So, I've not written anything in months. Not been in a great place and even the thought of switching the laptop on has felt draining. But, here goes. Just a little one shot to potentially get me back into the swing of things and hopefully get back into my multi chapter fics.
Laying in the guest bed of her parents home, Chloe's mind was working over time. The house was silent, with her parents already having gone to bed an hour previous. She hated the silence, it always lead to her thinking about Beca. She had desperately been trying to think of anything else when her phone buzzed and lit up on the bedside table.
It's not like it hadn't been going off constantly for the past month. Every single Bella had sent texts, emails and attempted phone calls with the redhead but nearly all, Chloe had ignored. She knew that they just cared. That they were concerned and she had read every message but she didn't didn't feel ready to communicate with everybody just yet.
The redhead almost dropped the phone when she saw the name below the text notification. Her hands began to shake, unsure as to whether she wanted to read it or not. She hadn't once heard from Beca in the last month, which she had guessed would happen. Beca had a habit of shutting down when she was angry or upset, or even when she was simply confused.
And Chloe knew that she had to be feeling all of those emotions. She had just up and left one day whilst Beca was at work with absolutely no reasoning, just a simple apology left on a post it note. She had done the one thing she had promised Beca she never would do. She left.
Three days before the wedding, Chloe woke to an empty bed. Squinting over at the alarm clock on Beca's bedside table she noticed that it wasn't even quite 5:30am. Beca was never up before 7am, so immediately, curiosity ran through her. It took the redhead a few seconds to rub the drowsiness of sleep from her eyes. Glancing around the room quickly, she saw that the en-suite bathroom light was on and glowing from underneath the closed door.
Chloe slowly padded over to the door and tried to turn the handle. It was locked. Confusion was evident in the redheads facial features. ''Bec?…..Babe, you okay?''
Beca cleared her throat on the other side of the bathroom door. ''Uh, yeah. I-I...I'll be out in a, uh, in a-a minute.''
Chloe's stomach dropped. She knew that tone. Beca only stuttered when she was upset. She desperately tried to think of anything that had happened yesterday that might have caused this, but there was nothing. They'd spent the day finishing all the last minute wedding jobs. Putting together the favour boxes and filling them with the little gifts. They'd laughed, they'd danced around like idiots and they'd made love on the couch after Chloe had -originally jokingly- given Beca a lap dance.
''Baby, open the door…..please.'' Chloe somehow spoke with a mixture of softness and sternness.
Knowing she had no other choice, Beca opened the door slowly. Cheeks stained with tear tracks, eyes puffy and red and eyes knit together tightly. She looked up into Chloe's eyes and let out an audible sob. The redhead was immediately in front of her. Wrapping her arms around the smaller women and holding her tightly.
Chloe had known for a long time how to handle situation like this. She knew she had to let Beca cry it out, let her calm down slightly before throwing any questions at her. So that is exactly what she did. She held Beca close, rubbing a hand up and down her back soothingly and placing a kiss on the top of her head. It was probably a few minutes before the brunettes sobs eased into slight hiccups.
Keeping contact on Beca's shoulders, Chloe pulled away slightly look at her. ''What's going on Bec? Why are you upset?'' she asked with a gentle squeeze on the brunettes shoulders.
''I...I had a dream.'' Beca couldn't look up into her finance's eyes. Instead her eyes were trained on her own hands. She let out an audible sigh before continuing. ''I had a dream that you left me. At the alter. It felt so real and when I woke up I felt like I couldn't breath. Like something was squeezing my heart and my throat at the same time. And I-I….It just felt so real and I honestly think that my heart will quite literally break if you leave me. It will Chlo.'' The sobs had bubbled up in the brunettes throat once again, tears filling her eyes as she quickly glanced up at the redhead.
''Bec, it was just a dream. I'm not leaving.''
''You don't know that. You can't predict the future.'' Beca sounded a little petulant but Chloe let it slide, there was no use in pointing it out when Beca was clearly already so emotional.
''Rebecca Allison Mitchell. Listen to me. I am not going anywhere. So stop worrying that pretty little head of yours. Whatever happens in our future, so long as you promise to do the same, I will do everything in my power to make sure that we work at out relationship. I pinky promise.'' She said with a small smile, holding her pinky finger out for Beca to do the same.
Shaking the memory out of her mind, Chloe picked up her cell phone and opened the message.
Please come back Chlo. I miss you. I need you. Whatever I did, I'm sorry. I love you. Please just come home. I can fix this.
Chloe broke down. She had been prepared for the text to contain anger and hatred and a lot of cursing. Beca essentially blaming herself was not what she expected. The pain in her chest made it hard for her to calm down as she choked on sobs.
Her decision to leave Beca was not easy. Weeks went by whilst she made up her mind. Chloe knew it would be one of the most difficult choices she would ever have to make. Truth be told, she didn't even want to make it, but she had to do what she thought was right.
She had been happy with the brunette. She loved her. Every single ounce of her. She had waited years for Beca, waited for her to reciprocate those feelings. It had almost felt to Chloe, what she imagined it would feel life to win the lottery when it finally happened. When Beca all but blurted out that she was in love with the older women.
Their first kiss was so overwhelming. It was feather-light and slow and the redhead had proceeded to burst into tears the second they parted. So many pent up emotions over the years flooding out of her all at once. She could still remember how instead of the usual panic that Beca conveyed whenever Chloe cried, the brunette simple wrapped her arms around her and held her until her sobbed died down. She knew she had loved Beca for years, but she fell further in love with her in that very moment.
The first time they made love, Beca was the one with tears in her eyes. Though she desperately tried to hide it and denied it whenever the redhead brought it up. That was the night that Beca admitted that she had also had had feelings for Chloe, that she slowly been falling in love with her over their years of friendship. She had shyly explained to the redhead that she never thought that she would ever be good enough for Chloe, but would prove to her every day that she loved her more than anything in the world. Seeing the loving and honest side of Beca made the redheads heart swell in her chest.
Telling the other Bella's about their relationship was a quick affair. There were squeals and 'Awws' and a very definite 'about fucking time' muttered from Amy. The pair had simply smiled at each other at their friends reaction, it's not like they had really expected anything else from the group.
Their life had moved by pretty quickly. After graduation and worlds, they had moved in together in LA. So many people had said they were rushing, having only officially been in a relationship for seven months before making that decision to officially rent a home together and settle into the real world, but they had proved everybody wrong. They were married for three years now. Three very happy years.
Of course they had had arguments. Silly arguments. Usually over Beca not putting a new toilet roll on the holder when she used the last of the old one, or Chloe continuously interrupting Beca when she was working on a song at home. The usually pathetic disagreements that any healthy relationship had.
Things were always resolved quickly. They'd made that promise to resolves any issues as quickly as possible, just days before their wedding. That same conversation where Chloe promised that she would never leave. Which is what made the decision to leave, so incredibly difficult for the redhead.
After re-reading the text multiple times, Chloe hadn't realised how much she was shaking until her thumbs hovered over the screen of her cell phone, desperately willing herself not to reply no matter how much she wanted. Soon enough the shaking turned into sobs as Chloe flung her cell phone to the opposite side of the bed, and buried her head into the pillow in an attempted to mute her cries.
The tears and audible distress didn't dull, even once Chloe's mom quietly crept into the room and laid down next to her daughter and held her tightly.
''I...I don't know….what...what to do Mom. I-I just...miss her so much.'' The younger redhead managed between sobs.
She hated seeing her daughter so broken and sad. Katherine felt useless, there was nothing she could do to help Chloe through this, bar letting her know she was there to support her whilst she broke down in her arms. Waiting to speak until Chloe had considerably calmed down. ''Chloe, do you not think you should just tell her?''
The younger redhead, much calmer now even though tears still ran down her cheeks, simply shook her head before speaking. ''I can't. She has so much going on with work. This would just mess that up. It's….It's not fair on her.''
''She is your wife Chloe, she deserves to know that you have cancer.''
So, reviews are always welcomed. Sorry not sorry for the angst.