A/N: Wow wow wow! I was not expecting this much positive feedback from the first chapter, I really appreciate it! I really am trying to work hard on this story so I hope you can understand that it might be hard for me to post really regular updates as I'm trying to make each chapter I write as good as can be. Having said that, I'm hoping that you won't have to wait longer than a week maximum for new chapter updates each time.
One more thing, I didn't want to upload this into the 'crossover' category as I know personally I don't really check it (you have to sort of know what you're looking for already as you have to choose the show you want to read as a crossover with the other show if that makes sense!). What I might do is change where I put this. If you can't find it and want to read it, check the other show's stories and it will probably be there, if not check the crossover section (or you could check my profile). I really hope I explained that ok!
TW- One paragraph towards the end of this chapter has a fairly detailed description of self harm. If you do not wish to read that, then please don't! Either don't read the whole chapter or stop after the paragraph where Chloe is doing her homework (all will become clear) your mental health is far more important to me!
The blonde teenager groaned slightly as the repetitive, annoying ring of her alarm clock sounded once more, signaling the start of a new week. She rolled over to turn it off, the time reading 7:30, fifteen minutes before her mum had to leave and about 30-40 minutes before she did. The hospital where Ange was taking her registrar post was just under a ten minutes drive from their house, five on a really quiet day. Waterloo Road school was a fifteen minute walk away, however Chloe often took a short detour to meet up with Carrie Norton, her closest friend from her year, so that they could walk together.
After changing into her uniform (that was after she'd looked into her mirror for far too long, having words of self-hatred seep into her mind as she realised that her own body shouldn't even be existing) and scooping her shoulder-length hair into a low ponytail, Chloe made it downstairs in time to have breakfast and say goodbye to her mum before she had to leave for work.
"Hey Chloe, sleep okay?" Ange was honestly happy to see Chloe in one piece. She dreaded to think what their conversation form that night meant for Chloe's mental state. She just had to keep reminding herself that she had to tell her eventually. She had to.
"Yeah fine thanks."
"Good, I've got to leave as soon as I'm ready, lunch money's on the side. You're walking to school with Carrie right?"
"What about after school?"
"Probably with Carrie again. But I can walk home on my own mum." Chloe states rather matter-of-factly.
"Yeah I know." Ange worries. She really does. She should just let her daughter get on with her life, but she can't help it. "I just get a bit paranoid darling." A brief silence filled the kitchen before Ange took a breath and spoke again. "Anyway, how are you?"
"Fine." But she wasn't. She'd had that word in her head, playing over and over ever since she'd told her. Rape. "Why wouldn't I be?"
"Because of yesterday sweetheart. What I told you."
She thinks you're weak. She thinks you can't handle the truth. You're pathetic.
"I'm fine. You're the one it happened to, not me."
"Okay, if you're sure." Ange wasn't convinced. "I've really got to hurry sweetheart. Have a good day, my shift ends at half seven so I should be home about quarter to. You know what the hospital can get like though, if they need anyone to stay an extra hour or so it's better me than the F1s!"
"K, bye mum." Chloe wanted the conversation to end. She didn't know why, she just did.
"Bye sweetheart." Ange gave Chloe a kiss on the top of her head before she proceeded to pack her bag and gather all of her belongings.
Chloe got out the muesli and started to pour a bowl. Her mind was a crowd of thoughts. She tried to divert the negative ones by thinking about beneficial things, what homework she had to hand in today etc, however this just made her go into even more of a panic. Did she finish that 'An Inspector Calls' essay for English? What about the maths (linear equations) she couldn't get her head around the other night? Wait, no she finished both. The essay, she had to admit, was not her best but she'd completed it, and she got her mum to help with the maths. Even though Chloe is exceptionally bright, the workload sometimes got too much, however she'd always been able to unwind and not get too stressed over it. Shit. Shit, that was it. Her science worksheet on genetics. That was meant to be yesterday's task. She knew she'd forgotten something.
She dumped her half-eaten breakfast and ran upstairs to her room. She pulled the sheet out of her bag and started to read it. She had about 20 minutes before she had to leave, but time was not on Chloe's mind right now, the work was. She took the same biro she used to write her diary and began to read the first question.
'Humans have two sex chromosones. What are they in a woman?'
XX. Easy, Chloe thought.
'What are they in a man?'
XY. Again, easy.
'What chromosome does a sperm cell have?'
Either X or Y. She knew the answer but couldn't write it down. Sperm, sperm, that word kept replaying in her brain. That's what he gave her, that's what half of her is. She couldn't even look at the next questions. She shoved the paper back into her navy backpack and forcefully pulled the zip across so she could get that sheet locked away. The gliding action of the zip. She pulled it hard, yanked it even, yet it closed the bag with such smoothness. Where there was anger, there was also serenity. She thought it was amazing really. How the two opposites weren't mutually exclusive. An oxymoron, almost. Calm rage.
She couldn't do it anymore. As much as she'd tried to convince herself she was fine, and that she could carry on, she couldn't. She ran into the upstairs bathroom. Not her mother's ensuite, but her own bathroom, and grabbed a fresh razor blade from the cupboard. She couldn't use her current razor, too blunt, she needed the sharpest thing she could find. A similar gliding action to the zip occurred as it sliced her body, an action which allowed Chloe to let out a breath she didn't even know she was holding. She repeated this on her lower arms before she snapped back into reality. The only thing which stopped her from continuing was the remembrance that she actually had to go to school. One thing Chloe never was, was late. She ripped about five squares of toilet paper off of the cardboard roll and pressed them down hard against her arms. Once satisfied that the bleeding had ceased, she flushed the paper down the toilet and headed out of her bathroom and back into her bedroom to finish getting ready.
In perfect timing, as she had just headed back downstairs and slipped her black school shoes back on (in too much of a rush to bother undoing the laces first), her blackberry buzzed in her hand. She looked down to check the message, already having guessed who the sender was.
I'm by the bench as usual. R u ok? You've usually come by now. Text back if you're coming, see you soon! Carrie xx
Chloe got her fingers to work, typing quicker than perhaps she ever had before to reply to her best friend.
Yeah I'm coming, sorry overslept! Just leaving mine now, should be there in 5 if I run. Chlo x
As good as her word, Chloe hurried out the door and managed to make it to the park bench where they always met in just short of five minutes.
"Wow speedy! Maybe you should try out for the cross country team this year!" Carrie exclaimed as she saw Chloe approaching. Despite the location of the school (Greenock, Scotland) Carrie Norton had a southern English accent.
"God no, I'd be awful! You'd be awesome for the girls football though."
"Yeah! Come on Carrie, I've seen you play loads, you're so good!"
"Maybe I will then."
Chloe and Carrie headed off in the direction of their school. Chloe let out a smile, remembering how good it feels when she laughs and jokes with her best friend. She soon remembered her arm, and the pain. It didn't make her sad or upset, it just made her feel different than usual. Chloe's heart sank as she approached the school building, the words 'Waterloo Road' glaring at her on the wall. She's always loved school, loved learning, especially in science, but now she dreaded it all because of one homework task and the contents of that task. Genetics.