Summary: After another painful encounter with his burly cousin Snotlout, little 7 year old Hiccup has taken to exploring the forest. Despite all the warnings of wild animals that could eat him, or worse, the dragons that could roast him, anything was better than being used as a living training dummy. It only took a few moments for him to get lost, but he would eventually return to the village before nightfall... had he not ran into a certain colorful... person...

CH. 1

Cross posted on AO3

Has all the cast from the movies, plus some OCs

Not big into author's notes? that's cool, just skip this large block o text and get onto reading. Want to know what's up, check out the below.

So big thing to take away from this. This ain't going to be super serious. I had a dream, it was super funny, and now I'm writing it here.

Will characters be OoC? Probably. Will there be OCs? Yes. A few. Are any of them self inserts? No, but every character ever has a bit of their creator mixed in. It's like the signature on paintings. Some are very obvious and can be seen plain as day, others, hidden, and require a bit of digging to get to.

What's the rating? M, but actually T. Why? Because the main OC slings more curse words around than a ticked off sailor. However, no sexual innuendos, or depictions of, or anything of the sort. With the exception of accidents(from me) and verbal teasing from the main OC. Because he doesn't give two shakes of a tail feather and disobeys even me. The rest of the story is canon rating, with the exception that I won't censor death, mayhem, wounds(light or heavy), and the such. So like, T+. But they don't have that here.

You also probably wondering, how good's the grammar? Better than average, but only just. I got a lot of room for improvement so let me know what I can change if you spot something. Remember, that not only helps me be better, it makes it more fun for others to read.

And finally, this is for fun. updates will have no schedule as i don't have a laptop and the phone is crap. Mistakes will happen. I'm not going to promise to complete this. I'll try, but quite frankly all I got for the story is the beginning and part of the middle. I'm open to ideas for an end, but as it stands now, got nothin.

Guess it wasn't finally, if something is to repetitive(with exception to slapstick) let me know. If something happens that doesn't makes sense, or you think shouldn't, tell me why and what and if your reason is valid enough, I'll change it.

This reallly is the finally, there will be magic. and talking dragons. and magical talking dragons. Deal with it. Peace out.

Hiccup clutched his bruised sides as he stumbled through the forest. The mocking jeers from his cousin, and the twins, echoing through his head hurt almost as much as the kicks. At least the pain from the kicks was starting to fade. Though that was soon replaced with a scraped knee when he failed to notice a root sticking out from the ground. It was as if the foul plant grew just to trip him. He didn't cry though, he was tough. A couple of tears and a silent sniffle didn't count as crying. He was seven now, and seven year olds didn't cry. When the pain finally subsided enough for him to walk, he continued on with his trek.

The forest, that he was becoming more and more familiar with recently, was large. Huge even. Most of the bushes were taller than him and the trees looked as if they stretched for eternity. What wasn't covered in bush, was covered in other large plantlife. Vines entwined between multiple trees. Some parts simply scaled from the base to the top, others made living walls of green. There were some flowers blooming, but only the few that could survive Berk's harsh weather.

These were all the things he normally sees when he enters this place, but today he felt the need to go deeper. As far away as he could from the other kids. Maybe they couldn't get to him, if they didn't even know where he was. Thus, with a determined expression, he straightened his back and walked past the flower bed that he set as his self limit. Only to take two steps and fall once again. Thankfully, the flowers absorbed most of the impact and he immediately bounced up and pushed forward.

Hours later, when the sun had just passed its peak, he was beginning to feel that his plan to delve deeper into the forest was a bad idea. He managed to successfully fall, and disorient himself multiple times. To the point he no longer knew which way to go. He wasn't scared though. Not one bit. Seven year olds don't get scared while lost in the forest. That said, he was getting a little worried. Worry that was beginning to wane as the more he walked the closer the sound of a trickling stream of water could be heard.

He let out a sigh of relief when he stepped from behind a large tree to see a decent sized stream of water. Quite a few of their sources of water flowed near the village. He could follow it back home whenever he decided to leave. Which would have been then and there, had it not been for the large dragon that landed right next to him. He froze. What else could he do? The dragon's legs were larger than he was! Not really much of a feat, considering his size, but still!

He could only hopelessly watch as... it moved towards the stream and took a drink? It looked like it didn't even notice him, which was weird considering he wasn't more than two feet from it a moment ago. Yet it ignored him, continuing to drink from the crystal clear water, giving him the perfect opportunity to escape. Which he tried, but, because today seemed like the perfect day for the gods to pick on him, when he took a step back he stepped on a twig. The resulting snap might as well have been as loud as the village's warning bell with how quick the dragon's head snapped towards him. Four silver blue, slitted eyes locked onto his, and for a moment, he felt as if it could read his entire soul. Who he was, will be, wants to be. But that was quickly dispelled when the dragon opened its maw and-

"Yo what the fuck are you looking at?" asked him a question.

"What?" That was all his little seven year old mind could process. He honestly thought that the adults wouldn't have fared much better in terms of response.

It's, though the voice definitely sounded male, eyes narrowed and a small growl slipped through as it, he, answered. "Motherfucker, you deaf? I asked what the fuck you were looking at. If you make me repeat myself again, I'm gonna burn yo pipsqueak ass."

Scared couldn't even begin to describe what he felt right now. Terrified? Horrified? Hopeless? Despair? Those were pretty good descriptions. None of which helped him get an answer out. The sudden very audible growl, however, did. "You!" It came out more of a squeak that sounded like ew, but close enough.

The dragon, for his part, looked a bit taken aback. "Alright you little shit, wasn't expecting an honest answer." the dragon then sat on his haunches and rested his chest on his forelegs. Four wings slowly spread out from his back, the two on the left dipped into the water, while the two on the right stretched out under the sun.

"Here's the deal. My kind," he paused, bringing a claw up to his chin to ponder for a bit, then dropped it and continued just as mildly as he began, "the ones around here that is, are supposed to kill yo squishy asses on sight. Big bitch in the nest don't like you for some reason. Me? I say fuck her. You're a tiny viking thing." He waved a paw in an almost dismissive manner but continued on seamlessly. "The fuck can you do? Fuckin nothing. Waste of effort if you ask me." He bent his head low, low enough to be on eye level with the kid. It hurt his neck a little, being in such an unusual position, but he figured it'd help get the point across.

"That said." He took a deep breath through his nose, the taint of fear, sweat, dirt, and a multitude of other scents assaulted his senses. He didn't care though, there were worse scents he's had the displeasure of encountering. "You haven't run, or wet yourself. Not many can claim that when they see me. You have my respect." He huffed and blew out a small cloud of sparks. "Don't think that means I'll have mercy on your weak ass if we meet in battle. I'll rip you scrawny limb from scrawny limb, got that?" At another round of vigorous nodding he retracted his head and closed his eyes. "Good. Now, go do whatever it is you viking twerps normally do."

Hiccup, ever the graceful person that he is, tripped over every little thing on his way out. Twigs, branches, flowers. If it stuck out of the ground, he tripped over it. It took him a few minutes to calm down enough to properly breath, and isn't that something? He was still breathing. Shaken like a tree during a storm, but alive and breathing. Alive and breathing even after meeting a dragon. A dragon he's never seen before.

A storm of thoughts flooded his mind, most ranging from why it didn't kill him to what type of dragon it was. One of the things that stood out, to him, was what did 'fuck' mean?

Was this short? Absolutely. The rest of the chapters won't be nearly as short as this. This chapter was simply something to show you the two main characters. Hiccup, obviously, and our eloquent dragon friend. Whose name will be revealed later. At some point. The chapter was also used so I can actually get this out. Ya need something to post for a new story.

So tell me your thoughts. Good? Bad? Really bad? Crazy? Ridiculous? I want to hear em. Mind you, if you're going to fling hate, at other commentators, I could fling hate back. or just, you know, enable moderation and keep your comments from reaching the light of day. your choice.

Remember. Don't take this too seriously. I sure don't. It's meant for fun. Laughs. Enjoyment.

That said, if I lose focus, or run out of things to put our characters through... well... ever played sunset overdrive? things will be getting top tier combo.