A/N: I've missed writing about my fav. So here's a little story, kinda sad, kinda sweet, but just a drabble based on a few songs.
THIS TOTALLY WAS MEANT TO BE A RYAN CENTRIC ONE SHOT BUT I NEEDED ANOTHER CHARACTER AND BAM! This happened. Oh well.
Ryan had never believed in love. And he was convinced that it didn't work, especially after the amount of stories he'd heard about unhappy marriages and relationships that end up being toxic for years. He didn't want that. The young CSI liked to think he was better off on his own, a fling once in a while, but refused to let it get past that point.
Love is a feeling, but acting upon feelings is purely by choice. "She's wrong, and she'll get hurt for that." He muttered to himself. The bandaging felt rough on his thigh, but he couldn't do much about it. A shootout left him shot in the leg.. he could only imagine that pain in the heart. It'd hurt like hell.
Love is unfair. Love is cruel. Love ends up being mislabeled lust.
"Daydreaming again?" Eric teased, sitting down beside him on the couch.
"I was shot, Eric. It's not like I've been sitting on my ass doing fuck all." Ryan retorted harshly. Realizing how cold he sounded, the younger man leaned his head against the pillow and groaned. Wolfe had a habit of pushing people away. He didn't like people knowing personal things about him. As stingy as it sounded, it was a privacy thing. The less they knew, the better.
Eric pursed his lips. He'd been there, and his leg hurt for months, but Ryan had thick skin. This would be like that wrist injury he failed to mention that had occurred after the makeshift meth lab in the apartment building that almost got him and Alexx. These seemed like old injuries he never got treated.. though the Cuban knew Ryan wouldn't be willingly to talk about the danger that ensued during his time on patrol.
"You're contemplating the future again. I can see it in the way you're sitting."
The younger man shook his head, mumbling under his breath in Italian. "It's none of your business, Eric."
"I didn't know you spoken Italian."
"There's a lot of things you don't know," Wolfe told him in that matter-of-factly tone he used regularly. "I can't believe you're making me stay at your place.. I live closer to the lab!"
Eric handed him a pile of different colored folders. "You were whining, I couldn't be bothered to drive all the way back."
'Bastard.' Ryan shifted through the folders, carefully organizing each one subconsciously. He didn't think that he was that annoying. The only thing he'd complained about was the sun in his eyes. There were so many things he wanted to do in the comfort of his own condo. Wolfe was convinced that Eric thought he knew him, even though he didn't.
He had no idea that brown eyes were shifting over every movement of his. Eric's curiosity was getting the best of him. The older man couldn't help it. He'd always thought of Ryan in such a way. There were things he was better at, like running, in comparison to something he was better at - like diving - and that was where they were polar opposites. Their personalities typically clashed, hence why Ryan had once said:
"If me and Eric ever dated, it would be like the clash of two passionate people doing their best to keep control of their tempers. It wouldn't work."
But that was before Eric grew to learn how much of a bookworm Ryan was. He loved going to the library, listening to music and reading. His go-to, instead of clubs, or parties. It wasn't quite what he thought, however, Delko didn't feel like judging him would be correct. He'd probably had it rough in his earlier years. That was unfortunately easy to tell by the guard he kept up all the time.
"I don't think we'd be awful together." Eric said aloud, in spur of the moment.
Ryan's head darted up, as if he'd been about to fall asleep before those words hit him. "Seriously? Two weeks later?"
"You're just opposed to the idea of falling in love with me." He proclaimed with a smug look plastered on his face. Ryan huffed, folding his arms as he turned away from the older man. "Love is torture."
"Why don't you give it a try?" Delko suggested.
"Falling in love with you? I'd rather get shot again." He wouldn't really, but Ryan remained adamant that letting Eric see past his defensive attitude should never happen. That guy would never let him live it down.
Even if he did fall for Eric, unrequited love had become his biggest fear.
"I could love you, if you gave me a chance."
"No thanks." Ryan stated. "I'd rather die knowing I lived safely than die knowing I love someone more than they ever loved me."
"But I could." Eric whispered, in a much more serious tone, his gaze focusing on the TV screen instead of his colleague seated next to him. The younger man felt his cheeks heat up. 'No, you could not.' Ryan thought, trying to rid those words before they planted themselves into his thoughts. Too late.
Could he really love me?