Defense Against the Dark Arts. A class all about learning to use magic for self-defense. And one that Dipper was especially excited for. Their teacher, Professor Lupin, had brought in a cabinet that was shaking and rattling around violently due to the creature that was inside of it. "Listen carefully," the professor said to his class. "What we have here inside this cabinet is a creature known as a boggart. It has the ability to transform itself into the object that one fears most." Every student grew very nervous upon hearing this. "Now there is a rather simple spell which can be used to counter a boggart. Everyone repeat after me. Ridiculous!"
"Ridiculous!" the class repeated.
"Very good. Now I want you all to line up single file." The students did as he commanded and formed a neat single-file line with Grenda standing at the front. "Excellent," Professor Lupin said as he approached Grenda. "Tell me, Miss Grendinator. What is it that you fear most?"
Grenda thought for a second before answering. "Well, I guess that would be… rats," she said with a cringe.
"Alright. Now I'm going to open the cabinet and when that rat appears, I want you to picture something funny in your mind and then cast the spell Ridiculous. Do you understand?"
"Yes. Bring it on!" Grenda said somewhat enthusiastically, much to her teacher's amusement.
"Good attitude," he said stepping away. With a flick of his wand, the lock on the cabinet door magically opened and out crawled a giant hideous angry-looking rat the size of a crocodile.
The rat slowly approached Grenda, hissing and snarling with it's beady eyes and large, crooked teeth. Grenda stood frozen in fear for a moment, but soon, the young witch found the courage to raise her wand up and cast the spell.
"Ridiculous!" Grenda exclaimed, causing a grand piano to fall from the sky and land right on top of the rat with a loud keyboard sound. The rat's head popped out of the top, wobbling back and forth dizzy and confused with a tweeting sound in the air. All the kids in class laughed, as well as Professor Lupin.
"Well done, Grenda. Very well done," the professor congratulated her. "Alright. Who's up next?"
Mabel was the next person in line. When she stepped up, the boggart quickly transformed, taking the shape of a giant cyclops monster made entire out of clay and moving at a very slow and unnatural rate. Almost as if there were bits and pieces missing from its movements. It stared down at her and gave a loud roar.
"AAAAAHHH!" Mabel screamed. "Old-timey stop-motion animation!" Just that declaration alone was enough to make several of the other kids laugh, including Pacifica. Regardless, Professor Lupin offered encouragement to her from the sidelines.
"Pick up your wand, Mabel. Remember, think funny thoughts," he said.
Mabel closed her eyes and pictured the funniest thing she could think of. Then with a flick of her wand, she shouted "Ridiculous!" And just like that, the clay cyclops was transformed into a giant duck dressed up like Napoleon. It quacked mindlessly as it absently looked around the room. Once again, everybody laughed at this hilarious sight, especially Mabel. "Hahahaha! Look at him! He's so adorable!"
Next up was Dipper. As soon as he stepped up, the giant sharply-dressed duck began to transform and shrink down to the size of a normal human. The boggart took the form of a large and very mean-looking adolescent boy with a nasty grin on his face as he slowly approached Dipper.
On the sidelines, Candy whispered to Mabel. "Who is that?" she asked.
"Bobby Varrick. Dipper's old bully," Mabel answered. "He used to pick on Dipper all the time back at our old school."
Dipper was scared, but he held up his wand and told himself that it wasn't real. After a brief calming breath, he flicked his wand and exclaimed "Ridiculous!" Out of nowhere, 'Bobby Varrick's' whole body shuddered as he was comically electrocuted. And then again… and again… and again. One shock after another rendered the once terrifying bully completely unthreatening as the entire class laughed at him, especially Dipper.
"Excellent job, Mr. Pines," Professor Lupin said, praising his student's courage and cleverness. "I'd say that came as quite a shock to him." The laughter seemed to die down a little bit in response to the professor's cliche joke, which he certainly noticed. "Yes, well, Ms. Northwest. Your turn," he said, moving on to the next student in line.
With every bit of her usual confident demeanor, Pacifica stepped up to face the boggart, positive that if those two muggle-born dorks could handle it, then she could definitely handle whatever that creature had to throw at her. After all, humiliating people was something she excelled at.
Once the boggart took notice of Pacifica, as it was still feeling the zap from Dipper's spell, it managed to shake it off and started transforming again to show Pacifica her deepest fear. The young witch readied her wand and steadied her position, feeling fully prepared to defeat this creature. Everyone else watched in anticipation, curious to see what exactly the most popular girl in their class feared more than anything. Finally, the boggart's new form was complete. Before Pacifica stood a man in an expensive-looking suit who was giving Pacifica a rather stern glare. The whole class watched as Pacifica's usual confidence seemed to melt away under the gaze of this man. Something many of them were not accustomed to seeing from her.
Even so, Pacifica was determined not to look weak in front of her classmates, especially not the Pines twins, so she quickly gathered her courage and prepared to cast the spell. "Ridicu-"
But before she could even finish the incantation, the man in front of her pulled out a little bell and gave it a light jingle, effectively silencing her. Everybody else was surprised that something as simple as a ringing bell had made their normally pompous and boastful classmate completely freeze up. Even Dipper and Mabel could hardly believe it. The man started to step closer to Pacifica and she wanted to cast the spell to stop it, but try as she might, she just couldn't find it in her do it.
Her professor noticed her struggle and quickly stepped between her and the boggart, allowing it to transform into his worst fear instead, which, for some reason the students didn't understand, turned out to be a full moon. "Ridiculous!" he said with a wave of his wand, causing the moon to turn into a balloon with a hole in it which made a hilarious farting sound and flew haphazardly around the classroom. It eventually flew back into the cabinet where it had come from, allowing Professor Lupin to lock it back inside.
"Well, I think that's enough for today," he said before addressing the student he'd just defended. "Not to worry, Pacifica. I'm sure you'll get it next time."
The blonde heiress's face turned red with both embarrassment and anger, which wasn't helped by her archenemy Mabel walking up behind her and placing a hand on her shoulder. "It's okay, Pacifica. Learning to stand up to your fears takes time," she said, trying to sound comforting. But Pacifica wasn't having it and harshly pulled away from her.
"Shut up, Mabel! I wasn't scared! I was just waiting until the right moment and I almost had it until Professor Pushy swooped in and ruined my plan! Now leave me alone!"
With that, Pacifica stormed off in a huff. Dipper figured it was best to just leave her be, but Mabel was still a little concerned. Something was clearly bothering her.
A/N: Before anyone asks, Bobby Varrick is just somebody I made up for this story. He is not an official GF character (as far as I know), so I don't wanna see a bunch of comments asking about it, okay?