I had a load of writers block but apparently procrastination fixes writers block like nothing else, who knew. I hope everyone is doing good; I'm an Aussie so I'm pretty chill, but I know that the rest of the world is kinda imploding, so good luck and keep safe.

Borrowed the Colonello-is-related-to-Fleur concept from sakurademonalchemist's Another Soldier Reporting; it was an awesome idea.

- Colonello-

Colonello was woken by a heavy impact against his stomach.

"Oof. Fuck! Ouch." He groans as he tosses the giggling impactor off him. "What the fuck."

"FLEUR, COLONELLO SWORE" Gabrielle screamed. Colonello blinked and tried to remember why he would be at his cousins house when he hadn't seen them since he'd ditched his heritage before joining COMSUBIN. Actually, why would Gabrielle sound like a toddler.

"Colonello, stop swearing around Gabs. She called someone a 'fuck-wit' the other day and mum blamed me." Came the tired-of-this-shit voice of his favourite cousin. Colonello pried his eyes open and stared blearily at her. She was a kid; a sarcastic, smart-for-her-age kid, but a kid, nonetheless. Gabrielle was also looking like the toddler she'd sounded like.

"I think I somehow time-travelled into the past… What year is it?"

There was silence for a few seconds before Fleur responded with all the seriousness a seven-year-old can manage.

"I think we need to talk with the matriarch."


Lal Mirch opened her eyes and stared at the aggressively pink princess-bed-veil-thing. Sitting up she observed her plushie kingdom and cursed every god ever (and Irie Shoichi).

"Oh god no! When I wake up this will have just been a bad dream of my ridiculous childhood! It never happened!" Lal muttered and went back to sleep.

Her pink princess stage was meant to stay in the past!

(Denial is not just a river)


Reborn woke on the streets of Italy. Once he'd re-sparked his flames and figured that he was in the past and not, in fact, an illusion, he immediately went off in search of a decent handgun.

Smiling sadistically as he punched-out some poor mafioso with a sun-enhanced punch, he mentally halved the amount of time it would take to gain notoriety. He did it once when he knew nothing as a child and once as a literal baby with limited access to his flames.

Beating the current mafia into shape as a seven-year-old would only take couple years before the name Reborn was spoken with the same fear as they say 'Vindice'.


Harry made a face as they stared at the leaky cauldron. She was pretty sure that her mum's family were descended from squibs because she hadn't needed to highlight it with Petunia. Even without the possible magical issues, Skull didn't want to go back.

She'd left that place and its hell behind decades ago, and now she was staring at the slightly run-down entrance to the magical world and all her bravado seemed to be sucked away.

Stop being so pathetic.

She sighed yea, she really needed to buck her ideas up; this was her second chance, she couldn't just waste it hiding from her fears.

Skull grabbed her Aunt's hand and strode forward with all the confidence she could muster, this was her birthright, she would not hide from it.

"Hey Ma'am, ya heading to Diagon? You look lost." Tom said from the bar. Petunia jumped and nodded.

"Could you help me get in? My niece needs some stuff from there, but I'm about as magical as a brick so I have no idea how to get there." There was a slight silence in the bar as people turned to stare quizzically at the self-proclaimed muggle.

"You must have some magic in ya if you managed to find the bar. Squibs can get through tha barrier so ya just need ta get a key stone if ya want to come an go freely. I sell 'em for a galleon or 10 pounds, but tha magic folk never buy them cus they can jus' use their wands." Harry blinked, she didn't know that you could do that.

Petunia nods and walks over to the counter where she handed over 10 pounds and her eyes knitted together slightly.

"Squib?" Tom waves a glass he was drying around as he gesticulates.

"Yea, like ya have magic but ya can't use it cus ya pathways are blocked or broken somehow. You could still learn non-active skills like potions or runes if ya wanted. Did the kid's mum have magic?" Petunia seemed enthralled, the idea of her being able to practice any type of magic was, for lack of a better word, enchanting. The mention of her sister, however, brought a feeling of melancholy to the conversation.

"Yes, my sister attended Hogwarts, but she's no longer around. She was killed in her home." Tom nodded and sighed.

"Unfortunately, that was the end of a lot o' bright young'uns recently; the war really had its toll on the wizarding world. Anyway, you should keep an eye on any kids ya might have; Squib lines often turn up a couple muggleborns every few generations or so. Good luck on traversing the alley, ya might want to stay away from anyone who looks particularly nobby though; the purebloods don't like anyone who isn't at least a halfblood."

Petunia thanked Tom and guided Harry to the place the barkeep gestured and pressed the keystone to the wall. Her eyes widened as the wall literally fell away.

"Damn that's cool!" Petunia said making Skull choke and devolve into giggles, getting a fond look from her aunt. "Come on you little toerag."

They stepped into the wizarding world.


"I decided that anger wasn't doing anything, so I read a book on finding your inner calm and decided to practice some of its teachings." Fon said calmly to his highly sceptical family. It wasn't a lie, he had the book in his room, gifted by a particularly hopeful aunt, though, in his original life he'd only read it in his teen years.

"Sooo, you asking your sister what the exact date it was had nothing to do with anything?" Fon froze in a shit-I-got-caught moment and attempted to look innocent.

"Yes?" He got the eyebrow from his mother and sighed, Reborn would never have anything on his mother's omniscience.

"I may have quite possibly time travelled maybe." Fon said, his voice raising in pitch slightly. At the ensuing silence he pouted, "and this is why I was just going to let you think I suddenly got all chill, damn, this wouldn't have happened if young me wasn't a massive shit!" Fon made an annoyed noise and threw his hands up in the air.


Complete and utter silence.

"You know I still think you're possessed Feng." He raised his eyebrow at his sister and rolled his eyes.

"You marry that Japanese kid you're crushing over, I'd advise you spend your time wooing him instead of being annoying at me." An almost diabolical serene smile crosses his face, "your grandkid took after me in all but his flame; he'll be a cloud."

His sister goes a bit red and then slightly despairing at what is to come.

"So how old are you mentally?" His mother asks, Fon drew his eyebrows together and took a moment to add everything up.

"Either 61 or 68 depending on if you count my current age on top" Fon smiles serenely as his families minds break.



Luce sits at the table and waits for the arcobaleno to appear. She'd only seen glimpses in her visions, of the sadistic-sun Reborn, the stubborn-rain Lal Mirch and her student Colonello, the brilliant-lightning Verde, the mysterious-mist Viper, the powerful-storm Fon, and the naive, cowardly-cloud Skull. They would fight and bicker, but eventually they would start to trust each other and become a true family.

She leans back and enjoys the sense of everything falling into place. Even if it ends up killing her, eventually the curse would be broken, and her grandchild would walk free of the curse that had plagued her family for generations.

"OH MY GOD REBORN, YOU CAN'T JUST SAY THAT!" Luce jumped out of her skin as a loud female voice shrieked in indignation.

The door slammed open and instead of suspicious strangers filing in one by one, a group of people stormed in and looked around to find their chairs.

"I'm sitting on Fon's lap and if anyone objects, I will hex them."

"We don't care what you do with your husband, Skull"

"I care what she does with me."

"Do you object?"

"Quite the opposite, do with me as you will."

"I'm taking your chair then, Colonello can have mine."

"I'll babysit Donna then, it's my best chance at some halfway intelligent conversation."

Luce watches as the cloud who is the wrong gender flirted with the storm who seemed entirely receptive. The two rains entered together instead of Colonello spying from the outside, Lal sitting in what had been the cloud's chair.

The others only had slight differences; Verde had a book of runes of all things. Reborn had seemingly no weapons on him but had a number of rings on his fingers. Viper seemed to be having a conversation with a large snake wrapped around their shoulders.

"What the fuck is actually happening." Luce squeaked out getting the attention of the Arcobaleno candidates.

"Oh, here," Reborn handed her a stack of paper; the title said, 'How to Fix the Human Battery Issue, written by the Amazing Skull-sama'. "We're only here to give you that, see ya." Luce stares at the paper whilst hearing whining from the people who had already made themselves comfy.


"Well it's not like we wanted to be human batteries for the next forty years so we're just snipping this at the bud, good day Luce."


Reviews are appreciated, also if it interests anyone I'm debating doing a Johnlock fic based on the Detective Conan fic (Not) Supernatural. It wouldn't be a crossover, but the plot would be: Sherlock takes a nosedive into a bunch of needles and gets super-healing and strength and ends up deciding if he's going to have to drink a gross supplement that looks and smells like blood, he's going to have fun with it. To summarise the title would be called No Anderson, Sherlock won't eat you.