wednesday said, almost sighing. "They want to learn from books and teachers, but they don't want to know about anything that doesn't fit into their nice little box shaped world."

Xander found himself staring, impressed that she could string that many words together in one go. He considered her words, though, thinking about it, "I wonder about the other houses."

"Why?"

"Just curious mostly. You say that your house has some really intelligent stupid people, I know that my house seems to be heavy on the ruthless ambition, really light on the cunning. Wonder what the other two are like?"

Wednesday shrugged, "Probably the same, in different ways."

Xander chuckled, nodding. "Yeah."

He sighed, shaking his head. "Alright. Fine. I'm Slytherin, whatever the hell that means. I guess I better learn to act like it."

Wednesday looked over at him, raising a single elegant eyebrow, "Oh?"

"Don't worry," Xander smirked, "I'm not going to go overboard on the ruthless ambition, but a little cunning seems to be in order."

"Indeed." Wednesday said softly.

"And from the sounds of it, you may need to start teaching the Ravenclaws a few lessons too," He suggested.

Wednesday considered that. Honestly she didn't care what they thought, or didn't think, about her. She was here for her own advancement, not theirs. Still, she was growing bored with their attitudes, and the lessons were mindlessly simple enough to leave her with too much free time, so... perhaps a few games were in order.

"Perhaps you are right," She said.

Xander smirked, "I know I am. Now, let me know if you need any help."

She nodded to him, "And you do the same."


Friday brought Double Potions with Gryffindor House, which really didn't seem to be a good thing from what Xander could tell. Half the other kids around him wanted to strangle the Gryffs, and the other half seemed to be afraid of them to one degree or another. Malfoy was leading the first group, of course, and he seemed particularly eager to get to class.

Xander figured out why pretty quickly when the Professor turned out to be the head of Slytherin House, the sallow faced man who'd watched the sorting ritual with an impassive glare the day before. He opened his lecture with a long spiel on bottling fame and putting a stopper in death, most of which flew right over Xander's head, then turned almost immediately on Harry with a sneer that only seemed to get worse as the seconds ticked by.

The Slytherins who'd surrounded Malfoy seemed amused by it, snickering softly as Potter was put on the spot, and Xander was pretty happy with his position suddenly. He didn't think he'd stand a chance in hell of passing this course if he had to deal with that level of contempt.

He was watching Draco, though, and mentally making notes.

From what he could tell Harry was a pretty famous guy, and that was both good and bad. It had taken him only a little time to get the story from someone. Having his parents killed off had to suck, no doubt. Xander's mom and dad were pains sometimes, but living without them? Xander couldn't imagine it. They were his mom and dad.

It was also pretty obvious that Harry was above average in classes, though for the moment that didn't mean much of anything. As far as Xander could tell, though, the other boy had done nothing to earn the intense level of dislike from Draco.

Or Snape, for that matter, Xander noted as Snape continued to rip into Harry with question after question that he knew that HE couldn't answer. That went on until another Gryff, Xander thought was Neville, suddenly started breaking out in the worst acne Xander had seen since Jessie's older brother turned fifteen. His attention diverted, Snape tore into Neville for a bit until finally settling down to teach the class.

Lots of stuff just didn't add up, and Xander would be damned if he could figure it out. He'd run it by Wednesday later, for now he had to figure out how he was supposed to brew this gunk without winding up looking like Neville.


Information gathering was slow, Xander found out over the week. There were so many things under the surface that he didn't know about. Wednesday had come through, telling him quietly that Draco's old man had been some kind of cultist back in the day, and the dimwit who got himself killed by a kid was the top dog of the group.

Which explained some things a bit, anyway. Harry supposedly offs the head dork, so all the lesser twits are left out to dry. Probably a lot of grudges there, even if it was pretty stupid to blame a kid for something like that. Xander wondered for a bit how Wednesday had found out, but decided he probably didn't want to know.

What he didn't know wouldn't get him expelled. He hoped.

Flight lessons were up next, and Xander had to admit... flying? Now that was major league cool.

They'd all turned out on the grounds, with brooms of all things being passed out, and the professor looking very sternly at each of them.

"Alright, put your hand over your brooms and say 'up!'"

Xander frowned, doing as he was told. The broom shivered a bit, but that was it. It wasn't the worst result in the class, not by a long shot, but Draco and Harry got theirs into their hands on the first try. Xander scowled at the broom, "UP!"

The broom broke loose of the ground, missing his outstretched hand, and smacked him right in the face. Xander flopped back, hitting the ground with an expellation of air, and stared up as the broom floated above him for a few seconds, then dropped back onto his face for a second shot at him.

Both houses were laughing to varying degrees as the professor rushed over.

"Are you alright?"

Xander didn't answer as he glared at his broom, "Of course, you realize, this means war."

"Are you alright?"

"I'm fine, Ma'am," Xander sighed, getting to his feet. "Just caught me by surprise that's all..."

A scream startled Xander and the professor, and they both turned to see Neville rocket into the air like he was heading for orbit, his broom wildly yanking him along for the ride of his life. Hopefully not the LAST ride of his life. The professor, Madam Hooch went running after him, screaming at him to calm down until his ride ended with a crashing thud into the ground.

Xander winced when they were told he'd broken his wrist, and were ordered to stay on the ground or be expelled.

No problem. He glared at his broom, entirely unwilling to give the damned thing another chance to off him.

"Give it back, Malfoy!"

Xander turned to see Malfoy playing keep away with something golden and frowned. 'God, does this guy have to cause trouble at every opportunity?'

He moved closer, unsure what to do, only to have the point rendered moot when Malfoy grabbed his broom and flashed into the air, challenging Harry to chase him. The look on his face when Potter did just that was amusing, but now Xander found himself looking around to see if the professor was anywhere in sight, and wondering how in the hell he could keep them from getting expelled if she came back early.

Again, however, he didn't have time to do anything as the duo took their dogfight on the road, so to speak, and dueled through the air over the school in what had to be one of the coolest games of tag Xander'd ever seen.

It ended when Malfoy tossed the object away, Harry dove after it, caught it after a death defying brush with the ground, and was caught by his own head of house.

'Yeah. I see why he was sent to the Gryffs.' Xander thought, shaking his head. 'Being gutsy is one thing, but I don't care what the hell Malfoy stole, it wasn't worth getting killed OR expelled over. That was just reckless, not brave.'


Of course being reckless sometimes paid off as Xander found out a couple days later. Malfoy was fuming so hard Xander half expected him to spontaneously combust, and Harry was the reason why. Not only had he somehow survived Malfoy's various schemes, but he was apparently now playing in the school teams for some kind of sport Xander had never heard of.

It was amusing and all, but honestly Xander didn't have time to pay any attention to it.

Classes were getting harder, and the life in the Slytherin dorms was getting tenser.

There were two distinct factions, Xander had learned, mostly being defined by the second years and older. The pure bloods, as they called themselves, were the first and strongest. They were probably about three quarters of the house, and basically lorded it over everyone else. Malfoy, though a first year, was solidly in their camp and even fairly high up in the actual ranks as far as Xander could tell.

His family name had some serious clout, otherwise the various humiliations he'd already endured would have done some more damage to his influence.

The other group was, well, everyone else.

'Muggle-born', 'Half Bloods', and a couple 'Pure Bloods' who'd made a stand. There were also several students of varying years that were pretty clearly neutral. They were all pure bloods as far as Xander could tell, the only classification that *could* be neutral. Xander himself was a bit of an odd duck, he found.

He didn't talk about his family, and he sure as hell wasn't going to start now, so no one was sure where he belonged. His being a 'Colonial' both reduced and protected his status. On the one hand, he was a barbarian from the states, but on the other they had no way to check on his parentage or bloodlines. It gave him a certain degree of latitude that many others weren't afforded, but it was pretty clear that he *wasn't* going to be joining the pure blood group anytime in the near future.

All things considered, Xander figured his best bet was keep his head down, don't cause waves, and hopefully go to Salem Academy in the next year.


They finally got a chance at some cool stuff in Charms class, when Professor Flitwick told them that they were ready to start making things fly. Of course, start was the key word. Xander found himself muttering the Wingardium Leviosa spell over and over again, to varying results. The only one of which that resembled 'flight' was when his feather exploded in a fiery rain of death and destruction that sent a plume of smoke three feet into the air over his head.

Actually, it was pretty cool for all that.

Xander was quickly distracted, like most of the rest of the class, by the Gryffindor side of the table where Ron Weasley was complaining about the impossibility of the task. Hermione almost instantly jumped on his case, her tone making Xander smile subconsciously as he clearly heard her correcting the red head.

"You're saying it wrong," She told him, her voice travelling clearly across the entire room. "It's Wing Gar Dium Levio Sa."

Xander only winced slightly as he saw Ron redden, instantly recognizing that the boy had a fair bit too much pride for his own good. Jessie did the same thing when Willow first tried correcting him, and it had taken a lot of work to keep the two from killing each other at first.

"If you're so good, you do it then!" Ron challenged her.

Xander shook his head, now wincing for real as he actually smiled.

"What are you smirking at, Harris?"

Xander looked over at Malfoy, then nodded to the Gryffs, "Ronny boy over there just walked right into a wall. Watch."

Malfoy looked over as Hermione did a perfect swish and flick, clearly incanting the charm, and rose her feather with near perfect control.

"Five bucks says Ronny turns red enough to hide in front of one of Gryffindor's tapestries." Xander said, chuckling.

Malfoy found himself snickering slightly at the other boy's obvious discomfort, then spoke up loud enough for the class to hear, "Good lord, Weasely, can't you even get a simple charm right?"

Xander grimaced, knowing damn well that Malfoy hadn't done one yet himself, and yanked the blond back into his seat as Ron and Harry glared over at him.

"Take your hands off me you... you... *American*." Draco hissed.

"Don't be an idiot. What are you going to do if Ron challenges you to do better? Do you think you can cast better than her?" Xander hissed right back, "Cause I've known a girl just like that, and I'll bet anything you like that she can out cast you on anything in the books."

Draco stiffened, "That little mudblood? I'm far more powerful..."

"Maybe, but my money says she's smarter. That's not an insult, by the way," Xander said, sitting back and trying to look normal. "She's way smarter than me, and I know it. From what she said on the train she's not from a magical family, so you probably know more stuff... but what she's got in her books? Trust me, don't challenge her on it. That's her own territory."

Draco glared at him, but by then the class had settled down and moved on. Xander honestly didn't know how the hell half the people in his House had gotten there. They were obviously NOT the cunning type and, the more he watched them, the more it was clear they weren't even the ambitious or even ruthless types either. Oh, there was no doubt that most of them could be as brutal as all get out, but there was a certain level of... finesse assumed when you talked about being 'ruthless', and finesse was NOT the forte of any of the students he'd met so far.

Malfoy was obviously one of the top dogs, even though he was a 'firstie' like Xander. His family name had some power, and he obviously swung a lot of clout around with his dad's money bags. The two knuckle draggers that followed him around were proof of that. Pansy Parkinson had ambition, the way she tried sucking up to Draco made that clear, but the girl scored zero points of finesse and that was being polite.

It was a lot like watching Cordelia and her sheep squad back home, really. Draco was the closest Xander could identify to an actual Slytherin by the qualities he'd read, but he was obviously either too stupid or too ignorant of how the world worked to make use of his advantages. Even at eleven years old Xander knew that there was simply no reason to court as much disfavor as Draco did, no matter how much money you had. It was like the boy was actively TRYING to get three quarters of the school angry with him.

Most of the rest were worse than that, and that was being polite about things. There were a few, of course, that Xander couldn't really put a read on. Daphne Greengrass, for one. She was pretty standoffish so far, and didn't go out of her way to attract any attention. The quiet ones were the ones to worry about, Xander decided. At least in the long term, Draco was likely to be a short term pain in the ass.

Charms class broke up, interrupting Xander's thoughts, and leaving with another exploded feather and a couple disgruntled housemates shooting glares in his direction. He sighed and shrugged it off, stopping short though when they stepped out of the class room.

"It's no wonder no one can stand her," Ron was saying, grumbling as he spoke, his words easily audible to everyone in the hall. "She's a nightmare, really."

Hermione Granger stifled a sob and pushed quickly past them, bolting down the hall. Xander shook his head and walked up behind the duo as Harry looked over at Ron.

"I think she heard you."

"No duh." Xander said clearly, slapping Ron in the back of the head.

"Oi!" The Gryffindor yelped, twisting around as he held his head.

"If you're going to be a sneak and talk behind someone's back," Xander said sarcastically, "Try and have the *cunning* to make sure they're not standing behind YOUR back at the time."

The Slytherins behind Xander laughed openly as Xander paused and looked at Harry. "Well?"

"Well what? I didn't say anything!" Harry said defensively.

Xander rolled his eyes, "Fine. I'll do it."

Before either Harry, or the rapidly reddening Ron Weasley could say anything else Xander had pushed through and headed after Hermione.

The two looked at each other, "What was that about?"

"He's totally barmy." Ron shrugged, "Total nutter."

"You two are useless tools," Daphne Greengrass said, rolling her eyes as she walked past.

"Hey!" Ron objected loudly.

"What did I do!?" Harry asked, his tone plaintive.

The blond shook her head and walked regally past, "If you can't figure it out, I'm certainly not going to tell you."

"Nutters." Ron said, shaking his head, "They're all nutters."

Draco chuckled nastily as he walked past, "My, My Potter, you're certainly scoring all kinds of points today aren't you?"

Harry and Ron glared at Draco as he walked past, and they both heard him as he chuckled and went on.

"Maybe Harris isn't such a waste, he seems to know how to put Weasley in his place at least."

Ron started to turn an alarming puce color, causing Harry to grab his arm, "Come on, it's time for lunch."

"Right, mate. Lunch."


Xander sighed, frustrated by the castle he was wandering through. He was missing a class, trying to find a crying girl he barely knew, and the damn place kept changing shape. He was about to give up when a ghost floated past.

"Hey! Spooky!"

The shimmering figure paused, looking back at him, then back down the hall.

"Pardon?" The floating figure asked quizzically. "Are you speaking to me?"

"Yeah, have you seen a crying girl come through here?"

The figure didn't answer him for a moment, looking Xander over. "You're Slytherin."

"Duh." Xander muttered, "Look, pal, I'm trying to find a girl who ran through here some time ago."

"But you're a Slytherin."

Xander frowned, "What's that got to do with anything?"

"Slytherin's don't talk to me, I'm the Gryffindor Ghost."

"What? What kind of stupid rule is that?"

The ghost looked taken aback for a moment, then blinked, "Well I suppose it's not a *rule* per say, but it's just not done."

Xander sighed, "Look, did you see her or not?"

"Well, yes, actually." The ghost said, "But she's Gryffindor too."

"So? She's *crying* dude!"

The Ghost looked truly perplexed, head cocked to look at Xander closely. "Are you SURE you're Slytherin?"

Xander growled and stomped forward, actually passing right through the ghost and continuing down the hall. "Stupid effin ghosts... Dumbass Gryffindor ghosts... stupid house bullsh-"

The Ghost known as Nearly Headless Nick watched the young Slytherin stomp off and bemusedly shook his head, causing it to wobble slightly. "Well he certainly has the Slytherin grumpiness down..."

Nick turned after a moment and followed, curious and slightly concerned as well, but remained far enough back to be out of sight.


The first clue Xander really got to Hermione's location was a small gaggle of girls walking through the hall ahead of him, whispering loudly and gasping.

"Hey!"

The girls, who were wearing Hufflepuff colors, shrieked in surprise as he approached, then got ahold of themselves and eyed him warily.

"What?"

"Did you see Hermione come through here?"

The girls looked at each other, then back at him, "Why would you want to know where a Gryffindor is?"

Xander rolled his eyes, "I just do, ok?"

They eyed him darkly, "Well we never saw her."

The three stuck their noses up and walk passed him, leaving Xander completely confused as to what just happened. He shook his head, and thought about it. The last time he'd had to go looking for Willow after Cordelia had ripped into her he'd gotten the same reaction from another group of girls who'd blamed him for making Willow cry.

Since he was a Slytherin 'asshole', that was probably the case here too. Xander sighed, shaking his head.

'Ok... Hermione is like a Willow clone, right? Where would Will go?' Xander pondered, frowning.

Well, the library came to mind, but actually that wasn't likely. Willow loved the library, but she never went there when she was sad. Ok, what else? Xander grimaced, remembering that he'd had to pull Willow out of the girls bathroom the last time, and had caught a lot of heat for it.

He sighed, steeling himself, and started looking for the closest girl's washrooms.


Nick watched idly as the young Slytherin found the lavatory the girl was hiding in and pounded on the door, calling out as soft as he could while still hoping to be heard on the other side. Oddly enough the boy seemed to actually be trying to comfort the Gryffindor girl. It was rather perplexing, actually. Nick tried to think of the last time a Slytherin had acted quite like this, and had to think back more than a few years. Before Grindlewald, actually.

Of course, back then, Slytherins didn't have quite as bad a reputation as they had garnered lately. Oh, they weren't universally loved, to be sure, but they were respected at least as much as feared. It was really quite interesting, the old Gryffindor spirit mused.

He really would have to speak with the Baron about it.


"Hermione?" Xander hissed, far louder than he wanted as he pounded on the door. "Are you in there?"

With no answer forthcoming, he steeled himself and pounded again. "Is anyone there? I'm coming in!"

"Go away!"

Xander sighed, relaxing slightly as he recognized the voice as belonging to the genius of Gryffindor House. "Come on, Hermione. The carrot top didn't mean what he was spouting, he was just trying to save face."

"I said go away!"

"Damn it." Xander groaned, "I hate this part."

He was about to open the door when a lumbering sound caught his attention and he half turned to look down the hall. His eyes grew wide as he watched the HUGE figure moving in his direction and he yelped, throwing the door open quickly and then slamming it behind him as he braced his back against the door.

"You can't come in here!" Hermione shrieked, "This is the GIRL'S Lavatory!"

"I really hope that HE knows that!" Xander snapped back.

"He?" The girl frowned, confused. "He who?"

Before Xander could answer the door shook behind him, throwing him clear across the room into a skid that finished him with lying at the floor by Hermione's feet, one hand scrambling to draw his wand as the other pointed. "He, Him, Who, Him, Him!"

Hermione's stared down at Xander, face confused, but then she looked up as the door shuddered again and cracked opened, revealing a huge troll as it bent over and entered the room. Hermione did what almost any child her age would do in that situation.

She screamed.

Xander winced, scrambling to his feet as he pushed her behind him. "What IS that thing!?"

Faced with a question, Hermione reacted according to her nature and answered, sounding remarkably calm for someone who had just let out a blood curdling shriek of terror.

"It looks like a Mountain troll. Th... There aren't many of them in this area, and none are su-supposed to be able to get past Hogwarts w-wards."

"Great. We had to get the genius troll." Xander muttered, waving his wand threateningly, hoping that the thing had some fear of them as many animals had fear of guns. If it didn't, well Xander didn't actually know any spells that he could use here so...

"A little help here!?" He muttered, still pushing Hermione behind him as he backed away from the thing, waving his wand futilely as the troll clearly indicated no fear of either him or his stick.

"How!?" Hermione blurted in his ear, "It's a *Mountain troll*!"

"You're the book genius, right!?" Xander growled, flinching back as the Troll swung its club past them hard enough for the air to blast them in the face.

"It's a TROLL!" Hermione screamed at him, "Sure I know how to cast a stunner, but I'm not remotely strong enough to..."

"I don't CARE! It's not like we have a lot of other options!"

"Fine!" She huffed, all signs of fear gone from her face and voice as she snapped at Xander, "You move your wand like this and say *STUPIFY*!"

A faded red glow burst from her wand, splattering against the troll's face and caused it to snap back for a second, shaking like it had just been slapped. Then it growled at them and hefted its club for a heavy swing, roaring its anger.

"Are you happy now!?" Hermione screamed, "We made it MAD!"

"Oh yes, because it was trying to take SUCH good care of us before!" Xander snarled, twisting as he did, then grabbing her and spinning around. He used the force of his spin to throw her clear as he was tossed back in the other direction, just missing the splintering crash of the Troll's hammer as it crushed the stonework of the bathroom.

Hermione was sprawled in the corner as the Troll turned on her, and Xander shook himself as he got to his hands and knees and thrust out his wand.

"STUPIFY!"

The blast was much brighter as the discharge slammed into the Troll, but the effect was largely the same. It did, however, momentarily confused the troll into trying to decide between two targets. As it stared dumbly at them for a moment the door behind it burst open to reveal Ron and Harry, who froze for a moment themselves when presented with the Troll in real life.

Then Hermione screamed again and everyone unfroze.

The Troll turned at her, hefting its club again, and the two boys burst into action. They charged in, trying to tackle it from behind, only to be thrown clear. Ron hit the ground sliding, then slammed into the far wall with brutal force, leaving Harry hanging on for dear life as the Troll tried to knock him clear.

Harry beat at the Troll's head as best he could, his fists bruising, but to little other effect, then reached around to pummel its face. The Troll grunted, more in frustration than any degree of pain, until Harry somehow managed to drive his wand up the Troll's nose.

THAT apparently either hurt or really embarrassed the big guy, Xander noted as it howled and started striking at its back with renewed vigor. Xander was about ready to try the stunner again when Ron Weasley let out a yell.

"Wingardium LEVIOSA!"

Xander blinked, confused. 'What the hell is he trying to levitate!?'

The answer came when the troll's own club rose up, then slammed back down on its head, dropping troll and Harry to the floor.

A deep silence fell over the washroom, panting breaths of the four students the only thing breaking it for a long moment, then a screech from outside startled them all into turning with wands at the ready.

"What is HAPPENING here!?" Professor McGonagall snapped, striding in with Professor Snape and Headmaster Dumbledore on her heels. The three found themselves looking down the wands of four first years, who were in various states of distress but looked like they were uninjured.

"Uh..." Harry said, looking around. "We uh..."

"It's my fault, professor..." Hermione began, only to be cut off.

"No, it's ours. Right, Harry?" Ron cut in.

Harry blinked, then nodded, "Yeah. We heard about the troll and..."

Ron looked around furiously, "And we thought we could handle him, right?"

Xander shook his head as the Head of Gryffindor House grew redder and redder. "Bullshit."

Everyone stopped and stared at him in shock.

"Mr. HARRIS!" McGonagall snapped, "Five points from Slytherin for your language!"

"Explain yourself, Harris." Snape hissed.

Xander pointed at Ron, "He said something stupid, Hermione was hurt by it, she came here to compose herself. I followed, we never heard about the troll. I'm guessing those two did..."

The two Gryffindor's nodded miserably.

Xander shrugged, then went on, "And decided to save their friend. Why they're making up some dumbass story, I don't know, cause it's not like anyone did anything wrong in the first place..."

He paused, then shrugged, "Except Weasely, who should learn to keep his mouth shut if he doesn't have anything nice to say."

Ron turned bright beat red as Xander shrugged past them, then paused by the teachers and looked up at his head of house. "Just in case, Sir... How *does* one stop a Mountain Troll? That stunner really didn't work."

Snape stared, one eyebrow rising, "You successfully cast a Stunner?"

Xander nodded, "Hermione too. Didn't work on that thing."

"Excellent spell work," Snape replied, "Five points to Slytherin. We'll speak later."

"And five to Gryffindor as well," McGonagall said, nodding to Hermione, before she turned on Ron and Harry. "However five points from each of your for not following instructions to return to your dorm rooms. Now come along, we'll get you checked out."

Through it all the Headmaster remained silent, eyes twinkling as he carefully set the scene in his mind to reexamine later.


"Poppy says that they're all fine," Dumbledore said with a sigh as he took a seat and faced the professors sitting in his office.

"Well thank goodness," Minerva said, shaking just slightly. The thought of how close those students had come to serious injury or worse shook even her Gryffindor courage, more than any attack on her own person ever had. "What were those boys thinking!?"

"That they were idiotic Gryffindors," Snape replied, snorting.

Minerva shot him a scowl, but it was weakened by the fact that the headmaster seemed to find the comment amusing, and even Fillius was chuckling softly. "All very well for you to laugh, if they had been hurt however..."

Dumbledore held up his hand as the laughter stopped, "We know, Minerva, and the only reason we can laugh is that it's over and they're fine. Still, Severus does have a point... Ronald and Harry were acting as one might expect for Gryffindor students who thought a friend might be in danger."

"True." She sighed, then frowned slightly. "What about Mr. Harris? He had no reason to be there."

"True as well," Severus replied with a matching scowl. "By all accounts he went looking for Miss Granger when Weasley shot his mouth off after charms class."

Fillius nodded, "I heard the altercation... to be honest, at the time I thought that Mr. Harris was merely taking advantage of an opportunity to score points off a Gryff."

"That doesn't seem to be the case," Albus Dumbledore said slowly, "The impression I received was quite different. Do Mr. Harris and Miss Granger know one another?"

"Not to my knowledge," Snape shrugged as the others agreed.

Minerva couldn't help but twit her colleague slightly, smirking as she spoke, "I suppose he was just being particularly courageous then... like Gryffindor, one might say."

"And one might NOT." Snape snapped, eyes glinting.

Dumbledore looked on in amusement as the two sniped back and forth for a few moments, then interjected, "Now, now, quiet the two of you. Merely because one is a Slytherin hardly eliminates courage from the assets one might wield. You of all people know this, Severus."

Snape scowled, but didn't respond.

Pomona Sprout, head of Hufflepuff house, took that moment to toss a little more fat on the fire as the case may be. "Personally, I appreciated the Hufflepuff loyalty they showed one another."

Albus fiercely locked down on open laughter as both Severus and Minerva turned on the head of Hufflepuff house, their ire dripping from them as they defended the 'honor' of their houses. He shouldn't find it so amusing, he supposed, but Severus and Minerva were so rarely on the same side of an argument... let alone so enthusiastic about it, that he couldn't help but find it comical.

"That's enough," He broke in gently, eyes dancing as he again calmed them down, then glanced at the one head of house who hadn't put in his own two sickles worth, "Unless you have something to add, Fillius?"

The short head of Ravenclaw merely smirked and shook his head, "No, I don't believe any of them acted intelligent enough to be admired by a Ravenclaw, though Ronald's creative use of a levitation spell warrants a mention I suppose."

Dumbledore did chuckle that time, nodding, "Quite so. Is there anything else?"

"Yes, actually," Fillius broke in, "It's unrelated, however..."

"Please, Fillius, what is on your mind?"

"I'd like to ask the Hat about one of my students," Fillius said softly.

The other heads of house turned to look at him, curious. Most years no one felt any need to inquire after the Hogwarts sorting hat about its choices, however it did come up on occasion.

"Indeed? Who, Fillius?"

"Miss Addams." Fillius admitted, shivering slightly. "The girl had literally terrified every girl in her year, and most of the boys as well."

Dumbledore sat back, "In what way?"

Fillius shook his head, "Honestly, I'm not sure. She's not *done* anything I can find... Personally I think it's just her very attitude, combined with the way she speaks. She's quite intimidating."

Snape snorted, shaking his head. "Really, Fillius, intimidated by a first year."

"Have you paid any attention to her in class?" Fillius challenged.

"Not that I recall," Snape shrugged, then frowned. "Now that I think of it, she does seem to sit alone mostly. Quiet, studious... typical Ravenclaw."

Fillius quivered in place, obviously holding back some explosive retort. "Typical Ravenclaw students don't calmly speak of chaining their fellows up in the dungeon and *playing* with Mr. Filch's artifacts."

Snape raised a single eyebrow, "Indeed. Well now, that IS interesting. Albus?"

The teachers looked to the headmaster, who sighed. "The Addamses are a very old family with... well known proclivities."

Minerva snorted, "They're a bloody menace, you mean."

"No, I do not Minerva," Dumbledore said sternly, "And I will thank you not to put words in my mouth."

The Gryffindor headmaster flushed, but nodded.

"No Addams has ever gone... precisely... Dark, as we mean the term," Albus sighed. "That is to say, none have ever attempted to force their beliefs on anyone else. By any definition, they are a very dark family, but they strongly believe that people must make their own decisions. No Addams would have ever joined with Voldemort, I can assure you Fillius."

After shuddering slightly at the mention of You-Know-Who's name, Flitwick nodded, "Still I would like to hear from the sorting hat, if you don't mind."

Albus nodded and rose, turning to retrieve the hat from its place on his shelves. "You have been listening?"

"Of course." The Hat replied.

"Have you anything to add?" Albus asked softly.

The hat was silent for a moment, then began, "In Ravenclaw or Slytherin, that girl would go. Either house would be proud to claim her, I promise you both. The Raven's mind will trump the snake's cunning, though, and her future is a great one."

Albus frowned, then nodded, "Well there you have it, Fillius."

The head of Ravenclaw didn't look happy, but he nodded.

"Pardon," Snape leaned forward, "What of Mr. Harris, Hat? He's been caught in several fights within Slytherin House already, and tonight's excursion with the *kittens* of Gryffindor have me curious."

Minerva stiffened, glaring at Snape, but before anyone could say anything the hat spoke up.

"Ah, Alexander. The Heart of any Gryffindor, the Soul of any Hufflepuff." The hat replied coolly.

That sufficiently redirected the ire of Minerva McGonagall from Snape. "What!? You put one of my Griff's in *Slytherin*!?"

Sprout's reaction was remarkably similar.

"A Hufflepuff in Slytherin!? Are you insane!?"

"Minerva, Pomona, please." Albus sighed, calming them, then he looked at the hat, "Please, explain yourself."

The hat took a moment, then began to speak again.

"At Gryffindor's side, this one would stand tall, In Hufflpuff's embrace he would only survive... Molded by Slytherin's fist, however, this boy will *thrive*."

The professor's looked at one another, more than slightly shocked.

"What does that mean?" Sprout demanded, "Only survive? You said he had a Hufflpuff's soul!"

The Hat, however, had said what it intended and would speak no more.

Albus frowned, sitting back as the professors argued, primarily Sprout and McGonagall he noted. Severus was glaring at the hat, his own thoughts occluded behind the Slytherin's impressive shields. After a few more moments of argument, he leaned forward.

"Well, I think that explains things." Albus said calmly.

"What!?" The two turned on him.

He smiled at them both, "I too have observed young Alexander, and I believe I agree with the Hat. He is most certainly brave, and would do acceptably in Gryffindor. He does seem to lack certain Slytherin traits that I found perplexing until just now... however, with the hat's comments concerning Hufflepuff, I believe I understand."

"Well explain it to me!" Sprout huffed.

"The sorting hat's job isn't to place people in houses that fit their personality, contrary to popular opinion," Albus said, surprising them into silence.

"It's... not?" Minerva asked hesitantly. "But, Albus..."

The headmaster smiled, waving a hand, "Oh that is how it generally works out, Minerva... in fact, that is how the hat will make its choice, barring any other information. In this case, I feel that Alexander is jarringly lacking in the ambition that Salazar held in high regard. That lack, in Hufflepuff, would lead him to fall into mediocrity... As we've seen tonight, I do not believe that he is fated for that. Slytherin will challenge him, force him to grow. It should be a fascinating process to observe."

Minerva huffed, "If he needs challenge, I have no doubt my Gryff's could provide it."

"Perhaps. Perhaps not." Albus shrugged, "In either case, the point is moot. Alexander shows no interest in challenging his placement, and I don't see Severus gnashing his teeth at the situation."

The two women looked at Snape, who merely shrugged. "The boy is no worse, nor any better, than most of my students. I see no reason to cause a scandal over some insignificant child."

Minerva began to stiffen, words of censure coming to her lips, but Albus smoothly cut her off.

"Indeed, well then, any other business?"


Severus Snape paused at the face of the blank wall that led to the Slytherin Common Room, considering what he had learned so far. Potter was, as expected, a foolish Gryffindor with delusions of adequacy. His fame and, as much as Snape hated to admit it, the charm he'd inherited from his father, had already led him to gather together his own circle of delinquents.

Granger and Weasley certainly seemed to fill the role of Lupin and Black, and Potter was quite obviously his father's son.

For the moment, however, there was his own little delinquent to manage. Severus glared at the wall and it slid open without him saying a word, leading the professor to smirk in satisfaction as he stepped inside.

Harris was sitting by the fire, and Severus took a few seconds to observe the boy.

As expected, he was alone. He hadn't slid into any of the known cliques within Slytherin, and as far as Snape could ascertain, his own semi-close friend was Fillius' stray raven, the Addams scion. The boy was petting a *puppy* of all things, which Snape found utterly disgusting until he realized that it must be the boy's familiar.

Odd that, the school notes clearly suggested cats, rats, or toads. Severus scowled as he approached, "Harris."

"Sir?" Xander Harris said, head turning calmly to look at him.

Snape snorted, realizing that the boy had been waiting to be approached. "Who taught you to cast a stunner?"

"Hermione, Sir."

"Granger? I wasn't aware that you two knew each other." Snape frowned.

"We don't, Sir. She showed me while the Troll was attacking us."

Snape stared at the boy, schooling his face to an inscrutable glare. Try as he might he couldn't even fabricate any evidence of falsehood in the boy's expression, and that was mind boggling. First that Granger knew how to cast a Stunner, though he supposed that he shouldn't be so surprised that the little know it all had read that far ahead. However the fact that she was able to *teach* it in the midst of a life or death situation, and that this boy had been able to LEARN it.

"Show me." Snape growled.

"Sir?"

"Is there something wrong with your ears," Snape gestured, "Cast at the wall."

"Yes Sir." Harris said, swallowing as he drew his wand.

Snape watched impassively as the boy mumbled to himself, obviously trying to psyche himself up for the task. Finally he slashed his wand, with the distinctive twist of a Stupefy and snapped out the incantation. Snape merely raised an eyebrow as his wand glowed for a moment, spat a few sparkles, then fizzled out.

"That was hardly a stunner, boy."

Harris flushed, but nodded and tried again, to much the same effect.

Snape was almost ready to tell the boy off for wasting his time when Draco Malfoy called out from across the room.

"Having a little problem, Harris!? I hear that happens to a lot of you barbarians from America!"

Snape shot a glare over his shoulder, annoyed at Malfoy for interrupting his time, and didn't notice Harris' face screw up in a flash of anger.

"Stupefy!"

Snape snapped around in time to see a bright stunner bolt flash across the room and slam into one of the Slytherin drapes and burst the tapestry into flames. He watched it for a moment, then stepped forward with his own wand raised.

"Aquamenti!" Snape called, hosing the fire down.

Silence reigned as he walked over to the wall and idly ran his finger along the scorched surface of the stone wall.

"Impressive power for a first year, Mr. Harris," Snape said calmly, turning back to the boy. He sheathed his wand and withdrew a book from his robes, handing it to Xander. "This is a reference of mystical beasts, their uses and weaknesses, and common spells used to contain, or combat them. The section on Mountain Trolls begins on page eighty two."

"Thank you, Sir."

"One last thing," Snape said, formulating a question he'd wanted to ask all night.

"Sir?"

"Why did you stop those twits from lying to cover for each other?" Snape asked, curious, "Whatever they said didn't include you."

Xander looked at him, then shrugged, "Always tell the truth, Sir. Lying is wrong."

Snape heard a snicker from behind him, and tilted his head slightly. "Is that so?"

"Yes Sir."

Severus had the distinct impression that the boy was serious, but there was something else there too. Snape frowned, leaning in and speaking quietly. "I don't mind telling you, that's an odd statement from a Slytherin, assuming you mean it..."

Xander just smiled slightly. "Lying is stupid, sir, unless you have a damned good reason. We didn't, so I wouldn't."

"And if you have a good reason?" Snape asked seriously.

"Well then, Sir, I suppose having a reputation for being honest would help me out then, wouldn't it?"

Snape snorted, "It would indeed. Good Night, Mr. Harris. Try not to get involved in anymore Gryffindor foolishness, it's beneath a Slytherin."

Snape's robes billowed out as he turned and strode from the room.

'Courage and Loyalty be damned, the boy may be lacking ambition, but he knows the meaning of the word cunning if nothing else.'


The next day Wednesday Addams found Xander sitting alone, looking out over the lake. She quietly sat down beside him and they both stared for a while before either spoke.

"You know about Mountain trolls?" Xander asked finally.

She nodded, "We don't have many in America, but there are three who are Addamses."

That brought him up short, and he turned to stare at her, "Really?"

"Oh yes. Lurg is a great uncle, I think... maybe three times removed?" She shrugged, "He's very nice."

"The one yesterday wasn't too nice."

"Trolls are easy to anger, and don't usually like humans." Wednesday said calmly, "I imagine that he was very put out to find himself in a human castle."

Xander blinked, "I thought he broke in?"

"Oh no," She shook her head, "Trolls don't like human buildings. They like their mountainsides, with natural magics reverberating around them."

Xander frowned, "That's not in the book..."

"Which book?" She asked, glancing over. When she saw it she grimaced, one of the few genuine emotions Xander had ever seen her make, "Oh. THAT book."

"You know it?"

She nodded, "it's a hunter's book, Alexander. It details how to kill and capture mystical people."

Xander shook his head, "people? There are no people in here... just a lot of weird animals."

She rolled her eyes, "really. Didn't I tell you about Uncle Lurg? You want to tell him that he's an animal to his face?"

It was Xander's turn to grimace, "Pass."

"I thought you might." Wednesday said with a hint of satisfaction. "The book is accurate, as far as the facts go, just try not to listen to the opinions."

Xander nodded, "I'll try."

"Good. Now, are you alright?"

"Yeah. It was scary as hell, but we survived."

The Addams scion nodded, "Good. Now then... I need your help."

"Oh? With what?"

"I want to know who forced that poor troll into the castle."