This chapter starts at the point where the trio goes into the portal. Refer to the last chapter, if you're confused.
Humphrey didn't know where he was, or even who he was, for that matter. All he knew was that he hated the unconscious brown thing in front of him.
He instantly scrambled to his uneasy feet and hurried away from the sleeping ugly in front of him, only to be met with a wall in his face and a serving of pain.
The room they were entrapped in was made entirely of an unknown substance, the walls, ceilings and floors completely coated and polished to pristine perfection, but they weren't slippery at all, and felt like tape sticking to your feet, every time the friction jabbed at your paws.
Humphrey looked down at the floor and tilted his head slightly. He was now a safe enough distance away from the extremely oblong and misshapen ball of fur he so despised for no apparent reason, that he didn't care a bit about its existence anymore, and continued to investigate the floor, resembling a raccoon digging curiously for trash. He continued poking at the sticky, rubbery substance that was responsible for supporting his weight.
"Jeez, did they smear slime on this thing or something?" Humphrey wondered. "These human traps are really-
-I've been trapped!" Humphrey felt his vocal cords dry up. An air bubble compounded in his throat. He felt a pang of fear in his heart, getting worse and worse with every beat.
That was the plan, and it was working perfectly, and I will soon have enough energy for the immor- oh! Coffee's ready.
Ah, coffee. One of the few things I don't hate, yet. "It's absolutely wonderful, wouldn't you agree, Ex-God?"
"You're making a big mis-" Oh, shush! A simple button press and he's all gone now. Pest-y pests! I hate his fondness of blue, and his annoyingly non-demonic ways of immortalit- YARGH! wha-wha- oh. You idiot. You sipped frothing hot coffee down your food drain, did you not expect burns? Curse me and my mortal body!
Actually, this coffee is really good, even when it burns your larynx off.
oH, deAR WoOzY, Im gOd
WOahat? Hold for a few seconds. Am I rejuvenating my cranial capacity at this given position in the orbit of the earth around the sun, which is the giant burning sphere of flaming hydrogen and helium responsible for all life on earth, and therefore, enabling my being, sentience, and ability to think?
I think, therefore I am.
Why do I suddenly find myself astutely observing my sudden spike in cerebration capacity-
Okay, whaaaaat just happened?
Is that Kate? Wait, am I not supposed to be her.. mate?
But why? Do I love her? I should... but... do I? Humphrey, don't be ridiculous! Of course you love he- I... Shut up, Humphrey! What happened?
No, I am getting confused! I don't do this! Why am I... MY HEAD HURTS!
It's all because of her! No, don't be ridiculous, she loves you.. why do I hate her? I DON'T KNOW!
Okay, think think, Humphrey, jokes, jokes, uhhhh... Right! Kate rhymes with mate! hahahaha no KATE IS MY MATE why IS SHE my MATE! IS she really my MATE!
"What are you doing, Humphrey? You seem disturbed!"
I saw a human. A human. A hu-
"A-are you okay, Humphrey?" WHY IS THE HUMAN TALKING TO ME-
"Do you want a glass of... water? Juice? Something? Anything? Uhh.. hot coffee?"
"Who are YOU?"
"Humphrey, do you not know who your best friend is?" He wore a shocked expression on his face so real that...
"How can I trust you?"
"Tell me this is a joke, Humphrey. Hahaha, good one, buddy. D-d-do you not... remember me?"
"Am I... your best friend? For real?"
"Yes, best friend."
"Then tell me, what is going on with me and Kate?
"You still care about her after she dumped you a year ago? You really got knocked hard on the head this time, didn't you?" Kate... dumped me? But... 'This time'?
"I think I've pieced together whatever is happening. I think... I think, I think... when you slammed against that rock, you lost some memory. Specifically ones including me. Don't worry, little buddy, I will help you out". Saying this, he sat up from the stool I didn't know he was sitting on, and walked away a short distance, to stare at a wall. For someone who just lost their best friend, this guy seems... awfully composed. Something smells fishy here... or is it just the smell emanating from the probably dead Kate? Good job, Humphrey, you're back to joking around again! This all felt incredibly fast, though... reminds of some other time the both of us were suddenly sucked into danger... can't place it, though...
Wait. "The both of us"? Somehow, that doesn't feel like it involved this guy, whatever his name was? Now I feel like a jerk, because I don't remember his name. Wait...
"Wait if Kate dumped me a year ago what is she doing here-"
Sorry Humphrey, I didn't have anything against you, but you're too smart for your own good. Now, Kate on the other hand, I hold a personal grudge against...
Eve, you WILL pay, and you will pay A LOT.
Part II - Twice the Kate
"When I woke up that day, I was confused. All I knew was that I was jumping off of a train, and now...?
I looked around, for any signs of danger. None.
"You aren't actually awake, Kate. This is a dream." A deep voice boomed from nowhere.
Who was that?! My mind began searching for answers. I looked around in a disoriented daze, my vision flickering to different parts of the room I was in.
"Who are you? Show yourself."
Dad? No, the voice was deeper than his. Too deep. It was someone I hadn't met before.
"I can't, Kate. Not until you understand what-"
"Who are you? Where is Humphrey? Where are the rest of the pack members?" I interrupted him, fuming with anger and curious with confusion.
"Kate, you need to temporarily forget about them and-"
"NO! You don't understand! If I don't intervene the pack will go to war and- and-" I paused. Thinking of the death of my family members was too hard for me.
I don't know why, maybe it was because I was afraid that the pack would perish, or I was afraid that I would never see Humphrey again, or both, or something else, but I started crying.
Where am I?
"Kate, I'll explain everything. You need to trust me, though. Will you?"
I took a deep, shaky breath. This was just too much. "Alright. I trust you. Go on." I had no idea what was happening, why I was alone in this... what is this place, anyway? This stranger was the only shadow of hope I had left. I didn't know who brought me here, why I am here, and whether this is a dream or not. I'd prefer the former.
"Kate, this may sound preposterous, but I am a time traveller."
"With everything that has happened in the last couple of seconds, I don't find that weird at all. Go on."
"So... how do I start...? Uh...
Okay, Kate, recap time:
You fell in love with-"
"Whoa, whoa! Wait, I am going to cut you off right there. I will never like that sucker Garth, who do you think you are?" Okay, this guy was getting on my nerves. I bared my sharp alpha teeth at his invisible muzzle. You see, back then, I didn't know that I actually loved Humphrey. Now, I know better.
"Hey, hey, let me finish. I didn't say Garth."
My eyes widened to the size of Marcel's golf balls. WHAT!
"You will marry Humphrey."
OH MY GOD YES YES YES I COULDN'T BELIEVE IT"
"AAAAAA! Jeez, your voice is louuud!"
"Doesn't that mean that your voice is also loud?"
I found out from Daniel that I fainted right then and there, because of excitement. That was actually the moment I realized I was in love with your husband.
Eventually, Daniel explained the rest of the story to me and managed to transport me to the future. And now, I am here. With you, future Kate."
Wow. I wasn't expecting that. How did Daniel pull it off?
"Wait, but... what happens after this? You will eventually have to go back to your own timeline, right?"
"Daniel also told me whatever happened in your timeline. All I need to do is to act like I got crushed by a caribou, and then spring back to life and propose to him on the spot. Simple! So, whatever happened in the weeks of coping I had to do with Daniel?"
Tears filled my eyes. I looked down at the cold, hard ground. My eyes burned with sadness.
"Oh." I could sense that she didn't want me to continue, because she didn't want to make me even sadder. But not telling her would delay the mission even longer.
"It's okay, Kate. I'll tell you. I don't... mind at all."
Slimy Kate, always managing to slip away from me... reminds me of her mother. Eve. Disgusting.
I had to suffer so much because of her insufferable temptations, and she's still living on the surface, still getting reincarnated again and again and again...
I've been through FOUR OTHER DAMN UNIVERSES constantly suffering and toiling, even to the extent of being tasked with helping SISYPHUS in his impossible task, while God and Eve get to be reborn again and again and again...
God, I can understand. Back in the times of the first universe, God was supposed to be a judge. He judged our actions, and decided our futures. And besides, this new 'Daniel' form seems to be a much more kind (kind, not loving) guy, always giving seconds chances and redemption, even opening the gates of heaven, to let spirits into the mortal realm to meet their descendants and family.
Even after getting us both expelled from that garden, guess what she wanted to do? Have children. She fantasized and dreamt on and on and on about naming the children Cain and Abel and blah blah blah blah blah...
Sure. Fine. Okay. Yeah, sure. Now you want children. So you get children. I gave her children.
But the problem with children is...
You get attached to them.
Then the murder. I was devastated, after the murder of Abel, by his own brother no less!
More children, aaaaaaaaand...
Then I died.
Eve got to go on in life, and when she died, she simply reincarnated.
I on the other hand...
I don't even want to think about it.
Eventually, though, I gained knowledge. I gained the power to open my eyes. I saw Eve for what she was. A childish, immature thing who only wants to "preserve humanity", as she put it. I saw love for what it is. Not real affection, just a biological tool for copy-pasting more of us into the world. Love isn't real. And that's what broke me.
Everything I felt for Eve was gone now. It was all an illusion.
I mean, if it is real, why doesn't Daniel have a significant other? He's obviously the reincarnation of God, and God should be able to feel love, right?
I pity Humphrey. And that was why I didn't kill him. I gave him a piece of the fruit from the tree of life or something, so that he may never have to know the hardships I faced. He looked like a young me, stupid me, believing in the existence of love, with the only difference between me and him being the fact that he was more wolf. Wait...
Aren't humans the only beings who are sentient? Did Eve...
Noo... Surely she didn't...
Yeah, maybe it was one of the reincarnates of God who gave sentience to the animals. Because I don't think Eve would like that idea.
After all these years of trying to get access to Eve, I did finally get access to Kate, through Humphrey, but she just slips away every time ughhhh!
I literally LOCKED HER UP in the same room I locked HUMPHREY in and yet HOW DID SHE ESCAPE ARRGGGGGHHH!
I realized I was about to smash my cup of coffee, and I did not like wasting coffee.
I took a small sip.
After tiring out from all those millennia of working, caffeine was a huge life-saver for me.
When I get access to Daniel's emergency experimental time-travel tech, the first thing I'll do with it is go back to 15-century Yemen and thank the people there for inventing the idea of liquid coffee.
Part III - Already done.
Adam POV (Oh no)
Ooh! Nice! It worked alright. I guess.
why do i sound mad oof ikr
right so im walking on the street and this woman comes up to me and i ask hello maam may i help you and she says she sees a ghost in me and spiritual cr4p and i kill her and now the world knows about me lol
im ur new king now, my subjects! i said while sitting on my throne. i dont need to go to heaven for heaven
now kate and daniel are missing :( (but who cares bcos shes not gonna come back) so i killd all the wolfs except humfry yay
humfry is immortal i like humfry hes the co-hero of the story (after me of course) i also like spelling his name that way
wow we 'homo sapiens' have really progressed since the time of the first form of the man upstairs
i like how we how keep the banter light and fluffeh and all lowercase and internet 5p33k, for the first time i actually fit in (sad ik but its wholesome now :))
note to self: dont use brackets next to smiley faces it looks weird in my head
why am i even transcribing everything i speak in my head thats rlly weird
bruh resistence is not an option bcoz youre dead boiii - thats what i said to him looooooooooooool and then he died
THE END? I DIED? BUT HOW
HOW DID I DIE!?
I FEEL MY SOUL CRUMBLING TO SHARDS! NO, DON'T DO THIS, PLEASE! I'LL BE GOOD, I PROMISE!
"Is he dead? For good?" She asked me.
I was about to reply, but the other Kate did it for me- "Yes, he should be."
At the end of the day, even if I did have to destroy Adam's soul, At least we managed to bring the dead people and wolves back, so there were no casualties.
We sent past Kate back to the past, and helped her do her part perfectly- and it produced perfect results- It lead to past Kate loving Humphrey and Humphrey loving her even more than they were supposed to, causing a ripple effect, which lead to the couple loving each other even more, fixing the rip in space-time.
Say, who knew that Kate would actually turn out to be the heroine of the story? I was expecting Humphrey to be the saviour of the day.
This conundrum also lead to Kate gaining both the versions of the memories of the past. One where everything went as planned- and the other where she was called to help here. Most mortals wouldn't have been able to handle this- but Kate's not a mortal now, is she?
You're confused now, right? I know. I'm working on chapter 7, which will cover all that has happened. Now, you might be asking me: Why make the chapter preceding this chapter when this chapter's already done? Because time travel. The entire story takes place from the time perspective of the universe- that's right, Humphrey and Kate weren't actually transported to the past in the first chapter - Fate didn't actually fail itself - it was sabotage.
Thanks a lot, to all the people responsible for the insane 541(!) views that this story has right now- at 8:11 PM GMT on Monday, June 15, 2000 + 20. It's been great.
Writer with a heart