I'm back peeps! I'm supposed to be doing schoolwork, but I hate it so much right now because there's a load of it.

Anyway, how are you all doing? I hope you're all well and doing OK in quarantine.

Enjoy this x

Jenny Shepard sat down at her desk, tears in her eyes. She and Gibbs had just had their fourth argument that week, and it was only Wednesday. She hadn't been sleeping well recently, because on Monday it had been fourteen years since her father had died, and tomorrow was the ten year anniversary of her leaving Gibbs, not that he realized. So all in all, not a great week. Just then, Cynthia's voice rang over the intercom.

"Director, Agent DiNozzo is here."

"Send him in, Cynthia," Jenny sighed and Tony walked in.

"Would we be a– Director, are you alright?" He asked gently.

"Fine, Tony. What can I do for you?"

"Are you sure you don't want to talk about it?" She shook her head. "OK, we need a warrant for a house search."

"Tell Gibbs I'll have the warrant to you as soon as I can."

Tony nodded and walked out. Jenny bit her lip to stop herself from crying as she pressed her intercom button, asking Cynthia to get the only person who could help her and to not be disturbed as soon as they reached her office. And then the tears came.


Ducky strided into Jenny's office and opened his mouth to greet her when he noticed her sobbing into her hands at her desk.

"Jennifer?" He closed the door and went right over to her, pulling her into his chest as she cried and cried. "Oh, Jennifer."

She pulled back after a while, wiping her cheeks with the sleeve of her blazer.

"Sorry about that," she said.

"There's no need to apologize. What's wrong?"

"Ten years ago, where was I?"

"Paris, with-" he cut off as he realized. "Ah, this makes sense now."

The redhead nodded.

"It'll be ten years since I left Jethro tomorrow," she stated.

"What else?" He inquired and she looked at him curiously.

"What do you mean?"

"You've been upset all week. Something else is clearly bothering you."

Jenny internally groaned. Of course Ducky had noticed. He had known her for twelve and a half years after all.

"It doesn't matter," she said.

"It does, Jennifer. The team and Abigail are all worried about you. Jethro is as well."

The redhead scoffed.

"He has a funny way of showing it."

"What is it?"

Jenny exhaled, knowing he would not give up.

"On Monday, it had been seventeen years since my Father died."

"Oh Jennifer, I am sorry."

Jenny smiled weakly.

"It's fine."

"What about Jethro?"

Jenny's head snapped to look at the man who was like a second Father to her.

"What about him?"

"Are you going to tell him?"

"Tell him what?"

Ducky gave her a look.

"How you feel."

"I don't know what you mean."

"You do, Jennifer. You still love him. He still loves you."

The redhead shook her head.

"No he doesn't. He can't, not after what I did to him."

"He still loves you, Jennifer," the Scotsman repeated.

Jenny shook her head again.

"Thank you, Ducky," she said.

He nodded, and then walked out, going straight to the bullpen.

"Where's Gibbs?" He asked.

"Coffee break," Ziva told him.

"We're going to meet after work. Come to my house at six. I'll make dinner," Ducky said and the three nodded.

He went back down to Autopsy and called Abby, telling her the same thing. He knew what he had to do, but he needed help to do it.


That night, Tony, Ziva, McGee and Abby all went straight to Ducky's house.

"What's up, Ducky?" Abby asked.

"We need to get Jennifer and Jethro together. It's the only way to sort this mess out."

"I agree," McGee stated. "But how?"

"Easy," Tony said and everyone looked at him. "We pull a typical romance movie and send them both letters pretending to be the other."

"I like your thinking," Abby stated. "Let's get on that tomorrow."

The others all nodded before they ate dinner, and waited for the next day.


Gibbs drove his truck into the NCIS parking lot and got out. He noticed a head of red hair and he made to walk away, but he was too late: she'd spotted him.

"Good morning, Jethro," Jenny acknowledged.

"Morning, Jen," he responded as he got a good look at her.

Her face was pale, and she had dark circles under her eyes. The rims of her eyes were red, and her smile was forced.

"How are you?" He asked her.

"I'm fine," she told him. "How are you?"


She nodded as they walked in together. They reached the elevator and he pressed the buttons for the floor of the bullpen and the floor of her office. They reached the second floor and he got out silently. He looked into her eyes for a while and could have sworn he saw a tear roll down her cheek as the elevator doors closed. He shook his head a little and went to his desk, waiting for his team to arrive.


"Has that warrant arrived yet?" Gibbs asked.

"No," McGee told him.

'What could be taking her so long?' The Marine thought.

"I'm off for coffee," he said suddenly.

He walked out of the bullpen and into the elevator.

"Now's our chance," Tony hissed.

Ziva pulled an envelope from one of her drawers and placed it on Gibbs's desk, before walking up to Jenny's office.

"I have a letter for the Director," she told Cynthia.

Jenny's assistant nodded, pressing the intercom.

"Director, Agent David has a letter for you."

"Send her in, Cynthia," Jenny's voice said.

Cynthia nodded at Ziva to go in and the Israeli did. She saw Jenny sitting at her desk, tears in her eyes and her lip trembling.

"Jenny?" Ziva asked. "What is wrong?"

"Wrong?" Jenny answered. "Nothing's wrong."

"Jenny, you are crying."

Jenny burst into tears again and Ziva wrapped her friend in a hug.

"Oh, Jen."

The redhead pulled back and wiped her cheeks with her hands.

"I'm so sorry, I seem to be doing that a lot this week," she stated.

"It is no matter. Why are you so upset?"

"10 years ago, on this very day, I left Jethro on a plane, with nothing but a letter in the pocket of the coat he gave me. I made a stupid decision, Ziva, one that cost me the man I love forever."

"We all make good and bad decisions, Jen. As Mark Twain once said, 'Good decisions come from experience. Experience comes from making bad decisions'," the Israeli told her friend. "That reminds me. Gibbs asked me to give you this."

Ziva handed her the letter. Jenny looked at it curiously.

"What is it?" The redhead questioned and the younger woman shrugged.

"I have no idea."

"Thank you, Ziva," Jenny told the Mossad officer gratefully.

Ziva squeezed her hand, giving her a small smile and then walked out, leaving Jenny to open the letter.

Meet me at La Chaumiere at 7. The table's under Spears. Don't be late.

The redhead was puzzled. Who on earth would send her the letter? Her head spun around as she thought of the people who knew she liked French food.

'Ducky, Ziva, Jethro,' the redhead thought and stopped, shocked.

Surely this wasn't Gibbs! She shook her head of her thoughts and got back to her work. She would find out tonight.


"What's this?" Gibbs asked his team as he sat down at his desk, holding up an envelope with his name on it.

The other three shared glances.

"We don't know. Gary the mailman brought it in when you were out," McGee told him.

The Marine nodded as he opened it.

Meet me at La Chaumiere at 1900. The table's under Spears. Don't be late.

Gibbs's brow furrowed in confusion. Who the hell sent this letter? Only Ducky and Jenny knew he liked French food. He felt as though he'd just been slapped on the back of the head. Had it been Jenny? He pushed the thoughts to the back of his head. He had work to do. Anyway, he would discover the letter writer at dinner.


Jenny walked into La Chaumiere and stood at the entrance, waiting for a waiter to show her to her table.

"Jen?" She turned around, and there was Gibbs.

"Jethro? Why are you here?"

"I'm meeting someone for dinner. You?"

"Me too."

A waiter walked over.

"Do either of you have a reservation?" He asked.

"Yes," the two of them said at the same time.

"Name, sir?" The waiter inquired.

"Spears," Gibbs answered.

Jenny's head snapped to him.

"What?" The Marine responded as a waitress came over.

"She has a reservation," the waiter told the waitress before he turned to Gibbs. "I'll take you to your table now, sir."

Gibbs nodded and then followed the waiter.

"Reservation name, ma'am?" The waitress asked Jenny, who was still in shock. "Ma'am?"

"Oh, sorry. It's Spears also."

The waitress nodded.

"Follow me, please," she said and Jenny did just that.

They reached a table and Gibbs's eyes widened.

"Jen, what are you doing here?" He asked.

"I guess you're the person I'm meeting," she shrugged as she sat down on the chair opposite Gibbs.

"But how?"

"I have–" Jenny cut off, clenching her teeth in frustration as she realized. "Ducky. He's the only person who knows how much we love French food. I'm going to kill him."

Gibbs rolled his eyes.

"Of course he did," he said.

"Jethro, earlier you wanted to know why I've been so upset this week and I refused to tell you. I'm going to tell you now."

"Jen, you don't have to tell me."

"I want to." Jenny took a deep breath. "On Monday, it was seventeen years since my Father died."

Gibbs's eyes softened.

"Jen, why didn't you tell me?" He asked gently.

"Because we're not lovers anymore, Jethro," she snapped. "And in case you forgot, I ruined everything by becoming a monster."

"You're not a monster. You're just a human being like the rest of us."

"More like a bitch of a human being," she muttered.

"Nope, just a human being."

Jenny's shoulders slumped as she gave in.

"Fine," she said.

"What else is bothering you?" Gibbs asked her in a whisper and she looked up at him in shock and anger.

"Why would you think something else is bothering me? There's nothing else."

"Jen, you have a tell, remember?" He reminded her gently.

Her lip quivered and her eyes glistened with tears as she realized she had to tell him. She had to tell him, because he would not give in. He had never given in, and she knew he was not going to start now.

"Ten years ago, I left you. I left you with nothing but a letter in the comfiest coat I ever had, and every morning I wake up and I think "why the hell did I let him go?" And then I remember. I let you go because I was stupid, and because I was scared that I was replacing someone. But most of all I was scared because I loved you," she looked up at him, a tear track on her cheek. "And I'm sorry, Jethro. I'm more sorry than I can say."

Gibbs looked at Jenny, his heart breaking for her.

"Jen, you were never ever a replacement for Shannon. No one can replace her, but that doesn't mean I can't love you too. I love you, Jenny. I've loved you for eleven years, I was just too stupid to say it before."

Jenny smiled tearfully.

"I love you too." She responded.

Tears were cried that night, but they were not tears of sadness anymore. They were tears of love and light.

Finished! Thanks for reading guys, I love you all so much x