After the storm…

N.B everything belongs to BBC Holby City

To all Jac/Joseph fans – keep the faith! X

Blood pounded in her ears – tears blurred her vision – still she rode – where was she going? She had absolutely no idea. She could hardly think all she knew was that she had to keep riding, she had to get away.

Joseph calmly sat in the traffic, waiting – he was back for a conference – Faye had offered to accompany him but with Harry needing to attend school – they had agreed it was best if only he went – deep down – he was relived, not that he had cause to complain about his life with Faye; it was a good life…but that was it…a good life. Suddenly, a motorbike roared past him, it made him sit up…that bike…that rider…oddly familiar… without thinking – he slowly pulled out of the queue and followed. He followed and followed, down a quiet lane by a forest – where was she going?

Jac pulled up and yanked her helmet off…then she threw herself down and started to cry.

A few weeks earlier…

'Right! Does her ladyship require anything else?'

Jac smiled and kissed Fletch gently. 'Why don't you just sit down for a minute?'

'Look madam,,,it's a beautiful day – I have a lovely woman and I'm not going to waste it.'

She smiled. 'You're an old romantic Fletch.'

'Yeah!' He kissed her again. 'I love you.'

'I love you too.'

'Really?'

'Really.'

He grinned. 'Right! Let's get this show on the road.'

'Jac?'

'JAC?'

She stopped crying – it sounded like…music to her ears…but no, NO! Why was fate being so cruel? And how dare he after she told him to never return…

It was her! Joseph felt his heart quicken – he felt light-headed. Common sense would require him to turn round and go back but he was selectively deaf these days. He watched Jac, his Jac, just sitting there on a fallen tree crying and crying, his heart broke.

'Hey Jac!'

'Get away from me!' She couldn't handle this…not now…not ever!

'Jac! What's the matter? What's happened? Are you hurt?'

She felt him grab her, it was now or never! Sanctuary! Flinging her arms around him, she clung to him for dear life, breathing in his familiar scent, which made her cry even more.

A few moments later

'I thought I told you to stay away.'

'Well…I tried telling them to have the conference somewhere else but for some reason, they didn't seem to take "On account of my ex-girlfriend living there" as a valid excuse – it's political correctness gone mad!'

She laughed through her tears. 'How's Faye?'

'Like a brand new woman…thanks to you…'

Jac closed her eyes as she remembered the heart transplant she had done for her a few months back, the storm stuck in her mind.

'Why were you crying?'

She looked up at him, Joseph Byrne, the love of her life, the man she threw away for a promotion she didn't get anyway.

'Oh I-I just needed some space…'

'What's happened?'

'Nothing…'

'Jac…'

'Nothing! Honestly!'

'Right! So you fly through the traffic, go off route and sit here in tears for nothing.'

'It-it just…I don't know…'

'Is it Emma? Has something happened?'

'No…it's just-' She looked up at him. 'Fletch and I…we've become…'

'Oh…' Something flickered in his eyes, only for a second though, then vanished. 'Good, I'm pleased for you.'

'Are you? Are you really?'

'Jac…'

'He's a good man and he gives me everything and his great with Emma…'

'Jac…'

'But he's not you! He'll never be you!'

'I thought we discussed this…'

She turned to him, the tears flowed down her cheeks. 'I know, I know, but I-I can't stop thinking about that kiss…'

'Jac.. don't!'

'Well…don't you?!'

He closed his eyes, he couldn't hide from the truth any longer. 'I think about it all the time…in fact I went to look for you afterwards but you'd gone.'

She shook her head. 'I couldn't stay there and watch you play happy families.'

'I'm not playing.'

'No but you're settling.'

Joseph didn't reply…he couldn't deny it.

'And you really want that more than me and you!'

'You destroyed any chance of that happening.'

'I KNOW!' She broke down in tears again. 'I naively thought you could separate the two – I was only ever using your father but not you…NEVER you!' She turned to him. 'Joe…You're the love of my life… I can't take this anymore – I can't stick it, I'm cracking up!'

Joseph cradled her face, he was in serious danger of giving in – of throwing everything up in the air, the temptation was so near that his heart quickened – he forgot Faye and Harry for a split second. 'Oh Jac! What IS this thing between us?'

She looked up into his eyes, adrenaline rushed though both of them, their pupils dilated, their lips were three inches away, two inches…one…

Joseph closed his eyes – it was like coming up for air- absorbing her as much as he could. Holding her so tightly as if his life depended on it.

She clung to him for dear life – in the time and moment…he was hers...all hers

Could there be anymore? She never wanted to see him again – it was too painful – but she desperately wanted those moments – the two were linked.

Joseph slowly stopped the kiss and gazed into her eyes – it had to stop – he had to be strong – but in that moment – he wasn't sure that he could and as he looked into her begging eyes, he knew that neither of them wanted it to. It was a private struggle between them, an ongoing saga that neither of them secretly wanted to end.