Accessing Kids Next Door Global Mission Archive

Please enter Super Ultra Secret ADMIN Password Code: ******

…Access Approved…

…Please Standby…

…Please select an Operation Report…

Operation: B.I.T.T.E.R.S.W.E.E.T. has been selected.

Please confirm…

Confirmation approved…

Now Loading:

Kids Next Door Mission:

Operation: B.I.T.T.E.R.S.W.E.E.T.

Big
Irresistible
Treats
Turn
Everyone
Rotund
Sweets
Will
Effectively
Enlarge
Totally

…Initiating Transmission…

…Please Standby…


Prologue: Virginia Simms


11:43 A.M. - Virginia's House - San Francisco Suburban Sector


It just a normal summer day when the Skunky Scouts came to the new residence of Numbuh 23; real name Virginia Simms; and caused the first incident. They rolled their custom made (and enormous) shopping cart to the former Kenya girls' doorstep and rang the doorbell, waiting for someone to answer and buy their cookies.

It was about two minutes before Virginia and her mother answered the door. The Skunky Scouts smiled brightly and held up their cookies boxes before speaking.

"Hi!" Greeted one of the Scouts. "It's Skunky Scout Cookie Time! Would you two like to buy some cookies?" The Scout asked nicely.

"Sorry, girls, we're on a diet…" Mrs. Simms said, much to the chagrin of her daughter, who was practically salivating at the sight of the sweets her health-conscious mother was depriving her of.

"Ok, well, at least take a sample…" Another scout said, handing the mother and daughter two cookies each. "They're really good this year!" She gushed as the mother and daughter took the

"Oh, alright…" Mrs. Simms said as she allowed her Ginni to indulge in one cookie. However, the minute they took a bite of their respective wafers, they were bombarded with irresistible flavor and they immediately went wide-eyed. "AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!" Mrs. Simms screamed.

"GIVE US EVERY BOX YOU HAVE!" Virginia screamed as she and her mom took every last box of cookies the scouts had and proceeded to make complete and total pigs out of themselves after splitting the cookies fifty-fifty. The Skunky Scouts just high fived each other after what they believed to be a job well-done.


Later in the week, Sonya, Lee, and Harvey were at the local arcade, perusing the massive collection of games the establishment had inside.

"Played it…" Sonya said in a bored tone of voice as she looked at one of the Mortal Kombat games.

"Own it…" Lee said in a bored tone of voice as he looked at the game Sonya was looking at.

"Beat it…" Harvey said in a bored tone of voice as he looked at the game that his friends were looking at.

"Guys, I think we've finally done it…" Lee said before Harvey's eyes lit up brighter than a Christmas tree. "I think we've played every game in the arcade…" Lee said as a few of the older games were being wheeled out and some new games were coming in.

"Oh, sweet Zero! I can't believe it!" Harvey said ecstatically as he stared at the new games being plugged in.

"I know…" Sonya said, not catching the tone in her haphephobic Sector Leader's voice. "I didn't think playing every game in here was even possible…" She said before Harvey cut her off by running over to the new games.

"Look!" Harvey exclaimed as he darted over to the new games being plugged in. "New games!" He said as Sonya and Lee both excitedly ran over to play the new game…

…Only for the three of them to immediately get a call from Moonbase, ordering them to report to Numbuh 362's office immediately.

"Aw, crud!" They all said in unison as they glumly walked out of the arcade and went to the KND Moonbase to report to Harvey's big sister.


"I can't believe we got a mission on Arcade Day…" Harvey complained as he, Lee, and Sonya entered the Supreme Leader's office.

"Harvey…" Rachel scolded and her brother and his friends sat down on the couch in front of her desk. "This is no time for games, there's a serious situation developing as we speak." Rachel said, piquing Harvey's interest, along with Sonya's and Lee's. Rachel pulled up a screen and it showed a bunch of teenagers walking past some of the Skunky Scouts peddling their new cookies. "As you can see, the new Skunky Scouts Cookie Time is turning every man, woman, teen, and child into criminals…" Rachel said as the footage began showing people of every age (and some were even pudgy or just straight up fat) nearly tearing each other apart and even some people of various ages, adults, kids, teens, and even senior citizens knocking over a delivery truck and raid it for sweets. "They're willing to do anything to get their hands on more of these cookies…" Rachel said as Sector W looked on, shocked to see people willing to go to such great lengths just to get some cookies.

"So, what do you want us to do?" Sonya asked as she was wondering how a single cookie could make people act the way they did on the video. The very thought actually scared her.

"So far, Passion Patties are only available in North America…" Rachel explained as she walked around her desk. "Your mission is to infiltrate the Skunky Scouts and get to the bottom of this cookie craze before they go global." Rachel said as she took out some new 2x4 tech gadgets for Sector W to test whilst on this particular mission. "Now, this week you'll be using a perfume/cologne atomizer stun spray," Rachel said as she held out the aforementioned stun spray disguised as either perfume or cologne. "A Multi-Function Charm Bracelet," Rachel said as she held out a bracelet that had more tools and gadgets than the most complex swiss army knife in the world. "Complete with a drill, a key, a mini dynamite stick, a saw, and a wrench, a holo-camera," Rachel said as she held out a camera that was designed to project holograms. "And a stick pin homing device," Rachel said as she held out a stick pin that doubled as a tracking device.

"Okay, sis, but, uh…" Harvey started to say as he was getting nervous.

"Um, aren't the Skunky Scouts only for girls?" Lee asked and as Rachel smirked, both boys immediately agreed that this mission was not going to be pleasant as they were immediately jumped by some hidden operatives and they were stuffed into the girliest Skunky Scouts uniform they'd ever seen and upon looking at their reflections, they discovered that they had been dolled up to look very convincingly like girls.

"RACHEL!" Harvey shouted as he stared at a reflection of ruby red lipstick-stained lips, blush-powdered cheeks, and eyeliner coated eyes. "Why?" He asked as he noticed that he'd even been given the girliest jewelry that could be convincing for a realistic girl in this day and age to wear.

"And what's with the jewelry?" Lee asked as he looked at himself in his new outfit before discovering that his mother's Russian snow hat had been replaced with a cute, pink beret. "And where's my hat?" He asked right as he and Harvey noticed that even their voices sounded girly.

"Harvey, we can't send Sonya alone, she'll need to have back up and we don't want to arouse suspicion!" Rache told her brother before her tone of voice shifted from serious to jovial. "Besides, I've always wanted a little sister…" She admitted, making Harvey's jaw drop to the floor. "Look, just get a move on…" Rachel said as Harvey and Lee, hanging their heads in defeat, begrudgingly left for the mission, all the while Sonya was giggling at the prospect of Lee and Harvey having to pretend to be girls.