Standard Fanfic Disclaimer that wouldn't last ten seconds in a court of law. This story is merely fanfic, which is why it's posted at Fanfiction-dot-Net. I do not own Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, its faculty, nor its students. 13th Amendment. I am merely building sandcastles on J. K. Rowling's beach. Warner Bros., Scholastic Books, et al., please do not sue me. There is not meant to be any infringement of copyright. I don't make any money from this story, not a Sickle, not a Knut.

Pop Quiz

Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone

By Susan M. M.

Ron stared at the question on the potions quiz, completely baffled.

#1 If you are making a relaxation potion, and need to double the amount, would ¾ teaspoons of dried sage be increased to:

A 6/4 teaspoons

B 6/8 teaspoons

C 1 ½ teaspoons

D 7 teaspoons

#2 Why is sage a key ingredient in relaxation potions?

#3 What other uses are there for sage?

Hermione raised her hand.

"Yes, Miss Granger?" Professor Snape drawled in a sullen tone.

"Sir, there is more than one correct answer for number one," she pointed out.

"Two points from Gryffindor for giving away answers during a quiz," Snape said. "Select the best possible answer. And please limit yourself to a paragraph or less for the other questions."

Ron's eyes scanned the room, but didn't happen to fall on anyone's paper with the correct answer written in large, friendly letters. He circled B on #1, since that seemed the most likely, doubling both numbers. He skipped #2, having no idea whatsoever what the answer might be, and went straight to #3, 'to sprinkle on poultry before roasting.'

#4 Which is the correct spelling?

Lavender

lavender

Lavinder

#5 What ingredient is missing from the following potion?

#6 Which ingredient is superfluous and why?

Relaxation potion

¾ tsp dried sage

1 tablespoon chamomile

½ tablespoon ground valerian root

½ ounce essence of lavender oil

3 cups Merlot

2 cups distilled water

Bring the liquid ingredients to a boil.

Steep the dry ingredients in the boiling liquid.

Add dried blueberries to taste – no more than four ounces.

Stir slowly.

Strain carefully

Scoop from cauldron. Store at room temperature in a sealed vial. Re-heat before ingesting.

Snape frowned as her graded the quizzes. Charity had been absolutely correct. Offering multiple choice questions made it much faster and easier to grade the quizzes, and he didn't have to attempt to decipher Crabbe and Goyle's execrable penmanship. Granted, it took more preparation time to get the quiz ready, but Charity had warned him of that in advance. He wasn't willing to try the Scantron papers she had described. The students' brains got little enough use as it was.

He scowled when he saw how many dunderheads had gotten the fifth question wrong. Obviously, if the instructions called for dried blueberries and the ingredients list didn't mention them, then that must be the missing ingredient.

All the purebloods, even the blood-traitor Gryffindors, had gotten the first part of the sixth question correct, although their reasons why were as different as cheese and chalk.

"Merlot should never be boiled."

"You wouldn't let us use wine in class."

The correct answer of course was that three cups of Merlot substituted for a calming potion.