Hiiiiiii! I'm seriously nervous because I've never written a story in English before but I'm also kinda excited.
It's also my first Boys Over Flowers fanfic! : ) which is outrageous because I've been a fan for about 8 years.
English isn't my first language (it's not even my second language) so please excuse any grammatical errors.
Hope you like it!
Ga Eul looked at her pen and pouted when she saw the bite marks. She felt a pang of remorse. She hadn't realized she had been chewing on her pen lid.
It was a birthday present from Ji Hoo.
Ga Eul was sure Jan Di had correctly informed them that she loved Disney because Ji Hoo had given her an official Winnie the Pooh pen set among some other things from the Disney Store. Woo Bin had gifted her a Pandora bracelet, a Mickey Mouse charm and two other charms that had reminded him of her. He had stated that he would have got her a completed bracelet but it would be more fun if she built it little by little. She had been absolutely mortified. Seriously, how much money were they willing to spend on her? The answer came very quickly when Jun Pyo announced then, proudly, that his gift was a trip to Disneyland. Ga Eul chuckled at the memory. As for Yi Jeong... He had given her a Michael Kors white backpack. It was also sort of linked to his friends' gifts since she could take it to Paris, or that's what Woo Bin had said in a futile attempt to preserve Ga Eul's positive perception of his friend. Ga Eul knew better, though. Of course he had given her a cold, superficial gift. He always had to prove her he didn't care for her the way she wanted to.
She had loved this pen and now it was ruined. She could only blame herself but she had been too anxious. She was trying so hard to stay focused in class. As if Chemistry wasn't hard enough! If it weren't for Ji Hoo sunbae who had nicely offered to tutor her and Jan Di, she would never have passed her last exam. But how was she supposed to pay attention when her friend had been ignoring her all morning?
She had known Kang Min Ho since kindergarten. She was glad she still had a friend at school now that Jan Di attended Shin Hwa. She hated being a loner. But he had been acting very oddly these past few days. He had started making excuses not to hang out with her outside of school, then he stopped replying her texts and talking to her and now he was avoiding eye contact. Could he at least tell her what had she done that made him so angry?
The bell rang and he stormed out of class before she could even call his name.
He didn't know her at all if he genuinely believed she would give up without a fight.
She decided to walk to Min Ho's house. She could have taken the bus but this way she had more time to clear her mind. What would she tell him? Apologizing wasn't exactly easy when she didn't even know what she should be sorry for. Weren't they friends? Why didn't he trust her? Why didn't he come clean to her and tell her what was bothering him?
Her phone buzzed a few times and she took it out of her pocket. It was Yi Jeong. She heaved a sigh and stuck it back in its place. She wasn't in the mood to talk to him. Things were awkward between them now. How couldn't they be when he had offered her up to his father the night before?
If their date hadn't reached the first spot in the top 10 worst dates of all time it was only because whoever made such lists had never heard of it.
She was aware he had done it out of spite. He had been furious at his parents. Who wouldn't have, in his shoes? But of course she had had to pay the piper. He had stomped all over her feelings, as if he cared about her just as much as he did about bits of rock stuck to his shoe. She let out a bitter laugh. As if? How many more times did she have to cry herself to sleep for her to finally realize that to him she was just Jun Pyo's girlfriend's best friend and nothing more?
She felt a little guilty about not picking up her phone because he rarely called unless somehow it involved her best friend. However, Jan Di had F4 by her side and Min Ho had no one but her.
They probably wouldn't even notice her absence anyway.
Yi Jeong cursed when his call went again to voicemail. Was she avoiding him? He admitted he had been a jerk to her but he hadn't expected her to give him the could shoulder. She wasn't the type to hold a grudge. Then again, this time, he had really crossed the line. It was pretty ironic if he thought about it. He had been so annoyed when Jun Pyo had asked him to chaperone her in New Caledonia, her mere presence had irked him, and now here he was, thinking of apologizing to her because he didn't want her to think poorly of him.
"She's not answering your calls?" Yi Jeong rolled his eyes in sheer exasperation and Woo Bin glanced at him.
It was unlike Ga Eul to ignore phone calls, she would usually pick up on the first ring, but Yi Jeong didn't seem worried about it. If anything, Woo Bin read frustration on his face. What had happened between the two of them? He knew he should never have let him leave his studio that night. Yi Jeong was the most affectionate and caring F4 member but Woo Bin knew from first-hand experience he could also be the most cruel one, even worse than Jun Pyo. He hadn't interefered yet because Ga Eul was a tough woman and he was certain that she was the only person who could keep Yi Jeong's feet on the ground right now.
The power of commoners.
Jan Di had changed Jun Pyo and Ji Hoo for the better and now Ga Eul was changing Yi Jeong, too. He himself had also learned some lessons from them. They had taken F4 by storm and he was eternally grateful for it.
He was hoping Ga Eul was stronger than Yi Jeong, because he knew for a fact that Yi Jeong was going to do his best to push her away. It was like an idiotic self-defense mechanism. He had convinced himself love or happiness weren't meant for someone like him, so he attacked like the deadliest predator whenever somebody tried to get closer to him and break down the walls he had built. He had already spoilt his chance with Eun Jae, Woo Bin didn't want him to toss his second chance at love in the trash.
"Why are you staring at me like that?" Yi Jeong growled.
Woo Bin just threw a pair of nylon gloves at him.
"Get your ass over here," he commanded. "We haven't even decided the color of the walls yet."
"I've already told you," he threw himself back on the leather couch, pretending to be calm and composed. He could have fooled anyone, but not his friends who had known him for fifteen years. "Ga Eul-yang said Jan Di hates yellow."
"Well, that's so offensive! I'm not letting her anywhere near my car."
Ga Eul waited at a bus stop. She didn't have the slightest clue where she was. She had walked for half an hour before she realized she was completely lost.
Her conversation with Min Ho had taken a toll on her. She had paid him a visit. Initially, he hadn't wanted to see her, but luckily she had had his mom by her side so he had been forced to confront her in his own house. He had asked her to leave because he didn't want to say something he would regret later on. Stubbornly she had refused, so he did exactly what he was afraid he would do. And it had hurt so much. It had felt like a hundred knives stabbing her. But she hadn't had the courage to fight him, to tell him he was wrong.
"You put them first, alright. But what about them? Have they ever checked up on you? Have they ever asked you how you were? They sent Jan Di away to China without caring that you would have to work twice as hard to cover her shifts. They don't care for you. They don't even care that you have to study for college entrance exams. And they only bring you along so Jan Di won't refuse this rich dude's advances. Have they ever come look for you unless they needed you to save Jan Di's hot mess of a relationship? You always say you're so grateful the potter helped you get back at your ex. Well, I'm sorry to say this, but he wouldn't have helped you if he hadn't accidentally run into you in the street! He humiliates you and the others don't even call you to show their concern. You always put them first and it's so annoying! It's so annoying because you're letting them walk all over you!"
Her fingers started twitching.
Why hadn't she refuted his claims? She knew the answer. She had tried to ignore it, not to think about it, but she couldn't deny this one dark thought had also crossed her mind. She hadn't really expected for Yi Jeong sunbae to go out with her, but she had deluded herself into thinking F4 considered her a friend. She smiled sadly. She was thinking too highly of herself. She wasn't smart. She wasn't beautiful. She wasn't famous. She wasn't rich. She was a nobody. She remembered girls screaming whenever a F4 member passed by them. She should feel lucky they treated her with respect. She was a fool if she seriously hoped for something more.
Yi Jeong sunbae had called her a fool once. She now knew how right he had been.
Her phone buzzed again. This time it was a message from Ji Hoo. They needed her. They would be decorating Jan Di's rooftop apartment.
Well, she had already seen Min Ho. Nothing else stopped her from going.
She looked around and took in her surroundings.
That is, if she could find the way to the F4 lounge.
"She's coming," Ji Hoo announced when he saw her short reply.
Woo Bin stared at Yi Jeong questioningly and perplexed.
"Why is she answering his texts but not yours?"
"How should I know?" He snapped, bending over the pool table to hit the cue ball. There was a deep frown on his face. So she was avoiding him!
"Did you do something?" Ji Hoo cautiously asked. "You know Jan Di is gonna spin kick you if you dare hurt her friend."
"I'm not going to be exactly harmless, either," Woo Bin warned. He was his friend, but he wasn't about to let him cross any boundaries. "Ga Eul-yang is a nice girl. Don't play with her." At his lack of response, Woo Bin paced over to Yi Jeong and removed the pool cue from his hand. Yi Jeong glared at him. Woo Bin wasn't intimidated at all. "I'm serious, Yi Jeong. Jun Pyo has enough problems with Jan Di as it is. The last thing he needs is you starting a war with her best friend."
"Why do you assume it's my fault?" He grumbled. Ji Hoo and Woo Bin both raised an eyebrow.
"Because we weren't born yesterday?"
"Just... fix it," Ji Hoo advised calmly. "As Woo Bin said, Ga Eul is a nice girl. She'll forgive you if you say you're sorry."
Yi Jeong didn't answer. Instead, he grabbed a second cue stick that was hung on the wall.
The decorations had turned out nicely and now they were sitting around a table. They were going to play truth or dare. Ga Eul-yang's suggestion, obviously. No one else could request such a silly game. He had agreed to the conditions. It could work in his favor, after all. He had messed up and now there was something he had to do. There were some things he had to say.
Ji Hoo gave the bottle a spin and it pointed at Yi Jeong.
He looked at her.
Despite the fact that she had rudely ignored him just a few hours ago, she didn't seem mad at him. She was actually enjoying herself.
He almost smiled.
He recalled their disastrous date. He regretted it so much. What had he been thinking? He had used her as his emotional punching bag. His family issues had got the best of him. She in no way had deserved it and yet, she seemed to have forgiven him. He hadn't even got to apologize yet.
He thought of Eun Jae. His lost first love.
Then he remembered his encounter with his dad. Unshockingly, Yi Jeong had just caught him with another woman, someone who clearly was not his mom. He was used to it by now, but his father could disrespect his mother and ruin their lives someplace else, thank you very much. His studio was sacred. He wouldn't craft his art with the ghost of his parents' failed marriage in the room.
"There's only been one woman whom I wanted to live for. After letting her go, the rest are the same."
"Just once in a lifetime. You only get one chance. That's yet another cruel statement."
"Ji Hoo," he called his friend before he could stop himself. Everyone stared at him expectatingly. "Can you love anyone other than Seo Hyun?"
He cringed when Ji Hoo stood up to peck him on the cheek.
It had been funny.
Well, at least the others had had fun watching. He hadn't enjoyed it very much.
Still, he hadn't got the answer he had wanted.
Or perhaps by the longing look Ji Hoo had given Jan Di right before kissing him... He had had.
Ga Eul was starting to hate this silence. They were in his orange lotus. Yi Jeong sunbae had offered her a ride home. She would have refused, but she hadn't wanted to raise any suspicions. Yi Jeong sunbae had always been in charge of her. Jan Di wouldn't stop pestering her with questions if she suddenly switched to Woo Bin. She didn't feel confident enough to turn on the radio, either. She opted to peek through the tinted windows, silently wishing time would go by faster.
"Don't," she interrupted him. "I won't tell Jan Di, so you don't have to worry about that."
He briefly looked at her before he turned his attention back to the road. She had surprised him, but he wasn't about to kill them both. He could be many things, but he wasn't a careless driver.
"You think I care about that?" He muttered under his breath. It was a bold statement because he did care, he didn't want to jeopardize his best friend's relationship, but it was the least of his worries right now.
He felt her big chocolate eyes on him.
"Then...?" She insisted, her lips pressed into a thin line. "You were going to apologize just now, weren't you?"
It was frustrating.
He prided himself on being able to read girls. They were math problems he could always solve. Ga Eul-yang was different. Somehow she always managed to puzzle him. He was an open book to her, though. She understood him even when he himself couldn't. That was something he had always hated about her.
"Can I know why you're rejecting my apology?"
"Because I don't want it if you don't mean it," her gaze pierced him to the core. What was she talking about? "I don't want you to say sorry just so Jun Pyo-sunbae won't be in trouble with Jan Di. I know my place, sunbae and I know where I stand with you. Jan Di doesn't know about last night and I have no intention of telling her, so you don't have to worry about that."
Stopped at a red light, he turned his head.
He suddenly felt short of breath. He could tell she was completely serious.
"I thought you knew by now I don't do anything out of kindness or sympathy. Not even to Jun Pyo. If I do something, it's because I want to. And what I want now is for you to excuse my sorry ass."
"Why?," he repeated, appalled. "Isn't it obvious?"
"No, it certainly isn't," she countered, displeased.
He dug his fingernails into the steering wheel. When the lights all the way down the street turned green, he moved the shifter into first gear to start the car.
"We're friends," he answered without looking at her. She had pissed him off.
"Are we really?"
"Yes, we are!" He yelled. Ga Eul knew she had offended him, but she had the right to feel a little self-conscious, didn't she? "I know you don't believe me but I don't want you to stay mad at me, not only because I don't want Jun Pyo to beat me to a pulp."
He stopped the car again and Ga Eul realized they had reached their destination.
She was home.
She didn't want to leave him yet, though.
He took his phone out of his suit jacket pocket and rummaged through the phone before showing it to her.
"What is this?" She was confused.
It was a picture of a vase. Probably the most beautiful one she had ever seen. Painted with bright colors, it was the warmest piece he had ever made.
"Your birthday gift," he explained, his rage gone the second her eyes stared at the screen in total fascination. She turned her head so quickly she was surprised she didn't feel pain in the neck. Then again, she was most likely numb. His last words had truly shocked her. "I'll be sending it to you tomorrow."
"Sunbae..." Her heart was beating so fast she feared he could hear it. God, and now she could feel a sting of tears in her eyes.
Get yourself together, Ga Eul!
One quick glance at him confirmed her his smugness was back, having sensed the power he had over her. He had that arrogant smirk she despised on his face.
What a conceited rich chaebol.
She hated him so much! And she loved him so much, too. She felt so many emotions when she was around him that it took her breath away.
"Are we good, then?" He asked, because he wanted to make sure of it before she left his side.
Ga Eul smiled.
He didn't love her yet and if he did, he wasn't ready to open his heart to her and tell her how he felt. She wasn't even sure if he'd ever be prepared for that.
But this... Their friendship...
He had proved he cared, hadn't he?
She was content. That was the only thing she had wanted from him.
For now, at least.
She wasn't one to give up on love.
Hadn't she told him that once?
She would regret if for the rest of her life if she let her soulmate go.
Tadaaaa! I wanted to make it longer but truth is I'm not confident enough. As I said, this isn't only my first BOF fanfic but it's also my first fic in English.
I hope you liked it because I certainly enjoyed writing it.
I hope you're all safe and doing well.
Remember, stay home except for essential needs!
See you soon! : )