Dipper and Mabel Pines had been accepted to the prestigious Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. They were both very excited to start their first term of formal training and their seven year journey learning all their was to know about being outstanding wizards. They'd only just arrived at the school and were already blown away by how grand and amazing the castle was. They were currently standing in the waiting room with all their fellow first years while they waited for the sorting ceremony to begin. Mabel was so excited, she couldn't stop herself from bouncing around.

"Oh my gosh oh my gosh oh my GOSH! This is so exciting, isn't it Dipper?!" she exclaimed to her nervous brother.

"Hehe, yeah. It's… it's pretty dang exciting," he replied, trying to sound enthused, but failing at it. His sister hadn't noticed, though.

"Which houses do you think we'll be in? *GASP* Do you think we'll be in the same house?!"

"I-I don't know. How does this whole sorting thing even work?"

"Maybe they have a unicorn that looks into your heart and tells you which house is best for you."

"Ha! Unicorn? You muggle-borns really don't know anything, do you?"

The twins turned to see where the mocking voice was coming from. A girl with blonde hair, purple eyeshadow and a very smug face stepped forward. Dipper already didn't like her, but Mabel wasn't so easily deterred. She walked right up to the girl and cheerfully introduced herself. "Oh hi. Nice to meet you. I'm Mabel and this is my brother Dipper. What's your name?"

She held out her hand, but instead of shaking it, the girl simply sneered at it. "Pacifica Northwest," she replied. "My family are among the richest and most powerful witches and wizards in the world. Not that you would know anything about that."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Dipper questioned, never one to let his knowledge go insulted.

"Puh-lease. Anybody could see that you two are obviously muggle-borns. You probably didn't even know magic existed until, what, yesterday?"

"Actually, it was about a month ago, after we got our letters," Mabel happily corrected her.

"Right. Well, here's a little advice for you. Pay attention to what all of the real wizards and witches do and try to follow along, okay? Otherwise, you'll just end up embarrassing yourselves over and over again. Oh and Mabel, was it? You might wanna lay off the cauldron cakes and pumpkin pasties for a while, hon."

Pacifica gave Mabel a teasing poke in the belly, where she quickly placed her hands in an attempt to cover it up. Other kids around them giggled as her face blushed in embarrassment. Dipper put his hands on his sister's shoulders to try and comfort her while shooting a hateful glare at Pacifica. In his mind, he struggled to come up with a good comeback to her insults, but eventually, he settled on one. "You know, if your parents are so powerful, then why don't they cast a spell on you to make you less of a jerk?"

The other kids all gasped and oohed as Pacifica stood surprised at being called out by a muggle-born dork. Still, she maintained her composure and haughtily walked away to refrain from stooping down to his level. But in that moment, the rivalry between the Pines twins and the Northwest heiress had officially begun.

Just then, the professor who had escorted them in, Professor McGonagall, returned and ordered the children to follow her into the Great Hall. From what Dipper and Mabel saw when the walked in, the Great Hall was indeed great. The walked down the middle between four long tables occupied by hundreds of older students. Dozens of candles floated in midair and the ceiling appeared to be enchanted to look just like an artificial night sky. At the end of the hall was another long table where the headmaster and all the professors sat waiting for them. They all came to a halt in front of a wooden stool, upon which sat a dusty, raggedy-looking black hat.

At that moment, the man in the center of the professor's table, no doubt the headmaster, stood up and the entire hall went silent. He began to speak. "Welcome, first year students, to the Sorting Ceremony!" he announced. "When Professor McGonagall calls your name, you will come forth, she shall place the sorting hat on your head, and you will be sorted into your houses."

Professor McGonagall called the first name and a boy with red hair went up and took a seat on the stool. Dipper was still confused. How was a dusty old hat supposed to help them decide which house to put them in? His answer came when the hat suddenly sprung to life and started mumbling and rambling before shouting out "Gryffindor!" All of the older students cheered and the boy went to sit at the table with the other Gryffindors.

"Whoa!" Mabel silently exclaimed to him. "Dipper, how cool is that?!" Dipper had to admit, that was pretty cool.

Professor McGonagall continued to call out names and by the fifth or sixth time, he felt like he had a pretty good idea of how the hat did the sorting. By this point, there had been two Gryffindors, two Ravenclaws, one Slytherin and one Hufflepuff.

"Mabel Pines!" Prof. McGonagall announced. Mabel smiled at her brother and said "Wish me luck, bro," before excitedly marching up the steps and taking her seat on the stool. The hat was barely on her head for two seconds before declaring "Hufflepuff!" Dipper clapped along with all the Hufflepuffs. Mabel got up and cheered as she rushed over to sit withe the members of her new house.

"Pacifica Northwest!"

Pacifica stepped forth, sat on the stool and the professor placed the hat on her head. "Hmm. Yes," the hat mumbled. "Strong lineage. Much talent…. Slytherin!"

All the Slytherins cheered as Pacifica stood up and strutted over to their table to join them. Given everything he'd heard about Slytherin, he was hardly surprised. Bunch of arrogant cheaters, they'd said.

"Dipper Pines!"

At last, it was his turn. The young Pines stepped forward, his mind riddled with anxiety and anticipation. Which house would he end up in? What would the hat see when it probed his mind? Did he even get a say? He was about to get the answers to all of these questions as he took a seat and let his teacher place the hat on his head. Right away, the hat began to speak.

"Ah yes. Strong mind, this one. Which can only mean…. Ravenclaw!"

Dipper sighed in relief as the Ravenclaw table erupted with applause. Professor McGonagall removed the sorting hat from his head, allowing him to walk over and join his new housemates at their table. As he sat their enjoying a warm welcome from his fellow Ravenclaws, he noticed his sister waving excitedly at him from her own table. A wave which he gladly returned.