80TW for panic attacks
A/N: Thank you all so much for the reviews!
Hogwarts ~ 1978
It wasn't quite Spring yet. There was still a chill in the air, with snow dusting the grounds. But it was one of those mornings where the sun was peeking out through the clouds, enough to let the crowd heading out of the castle know that Winter's end was in sight.
Hermione resituated the small bag on her shoulder. She'd transfigured the leather one she used for classes into a smaller satchel, enough to keep the essentials with her but still maintain a modicum of security. After having her beaded bag attached to her hip all year, she had some trouble parting with it. Now, instead of their clothes, a tent, and any food that they could scrounge up, she only carried the essentials. Her wand, some schoolbooks, a few bottles of dittany. You could never be too careful.
"Another Hogsmeade weekend in the snow. We're so lucky," Marlene said bitterly, wrapping her scarf tightly around her neck.
"Better than being stuck inside the castle," Alice reminded her.
"Is it though?"
"Don't be such a downer, Marls," Sirius said as he wrapped an arm around her. "I'll keep you warm."
She elbowed him in the ribs, but eventually leaned into his touch.
"So, what are we hitting first?" James asked.
"Hermione, anything you missed last time around?" Lily asked.
She shook her head. "I don't think so. But I wouldn't mind stopping by the bookstore again."
Remus sighed happily. "Finally, I'm with my people."
She laughed, linking her arm with him as they continued down the path to the bookstore.
Hermione, Remus, Lily, and Alice wandered in while the others had opted for the quidditch shop. They perused the aisles for a while. Many of the newly stocked books were not so new for Hermione, though they intrigued the others.
"Oh look! The new edition of Magic in the Making. I should get this for my mum. Her birthday's coming up and she's shit at cooking, even with magic," Alice said, laughing.
"My dad was the same," Hermione said. "Could only boil water and even then it was hit or miss."
They smiled, albeit a bit awkwardly. Hermione didn't talk about her parents often. In the beginning she had felt too raw about the situation, and it went well with the cover of them having died. But she missed them, and it felt good to talk about her life with them more. She couldn't very well talk about the others that she missed.
"So," Remus said after they had checked out. "Three Broomsticks?"
"They should be done by now as well," Lily said, nodding. "And personally, I'd like to get out of this cold."
Hermione cast a silent warming charm on the redhead.
Lily rolled her shoulders, relishing in the warmth. "Oh, thanks! You know, sometimes I forget I can do things like that."
She laughed. "I'm the same way."
The Three Broomsticks was filled to the brim with students, all content with hiding away from the cold in the warm pub. They spotted the others in the middle of the room, standing around waiting for a table to open up.
"It's a mess in here," Sirius said when they approached.
"I don't see us finding a table for nine anytime soon," Peter agreed.
"We could go somewhere else," Mary suggested, though there was a question in her tone.
"Where else? Puddifoot's?" Marlene wrinkled her nose.
"What about the Hog's Head?" Hermione suggested.
They all turned to look at her.
"What?" she asked, looking confused. "It's a pub isn't it?"
"Yeah, but Hermione no one ever goes in there," Remus explained. "Except for the odd teacher or passerby."
"Or goat, apparently," James added.
"Well, it's got four walls and butterbeer doesn't it?" Hermione asked rhetorically. "Come on. It's not getting any less crowded in here." She headed towards the exit.
No one followed her. "Are you coming?"
They looked around the pub one more time, but figured that she was right, and followed her out the door.
By the time they made it outside, the clouds had all but vanished, revealing the bright rays of sunlight. The snow was starting to lighten under their feet as they made their way down the village path. The other occupants started to notice as well, as they made their way out of the stores to take in the rarity of sunlight at the end of Winter.
They were about to turn into the Hog's Head when Hermione heard something across the village. She stopped in her tracks, turning her head.
"Hermione?" Lily asked from ahead of her. The rest had noticed her stopping.
She tilted her head, trying to listen, but then turned back to the group. "Sorry," she said, shaking her head. "I thought I heard something. Must've been the wind."
But before she could take a step towards them, she noticed a group heading towards the middle of the village. They moved as one, their black robes rippling in the wind. She could just barely make out a glimmer of silver under their hoods.
Her breath hitched.
And suddenly, a bang. The windows of every shop in the vicinity shattered, blasted away with a flick of their wands. Glass rained down on them as the busy streets erupted in screams.
Seeing those familiar hoods triggered something in her brain. She remembered the mob at the World Cup, using the Muggles as props in their sick and twisted game. That conditioned response told her to fight for her life.
"Get down!" she yelled, whipping out her wand.
They ducked behind the Hog's Head, just in time as streaks of red and green erupted above their heads like some kind of warped Christmas light show. Screams filtered through Hermione's ears as she desperately tried to get a handle on the situation.
Death Eaters. At least six of them, from what she could tell. Probably more she couldn't see. They were wreaking havoc on the storefronts. Drawing the people out and into the streets, she realized.
Not just people. Students.
She turned to the others, their eyes wide in fear. Despite them being the same age, she knew that she had far more experience with these situations. Her childhood hadn't been pretty, but at least she was prepared.
She came up with a plan. "Listen, we need to get as many people as we can out of here. Gather everyone you can and lead them to Honeyduke's. Take them to the cellar and into the castle."
"How did you—" But Sirius was cut off.
"They're his, aren't they?" Lily asked, obviously frightened but masking it well. "You-Know-Who's followers?"
Hermione nodded. "Yes. And they won't hesitate to kill, even kids." She peeked her head around the corner of the pub. "This won't last long. There aren't that many of them and they've made enough noise now that Dumbledore will know what's happened. But that won't stop them from causing as much destruction as they can. We need to move, quickly."
Honeyduke's was a few shops down the path from them. But to get there, they had to run straight through the majority of the fighting. Before she could think about how dangerous this would be, the screams of her fellow students pierced her ears. She saw a frightened group of third years across the way from them, hiding unsuccessfully from the onslaught of terror.
Hermione steeled herself. "Let's go."
She led them out into the chaos, her friends flanking her as they made their way deeper into the village. They collected frightened students along the way, adding them to their group like ducklings trailing after their mother. They finally made it close enough to see Honeyduke's across the way. Luckily, the majority of the fighting seemed to be further down the path, though it was heading towards them slowly.
"We'll need someone to lead them into the castle," Hermione said, nodding towards the haphazard group of students they had picked up along the way.
"I'll go," Peter volunteered. "I've never been the best at defense anyway."
"We'll go too," Mary said, motioning to her and Alice. "We'll stay in the shop so send everyone our way when you find them."
Hermione nodded as they headed off, leading the students with them. "No one else wants to go with them?" she asked her friends. She knew this was their first brush with this level of danger, and she would give them an out if they needed it.
"We want to help," Lily said earnestly, the rest nodding along with her.
"Yeah, are you kidding?" Sirius grinned. "This'll be fun."
"Okay. We shouldn't risk being out here too long. Let's just gather as many people as we can and get—"
But a loud bang cut her off. The Death Eaters had drifted closer and were now moving on to the shop nearest their heads.
That was all it took for their group to split into pairs, each taking on whatever threat they could get their hands on.
"Stupefy!" Hermione yelled, stunning a Death Eater she didn't recognize who had his wand raised at a young Ravenclaw boy. "Go! That way!" She motioned for him to follow the few students that were running towards Mary's waving hand just inside Honeyduke's.
She saw Lily and Marlene dueling a sharp-faced wizard with sunken eyes just ahead of her. She thanked whoever was listening that they were able to hold their own against a grown wizard. Paying attention in Defense really seemed to be paying off.
Sirius was dueling a blonde, stocky man, a twenty-years-younger Yaxley she quickly realized, whilst James gathered a group of third and fourth years who were trying and failing to make themselves hidden behind an overturned park bench. With Sirius as cover, James led them to the candy shop and into the arms of a waiting Mary at the door.
She could feel Remus' steady presence beside her as they jumped into the fray, sending jinxes at the two Death Eaters in front of them.
"Expelliarmus!" Remus shouted, but the wizard he aimed for ducked just in time.
"Children!" he cackled, his face twisted in a maniacal grin. "I thought dear old Dumbledore would have taught you more than that!"
Hermione silenced him with a flick of her wand, just before Remus stunned him into unconsciousness. The grin he shot her didn't even last a second, as he caught something over her shoulder that made his eyes widen.
She turned, quickly honing in on what his eyes had caught.
Lily was crouched over a fallen student, assessing the young girl as she gathered her to her feet. Marlene had her back to the redhead, covering her as she dueled a beady-eyed wizard. With her attention on the fallen student, Lily didn't see the Death Eater stalking towards her from behind, wand raised. Hermione already knew what color the spell would be before the words left his mouth.
Hermione charged through the snow, eyes ablaze as she skidded between her friend and the approaching Dolohov. "Protego!" she shouted, and watched as the bright purple streak of light bounced off of her shield.
Lily looked up at her, surprised and then horrified at what had almost happened.
"Grab her and go!" Hermione said, motioning to the injured girl whose head Lily was cradling. Marlene had finished off the wizard and pulled Lily up by her arms, yanking them both towards the safe haven of Honeyduke's.
"Ahhh," Dolohov tutted. "We have a fighter."
Hermione fought the shiver that rippled through her spine at the familiar voice. The faded scar on her chest gave a twinge.
He moved towards her slowly, like an animal stalking his prey.
But she wasn't anyone's prey. "Expelliarmus!"
He dodged the spell with a wolfish grin. "Is that all old Dumbledore's teaching you in that school?" He sent a curse back her way that she easily ducked.
She gripped her wand tighter. "Incendio!"
The spell only grazed him as he jumped out of its way. The bottom of his robes caught fire, the flames eating their way up his body as he turned his attention towards her. He let the fire crawl up his body, apparently paying it no bother. His expression changed, and he eyed her dangerously.
"Bombarda!" he cried, just before dousing his robes with water.
Hermione felt the storefront behind her explode, flinging her forward onto the cold ground. Shattered glass and splintered wood enveloped her as she ducked, covering herself with her hands. Dust littered the air, and she took shallow breaths to avoid any getting into her lungs.
Her ears were ringing, but his laughter still penetrated her ears. She shot up, sending silent Stupefy after Stupefy his way, hoping to catch him off guard.
He blocked each in turn, but not as easily as he might've hoped.
Her hands were shaking and her head pounding from her proximity to the blast. Her knuckles whitened around her wand. "Sectumsempra!" she cried.
He'd muttered a shield charm, but the force of her spell knocked through it, just barely. She watched as the spell reached his arm, as if she could see the streaks of magic make their way from her wand to its mark. He stumbled back, his outstretched arm littered with shallow cuts. She could see the white cuff under his robe seep red with his blood.
He took in his arm before locking eyes with her, his face mutinous with rage. "You bit—"
"Bombarda!"
Dolohov was lifted off his feet and came crashing down on his back, slamming into the gravel. A strange vision of rugby flashed through her mind, a man being tackled by the force of another player. But this man didn't get up.
She whipped her head to the side, seeing Remus lower his wand. "Are you alright?"
She nodded. "Where are the others?"
It looked like three Death Eaters had fallen. Sirius and James ran up to meet them, having just taken down another, but she couldn't make out any other figures in their vicinity. She had no idea how long they'd been fighting. But it couldn't have been too long. Dumbledore still wasn't here, and there was no way they'd be left on their own for much longer.
"Almost everyone's in Honeyduke's, heading to the castle. We gotta go," he urged.
She nodded, chancing one more glance at the fallen form of Dolohov in the snow, before turning back towards Remus. Just as she was about to believe that they'd actually made it out of this in one piece, a cackle pierced the silence. Hermione's blood ran cold, and she froze on the spot. She saw Sirius whip his head towards the offending noise, eyes wide.
They were across the path from Honeyduke's. All they'd have to do is walk 5 meters and they would easily make it to the cellar and be on their way to the castle. But Hermione was frozen to the spot, hand gripping her wand so tight she thought it might snap from the force. Her breathing got more ragged, barely noticing that she was inhaling smoke and dust from the destroyed village. Suddenly, she wasn't in Hogsmeade anymore. She was lying broken on a stone-cold floor, screaming and shaking with every flick of her wand.
"Hermione," someone said. Ron? No, that wasn't right. "Hermione!" they said again, more forcefully.
There were shouts all around her, and suddenly she was pulled down to the ground, a warm hand placed on her back to keep her down. Someone crouched down in front of her. Messy black hair and crooked glasses. "Harry?" she said.
"Hermione, you need to breathe." Not-Harry said, just before uttering a curse. He moved out of her line of sight, shooting a jinx from behind the wall they were hiding behind.
Right, Hogsmeade. James. She was in Hogsmeade with James and Remus and Sirius. And Bellatrix. Death Eaters were attacking. They had to get to Honeyduke's. She looked around them. They were crouched behind the side of a shop, the bookstore maybe. Sirius and James were in front of her, launching spells from their position. Remus had his hand on her back, a calming presence as he kept his wand up and an eye out behind them.
She looked around her frantically, trying to get a grip on her surroundings. They were behind the wall of a shop, the bookstore maybe. She could feel Remus' strong presence in front of her, gripping his jacket with one hand and her wand in the other like a lifeline.
"Sirius, dear cousin, I know you're out there. Hiding are you?" Bellatrix taunted. That voice. She may as well have held a knife to Hermione's throat for how effectively she had frozen her to the spot, unable to do anything more than breathe out a few ragged breaths.
"We just need to get across to Honeyduke's," Remus said quietly.
"There's no way we're getting through them. There's at least double of them than there are us," James said.
Hermione tried to pull herself up and out of this haze, she really did. She tried to latch onto anything to ground herself to the present movement. But for every soft whisper of Remus beside her, she heard the cackling of Bellatrix across the way. And for every wet clump of snow soaking her jeans at the knees, she felt the cold floor of the manor.
"Oh, thank Merlin," Sirius breathed out beside her.
She'd never seen Dumbledore as fierce as he looked in this moment, charging into the village with his wand aimed in front of him with deadly force. The fire fight that resulted was bright and loud. About half of the Death Eaters had fled just at the sight of him, but those left were fighting with all they had.
A flash of red streaked just above their heads, and then suddenly, a figure appeared in front of them. Hermione couldn't stop the jolt that jerked her body.
"James? Come on guys, you've gotta get back to the castle," a familiar voice said from in front of them.
The others started to move around her, but she still had a tight grip on Remus beside her.
"Hermione?" the same voice said.
The others said something to him, but she didn't hear.
The familiar figure crouched down in front of her. It was Alaric, eyes worried as he assessed her condition.
Her eyes widened as Bellatrix let out a warped laugh from wherever she was.
His face settled in understanding. She knew he'd seen flashes of black unruly hair and cruel grey eyes in more than one of her sessions. And while he'd never outright asked, she knew that he'd known of her injuries when she'd first arrived here. He could put two and two together.
"Alright, Hermione, I need you to breathe with me. Match my breathing." He took exaggerated breaths, patiently waiting as she finally got a handle on her breathing. After a few moments, everything got a little clearer. But she knew she wouldn't be able to fight her way out of this haze until she was out of this war zone. And they were in danger where they were.
"Hermione?" Alaric asked.
She nodded jerkily, gripping his offered hand to help her up off of her knees.
She avoided the worried gazes of her friends behind him. She didn't want to think about that now. Something to worry about that later, when they weren't in danger of being murdered by a bunch of pureblood supremacists.
"Alright, when I give the word you three head straight for Honeyduke's. Get to the castle," Alaric ordered.
"What about you?" Hermione asked, still a little breathless.
"I'll be fine. You've all done most of the work for us," he said, before peeking his head around the corner. "Okay, now."
They launched themselves out from behind the shop as Alaric shot spell after spell to cover them. Crossing the path quickly, they tumbled through the door to Honeyduke's. They had no time to take in the state of the store, only able to fight their way through the overturned tables of sweets and chocolates strewn across the floor. Something crunched under Hermione's foot as she followed the boys on the way to the cellar, something that made her shoes sticky against the stone floors.
They found some solace in the quiet of the passageway, but not enough to slow their pace to the castle. Their heavy breathing echoed in the small space, and their steps pounded loudly in their ears. The squeaking stickiness of her shoe caught Hermione's attention, and she now suspected the offender had been a Cockroach Cluster.
It seemed that barely any time had passed when they approached the steps to the entrance at the One-Eyed Witch's statute. The boys motioned for her to climb through first. She did without hesitation, eager to get out of the cramped passageway and into the familiar warmth of the castle. But as she pushed open the hump on the witch's back, she knew she would soon be fielding questions as to how she knew about this secret only the Marauders shared.
She jumped down from the entrance, eyes darting around her to make sure the area was safe. Other than the soft crackling from the few torches lining the walls, the third-floor corridor was silent as they exited the passageway.
The others looked to her in question once they emerged from the statute, and she realized that they were looking to her for direction. Any insecurities that her very public breakdown would have made her seem weak in their eyes left her immediately. Her throat grew tight, and she was suddenly overwhelmed with a barrage of feelings that she'd been putting off the moment the Death Eaters infiltrated the village.
"Everyone has been directed to the Great Hall," came a voice to their right.
They turned their heads at the sound. It was a painting of an old woman in medieval garb, perched atop a horse. Hermione nodded her thanks to the woman, before leading the others down a staircase that had just stopped its movement.
"Hermione," Remus said finally, after they had reached the bottom of the staircase on the first floor. "How did you know about that passageway?"
"I overheard you boys talking about it once," she said without pausing her stride. "It may come as a surprise, but you aren't the best at keeping secrets."
She could feel the look they gave one another without turning her head. It wasn't an outright lie. She'd seen glimpses of the map in passing and heard whispers going on between the four of them when they thought no one was listening. But she couldn't very well tell them she'd known because she'd seen it on the map twenty years in the future.
"I don't remember ever talking about the specifics of that passageway," Sirius said slowly.
"Well maybe you should learn to be a little more discreet," she responded.
Sirius grabbed her arm, just firm enough to stop them in their tracks.
"Sirius," Remus warned.
"You knew where the cellar was in Honeyduke's and where to push on the statute." He didn't look angry, just curious, like she was a puzzle he was trying to figure out.
She looked over his shoulder and met James' eye, hoping the divulging of her secret in him would help bail her out.
He seemed to catch on, cupping Sirius' shoulder with a firm grip. "Come on, mate. Let's just be happy she did. I don't want to think about what would've happened to us if we hadn't made it back here."
Sirius' brow remained furrowed, but he eased his grip on her arm.
Before anyone could say anything further, the doors to the Great Hall opened before them. The sight froze them to the spot. She thought of refugee camps she'd seen in history books and couldn't find a discernible difference to what she was seeing before her. Cots lined the room where the tables usually sat, with injured students and townspeople being tended to. Professor McGonagall stood in the center of the room, calling out names of students and directing people where to go.
"Lily!" James let out in a breath from beside her.
Hermione followed his gaze and recognized her friend as one of the older students following Madam Pomfrey around, helping her tend to the injured.
Lily caught sight of them once James had called her name. She rushed over, dragging Marlene with her, and gripping tightly onto James as they embraced. "Oh, thank God."
"Where are the others?" Remus asked as Lily hugged each of them in turn.
"Peter and Mary just went to the Hospital Wing to get some more supplies. Alice is over there," she said, pointing to her left. The small brunette witch looked up from where she was hunched over comforting a third-year and met their eyes. She waved at them, as they watched relief wash over her features.
"What about you? Where have you been?"
Hermione felt unease bubble up inside of her as Lily's questioning eyes locked on her.
"Got hung up by some Death Eaters late to the party," Remus said, shifting his weight to stand closer to her. "Luckily, Dumbledore and the others showed up."
"You mean, the Order?" Marlene said, lowering her voice.
James shot Hermione a look. "That's what it looked like. Dumbledore and some aurors."
"And Professor Goldhorn," Remus added.
"Took 'em long enough," Sirius said, somewhat bitterly.
"Apparently they sent a few of them up closer to the castle. To delay help getting to Hogsmeade," Marlene said darkly.
"I just don't understand why they attacked," Lily said. "No one got killed. There are only minor injuries."
"He was sending a message," Hermione said, finally speaking up.
They turned their attention towards her.
As soon as the adrenaline had left her body, she began to think. At first, she thought they may have come for her. She had been discreet, but a new transfer in the middle of her last year? A Slytherin may have gotten suspicious and spread the word. Snape certainly had his eye on her. She felt it in every Potions class since she'd gotten here. But those thoughts quickly went out the window when the Death Eaters didn't seem to pay her any mind. They didn't seek her out and she found no recognition on their faces when she fought them.
The only other option was that they were there to cause mayhem. Voldemort was still just a distant threat to the Wizarding World. They heard rumors about him and his followers, but save Dumbledore and those he's recruited for the Order, no one was taking him as seriously as they should be. She'd read almost everything about Voldemort's first rise while she was at Hogwarts, and studied it even more after fourth year. Perks of having a best friend with a target on his back. This was the summer things started to pick up. The disappearances, the public attacks, the murders. It was beginning.
"A message?" Sirius asked.
"For Dumbledore," she clarified. "And everyone else really. If he can attack us here, at Hogwarts, where parents send their kids to be safe, he can attack us anywhere. Nowhere is safe. Dumbledore's his biggest threat. He's the only one powerful enough to stop him. So, he attacked the safest place in Wizarding Britain. And he did it right under Dumbledore's nose."
They stood in silence, letting her words wash over them. She knew what they were thinking. How quickly they would realize the danger of their situation and their world. This was a turning point for them. Just like seeing Harry appear on the grass with Cedric's body was for her. Or watching Harry crying over Dumbledore's still body. Or getting that patronus from Kingsley in the middle of Bill and Fleur's wedding. All of them, turning points in her life. Moments when her trajectory was spun on its axis, her life heading in a direction she could never have anticipated.
And wasn't that ironic? For how many times her life had been taken down an unexpected path, now she was being forced to live in a world in which she could predict every detail. Flung into the past, every moment was laid out before her, but she could do nothing about it. She saw what was coming, she could see it as if it were written before her in a book she'd read a thousand times. But she could do nothing to stop what was coming. All of the turning points in the lives of the people in front of her. Not one of them could be stopped without risking the future of herself and the Wizarding World.
"Hermione? Hermione?"
She was dragged out of her thoughts, looking expectantly at her friends, an apology on her lips. But they were looking over her shoulder. She turned.
Alaric was approaching them, his robes crinkled and torn in one place on the side. He had a small cut above his left eyebrow. He placed a hand on her shoulder. "Hermione, Professor Dumbledore would like to see you."
It surprised her a little. She expected a meeting with him, but would have assumed he wanted to meet with the Order first. Or the Minister. She nodded.
"Are you all alright?" Alaric asked, just now realizing the group of students behind her.
"We're fine," Marlene said.
"Yeah, thanks for saving our skin back there," Sirius said. His joking tone fell flat with the reality of his words.
"I don't think it's me you should be thanking," he responded, looking at Hermione.
She shuffled her feet, not wanting any more attention drawn to her heroic acts. "I'll meet up with you later," she said to them before they could say anything, and followed Alaric out of the Great Hall.
A/N: Action-packed chapter for you all! The battle scene took much longer to write than I thought it would, and I'm still not completely happy with it, but I hope you liked it! Please leave a review and tell me what you think!
Hope you are all staying happy and healthy. Please leave a review if you can!